Chapter 16
Sixteen
Ursula
When I woke, there was a black bodysuit waiting on a mannequin in the corner of my room and a pink Post-it stuck to it with wear me written on it in black Sharpie.
A gift from Felditch. Sliding out of bed, I went over to check it out, lifting the sleeve and running my fingers along it.
It was made of a light flexible material I’d never seen before.
My gaze slid to the door. I’d slept like shit last night.
After I’d left Silas’s room I’d tossed and turned.
Like an idiot, I’d wanted to go back, but doing that would be masochistic and I wasn’t into hurting myself.
Living in a fantasy world, pretending Silas had real feelings for me, wasn’t something I could do.
Shoving those thoughts aside, I rushed through my shower, then pulled on the suit, not allowing myself to think too much about what could happen today.
Whatever it took, we needed to win this, for Hell and for Lucifer.
A loss wasn’t acceptable, and I couldn’t allow anything to distract me.
Especially not the angel I could hear pacing around in the other room.
Quickly tying my hair up in a ponytail, I slid on my boots, took a fortifying breath, ignored all the pointless emotions battering me, and strode out.
Silas spun to face me as soon as I set foot in the living room, his gaze sliding down my body and back up. He was wearing the same getup as me, the suit clinging to his huge muscled body.
My belly swooped, and I ignored that as well. “You ever seen anything like this?” I said, running my hand along my arm over the thin material.
“I assume it’s just for show. It’s definitely not armor.” He pointed to the digital clock on the wall counting down. “We have to leave soon.”
I nodded as I grabbed my bag and quickly went through my usual routine, adding a drop of each poison to a mug. “Any guess on what Felditch has in store for us today?”
He studied me, not answering for several seconds while I added water to my poisonous brew, then drank it. His jaw tightened and he straightened his spine. “I assume some kind of battle until one team is defeated or someone surrenders.” He looked away, fussing with his suit.
“That would be my assumption as well.” He wasn’t looking at me. “Are you okay?”
His silver gaze sliced back to me. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
Okay. He seemed angry, whether he actually was, I couldn’t say, and that was the problem, wasn’t it?
I shrugged. “No idea.” I grabbed my axe and knives, and strapped them on. “Let’s go, then.”
We headed out, striding along the hallway, across the room, and out through the main doors.
Felditch’s sun burned down on us, glinting off the gold in Silas’s hair and warming me through my dark suit.
Time seemed to have no logic here. If we were in Roxburgh, the sun would be sitting much lower in the sky than it was for this time of the day.
We rounded the manor, heading toward the field, the sound of thunderous cheering reached us.
Silas and I looked at each other as he cursed. A moment later, the field vanished, the world going dark for several seconds, before it burst back into reality. We were no longer on the path by the manor, we were striding along a stone passageway. “We’re back in the arena.”
Silas kept his eyes trained ahead. “Felditch will want a spectacle for the final event.”
“Not just a spectacle, he’ll want blood.”
“If he thinks I’ll kill for his amusement, he’s wrong.”
I spun to him, surprised. “You might not have a choice.”
“If we can end this without murdering anyone, that would be my preference. My aim is to get the angels to surrender.”
What the hell was going on here? “How are you going to do that? Nathaniel would happily slice you open and watch you bleed out. He’d kill you in a heartbeat.”
“I’m not Nathaniel.”
I didn’t get it. Why the conscience all of a sudden? He may have an issue with killing those fucksticks, but I sure as hell didn’t, and I’d much prefer we were on the same page going into this fight.
We strode up to the huge opening that led out to the main arena. On the opposite side, Nathaniel and Eloa stood, their wings arching high over their shoulders, their swords already in their hands.
Silas stiffened beside me.
“What is it?”
“Check out the stands.”
Unlike last time, this crowd wasn’t some illusion. The knights were up there with their mates, the hounds as well.
“And there,” he said.
Lucifer sat surrounded by my sisters.
“They’ve brought everyone here that we love,” Silas said.
I looked up at him. “So it is possible, then?” The words fell from me before I could stop them.
“What?” he said, but was obviously distracted, still scanning the crowd.
This was the wrong time to bring this up, but I realized after this was over, whether we lived or died, this could be the last chance I had to talk to him about us.
I didn’t want to die without being totally honest with him.
It felt vitally important right then, no matter how much pain I might cause myself.
“You know my specialty is poisons, but that’s not my only one. ”
He turned back to me, his gaze searching mine. “I’m not sure what we’re talking about?”
“I can read other people’s emotions, Silas. I don’t do it often, I don’t like to pry into people’s shit, and honestly, most of the time I don’t want to know, but with you, I’ve looked…more than once.”
His stormy gaze seemed to swirl and darken, and he leaned closer. “And what did you see?”
“Like Nathaniel and Eloa, and every other angel I’ve encountered, nothing. You feel nothing, Silas. There is nothing inside you but an empty void.”
His head jerked back. “So that’s why you keep pulling away from me?”
“You have to see that allowing myself to fall for you would be a form of self-harm, even someone as messed up as me has no desire to do that.”
He hissed out a breath and grabbed my wrist, tugging me closer. “I assure you, Ursula, I can fucking feel.”
I shook my head. “I don’t believe you, but that’s okay. I don’t know how this fight will go, but I wanted you to know before we walk out there that you don’t have to pretend with me, not anymore.”
“You think I’m pretending?” His body went rigid. He still had his fingers curled around my wrist, and he lifted my hand, pressing it to his chest. “Trust me, the emotions are there.”
He was lying. He had to be. “Okay, then what are you feeling right now?”
His eyes narrowed. “If you don’t know by now, Urs, I doubt you ever will. It’s obvious I’ve been wasting my time here.”
It was my turn to jerk back. “Silas—”
He strode out, and I had no choice but to follow him.
The crowd went wild when we entered the arena, and I shoved down the doubts now swirling around inside my head.
I turned in a slow circle, taking it all in.
The knights, the hellhounds, Lucifer and my sisters were on one side, surrounded by a lot of people I’d never seen before.
The other side had several rows filled with angels.
One of them jumped to her feet and called Silas’s name.
He turned and she smiled, waving to him.
She was so beautiful, it was as if the sun shone from her.
My stomach knotted. It was her, the female who’d once been his intended.
I didn’t need him to tell me. I instantly knew.
My hand went to the handle of my axe all on its own when he lifted a hand acknowledging her as well.
“They’re the fucking enemy, Silas. Or have you forgotten?” I bit out.
He said nothing, just took his place beside me, facing off with Nathaniel and Eloa. We were supposed to fight as a team, and now he wouldn’t even talk to me, let alone look at me after what I’d said to him. Like he was actually hurt. Like he’d been telling me the truth. But how?
Why had I said anything? Way to fuck everything up, Ursula. I glanced up at him and something had changed. He looked almost unrecognizable. The control he always carried around like armor was gone. Obliterated.
No one cold or emotionless could look like that, could they?
The doubt inside me deepened.
I touched this arm. “Silas?”
Lightning flashed, forking from the sky and singeing the ground in the center of the arena.
Felditch appeared, shooting down the lightning and landing in his superhero pose.
He was even wearing red and blue today. He was a clash of colors in his glittering jumpsuit and cape with his orange hair flowing around his face like dancing flames in the sunlight.
He shot to his feet, lifting his hands, encouraging the crowd’s excitement, hyping them up for several minutes, then finally slashed his hands downward, asking them to quiet.
“We have two events for you today,” he called, his voice echoing around the arena as if he were wearing a microphone.
“For the first, a penalty must be paid.” The leaderboard flashed up, huge and high above the crowd, showing our scores, and that the angels were ahead, thanks to last night’s game of truth.
“Team Hell will be taking on a creature with a craving for immortal blood!” The cheers rose again.
Motherfucker. I was about fucking done with this asshole’s monster collection trying to take a bite out of me.
“And the second event? If our losers survive, what better way to finish this than a fight to the death!”
This time when everyone cheered, I noticed the knights, Lucifer and my sisters, weren’t. They had no idea that they could potentially be forced to watch me and Silas die today, and it was a definite possibility with Silas refusing to actually kill anyone.
“Of course, there is also the cowardly option of surrender,” he added.
The randoms in the crowd booed, letting us know they’d rather see us slaughtered.
“Hell, are you ready!”
Silas nodded, and so did I.
Felditch flashed his maniacal grin, then slowly lifted his arms. As he did, a thick stone wall rose from the ground between us and the angels, separating the arena in two with a tall, thick wall, and simultaneously giving us less room to get away from whatever he was about to unleash.
The tunnel we’d just walked through now had an iron gate concealing whatever was behind it.
“Whatever comes at us, we need to take the offensive,” I said. “We go after it, over and over again, until we exhaust it.”
Silas nodded. “If it can bleed, we need to make sure it loses as much blood as possible.”
At least he was talking now. I shook out my hands and pulled my axe free, while Silas rolled his shoulders, laser focused on whatever the hell was behind that gate.
“Ready?” he said to me.
“As I’ll ever be.”