44. James
JAMES
The moment you show your cards, they know you’re playing the game. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t speak. All I could do was stand there and watch Will accept my betrayal like he deserved it.
Tony had called it déjà vu, and he was right. Even the whiskey in Will’s hand was the same as the night he’d learned he wasn’t getting the part, only this time I was the one who’d kicked him while he was down.
I wanted to explain, to tell him everything. But with Tony and Derek there, my hands were tied. I doubted it would make a difference anyway. Almost everything Tony had said was true, and if Will knew about the video, he’d feel even guiltier. Maybe even enough to turn himself in.
Robert was right. I was Will’s last hope. If I didn’t protect him, no one would. His dad was dying, his brother was a fucking Care Bear, and his mother cared more about her own pleasure than her son’s future.
“See, Will? He’s a liar, and he’s not even that hot,” Derek said, though no one was paying him any attention.
I’d followed Tony down here, desperate to stop this very thing from happening, but I was too late. Now I had a choice: break Will’s heart and keep the upper hand, or tell him the truth and let Tony win.
Derek put his arm around Will’s shoulder and pulled him close. “Fuck this asshole. He’s not important. Once he gets his payday, you’ll never have to see him again.”
All my life, I’d been the type to punch first and ask questions later. So why was I just standing there while Derek hung all over Will? Before I could answer myself, Miles burst into the room.
“Will, come quick,” he said. “It’s your dad. He’s collapsed.”
I wanted to reach for Will as he ran past, Derek’s arm still slung over his shoulder, but I couldn’t even bring myself to look him in the eye.
“James, are you coming?” Miles asked.
I didn’t respond, and he didn’t wait for an answer—just left me alone with Tony.
“Shame about Robert,” Tony said conversationally over the frantic whispers of the bartenders. “I thought he had longer. Want a drink?” He patted the barstool beside him. “I’ve been sober twenty years, but you look like you could use one. Plus, we have business to discuss.”
I looked up at the bramble-covered ceiling and sighed. The world felt upside down. “You don’t know the half of it,” I said, meeting his smug gaze. “But not now. I’ll be in touch.”
Without another word, I walked out. But instead of going upstairs, I made my way below deck, hoping to find a bathroom to lock myself in. I settled for a room full of stacked chairs and folded-up tables instead. I kicked the wall, then slumped against it.
I considered smoking the rest of the joint in my pocket, but I needed to keep my head on straight. Will needed me. So did Theo.
By staying silent, I hadn’t avoided making a choice.
My silence was a choice, a choice to finish what Robert had started and take care of Will, to finish what Travis had started and set Theo up for life.
It didn’t matter what I wanted. I gave up that right the moment I snuck Esther into Andy Chapman’s bachelor party.
I listened for sirens, but what I eventually heard was much worse: the thrum of a helicopter. Shit. What if Robert dies tonight?
Theo and Esther found me shortly after the helicopter flew away and the ship began its long slog back to Burlington.
“What are you doing in here?” Theo asked. “Why didn’t you go with Will?”
“He knows.” I stared at the patterned blue carpet through my knees. “He knows everything.”
“What do you mean everything?”
I lifted my head. “I fucked up.”
It was a long time before Theo spoke. “Does this mean we have to go home?”
I bit my lip and nodded.
“Theo, go see if you can scrounge up some of those macarons,” Esther said. “I need to have a quick word alone with your uncle. And get the pink ones.”
Theo left without protest, and Esther slid down the wall beside me.
“You shouldn’t have come down here with him. What if someone saw you two together?”
She shrugged. “He was worried. No one could find you. And relax, no one saw us. They were too busy talking about Robert and what happened to Derek Hall.”
“What happened to Derek?”
Esther grinned. “You’ll get a kick out of this.
Apparently, Derek’s new girlfriend called William a crybaby, so Derek told her to fuck off and go eat some celery.
Pretty weak insult, but it seemed to do the trick, assuming he wanted to piss off an Irish model with three-inch nails.
She got him good, too. Almost scratched his eye out. ”
I didn’t laugh, and Esther’s tone grew serious. “Did you get it installed?”
I nodded.
“Does William know about me?”
I shook my head.
“So he doesn’t know everything. He doesn’t even know you’re working with his father to take down Tony Wallingford, does he? What does Tony have on Robert anyway? He’s blackmailing him, isn’t he?”
I didn’t respond. Esther was like a shark. She could smell a drop of blood from an ocean away.
“It’s about William, isn’t it? Is it proof that he did it?”
The joint in my breast pocket must have caught her eye, because she plucked it out with nimble fingers. Then, producing a lighter from her own pocket, she lit up.
“You actually like this one, don’t you?” she said, exhaling a billow of smoke. “Makes sense. You always were an ass man.”
She passed me the joint, and I hit it, because why the fuck not?
“Talk to me, Jimmy. I promise, I’m not gonna say a word. Trust me, that was a beast of an NDA, and I know who butters my bread. Robert was very generous. Hell, I’d fucking shoot Wallingford myself for what he’s paying me.”
I took a second hit before answering. “Robert wants me to blackmail Tony, but make Tony think I’m blackmailing him and Donna, too.”
Esther nodded in understanding. She was the smartest person I knew.
“I see, so now you have to pretend you were only fucking William to screw him over. That’s brutal, babe.
But don’t worry, I’ve got you. We’ll nail that fucker’s balls to the wall, and then you can go right back to tapping that fine ass. ”
“It’s not gonna be that easy, not if Robert dies tonight.” Even if Will knew everything, it wouldn’t change the fact that I’d cost him his job.
“Trust me, I know men like Tony Wallingford. I bet he’s got a ton of secrets on his phone. I hear he’s a regular Harvey Weinstein when it comes to recruiting new talent, especially the young ones.”
“How did he seem?” I asked.
“Who? Tony? I don’t know—”
“No, Will.”
“He’s fine. A little shaken, maybe, but fine. I think I get why you like him so much. He’s just like you. Thinks he has to be strong and take care of everyone else.”
We finished the joint in silence, and I let my head thud back against the wall. “I can’t do this,” I confessed. I was in way over my head.