Chapter 37
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Kash
When I woke up the next morning, Mila was still fast asleep in our bed, wrapped up tightly in the blankets. Her hair was a mess, but she was gloriously naked and not opposed to me waking her up with my head between her thighs.
Since then, we’ve gotten into a fun little game of seeing who gets up first. If it’s me, my head is buried in heaven, and if it’s Mila, I wake up already wrapped around her heat.
To me, it’s a win-win either way. While she gets cleaned up and ready for the day, I make breakfast for my girl and see her off to work.
It’s been fucking amazing.
Now it’s almost the weekend and I’m standing at my station, finishing the final touches in the shop.
It took longer than I liked, but once we get back from the wedding this weekend, we’re going to be reopening our doors to clients.
More of the floor had to be replaced at my booth than I realized, along with mirrors too. Atlas was oddly pissed about that.
Our clients have been really good about rescheduling while we remodeled, but it’s about time. I miss it. I’ve been sketching and keeping up with my portfolio when I haven’t been with Mila, but I’m ready for normal again. The future looks so good with the shop opening again and having my girl.
I haven’t heard anything from Cassie about Bri, so I’m guessing no news is good news.
It was a surprise to find out that Bri came from a wealthy family.
They offered to pay for the damages, but none of us wanted their money.
Her parents were pretty insistent that it didn’t get out that she went berserk and destroyed our shop.
It was bad enough she was covered in tattoos and working here, but to slum it over with one of us…
that would have been just too much for their precious image. Whatever. Good riddance to bad news.
Seth and Rhett ran out to grab lunch, and I’m debating how much time I have to spend here before I go see my girl.
It’s been five hours, and I’m in need of a hit.
Atlas and Cora are huddled around the computer in the reception area, figuring out appointments and when they can break away for a honeymoon. Cute little lovebirds.
I haven’t broached the topic with Mila yet, but I want to tell everyone about us.
My brothers and Cora obviously know, but I don’t know if Mila has told her parents or Mara about us yet.
I get that we’re new, but I want Mila to claim me.
I don’t want to hide our relationship. She wants to wait until after the wedding, but I don’t know if that’s going to work.
I can’t keep my distance from her or pretend like I don’t know what it feels like to be inside her.
Fuck, now I’m hard. Shaking my head, I grab my keys and head toward the front.
“Are you leaving for the day?” Cora questions as I near them.
“Who cares?” Atlas quips, putting his arm around her shoulders and pulling her closer.
“Care Bear cares, unlike you. Honestly, Cora, how do you handle his grumpiness? You could have had any of us,” I goad him, giving her a big grin. I only have eyes for one person, but it’s still fun to push his buttons.
“I don't know, Kash,” Atlas drawls slowly, his dark gaze locking on me. “If she had someone else, I guess that would leave Mila open to someone else too.”
Even though I walked into that one, red still clouds my vision. The idea of Mila being with someone else, even hypothetically, makes me want to destroy the shop we just put back together.
Elbowing him in the side, Cora gives him a sharp look. “Leave him be.”
“He started it. He called you Care Bear and made smiley eyes at you,” Atlas complains, then shifts his gaze back to me. “Brother or not, I should knock you out.”
“You could try.” I smirk, then salute the two love birds. Now that I’ve ruffled his feathers, my job is done. “Later, Nichols family.”
Heading out to my SUV, since I finally got it back, everything feels right.
Atlas is getting married this weekend and will finally have a lifetime of happiness he deserves—both him and Cora.
I’ll officially have Noah as my cool-as shit-nephew, and with any luck, I can get Mila to introduce me to her parents as her boyfriend, not just knowing me as Atlas’ brother.
Switching my car on, I’m suddenly nervous.
What if they take one look at me and my tattoos and decide I’m not good enough for Mila?
I’ve never met a girlfriend’s parents, and I don’t know how to make the best impression if I’m just being myself.
I want them to like me for her. It’s one thing to be around because of Cora and Atlas, but I’m not even sure they know she’s living with me.
Rhett’s words ring in my ears. This could get dicey.
If I had a daughter, I don’t know if I’d want her shacked up with a guy like me. Damn it.
Thumbing through my contacts, I wait as it rings a few times. When the call finally connects, I sigh in relief. “Hey, are you free Friday? I need your help.”
The voice pauses, and I hear a few clicks in the background. “Can it wait until next week?”
“No. It has to be before Saturday afternoon.”
“Hold on. Let me see if I can move something around. What time can you be here?”
“Whatever time you want me. I owe you one.”
“Damn right you do. See you Saturday at nine, Kash.”
Looking at the screen as the call disconnects, I laugh and toss my phone onto the passenger seat. Now that’s taken care of, I head toward Twin Roasts. It’s time to visit my girl and make sure her parents see me as a good fit for her.
It’s the night before the wedding, and it’s absolute chaos.
I love it. Love is in the air, and Emma supervises while the guys and I help assemble the arch of dahlias that Cora wanted.
There’s a shit ton of flowers, and I don’t even want to think about how much these cost alone.
Atlas doesn’t care. Whatever Cora wants, Cora gets.
Although, to be fair, it’s the only thing she requested.
Mila’s dad is going to walk her down the aisle tomorrow, and Noah is going to be Atlas' best man. I’m so fucking happy for them both. They deserve it. After everything they’ve had to overcome, if anyone deserves a happily ever after, it's them.
Going in search of my girl, who I know is somewhere around here, I fantasize about what our wedding is going to be like.
I’ve had a ring for a while now, just waiting for a good time to ask.
I don’t care about any of the details, just so long as Mila says yes to meeting me at the altar and taking my last name.
It might be too soon for some people, but for me, it’s not soon enough.
Mila’s presence in my life has given me a purpose.
I never realized that what I was doing before wasn’t living; it was surviving, existing.
I closed myself off to letting people in after everything happened.
I just couldn’t understand how she claimed to love our family, and then months later chose to start over like she didn’t have a whole life already.
For the longest time, I thought I wasn’t enough for her, that something in me was lacking, that if I was enough, she would have stayed, but as I grew up, I realized she was the one missing something.
It’s different with the guys and Emma. My dad would have loved them.
They’re my brothers, and we’re bonded by our own shitty circumstances.
None of us had a choice in the hands we were dealt or the families we were born into, but when Emma chose to keep each of us, she started a new one, and little by little, we’re adding to our group.
Emma was there for every fight, achievement, dance, or big moment of our lives. By the time we were almost through high school, we finally figured out that Emma was the real deal. Her husband was a stupid fuck for leaving her. I’m so lucky I landed with her and the guys.
“What are you doing, trouble?” Emma slides up next to me as I break down a few boxes.
“Knitting a sweater, of course.”
Emma stares at me for a moment, then pinches my side. “Smartass.”
“Hey, you asked, and I answered.” I grin down at her. “Did you need help with something else?”
“No. Just wanted to check on you. I know how you feel about the whole wedding and marriage thing.”
Pausing, my eyes zero in on my girl across the room with her sister and Cora.
They’re talking in the corner and something Cora says has Mila throwing her head back in laughter.
Jealousy flares through me, but I immediately push it down.
Other people can make her laugh—well maybe just Cora and her sister. I’d punch someone else if they did it.
Following my gaze, Emma smirks. “Did you get bit by the love bug too, Kash?”
The tables are set up for tomorrow, and it makes me glad it’s not a huge wedding.
Way less work. Besides the Morgan family, Cora only wanted to invite a few people from the library, and since Atty doesn’t really like people, it’s not a large audience.
They found a local bed-and-breakfast that specializes in intimate weddings.
It’s a mix of country and modern; even I can admit it’s cute.
Sitting down at one of the tables, I keep my eyes on Mila, but answer Emma’s question. “I did.”
Focusing on the girls, Emma smiles. “Mila’s a very sweet girl, Kash. I like it.”
As if hearing her name, Mila turns in our direction.
Her face softens and she offers me a shy smile.
I want to blow a kiss at her, but I settle for a grin and wink.
I can see the blush from across the room, and I don’t even mind when she walks off with the girls.
I love knowing I can make her flush without even touching her.
“Is it that obvious? I like her a lot, Emma,” I admit softly. In fact, I more than like her; I love Mila with my entire existence, but Emma doesn’t need to know that.
“Oh, trust me, anyone with eyes can tell.” She laughs, putting her hand on my arm. “You seem confident about this. Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for your happiness, but what changed? What makes her so special for you to turn your back on all of your rules?”
“Mila is above those rules. She’s the exception to all of them. They don’t apply to her.” I know exactly what she’s talking about.
Kash ~ age 16
“It’s not worth being mad over, Kash. Why be mad at what you can't change?”
Emma sits beside me in the backyard. I’m too busy plucking blades of grass out to give her a response. Mother’s Day is today, and I hate everything. I hate her. I stew in silence for a minute. “I just don’t get it,” I admit quietly. “Why wasn’t I enough?”
Wrapping her arm around my shoulders, Emma pulls me closer to her. “You are enough, Kash. You were enough the moment you took your first breath.”
“Then why didn’t she stay?” I hate how babyish it sounds coming out. I’m sixteen, almost six feet tall, and I’m sulking because I don’t have my mom.
“I can’t answer that for her. Maybe losing your dad broke something in her, and she didn’t know how to fix it.”
“But I’m broken too.”
“You are not broken, Kash. A little bruised and hurt, sure, but never broken.”
“Bruised enough she wouldn’t stay. Bruised enough she didn’t want me.”
“You can’t put what other people do on yourself. You are not responsible for their decisions. Only yours.”
“Yeah, well I’m never having a relationship or getting married.”
Shaking her head, Emma looks at me with sadness. “Kash, you’ll miss out on some amazing experiences if you do that. Don’t close yourself off to people.”
“Not all people, just relationships. If I leave first, no one can leave me, right?”
"You can’t control what happens in the universe. Your dad’s death is proof of that.”
Standing to my full height, I stare down at Emma in disbelief. “He never would have left if she had died instead. He didn’t get a choice. She had the choice! She chose to leave me!”
Rising from her seat, Emma crosses her arms over her chest. “You’re right. She did make the choice, and she chose wrong, but—”
“But nothing, Emma. I’m going to make my own rules. No relationships. No marriage. No promises. No being broken. If I leave first, no one can leave me behind.”
Shaking her head sadly, Emma pats my shoulder.
“Whatever you say, Kash, but I can promise you this: one day that’s going to change, and when it happens, I won’t say I told you so.
I’ll just be happy you finally allowed yourself to believe that you deserve love and are willing to put yourself out there for it. ”
Turning on her heel, Emma heads back into the house. She’s going to be waiting a long time. Staring at the sky, I say a silent apology to my dad and a fuck you to the universe.
“Mila is so far above all those rules I thought I needed. She’s everything to me, Emma.”
Smiling, Emma pats my hand. “I’m happy for you.”
Chuckling, I know it’s taking everything in her not to bust my balls. “No I told you so?”
Someone calls her name and she stands from the table.
Leaning down to kiss my head, like any mother would do, she shakes her head.
“Absolutely not. I promised that when you found the person who would make you realize how deserving of love you are, I would only wish you the best, and this is me doing that.”
Exhaling in relief, I sit back in my chair. “Thanks, Emma.”
“Anytime, Kash, and besides, I just love when I’m right.”
My eyes flash to her and narrow. “I thought you said you wouldn’t say I told you so.”
As she walks away, Emma hollers over her shoulder, “I didn’t. I only said I love being right. Pay attention.”