CHAPTER 27
Miguel
A quiet knock on the door pulled Miguel from the stack of tax forms littering his desk. He lifted his gaze as the crack widened. The nerves in his gut churned with each new inch.
It’s time to end this. For good.
“Miguel?”
Her sweet voice dissipated the brain fog swirling in his head. Her soft summons was an instant weight lifting from his heart.
“Lauren.” With a smile, he stood and waved her inside the small office at Pier Ninety-Two.
She giggled. “Am I interrupting anything important?” Pointing at the pile of yellow carbon copies to her right, her eyes widened.
“Unless you consider insurance forms an essential part of employment.” Miguel snorted. “No, nothing important. Besides, I invited you.”
Her familiar laughter filled the office. Moving closer to wrap her arms around him, Lauren squeezed. “My God, I don’t miss those forms!”
“Or food service licenses, health permits, or liquor licenses.” He grumbled but returned her embrace and touched his nose to the top of her head, inhaling a fragrant field of wildflowers.
“And the list goes on!” Grinning from ear-to-ear, she stepped back and took in her surroundings. Her line of sight stalled on the framed photo beside his phone—an image of the two of them standing in front of the original Pier Ninety-Two its opening year. She scooped it and dragged a finger over the glass.
“Do you miss it?”
Lauren snorted and returned the photo to its home. “I miss the old crew. You know, people like you. But not the actual work, or the forms, or the staffing, or the—”
“And the list goes on,” he repeated.
She nodded. “The list will always go on, Miguel.” Lauren perched herself on the edge of his desk and pointed toward his seat. “Sit.”
Okay...
Miguel dropped into the chair with a sigh. The wheels slid against the thin layer of carpet and hit a snag, halting any further movement, and Miguel, a sudden prisoner beneath her stare.
“How are you?” she asked.
Her question plagued him. The reality of the truth swirled in his soul. Miguel shook his head and picked at a piece of lint on his khaki shorts. “I’m fine—”
Lauren leaned forward and swatted him on the knee. “No, you’re not. How could you be?”
With a return eye roll, he groaned. “Lauren.”
“Don’t Lauren me. I see right through you.”
A groan escaped him. Making a full spin in his seat, Miguel lifted his hands and cupped his cheeks. Heat touched his palms as the silence echoed.
This is not why I invited you over here.
“Have you talked to her?” Lauren whispered.
“Not since last weekend.” He shrugged. “I’m not really sure what to say to her.”
Yet.
She frowned. “Well, only everything.”
The dreams haunting his psyche returned. Colorful and vibrant, every fantasy held captive in his mind of Rachel replayed before his eyes, her sunshine, eternal.
“Miguel, you have to call her. And talk about what happened with Ian.”
The roar in his ears intensified with each heartbeat and Rose’s words from the evening before echoed in his ears. “I guess it’s not about Ian. At least... not really anymore.”
She leaned forward and crossed her arms. “Then what is it about?”
You.
Miguel cleared his throat and dropped his gaze to the floor. Here it goes... But like a stalled car on the highway, the words in his heart stilled, frozen solid with each passing second. Years of friendship looked back in her eyes, reflecting with the glimmer of hope he’d held tight in his heart for too long.
“What’s it about, then?” she prodded.
His chest ached with plummeting confidence. “I don’t really know how to tell you.”
“Why?” Her sandaled toe nudged him. “Miguel. Come on. It’s just me.”
“That’s just it, Lauren. It’s you.” Sucking in a deep breath, he peered at the slowly sinking smile on her red, glossy lips.
“I don’t understand.”
“I wouldn’t expect you to.”
“Miguel, did I do something—”
He shook his head. “No, it’s something I did.”
“What?”
“I fell in love with you.” The words blurted from his lips in an avalanche, overdue for a lifetime. The air caught tight in his throat as a soft buzz hummed in his ears.
Her eyes widened. Her body froze. And pink tinted her cheeks, deepening as the new information settled between them.
“I fell for you,” Miguel continued. God, that feels so good to finally admit. “I fell in love with you, Lauren. I’ve never said the words out loud, but I... I’ve always felt like you’ve known.”
Lauren swallowed but slowly nodded her head. Her eyes lifted to his, her deep-brown stare glossing over with a layer of tears.
“I could never help it.” He snickered with the free-flowing truth. Like a weight lifting from his soul, the deep ache squeezing his heart disappeared. “I knew I could never have you, but it didn’t matter. I couldn’t help what I felt.”
“Miguel,” she whispered and covered her eyes with her palms. “I’m so—”
“Don’t be sorry.” He grinned and spun in another circle. “You hired me to wait tables and wash dishes. You didn’t ask for anything more.”
A sob escaped her. “But you were always more.”
Tingling with the shivers racing along his spine, Miguel shrugged. “Always more, but never enough.”
Her breath hitched with a sniffle.
“And none of it is your fault. It’s one hundred percent mine.”
The tears slid down her cheeks and disappeared into her cotton t-shirt. “There was a moment—”
I remember it. I remember every detail. That one night...
“I know. But that’s all it’ll ever be. Just a moment.” His voice quivered as he stood with shaking knees and opened his arms.
Lauren fell into him, her quivering body cold against his warm skin. She sniffled again before wiping the tears beneath her eyes.
“I’ve been hanging on to that moment for far too long,” he whispered in her ear. “I didn’t fully realize it until just recently.”
“Because of Rachel,” she muttered against his chest.
Raquel.
He nodded and smoothed her hair away from her damp cheeks. “I have to let you go, boss. For both our sakes.”
Another sob broke through the silence of the office. Lauren shivered beneath his embrace, squeezing his middle tighter as the seconds passed.
As his heartbeat raced, his pulse quickened with adrenaline at the momentous realization.
I have to let you go.
Lauren pulled away, taking with her the layers of love that had encircled his heart since the day he first stepped foot into Pier Ninety-Two.
“I’m sorry,” he mumbled.
Drawing in a deep breath, her gaze lifted to his. “Don’t be, Miguel Rodriquez. You deserve to find love just as much as anyone else.”
That’s just it. I’ve found it already. The question is how do I get it back?
He nodded as a grin tugged at the right corner of his mouth.
Lauren swiped beneath her eyes and reached for a tissue on the corner of his desk.
His line of sight followed her fingers, right to the silently ringing phone serving as a paperweight. Rachel’s name lit up the screen.
“Lauren, I have to get her back,” he whispered.
She leaned to her side and picked up the phone. Holding the device in the palm of her hand, Lauren nodded. Her eyelids fluttered as the final tear kissed her cheek. “Then it would seem...” she whispered as she eyed the new email notification with a smirk. “You have a concert to get to.”
The phone dropped into his outstretched hand. Leaning in, Lauren pressed a kiss on his cheek. “Goodbye, Miguel.”
Goodbye, Lauren.
She disappeared out the door, taking with her the memories, the hurt, the heartache, and the love.
“Goodbye.”
*
Miguel gripped the steering wheel and groaned. “Come on! Move!” he yelled as a sea of red brake lights littered the highway. “I. Can’t. Be. Stuck. In. Traffic. Right. Now!” Each word punctuated the air, a reminder of the seconds ticking by as time slipped away.
He tapped replay on her voicemail for the twentieth time and Rachel’s sweet voice filled the cabin again.
Miguel. Miguel Rodriguez, I love you. I know I have no right to say that to you anymore, but it’s the sincere truth. For the last week, all I’ve been able to think about is you. Your laugh. Your smile. Your flan. But more than anything, I keep thinking about your heart. And how I broke it with the foul words I spoke. I accused you of something unfair when what I should have done was apologize to you for the way I behaved. We’re at the concert. There’s a million people here. But the single person I want to see is you. I’m going to transfer back your ticket and just hope—You’re my only one, Miguel. Please come.
“I’m coming, Sunshine,” he whispered and stuck his head out of the window to peer at the line of traffic. But the brake lights didn’t give in. “Damn it!” he roared and toyed with the idea of calling her once more.
How can I fix this over the phone though?
“Ugh!” he yelled and released the brake to inch forward another foot. Miguel swallowed the building emotions—angst over the traffic, sorrow over saying goodbye to Lauren, but more than anything, the anticipation of holding Rachel in his arms once more.
Her sweet smile erupted in his mind and stole his heart all over again. The feel of her soft skin warming against his own sent a tingle racing down his spine. Miguel gripped his phone and groaned. “I have to find another route. I’ll never get there this way,” he muttered and tapped on the Maps app.
His fingers flew across the screen, his eyes intent on any possible new route available into Inglewood.
“Starting route to the YouTube Theater.” The feminine voice filled the car and Miguel gripped the steering wheel and merged onto the off-ramp. He forced his foot against the gas pedal and zipped forward.
A sheen of sweat coated his forehead as the late afternoon sun sank in the sky. Miguel dragged a hand through the dampness and groaned. Reaching into the back seat, his fingers blindly explored in search of a cloth—a towel—a rag— “A goat?” With a wild snort, he grabbed hold of Ryan the stuffed goat and squeezed.
“Well, Ryan, if you’re not a sign, I don’t know what is.”
Flooring the gas once more, Miguel zigged and zagged through neighborhoods and alleys, parking lots and gravel paths. “Come on,” he pleaded as the sun sank entirely and the miles slowly slid away. “I’m coming, Rach,” he whispered. “Just hold on...”
His tires finally screeched into an empty parking space outside the theater. After slamming the door closed, Miguel stuffed Ryan beneath his arm and dashed toward the security lines at full speed. The wind whipped through his hair and cooled his heated skin.
“Where the fuck do I get in?” he murmured and eyed the mobs of concertgoers milling around.
The signature sounds of Yellowcard’s violin echoed through the breeze. Each twang of the bow called him forward. “Where the—”
“Nice goat, dude. But ah... you can’t bring that in there.”
Miguel turned and came nose to nose with a balding man. Emblazoned across his black t-shirt, the word security stuck out in bold, yellow lettering.
But I have to.
Miguel shook his head and stuffed his hand in his pants pocket. He pulled out his phone and navigated to the single ticket. “Is there any exception?” he pleaded, internally laughing at the ridiculous question on the tip of his tongue.
“Clear bag policy.” The man shrugged and tilted his head. “What the hell do you have a goat for?”
A shiver zipped through him, sending goosebumps down his arms. “I don’t even know how to explain this.” Miguel snorted. “My girlfriend is in there. Er, ex-girlfriend.” Wait, no... He shook his head. “The woman I love is in there. And I would do just about anything to win her back right now. Including making a total fool of myself.” Raising the goat to the man’s eye level, he groaned. “I’m begging you, man.”
His big, bulky hands gripped the goat around the middle and squeezed. A bark of laughter rang through the night as he pointed inside. “Good luck, dude.”
“Thank you!” Miguel called over his shoulder and raced forward. Dodging the long lines at the concession stands, he wildly searched the amphitheater.
“Section 102,” he muttered and sidestepped a woman balancing three beers in her hands. “Section 102,” he repeated again. “Excuse me! Excuse me!” Miguel slithered through the crowd until his foot reached the first stair.
He counted in his head twenty-three rows up. Tess’s blonde curls caught his eye first, the scowl on her face bringing a smile to his lips. Tucking Ryan snuggly beneath his arm, he climbed the first ten steps with battered breath.
I’m coming, Sunshine. Thirteen more...
His legs protested the steep incline. Adrenaline fueled him as his gaze reached the non-stuffed Ryan belting out the lyrics with a beer in hand to Yellowcard’s hit song, “Only One.”
His feet stumbled up six more stairs. With his heartbeat banging wildly in his chest, the bass of the tune reverberated throughout his full body.
Seven more...
Cole wrapped his arm around Rose’s waist. Screaming the lyrics along with Ryan, he tugged her closer, and her eye caught his.
She winked and Miguel climbed the last few stairs.
The music roared. The lights blared. The crowd screamed. But the theater stilled as Rachel turned, her gaze locking with his just five seats away.
Tripping over the toes of Tess, Ryan, Cole, and Rose, Miguel stumbled past them all until he dropped the goat into her outstretched arms. And with all the love in his heart, his lips parted and sang the lyrics of their love.
“You are my only one.”
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THE END