Chapter 16 Rory
RORY
Rory blearily opened her eyes and squinted at the large TV in her living room. The credits of the film they had been watching scrolled up the screen. She looked around for Gemma and simultaneously rejoiced and groaned. Gemma was fast asleep in her lap, and it felt wonderful.
After the semi-disastrous trip to the shopping centre that afternoon, they had returned to Rory’s house for a takeaway and a movie.
Rory had known it had been fatal to settle on the sofa together with a bottle of wine after they had eaten but was powerless to resist anything that meant she got to spend time with Gemma.
After the heat of the day, Gemma had been chilly in her shorts and vest top and so it had been natural for them to pull a light blanket over their legs as they watched the film.
Rory had noticed Gemma’s head nodding a few times during the film but, rather than suggest she make her way home, Rory had put a cushion on her lap and invited Gemma to lie down for a few minutes.
Rory blinked at the clock on the wall and realised that had been over an hour ago.
She rubbed her stiff neck and wondered what to do.
While it was lovely to have Gemma asleep on her lap, she couldn’t sleep here all night. Rory gently woke her friend up.
“Hmm.” Gemma sat up and looked deliciously befuddled. Rory felt an almost overwhelming urge to pull her towards her and kiss her gently. With a sigh, she pushed that thought from her mind.
“Hey, I think we both fell asleep during the film.” Rory kept her voice low as she knew her friend was always groggy when she woke up.
“Hmm, yeah.” Gemma looked adorably dazed, and Rory bit back a grin at her friend’s confused state.
“I’d better head home. It’s about an hour on the tube.” Gemma made no effort to get up from the sofa. Rory frowned at the idea of Gemma travelling across London on her own this late on a Saturday night.
“You could stay here?” Rory tried to sound light over the pounding of her heart in her chest.
“Mm-kay.” Gemma pulled the blanket around her and slumped back onto Rory’s lap.
“Not literally here.” Rory sighed and ran her fingers through Gemma’s long hair. Unlike her own reaction when Gemma had done the same thing to her, Gemma moaned in pleasure as Rory’s fingers trailed through the silky strands.
Reluctantly, Rory eased them off the sofa and pushed Gemma towards the stairs. After checking all the doors were locked, Rory climbed the stairs to find Gemma sitting on the end of her bed.
A lump took up residence in Rory’s throat as she looked at Gemma in her bedroom. Since Darcy, there had been no one else in her house, let alone her bed. Gemma’s sleepy eyes met hers.
“The guest bed has no bedding on it.” She shrugged, and Rory cursed.
She had stripped the bed earlier before their shopping trip, intending to remake it when she got home.
Her grumpiness about the shopping trip, and subsequent takeaway and movie, had driven it from her mind.
She tried to swallow through the lump in her throat but found her mouth was suddenly dry.
She tried to form words but found that none were forthcoming.
This was ridiculous. She made her living by having the right argument at the right time, by knowing when and how to pressure clients and adversaries.
But it seemed that all that was needed to rob her of rational thought and speech was a sleepy woman looking delightfully dishevelled while sitting on her bed.
“Yeah, I meant to do that.” Rory mentally slapped herself. Was that the best she could come up with? “I can grab the bedding and do it now?” Rory offered with not much enthusiasm. She swallowed again.
“Don’t worry, I can bunk in with you” Gemma’s eyes were drooping, and her body slumped with fatigue.
Rory finally found the capacity to move her body forward and pull the duvet back for Gemma.
She eased her friend’s body back into the bed, but just as Gemma’s head was about to hit the pillow, her eyes snapped open.
“Oh, I don’t have anything to sleep in.”
Rory deftly spun around and opened a drawer of T-shirts.
She grabbed the top one and thrust it toward Gemma.
Wordlessly, she grabbed her own vest top and shorts from under her pillow and marched towards her bathroom to get changed.
It had been enough for her system today to see Gemma in those short denim shorts, but to see her legs bare would be more than her equilibrium could stand.
Rory dithered in the bathroom and then chastised herself in the mirror.
Some butch lesbian you are turning out to be, she told herself.
Scared to go back into your own bedroom because there’s a woman in your bed.
But as she turned the lights out and stood in the doorway of her bedroom, she realised that this was not just any woman.
This was Gemma. Her friend, her former lover, although she really didn’t want to go down that train of thought too much.
She knew Gemma was rapidly becoming more than just a friend to her, and it was getting harder and harder every time they saw each other to keep her hands to herself.
She just wanted to pull Gemma towards her and hold her safe.
Then, there were moments like this afternoon when she had been upset at the shop.
All she could think of was burying her head in Gemma’s shoulder and letting the other woman hold and comfort her.
To hide in Gemma’s arms until the world was a little nicer to her.
She smiled and watched as Gemma snuggled into the pillow on her bed.
Gemma was always quick to fall asleep and hard to wake up.
She was obviously too warm as one leg was poking out of the covers.
After a few moments watching her friend sleep, Rory gently padded towards her side of the bed and slid under the covers.
The sheets were cool and inviting, and she sank into her bed with a gentle sigh.
She knew she wouldn’t be able to sleep with Gemma next to her but turned the light out anyway and lay on her back for a moment.
Today had been harder than she had realised.
Tears formed in her eyes as she gazed at the familiar pattern of her bedroom ceiling, and she blinked to clear her vision.
The outfit she had worn to the opera was something she had bought online.
She had only done it to spite Darcy, even in her absence.
Rory was drawn to the suit and wanted to wear it.
Perhaps that was what she should do in the future – buy things online and try them out in private before wearing more masculine clothes to the office and social events.
She sighed and screwed her eyes up. This was much harder than she thought it would be.
Being herself with Gemma was natural. The influencers Gemma had introduced her to had also made it all look easy.
But it was hard, and people like the woman she encountered in the changing rooms today made it even harder.
She sighed again and nearly jumped out of her skin when a hand touched her under the duvet.
“Turn your brain off and go to sleep.” Gemma’s voice was full of sleep, but there was a caring undertone to it. Rory patted the hand that was gently caressing her biceps before closing her eyes and following her friend into sleep.
Rory woke the next morning and resisted the temptation to roll over and pull Gemma into her arms. She padded downstairs and headed straight for the coffee machine.
Summer had well and truly arrived in the UK, and the temperatures were climbing, making the air warm in her kitchen.
She threw open the patio doors in the conservatory and made coffee.
She had just poured herself a mug of her beloved morning brew when she heard Gemma walking down the stairs.
Rory sniffed the coffee reverently and cast an eye towards her kitchen door.
Sure enough, Gemma appeared in the doorway, and Rory hid her smile behind her mug.
Gemma’s wild hair framed her head, and she drooped her eyelids low, as if trying to shield her eyes from the realities of being awake.
At some point, Gemma had found and put on one of Rory’s hoodies.
Rory tried to swallow, but her mouth and throat were suddenly dry at the sight of her friend in her clothes.
Gemma had pulled the arms over her hands and shuffled towards Rory.
Rory placed her coffee on the side and held her arms open for Gemma to walk into.
With a thud, Gemma flopped her head onto Rory’s shoulder and snuggled into her chest. Reflexively, Rory’s arms wrapped around her and squeezed her.
For a moment, Rory considered dropping a kiss to the top of Gemma’s head before remembering that they were friends, not girlfriends, and that the boundaries between them were of her own making.
For a split second, present-day Rory cursed past Rory and her foolish nobility.
“Coffee?” Rory asked the top of Gemma’s head. She tried to pull back to look at her friend’s face, but Gemma was too snuggled into Rory’s neck for that to be effective.
“Hmpfff.” Gemma burrowed her face into Rory’s neck.
Rory only had a vest top and shorts on, so Gemma’s breath was warm on her skin.
Gemma then wrapped her arms around Rory, and for a moment, all the noise of the world, her intrusive thoughts, even the thumping of her heart against her ribs, quieted as Gemma wrapped her in a hug that soothed every part of her.
Rory wanted the moment to last forever, but inevitably they needed to pull apart and face the day.
After Gemma sat at the kitchen table with her hands wrapped around a coffee mug, Rory got bread and cereal from her cupboards and started making breakfast for both of them.
She chuckled as Gemma reached for the Coco Pops, and passed her the milk.
It was only when her online order had arrived last week that she realised she’d added Gemma’s favourite cereal to her shopping.
Every morning, Gemma had started the day with the chocolatey cereal. She guessed not much had changed.
After a bowl of cereal and another mug of coffee, Gemma seemed to wake up enough to talk about the gyms they were visiting.
Between them, they had found several gyms that Rory thought she might like to try out and had chosen two to visit today.
She had been perfectly happy with the gym at the country club, but as Darcy was still a member there, she had quickly crossed that one off her list. The first one they decided to visit was based at an industrial estate near Rory’s house.
As soon as they arrived, Rory regretted it.
There was nothing inherently wrong with the gym, but she just couldn’t see herself working out there.
She shook hands with the man she’d arranged to meet, and he ushered them into the office.
“So, as I said on the phone, we’re looking for somewhere that we can both work out.” Gemma took the lead, and Rory was grateful to have her there.
“Sure. We have male and female changing areas.” Darren scribbled something on a clipboard.
“What are your aims for exercising?” Darren crossed one toned leg over the other and rested his ankle on his opposite knee.
He fixed his gaze on Gemma, and Rory resisted the urge to roll her eyes at his blatant perusal of her friend's curves.
“I want to tone up a bit and lose weight, and Rory wants to get into weight training.” Gemma sat forward and fixed him with a smile that Rory knew to be insincere, but Darren seemed to be transfixed by.
They had agreed that they wouldn’t initially mention that Rory was probably going to follow one of Jak’s programs, instead deciding to see what each gym would offer them.
After a few more questions where Darren focused on Gemma and ignored Rory, the three of them went for a tour so Darren could show off the facilities.
After looking at the machines and the free weight area, Gemma skipped off to look at the changing rooms. While she was gone, Darren fixed Rory with a look.
“So….” He looked around furtively. “Is she your girlfriend?”
For a brief moment, the word ‘no’ danced through Rory’s mind. Then, the looks that Darren had been giving Gemma since they had arrived flitted across her memory.
“Yes.” She had long since learned that sometimes, the shortest answers were the most unnerving, so she waited patiently and fixed Darren with a look that she hoped wouldn’t encourage any follow-up questions.
Fortunately, Gemma chose that moment to return from the changing rooms and, with a brief shake of the head to Rory, conveyed everything Rory needed to know.
She said a quick goodbye to Darren and quickly pulled Gemma out of the gym.
It wasn’t until she was opening the door to her car that she realised she had kept hold of Gemma’s hand long after it was necessary to make a point to Darren.
With a sigh, she flopped into the car and closed her eyes briefly before looking at Gemma.
“So….” Gemma laid a warm hand on Rory’s. “Let’s just forget this place ever existed and check out the next one on the list.”