Epilogue II
ONE YEAR LATER...
It wasn’t enough for the ship to sink and kill thousands or for Jack to freeze to death saving his beloved Rose. *Nearer, My God, to Thee* had to play with violins in the background. Sure, let’s crank up the emotion even more! As if *My Heart Will Go On* wasn’t enough on its own.
And that selfish bitch Rose had to hog the whole damn door for herself!
I sniffed quietly.
It was useless. I could watch *Titanic* a thousand times—even on mute—and I’d still cry myself dehydrated every single time.
“You’re not crying, are you?”
“Of course not!”
I was glad my voice came out steady and clear, even with the knot tightening in my throat and my eyes burning.
But Thor knew me better than that. He shifted behind me, and a soft Kleenex square appeared in front of my face.
His whisper brushed my ear.
“Cry all you want, baby. I’ve got you.”
I shivered at the warmth of his breath and the gentle graze of his lips against my skin, sending goose bumps racing through me. His low, resonant, deep voice moved through my body.
Some things never changed.
One year later, and he still affected me like crazy.
“They both could’ve fit on that door,” he said.
I smiled at the indignant note in his tone.
“Yeah, they could’ve.”
“I would’ve given you the whole door too.”
“I would’ve pulled you up with me.”
“Probably would’ve climbed on top of me to keep us warm, too.”
“Wow, you’re such a romantic,” I grumbled, fighting a laugh. “And I seriously doubt you could’ve kept an erection in that freezing water.”
“You could always use your mouth.”
“Idiot.”
I wiped my eyes and blew my nose.
The heavenly comfort of his arms tightened around me, his hand resting on my belly while his fingers traced lazy patterns on my skin. I was sitting between his legs, my back against his chest, the hair on his legs brushing softly against mine whenever we moved.
I loved being like this with my husband—enjoying a nice afternoon movie on the couch.
Especially because these moments had become almost rare for us.
Being alone, without the kids popping up or yelling around us.
Or being too tired for anything deeper than a quick kiss.
Not that we didn’t try. God knew we made time to date each other and surprise one another whenever we could.
But when you have kids, those moments become a luxury. Kids demand your full attention.
Groundbreaking discovery!
We were in Hawaii. Thor had taken a week off, and I’d used my overdue vacation time.
We decided to spend the winter here. It would be good for us to be together and for the kids to get familiar with our annual vacation spot.
Even though Valentina was only one and Lucca was about to turn four.
Which reminded me—we’d be celebrating his birthday right here in two days.
Valentina, our little diva as we called her, had miraculously fallen asleep without a fuss. From where we sat, we could see Lucca playing distractedly on the back porch.
I turned my gaze back to the screen.
Old Rose closed her eyes, fulfilling the promise Jack had made her.
My heart swelled with emotion at the final scene. A smile tugged at my lips over the couple’s reunion. Rose and Jack, fictional or not, would be eternal.
The final credits rolled across the screen.
I took a deep breath and pulled myself together, wiping away the tears.
Thor slipped a hand under my chin and turned my face up to his. His eyes locked on mine. He lowered his head and kissed me, long and deep.
“We’ll live long enough to meet our grandkids, and then we’ll go together—because I wouldn’t want to live in a world where you don’t exist.”
Wow. So I wasn’t the only one feeling emotional, huh?
“Me neither, love,” I whispered against his lips.
“I love you.”
“I love you more.”
He pulled back, grinning playfully.
“I’m still gonna see you with white hair and all wrinkly.” I gave his arm a light smack and he laughed harder. “I know I’ll be bald and with a beer belly.”
“Not the beer belly.”
“No?”
“I’ll take bald. No beer belly.”
He let out a short laugh, running his thumb along my jawline.
“For better or for worse, right?”
“But nobody said anything about a beer belly.”
He gave me a mock glare.
“Ungrateful woman.”
I giggled and leaned up to kiss him.
“Mamma! Mamma!”
I straightened up as Lucca came racing toward us. I narrowed my eyes, curious about his urgency and the bright, excited look on his face—like he’d discovered the eighth wonder of the world—when he stopped in front of us.
“What’s up, little lion?”
“My pee-pee’s hard.” He pulled down his blue shorts and little underwear, proudly showing me his erection. “Look.”
All the blood drained from my face.
“Oh…”
Behind me, I felt Thor’s abs shake with suppressed laughter as I stared at my baby boy, trying not to let my shock show.
I was not prepared for this right now.
Lucca was completely focused on his penis, pulling it as far as it would go, then laughing and starting to wiggle his hips. He never took his eyes off it.
The kid looked like he’d found the toy of the century.
“Put it away, Mamma… it’s really hard.”
“Uh… that’s… um… cool.”
What the hell else was I supposed to say? *How nice*?
*Dear God, that’s my son’s penis!*
Lucca stopped wiggling. His expression shifted to deep concentration, like something had just occurred to him.
It gave me a second to pull myself together.
Thor, the jerk, kept quietly laughing at my expense.
I shot him a dirty look before turning back to my curious little boy.
I knew the best thing was to handle this naturally.
Lucca tugged his shorts down farther and cupped his balls, weighing them in his little hand, checking them from different angles. Then he stretched his penis again.
I held still, unsure whether to pull his hands away or tell him to stop before he hurt himself.
I didn’t move or say a word.
Paralyzed.
“It doesn’t have hair.”
His gaze lifted to me. Not to his dad—to me.
“Why does Papa’s pee-pee have hair and is bigger than mine?”
I took a deep breath and sat up straighter, trying not to have a mini heart attack.
I knew the questions would come, but I’d thought—hoped—they’d wait until he was eighteen, when I could just say, *Kid, meet Google*.
Lucca clearly had other plans.
*Jesus Christ, I can’t believe I’m having this conversation.*
“That’s because Papa is bigger, and soon you’ll be just as big as him. Or bigger.”
His little eyes sparkled with excitement.
“Oh! Did you hear that, Papà? I’m gonna have a big one!”
Lucca strutted off proudly, still tugging on it like it was a rubber band, testing its limits.
I didn’t know what to think. It was funny and oddly endearing, at the very least, the way he treated his penis like it was a separate toy.
Maybe if I had one, I’d think it was the coolest thing in the world too.
Thor finally let his laughter roll out freely.
“I told you the nurses were staring.”
“That’s not funny, you clown.”
“Look on the bright side, baby—he didn’t ask why it’s hard.”
I barely had time to process his words before Lucca appeared in front of me again, forehead wrinkled, as if Thor’s comment had summoned him.
“Mamma?”
*Oh, God…*
I forced a smile.
At least he’d pulled his shorts back up.
“What is it, little lion?”
“Why is it hard?”
*Save me, God!*
I felt heat crawl up my neck.
Did he really need to ask so many questions?
Lucca looked genuinely interested in the answer. I waited for Thor to step in with some father-son wisdom. The bastard didn’t even blink while Lucca stared at me expectantly.
I cleared my throat and spoke in a steady voice.
“Well, it’s a natural reaction your body has when you’re really happy. But, Lucca, honey, you shouldn’t show it or touch it in public, or in front of other people. That’s something private. Something that’s just yours, and you play with it alone, without any objects. Understand?”
His head bobbed up and down.
I reached out and pulled him between my legs. Lucca leaned against my right thigh so he could see both me and his father.
“Private means something you do by yourself, like Mommy already explained about going to the bathroom to pee and poop. No one should touch your private parts, okay? If anyone does, you tell Mommy and Papa right away, got it?”
“Got it.”
I breathed out.
“Good. What now?” I asked, curious, when his expression stayed tight and his little fingers poked at my thigh.
He hesitated, then looked up at me from under his long, dark lashes.
“Mamma doesn’t have a pee-pee,” he said, suspicious.
I thought I heard Thor mutter *thank God*, but I ignored it.
“No, I don’t.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m a girl, and girls don’t have pee-pees.”
His face went from shocked to horrified… and then teary.
“They cut yours off!” he exclaimed, mouth hanging open, eyes wide with alarm.
Thor burst out laughing. Lucca jumped, staring at his father in confusion at the stupid reaction. I swear, I wanted to punch Thor.
“You’re not helping,” I growled at him.
“It’s okay, sweetheart. Papa just remembered something funny, all right? Mamma doesn’t have a pee-pee, because girls have a vulva,” Thor said after a brief hesitation.
*A vulva?*
Weren’t we supposed to use the proper words?
I’d have to talk to Pietra about this later. She had her degree and was better informed than I was. She could give me some guidance.
“Valentina too?”
“Your sister too,” I confirmed.
“No pee-pee’s gonna grow on her?”
“No, sweetheart. All girls have vulvas and boys have pee-pees,” I explained, hoping—praying—it would be enough.
His silence lasted a beat, long enough for him to forget about girls’ vulvas and refocus on his own equipment.
Lucca turned his attention to Thor, eyes narrowed.
“Papa’s pee-pee gets hard too?”
It took everything I had not to laugh.
“Ask him,” I encouraged.
Lucca kept staring at his father, waiting eagerly for him to share the big secret.
*Served him right.*
“Yes, buddy. Papa’s pee-pee gets hard too… sometimes,” he said, before standing up and offering his hand to our son. “Come on, champ. Let’s get some ice cream while we talk man to man.”
Lucca took his father’s hand, and the two of them headed off to the kitchen.