Chapter Sixteen Jake
Chapter Sixteen
Jake
I’ve been trying all night to keep a smile plastered on my face, but deep down, Tiffany’s question has rocked me.
Not because I don’t think I can live here. I know I can.
I just don’t know how to clean up the mess I’ve left in Sacramento.
“So, when Declan gets here in a few days, you girls need to come out to Heatherbrae, and we can have a big cook-up. Don’t worry, I’ll be doing the cooking, because Jake here is no chef.
I’m not sure how a grandson of Gran’s can be so useless.
” Chase takes great delight in throwing me under the bus for my lack of chef skills.
Tiff throws her hands over her face in despair.
“Oh, they will make a fine pair. Looks like I’ll be cooking freezer meals for both of you now.
Seriously, Jake, you were supposed to be the savior that Ash needs to make sure she eats properly.
Her terrible cooking skills would have her surviving off instant noodles if it wasn’t for me providing her some home-cooked nutritious meals. ”
“Hey, I can’t excel at everything. I’m a great builder, and I have it on good authority that I also have some other special skills . . .” I say, wrapping my arm around Ash’s shoulders and pulling her closer to me.
“Do share with the class.” Tiff, as usual, is trying to encourage a conversation about our sex life.
“Please don’t. I can do without stories of my cousin and his escapades. Remember, I’m sharing a shower with him, so I don’t want to know what he’s doing in there all on his own.” Chase responds to Tiff with his own humor.
“I can assure you, he’s not in there doing that all on his own,” Ash replies with the straightest of faces, which makes Chase and Tiff break into fits of laughter and leaves me shocked at her confidence.
Even though it’s just a joke, it has me thinking about taking her there, when no one is around, of course.
“That’s it, you two are banned from the shower in the barn. It’s a no-go zone. I don’t care how smelly this guy gets, I refuse to shower after him.”
We all start laughing at Chase’s panic.
“What you don’t know won’t hurt you.” I sit smugly in my chair as Kimberly walks by and places our check on the table.
This is the part of the night that always makes me nervous; hoping that my credit card won’t be declined.
It puts a cold shiver through me every time.
I can’t wait until I get back to a point in my life where I don’t have to worry about an empty bank account.
But until the phone calls stop, I can’t move on.
And while carrying this stress all on my own makes it even harder, the shame of it makes me hide it deeper.
I reach out to grab the check off the table, but Chase grabs it out from under my hand. “I’ve got this one, buddy. You can get the next one.” I want to argue, but the relief that runs through me has me accepting his offer.
“Time to take my weary little body home to bed so I can get some sleep before an early start tomorrow.” Tiff stands, and we all follow her out.
“And you complain I work too hard,” Ash says.
I step outside the restaurant and the breeze has cooled somewhat, which makes the heat of the evening more bearable.
“No, no, no, I don’t like that.” Tiff stands still, wrapping her arms around herself.
“What’s wrong?” Ash asks, giving her a hug.
“There has been a shift, and not in a good way. No, I need to do something about that. I must go. It needs fixing now. I’m not letting that darkness gain traction.” Tiff shivers and is now talking to herself like we aren’t even here.
“Can we walk you home?” Chase looks as concerned as I am.
“Nope. I don’t want it to touch any of you. Go. Go home.” Tiff turns on her heel and hurries off down the street toward the teahouse before anyone can say another word.
“What the hell was all that about?” Chase asks, turning to Ash.
“I don’t know, and I’ve given up asking because I usually end up just as confused as I was before she starts explaining it.
Tiffany is a very spiritual being and feels all sorts of things that none of us have any idea about.
Well, that’s what she tells me, anyway. I don’t really believe any of it, but I’m not game to completely discount it either.
If I’ve learned anything in all the years I’ve known her, it’s better just to let her go do what she needs to do.
If it’s something she wants to share with you, she’ll let you know. ”
“Okkkaaay thennnn.” Chase looks at Ashley like she’s the one who’s insane.
“I understand what you mean by woo-woo now. It’s similar to cuckoo.
” He twirls his finger in circles next to his head.
“Well, I’m heading back, so I guess I’ll see you both tomorrow.
” Already chuckling, he leans in and kisses Ash on the cheek and slaps me on the shoulder.
“I thought we might spend the night at the barn tonight,” I tease Chase as he starts walking to Gramps’s truck. I don’t need to wait long before he quickly flips me the bird and yells out, “Be careful the games you play, Jake, karma is a bitch.”
Jumping into the truck, he starts the engine and backs out of the parking space as Ashley and I both laugh and head to my truck.
“Is Tiff really okay?” I ask as we drive back to Windemere. The breeze is still strong enough to throw sticks across the road but nothing too major. “I know she can be quirky, and some of the stories you’ve told me are a bit out there, but she seemed a bit distressed.”
“I think so. She does things like that occasionally, but I’ll admit she was freaking me out a little tonight too. I’ll message her later to check in,” Ash replies, looking out the window.
While she’s distracted, I’m trying to think of a way to bring up my life before I came to Abbey Falls and what led me here.
I know she hates secrets, and I should have told her from the beginning, but it never felt like the right time.
It’s not really a secret, though I haven’t really told anyone .
. . I wish I’d told her that night in the woods when we were sharing about the hurt from our prior relationships, but we agreed to just be friends.
And now I’m so deep in this mess of not telling her that I don’t know how she’s going to react. But it’s only fair that I lay all my cards on the table, she should know the man I really am.
“Looks like your naked night under the stars will have to be canceled with this wind.” Ash’s playful voice pulls me out of my thoughts as we rattle up her drive and the farmhouse comes into view.
“Don’t act like you ever intended to go through with it.” I poke Ash in her side where she’s a little ticklish. All those little spots, those little things I now know about her.
“I thought about it . . .”
Pulling the truck to a stop at the side of the house, we both climb out, and I hang back a little to watch her walk up the porch steps without a care in the world. It’s like I’m soaking in every single moment now. I know it’s time. I have to tell her.
In her living room, Ash kicks off her sandals and flops down onto the couch.
“Who knew that a day of hiking and swimming would take so much out of me? You don’t look half as exhausted as I feel.
” She lifts her arms up into the air, beckoning me over to lie down beside her, but instead, I lift her legs and sit on the end of the couch.
“Are you okay?” She looks concerned and wriggles backward to sit herself up next to me.
“We need to talk, Ash.” I’m aware that these are words that no woman ever wants to hear from their boyfriend.
“Oh, Jake, if it’s about what Tiff asked you tonight, don’t worry about it. We both knew what we were walking into. We were honest with each other.” She rests her hand on top of mine.
“Not entirely.” I feel sick saying the words as I watch her retreat from me a little.
“What do you mean?” The worry and hurt in her eyes almost kill me.
“There is something I need to tell you. It explains why I’m here.” I can feel the sweat building on my hands, and the dinner I ate begins to churn in my stomach.
“You are here for your gran and Heatherbrae, right?”
“Yes, that was always my main intention, but something else was driving me to move here.” Gulping, I stop, then, taking a deep breath, let it all pour out.
“I also came here to hide from my mistakes. I ran from Sacramento because it was the easy solution. But I know now that I should’ve stayed and faced things head-on.”
“Jake, you’re scaring me,” she confesses and then is asking, “Are you in danger? Is that it?”
“No, Ash, nothing like that, but I am running from something that I need to sort out before I can be the man you need me to be.” I rub my sweaty hands on my jeans, but it’s not helping.
“Jake, for fuck’s sake just tell me, before I get sick.” She’s already hugging her arms to her belly like she’s on the verge of having a meltdown. A feeling I share with her right this minute.
“I’m broke, Ash. When Danika left and took all our cash, she also left me with a house that is mortgaged to the hilt.
I was working so hard just trying to keep the roof over my head.
My business was going well for a while, but when one big client didn’t pay, I took a heavy financial hit and things started to snowball.
A friend of mine suggested I invest the little bit of cashflow that I did have into crypto.
He told me about a friend of a friend who had tripled his money in three weeks. ”
Running my hands through my hair, I can see her shutting down before my eyes. And saying this out loud reminds me how desperate I was.