70. Chapter Seventy
Leaning against the car, my arms folded over my chest, I watch Poppy enter the house, her bitch of a mother following behind. Despite the years that have passed, she still has a strong animosity towards me. I thought maybe she”d have chilled out a bit by now, but no, she still hates me and treats Poppy like crap.
I wanted to tell her to fuck off, but I held back. I didn”t want to interfere with Poppy and her mom. Plus, I”ve seen them clash in the past and I know Poppy won”t take any of her shit. She”s always been tough and resilient like that.
As I wait, contemplating what’s happening inside, my gaze shifts to the house two doors down. I can”t help but wonder if my old man is in there. He”s probably already at work, that’s if he still has a job. But the way he approached me last time I was in this shithole town and asked me for money makes me think he might be jobless. That’s his problem. I couldn’t give less of a shit about him or his fucked up life.
The house looks more run-down than I remember. Maybe the way I”m living now has made me see it as even more run-down than before.
In a split second, I snap my head back around as I hear the front door open, and there he is - the little boy I”ve only seen on the phone.
“Daddy! Daddy!” he yells with excitement as he bounds down the front steps.
My heart races when he calls me that. Powerful emotions swirl through me and it finally clicks. Poppy’s words make sense. I”ll do whatever it takes to protect my boy. I already love him, even though we”ve never met.
I step away from the car and approach him. Once I cross the gate, he jumps into my embrace, his little arms wrapping around my neck, holding on tightly until our cheeks are pressed together. I feel regret for all the moments I’ve missed with him, but I vow to never let that happen again. From now on, he and his mother are my entire world.
”You came back with Mom,” he says, leaning back a bit to look at me. I”m totally focusing on his face, checking out all the tiny details - he”s got my eyes, my nose, the same face shape, and his dark hair is the same shade as mine. He”s a spitting image of me, and I have the photo to back it up - the one my mom treasured by her bed.
Seeing him makes me feel all sorts of emotions I”ve never felt before. Tears form in my eyes as I cradle this tiny clone of myself in my arms.
“Can I see the pictures of the kangaroos?” he requests, his curiosity piqued. “And don’t forget the koalas too.”
“Sure,” I say. “Let’s go back out the gate first, and I’ll show you.” Carrying him, I step back through the gate, making sure not to draw any more attention than what had already transpired earlier, just in case Poppy’s mother notices me on her property.
When we reach the rental car, I gently sit him on the hood, letting his legs dangle down over the side.
I reach into my pocket for my phone and casually lean against the car, wrapping my arm around him to prevent him from falling. With just a couple of taps, I pull up the gallery of photos from our zoo trip.
As I hand him the phone, I watch him intently as he looks at the photos. He carefully studies the image and then, using his tiny fingers, he swipes to the next one, thoroughly inspecting each photo along the way. Then he pauses on a particular image - the one capturing Poppy with her radiant smile as she holds a handful of pellets, feeding a kangaroo. Out of all the photos I took of her during our trip, this one is my favorite.
He studies it for a few more moments, then looks up at me with a smile that is exactly like his mother’s. Seeing it brings warmth to my heart, knowing that he is a special mixture of both of us - a flawless combination of his parents.
“Did you feed them?” he asks.
“Yeah, we did.”
“Do they tickle when they eat?”
“No, but sometimes you can feel their slimy tongue on your palm.”
He screws up his face and then glances back at the photo. Using his fingers he zooms in as if trying to focus on what’s on Poppy’s hand. “What are those?” he asks.
“Pellets. They sell bags of pellets so you can feed the animals. There are these huge birds that look scary and are always there, waiting to be fed,” I tell him, as he looks up at me. “They look pretty weird, with their long necks.”
“Are they kind of like ostriches,” he asks.
I nod.
“They”re emus.”
“Yeah, that’s right,” I say, impressed by his extensive knowledge. Poppy had mentioned his deep love for animals, and it’s clear that his wealth of knowledge is truly remarkable. I am confident that he and Theo will hit it off effortlessly. Their mutual passion for animals is bound to forge a profound bond between them.
“Do you have any photos of the emus?”
“Yeah, there are some in there,” I reply.
He goes back to my phone and keeps swiping through more photos, asking more questions about the zoo.
We immediately raise our heads at the sound of the front door opening. Poppy walks down the front steps, holding a bag in her hand.
I carefully help Alex down off the hood of the car and move him onto the footpath.
“Hey Alex, don”t go near the road. Just stay here, okay? I’m going to help Mommy with the bag,” I tell him.
”Okay,” he says, not bothering to take his eyes off the screen.
Approaching Poppy, I can’t help but notice her red eyes, as if she has been crying. It breaks my heart to see her like this. After taking the bag from her, I gently lift her chin, urging her to look at me. As I scan her face, she forces a smile, but I’m not fooled. Something has happened in that house, something that has deeply upset the strongest person I know. It pains me to witness her in such a state.
“Oh,” she suddenly says, “I forgot to get Alex’s car seat.”
”I”ll handle it,” I reassure her, eager to take charge and shield her from the constant turmoil caused by her mother.
“Xander, it’s only going to bring more trouble.”
“I doubt getting our son”s car seat will make her hate me any more than she already does. Let me handle this, Poppy. You can trust me. I won’t cause any trouble. You don”t have to go through this alone anymore. Let me support you.”
She nods as if granting me permission to get the seat.
Taking her hand, I lead her out the front gate to Alex, who is still completely absorbed in the multitude of photos.
Once Poppy reaches Alex, she crouches down beside him.
“What are you looking at?” she asks, her arm wrapped around his waist as she leans in to see what has caught his eye. I watch their interaction for a brief moment, appreciating the way Poppy is with our son. It’s a connection, a bond, that I’m grateful to be a part of.
Heading to the car, I place Alex’s bag in the trunk next to ours. As Poppy entertains Alex with some photos on her phone, I walk back through the gate and make my way to her mother’s parked car in the driveway. I just wanna see if Alex”s seat is still in there. Even though Poppy is upset, I don”t really care if her mom calls the cops on me for stepping onto her lawn. I also don’t care if her mother’s car is unlocked. It won’t stop me from getting my son’s car seat out without her permission. I’ll just deal with the consequences when they arise.
As I near the vehicle, my gaze falls upon a child car seat through the rear window. I try to open the door, only to find it’s locked. My focus switches to the front door and I start making my way there. But then my attention suddenly changes when I see movement in the backyard.
As I make my way around the back of the house, I catch sight of Poppy’s mother in her garden. She’s wearing gloves, a large sunhat and diligently tending to her rose garden with clippers in hand. It”s so fucking frustrating how she can just act like her daughter hasn”t been out there, upset and crying.
I go through the side gate and head towards her. As I approach, she turns and I lock eyes with her fiery gaze. Her body tenses up and her lips get thinner. Despite the temptation to confront her, I resist the urge to speak my mind. I really want her to know about Poppy’s amazing musical skills, But, I quickly dismiss the idea, knowing deep down that it won’t make a difference. Her hatred for musicians and music is so strong, that no matter what I say, her opinion will remain unchanged.
Despite these intense urges, I restrain myself. It shouldn’t be up to me to tell her how amazing her daughter is. If she hasn’t realized it by now, she never will. Besides, I’m devoted to becoming a better man for both Poppy and my son. Rather than voicing any frustrations I may have had in the past, I opt to keep my thoughts to myself.
“We need to grab Alex’s car seat,” I say to her, trying my best to sound polite. All I want is to tell the raging bitch that her rude behavior will only bring her loneliness in the end.
She turns away from me as if I haven’t spoken.
I keep my eyes fixed on her as she walks towards the small wooden table positioned beneath the towering tree. While I wait for her to say something, my gaze sweeps across the yard, and a rush of memories floods my mind. My eyes then shift to the outdoor setting where Poppy and I have shared countless steamy moments. Every time it rained, I would take Poppy’s hand and ask her to dance for me. I loved watching her move in that sexy way, and it was fucking hot when she’d let herself embrace her sexuality. I make a mental note to get her to do it again the next time it rains. One of the guys can look after Alex. Suddenly, Poppy’s mother’s voice breaks through my memories.
“You know you’re no good for them,” she says, casually tossing her gloves onto the table.
“You”ve said that already, and thanks to you, I made the stupidest decision of my life. Your words won”t convince me to do that again.”
“You’ll break both their hearts because that’s what you do,” she declares with a sharpness in her voice as if she finds it difficult to engage with someone she views as inferior.
“You’re wrong. You were wrong before, and you”re still wrong. When I returned that morning, it was to tell her how much she meant to me, more than you would ever know.”
“And just because you have all that fame, you believe you’re any different. Deep down, you’ll always be insignificant. Sooner or later, she”ll realize she”s not good enough and you”ll find someone better.”
“I don”t give a fuck about your opinion. Poppy”s opinion is the one that counts. I”ve loved her for years, so no matter what you say, I know I deserve her. I’m not that stupid kid anymore, who thinks that I’m not right for her. She’s my family, they both are, and if you keep treating her like shit and push her away just because she wants to be with me, then you’ll be making the biggest mistake of your life.”
She pauses for a moment, her eyes narrowing as she carefully processes my words. But, unsurprisingly, my words have no effect.
“Once you get the car seat, I want you off my property.”
I observe her for a moment, noting her confident posture that seems as if it’s trying to silently provoke me. I don’t take her bait, instead, I turn away, my hands shoved into my pockets, as everything I desire awaits for me out the front of this house.
It angers me that this woman could treat her own family like that. Poppy is more than enough for me, and she always has been. Despite being famous, I know I can get any woman I want. So why can’t she see the way Poppy completely owns my heart? Why can’t she get that through her fucking head?
As I make my way back to the front, Poppy’s head rises and she glances at me. However, her attention quickly shifts to the front door as her mom emerges. Her mom remains on the front patio, watching me as she unlocks the car. With her gaze fixated on me, it feels as though she’s ensuring that I won’t steal anything, which brings back memories of my teenage years when people would watch me, assuming that I was up to no good.
After releasing the straps and grabbing Alex’s car seat, I shut the rear passenger door. Almost immediately, the car doors lock and the lights flash. Without uttering a single word to Poppy or Alex, she turns and walks back inside the house.
As I return to my family, it suddenly dawns on me that Poppy and I have had similar upbringings. Although Poppy may have had a more comfortable home and always had plenty of food to eat, she never received an ounce of love from her mother. We both had shitty parents. Thankfully, it’s something that our son will never have to go through.
Moving out through the front gate, Alex rushes over and slips his tiny hand into mine. We walk together towards Poppy, who stands there observing us. I can’t help but notice the warmth in her smile as she watches Alex gazing up at me, his own smile beaming.
Within minutes, the car’s engine roars to life, and we’re on our way, bidding farewell to the shitty memories of our childhood homes. This part of the journey is taking a toll on me. The thought of going to Poppy’s place and seeing where she’s been living all these years really bothers me. It will be painful to see their dwelling on the wrong side of town, especially since I’ve been living a life of privilege. It’ll only serve as a constant reminder of the foolish decision I made all those years ago. But thinking about the past won’t do anything. All that matters is the future. But I can’t deny that it will weigh heavily on my emotions.
Driving to the opposite side of town, seeing the familiar sights and hearing the sounds trigger a wave of memories. It evokes a sense of nostalgia, reminding me of the times when Ace and I would venture into this area, mostly during the day, unless we had a hankering for burgers or were on the lookout for casual flings with girls.
I listen to Alex as he tells Poppy about everything that has happened during her time away. The way they interact is truly magical. It is clear that Poppy possesses extraordinary qualities as a mother, and you can feel the love between them in every single moment. Being able to see this is truly remarkable, all thanks to the amazing woman sitting next to me.
As we drive past the burger joint, memories flood back of the countless times Poppy chauffeured me around in her beat-up old car. I can’t help but wonder what became of that old green shit box, the witness to so many precious moments - like our first sexual encounter and the countless adventures we embarked on together, exploring every corner of the town.
“Take the next right turn, and then you’ll spot a big apartment block on your left,” Poppy instructs, indicating the upcoming street.
After some time, we finally arrive at the parking lot of the apartment block.
“Look, there’s one right there, next to my car,” she points out, gesturing towards the empty parking spot beside her old green car.
“I can’t believe you still have that thing,” I remark, stealing a glance at the car as I pull up beside it. It appears even more dilapidated now than it did before, if that’s even possible. My gaze remains fixed on it long after I switch off the engine. Does this mean she was financially strapped and couldn’t afford to replace it? I ponder whether she had enough funds over the years for the repairs.
Aware of Poppy’s watchful eyes on me, I pivot my head and observe the rundown apartment block.
“I’m sorry, Princess. I’m sorry I didn’t know,” I apologize, feeling the sorrow deep in my chest. It’s hitting me hard to see the stark contrast between their way of life and the way I’ve been living.
She reaches out and grabs my chin, redirecting my gaze towards her. “Don’t do that. Don’t blame yourself. If you had known, things would have been different. I had no choice but to do what was essential for our survival at the time.”
I nod, understanding her words, yet my heart still aches at the thought of the agonizing ordeal she had to endure.
She opens the car door and gets out. As she opens Alex’s door, I suppress my guilt and get out of the vehicle. Heading towards the trunk, I retrieve our overnight bags. While we haven’t told Alex about our plans, that we are all living together, Poppy and I have already talked about spending the night in her apartment to sort out some things. This way, the removalist I’ve arranged can transfer her belongings to my house smoothly.
Looking at her current living situation, I”m not sure if it”s a good idea for us to stay here tonight. I’m not so much concerned about the building as I am about the safety of the area. But I”m gonna stay quiet and not share my concerns since this is the home Poppy worked so hard to give Alex.
As we step into the rickety old elevator, its unsettling sounds make me worry it could malfunction any second. I quickly scan the wall for a maintenance inspection tag to check when it was last serviced. Suddenly, with a mechanical crank, the elevator abruptly stops on the twelfth floor and the doors slide open.
Alex is the first one to race out.
“Alex, wait up!” Poppy calls out, stepping out of the elevator and searching through her bag for her keys.
Keeping my eyes on Alex, I watch him race down the dimly lit corridor. The flickering light at the end contributes to the unsettling atmosphere, reminiscent of a scene from a horror movie. He stops at a door, positioned roughly one-third of the way down, and leans against it, patiently waiting for us to catch up.
When we reach the door, Poppy swiftly inserts the key and unlocks it. Alex promptly dashes inside.
Upon entering the apartment, I notice subtle remnants of the life she once had. Despite the limited space in the main room, it’s evident that she has created a comfortable home for Alex. I move further into the room and put Alex’s bag on the worn-out couch. Alex takes off and disappears down a hallway.
While Poppy locks the door, I take in the room, seeing the many music posters that used to hang on her bedroom wall. On the left, I spot the stack of vinyl records that we used to enjoy together, but I can’t help but notice that their number has dwindled. I then glance at the guitar, casually resting against the wall, and start searching for her favorite keyboard. But it”s nowhere to be found. I look at Poppy and see her silently watching me.
“I know it’s nothing fancy, but it’s home,” she says.
“Where’s your keyboard?” I ask, glancing around again to make sure I didn’t overlook it.
“I had to sell it. Alex was sick and I needed the money.”
My heart breaks when I hear that. I know how much that keyboard meant to Poppy. She must”ve seen the hurt on my face, because she comes over, wraps her arms around me, and rests her head on my chest. I wrap my arms around her, silently promising that she will never have to go through that hardship again.
Footsteps echo down the hall, and Alex returns to the room, holding a book in his tiny hands.
“Daddy, can you read this to me?” he asks, racing towards the couch and leaping onto it.
A smile of pure happiness spreads across Poppy”s face as she takes a step back, creating enough room for me to join Alex on the couch.
Sitting down, Alex scoots closer and hands me the book. When I look at the book, a grin spreads across my face as I see a cartoon monkey clutching a banana in its hand.
“Your mom told me you love animals,” I tell him, flipping the book open.
As I read the first lines, I’m reminded of my mom reading to me. I always loved how she”d switch up her voice for every character. Mirroring her, I do the same, and it makes Alex smile. I notice Poppy standing nearby, with a smile on her face, as she observes our heartfelt interaction.