Chapter 34 Outside Pressure
OUTSIDE PRESSURE
At eleven, Alana arrived at Brennan’s.
She’d gotten the text that Celia had shown up at ten thirty, even though eleven was the set time.
It was fine for her since she didn’t want to arrive the same time. That might look too staged.
And it’d give Brennan time to bring her up.
But when she walked in the front door and saw the younger woman turn her head, shocked to see someone else entering the house, she realized Brennan hadn’t done it yet.
“Alana,” Becca said, rushing her like she always did and hitting her legs to hug her.
“Hey there, sweetie.”
“My friend Polly is here and Polly’s mother. They are staying for lunch too.”
“That’s nice,” she said. She looked at Brennan and saw his flush. “Daddy asked me to stop and get cupcakes because he forgot to do it.”
“We’re getting cupcakes,” Becca yelled. “Polly and I love cupcakes.”
She looked at the other little girl playing with Becca’s dollhouse in the playroom off the foyer. Celia and Brennan were in the living room on the other side from the girls.
The two of them talking about Alana’s existence most likely hadn’t come up.
She was going to cut him some slack.
As long as it’d been since she’d swum in the dating pool, she would have seen the signs that Brennan wasn’t interested. And it wasn’t as if Celia asked for a second date.
“I love cupcakes too. I’ve got six of them.”
“One for everyone,” Becca said, counting them all in the room.
“That’s right,” she said.
Brennan stood up and walked toward her, took the box out of her hand and leaned in to give her a kiss. “Thanks for picking these up for me.”
He was playing along with the ruse that she’d thought up this morning.
She didn’t want to pop in and sit there like she was jealous and monitoring the situation. That would have been awkward all around for everyone.
This was better, and she could sneak back out if it worked that way.
“I didn’t know you were dating someone,” Celia said, standing up. “I’m Polly’s mom, Celia. Brennan and I just went on a date not that long ago.”
Oh yeah. She knew women like this.
Starting trouble. It didn’t even have to be the lengthy once over she got.
She came in jeans and sneakers, a cotton shirt under her jacket. She wasn’t here to impress anyone and wouldn’t lower herself to put on tight jeans and a shirt that might fit Becca better.
Just like Celia was wearing.
“We’ve been dating less than a month,” she said. This didn’t put a time limit on it but was after the babysitting gig. Not a lie in the least. She didn’t want Brennan to be thought of as a player.
“Oh,” Celia said. “How did you two meet?”
“We work together,” Alana said. Might as well be a bitch and put it out there because she could see that Celia didn’t look as if she was going to back down or back away.
If there was one thing she knew on this island, the Bond name had people stepping back.
“I moved from Boston a year ago when my cousin Kelsey Raymond said they had an opening on the island. Since I’ve been here most of my life with my extended family, I thought I’d try. ”
Couldn’t get much clearer than that.
“You’re a Bond?”
“That’s not my last name. I’ll go put these in the kitchen.”
Brennan came into the kitchen before she could pull the cupcakes out. “Celia just left. She said she’ll be back at one.”
“She didn’t have to leave because of me,” she said. “I was actually going to leave. That’s why I didn’t take my jacket off.”
“She said she hadn’t planned on staying, that she had a bunch of things to do, but only wanted to chat for a few minutes before she left Polly.”
“Do you believe her?”
“No,” he said. “Every time I opened my mouth to bring your name up, she interrupted me. She was going on and on about Christmas and problems with her ex, then the way gifts were purchased. I swear all she did was vent.”
“Not the best impression to give a guy you might be interested in,” she said.
“It’s over now. I appreciate you doing this. I’m sure I’m a wuss in your eyes.”
“No,” she said, moving closer to him for a hug. He looked as if he needed it. “You’re a nice person. Sometimes nice people don’t make the best decisions because they put others first. If anyone knows that, it’s me. I turned a blind eye over my ex having a woman best friend.”
She still wondered if she should have questioned it more to prevent it.
Then she wondered why she was even thinking that when Jonathan’s actions were the best thing that could have happened to them.
She’d probably still be engaged to him with no shot of a wedding or kids for another five years if he hadn’t cheated.
The more she thought of it, Jonathan never wanted to settle down. His career was too important to him and impressing the right people.
She was a means to an end. If she’d said that she didn’t want to marry or have kids, he would have been fine with it.
Pressure from family and friends forced that ring more than anything else. She knew and hated it happened.
It was one thing she promised herself. She wouldn’t fall for outside pressure again to control her pace in a relationship.
Not unless it was what she really wanted.
“That’s not the same thing,” he said. “You were with him for years and in love and thought you could trust him to not betray you.”
“I did, but I also accepted that I never knew exactly what love was.”
She knew it now. She felt it with Brennan, but wasn’t sure he was ready to hear it.
Nor was she ready to say it.
“I know that myself,” he said. “I didn’t have it with Rene.”
“Have you been in love before?”
She thought it was a good question. Someone his age who never felt it might not be able to.
He could just want that fast family for his daughter more than a life partner.
“I have been,” he said. “I think there are different levels and degrees of love in our lives, but I have felt it before.”
She felt a sense of contentment wash over her. “Anyone you wish you could have gone back and tried with again?”
“No,” he said. “My past is where it needs to be. I’m more concerned about my future.”
She frowned. “How about the present?”
He kissed her. “That too.”
“Daddy,” Becca said, running in. “Polly needs to go potty.”
“Show her where the bathroom is,” he said, grinning.
“She has to poop and needs help,” Becca said.
She felt Brennan stiffen. This was where being a single father of a daughter could get tricky.
“How about I help her,” Alana said.
Becca grabbed her hand. “Okay. Are you staying for lunch with us?”
“I am,” she said. “Then after your nap I thought maybe we could all go out to dinner together. What do you think of that?”
“I like eating out,” Becca said.
Might as well put it out there for the island to see.
On Monday she wanted it known at work too. There was no reason to hide a damn thing in her life and she was going to make sure Brennan knew that.
Too many times she let others write the narrative of her relationships and this time she was putting her fingers on the keyboard.
When Polly was done, and the girls were back in the playroom, she went to the living room with Brennan.
“Hope it was okay to bring up dinner to Becca like that. I probably should have cleared it with you first.”
“I was going to suggest it,” he said. “So I have no problem.”
“On Monday I’m going to let staff know about us. Not sure how yet. Not an announcement, but maybe just us talking about the weekend or plans in the open.”
“I’m on board with that.” He was grinning.
“It doesn’t put you off that I’m making these decisions?”
He pulled her under his arm. “Nope. I make all the decisions in my and Becca’s life. It’s nice to hand it over to someone else. If it’s not something I agree with or think won’t work, you’ll be the first to find out.”
“That was easier than I thought,” she said, putting her head on his shoulder.
“I’m a pretty easy guy.”
“You are. One that I find I’m getting extremely close to. Problem with that?”
“Not at all,” he said, kissing her on the forehead. “I like this side of you.”
“What side is that?”
“The one where you’re coming into your own and taking no bull crap from other people. You’re putting yourself and your feelings first.” He leaned in and lowered his voice. “It’s sexy.”
She flushed. “As sexy as the other night?”
“Nothing can top that, but it’s right up there.”
His praise had her limbs tingling as if they’d just woken up after a long slumber.
“I’m always nervous about being selfish.”
He laughed. “You realize there isn’t one selfish bone in your body. You give back to everyone and everything.”
“And I was told that is selfish because I put that first,” she said.
One stupid argument she and Jonathan had often.
“Don’t let that dickhead come between us. I mean it. Put him from your mind or I’m going to be pissed if you’re comparing us.”
“Is it horrible of me to say that I like this aggressive, angry side of you?”
“I don’t show it often,” he said. “But I’m not a pushover either.”
“I think you’re the perfect mix of everything I’ve wanted in my life.”
His eyes were searching hers after she said the words, but he held silent.
She didn’t know if she pushed too fast. Maybe hitting the gas wasn’t such a good thing.