Chapter 42 #2
Nodding quietly, I retake my seat. Feeling eyes on me, I notice Seth watching us with a curious expression on his face. His eyes shift to Kash’s but then quickly lower to his plate. The feeling of unease tightens in my gut.
After the meal, the guys stay in the kitchen to clean dishes. I offer to help, but Emma ushers me and Noah out to the living room. She serves us a slice of pie into a bowl with ice cream.
“Everything was delicious, Emma. Thank you again for having us.”
“Of course, Cora. I love having you and Noah here. Atlas seems very happy.”
Shifting uneasily, I nod. Atlas seems happy, but I can’t shake the feeling that something is wrong. Maybe it’s just me, but my instincts are telling me to stay alert, but for what?
Noah falls asleep on the couch shortly after finishing his pie.
Taking in his sleeping form, I think about how much he’s grown this past year.
It makes me wonder if it’ll always be this good between us.
Atlas told me what a shit he was as a teenager, and I think most of that was due to his environment.
I’ve been so grateful to have the support system I do with the Morgans, and now Atlas, that I think he’ll be okay.
“I’m going to run some food over to the neighbors real quick,” Emma interrupts my thoughts, putting her coat on. “They’re an older couple; kids never visit. Assholes.” She scoffs. “Be right back.”
After she leaves, I grab the bowls Noah and I were using and take them to the kitchen. Maybe the guys will let me help put stuff away at least. I hate feeling like I’m not helping.
Walking back toward the kitchen, I hear their raised voices. Atlas and Seth’s voices seem louder, as if they’re arguing.
“What the hell are you going on about?” Atlas barks loudly.
“You know exactly what I’m talking about, Atlas,” Seth retorts.
“No, actually I don’t, so why don’t you explain it?”
“Just leave it alone, Seth.” I think it’s Rhett’s voice.
“No. If he has something to say, he can say it.”
“Fine. I’ll be the bad guy since none of you want to say anything,” Seth starts. “It’s about Cora.” My heart freezes in my chest. Me? What did I do?
“Watch how you fucking say her name.”
“It’s not like that,” I hear Kash cut in.
“You know we like her, but, man… What about Noah?” Seth continues.
“What about him?”
“It’s not just her you get, Atlas.”
“So?”
“So, are you his father now or something? You did a build a family?” Seth asks.
A shiver racks my spine as the silence echoes in the room. I hate myself for standing here, listening in on their conversation, but I’m completely frozen. This is what I was afraid of. Noah and I becoming a burden on someone else was not what I wanted.
If I thought my heart was breaking before, it shatters when I hear Atlas’ cold voice respond. “No, I’m not his fucking father.”
“Well, no shit, dummy, but…” I tune out the rest of what they say.
Turning on my heel, I don’t stay to hear the rest of it.
Heading back to the living room as quietly as I can, I set the bowls back onto the coffee table.
Wiping away the tears gathering in my eyes, I grab my coat and shoes.
I have to get out of here. Fortunately, my keys are on the chair with my purse.
Quietly, I put Noah’s coat around his shoulders and pick him up. Shuffling toward the door, I see Emma coming through at the same time I open it.
“Oh, hey!” she greets, pulling off her coat. “Are you guys leaving already?”
“Yeah.” I give her what I hope looks like a normal smile. I’m suddenly grateful Atlas doesn’t know where the Morgans live.
“I’m so glad you guys came. Where’s Atlas? Isn’t he riding over with you?”
“Oh no, he’ll meet me there soon. They wanted to chat a bit longer.” I shrug.
Nodding her head, Emma holds the door open for me to pass. “Figures. Those boys are always together. It’s like they’re a crazy unit,” she explains. “Always looking out for each other.”
I want to laugh at the irony. She doesn’t know the half of it. I know where this is going to leave us, but I can’t stay here and think about it.
“Thank you again, Emma. Goodnight,” Wishing things were different, I strap a still-sleeping Noah into the car. “You’ve been so kind to us.” I smile at her one last time.
“Don’t be a stranger, Cora.” She hugs me tightly. I glance at the house in panic, hoping I can get out of here before any of them realize I’m gone. Nodding at her, I pull back and climb into my car, backing out of the driveway.
I keep the tears at bay until I’m a few miles down the road. Pulling over for a moment, I let them fall freely. Noah sleeps in the back seat and does not know that my world has just fallen apart. Pain I didn’t know was possible radiates from my chest.
Taking a deep, shuddering breath, I will myself to pull it together. I have to be strong for Noah. I don’t know how I’ll explain Atlas’ absence from our lives, but I’ll think of something. I always do. Pulling away from the curb, I head to the Morgans’ house.
Wiping away one final tear, I promise myself that I won’t do this again. I thought Atlas was different, but as it turns out, he’s not. I can’t blame him, though. Noah and I are a package deal. I’ve never pretended otherwise, and he seemed okay with it.
I’ll be fine, eventually. It’s always been me and Noah after all. All good things must come to an end, right?