Epilogue
In loving memory of
Maverick Justinian Constance
Protector. Friend. Professional eye-roller.
It was today, one year ago, that Dorran lost Jayce, and I lost Mave. The two of us have been taking things slow, and even though it hasn’t been an easy process, we’re doing our best with it.
I look ahead, squinting against the sunlight, and see that Dorran, Varsha, Alex, and Solo have knelt around Jayce’s grave. Dor and Solo seem somber, but Alex and Varsha – they appear completely crestfallen.
Burying Jayce with his family was not an option, since he’d cut ties with them years ago. And, because Mave didn’t have a family of his own, him and Jayce were put to rest a few feet from each other.
I sniff again and smile down at the gravestone.
“Remember that construction guy I’ve been telling you about?
” I chuckle, then flick a tiny piece of rubble with my forefinger.
“I asked him to fix the countertop yesterday because it didn’t look the way I wanted it to, and when I turned around, I swear I heard him call me a menace.
” I laugh, but it turns into a sob. “Fuck, I miss you, Mave.” I close my eyes and will for the tears to stop, but they don’t.
And when a soft, feather-light breeze touches my wet cheek – almost like a caress – I suck in a breath and open my eyes.
A chill runs through my very bones, leaving me stunned.
After my dad’s death became old news last year, and Roman was named the new Administrator, Dorran and I decided to leave Riverside.
Living in the city where we lost all but everything wasn’t doing wonders for either of us, so I sold both the Adler estates, and Dorran sold Finesse, and we moved to Anaheim, California.
And, because Dorran has reopened Finesse in Anaheim, Varsha and Alex have joined us.
When I started my YouTube channel just a couple of months ago – dedicating it solely to fashion – I wasn’t expecting it to reach an audience so quickly, but it surprisingly has.
I continue to gain more and more traction with each video I upload, bringing me one step closer to my ultimate goal of turning myself into a well-known name in the industry before I can start a brand of my own.
Getting there will take a while – lots of setups and milestones and competition – but I’m determined, and I believe in myself, so I should be fine.
“Cigs?”
I wipe the tears and snot off my face, then look up. “Alex, hey.”
He gives me a small, forlorn smile. “You ready to head out? I kinda wanna leave.” His voice cracks, so he blinks and clears his throat.
I get to my feet and dust the mud off my hands and jeans, returning his smile with an understanding one of my own. “Sure, yeah.”
He glances at Mave’s grave, then brings his gaze to mine. “You okay?”
I push a few errand strands of hair behind my ears. “I think so.” I shrug. “Honestly, it’s not an answer I’ve perfected yet, because the question kind of makes me want to scream.”
He clicks his tongue. “Fair enough.”
“And you?”
He lifts a shoulder and slides his hands into the pockets of his trousers. “I have to be, right? It’s how it’s supposed to be, after all.”
“Not necessarily, no.” I notice that his eyes have misted over, so I erase the distance between us and pull him into a hug. “I love you, Alex, and I need you to know that you don’t have to be strong if you don’t want to be.”
He hugs me back and sighs against the side of my neck. “There are days when I feel like I am – strong, I mean. But then there are days when I can’t stand his absence. I go mad, and then I just feel…”
“Numb,” I provide, then move back to look at him.
“Yeah.”
“I wanna say it’s all part of the healing process, but you and I both know that’s bullshit. Whatever we’re experiencing, it just is, and it’s fucking tough. Exhausting, even”
“I’d probably knee you in the gut if you said that anyway,” Alex remarks, and I can’t help but laugh at his comment.
Dorran and I’s condo is currently under construction, so we’ve been crashing at the one Varsha and Alex are sharing.
There are nights where we reminisce about some of our good memories with Jayce and Mave, and then there are those where we drink ourselves to the point where we don’t feel anything at all.
Alex once again clears his throat, then jerks his head to the right. “The others have left, it seems. We should go as well.”
I look to the side, and notice that Dorran and the others have indeed left.
I nod at Alex. “You go on ahead; I’ll meet you guys in the parking lot.”
“You sure?”
I nod again. “Yup.”
He gives my arm a quick squeeze, looks at Jayce’s grave one last time, then starts walking out of the cemetery.
Once he’s gone, I make my way to Jayce, pull another rose out from the back pocket of my jeans, and place it below the gravestone.
“He hates it when I fuss over him,” I say, referring to Dorran, “but I am taking care of him, I promise. Of all 3 of them.” I step back and glance between Mave and Jayce, and then, with a slow exhale, I turn around and head towards the parking lot.
Solo and Dorran are having a conversation when I reach my Cadillac, whereas Alex and Varsha are standing next to Jayce’s Jeep, which Alex now drives.
“You kids sure you don’t wanna stay a while and have a few drinks with me?” Solo asks.
Dorran shakes his head. “We should get going, but the next time we’re here, we’ll stay for a round.”
Solo ruffles his curls, then gives him a one-armed hug. “I’ll take your word for it.” He comes around and embraces the rest of us, then gets in his SUV before driving out of the parking lot.
Dorran walks over to me, then runs his long, calloused fingers over the front of my Cadillac. “To think, it all started because of this car,” he tells me.
I blink at him. “Huh?”
He looks at me, then chuckles when he sees my confusion. “We met because you brought your Cadillac to Finesse over a year ago,” he says, and shifts closer to me. “I knew I was done for the moment I saw you, and I was so pissed you were with Gavin, of all people.”
I laugh a little, and he does the same. “I’m glad he suggested we go to your garage, though. That’s the one good thing he did, if nothing else.”
He seems contemplative for a moment, but then he just smiles.
“True.” The sunlight has reached its peak, and makes his midnight-blue eyes appear all but violet.
He’s a bit flushed from it, too, and the scar on his right cheek – now faded yet still visible – stands out against his complexion, making him look so fucking stunning that I wish I could stop time and just… admire him for a while.
“Hey.” He tilts his head to the side. “You okay, sweetheart?”
I swallow and straighten a little. “Yeah.” Cupping the side of his face, I rise on my tiptoes and press my lips to his. “You ready to go home?” I ask him.
He grins, and it’s such an effortless gesture that it pulls at my eager heartstrings. “Yeah, let’s go home,” he answers, then kisses me.
Hardships are a part of life. They shape a person, teach them lessons nothing and no one ever can.
Every hurdle, downfall, and loss have their value, and only when you’ve experienced it all, do you realize how precious, and priceless, life is.
Some get to live it to the fullest, while some don’t, so make sure to spend your time loving those who love you, disregarding those who envy you, and forgiving those who have hurt you.
Remember: the only way for you is up, because darling, for you, even the sky is not the limit.
THE END.