Chapter 21 #2
“Ella, I don’t care what that difference is as long as you’re with me. I hate that you are hurt, that you have suffered and you want to run from me.”
Zee touched his forehead against hers and wrapped his arms around her wait and she let out a wail.
And once she started, she couldn’t stop crying.
He gently wiped away the hot spill of tears with his thumbs.
“I want you to be happy Ella. I’ll do anything I can to make this right for you, to help you recover.”
“It’s not that I’m running away from you, Zee. If you order me to stay and go home, I will. I love you. But right now…” She hiccuped and shook her head, trying to find the words.
“I’ve felt so not like myself for the last while and I don’t know why. I love my life but…” This sounded like she was a whiny wife and she hated that.
Ella knew how fortunate they were, how much they had.
“Nevermind.”
“No, my girl, don’t just push down your own needs. Is that part of it? Tell me.”
Hearing Zee say it, with that cool steely authoritative cemented it in her mind.
“In part. Maybe I’ve just gotten stuck in a rut or in my comfort zone. You and our girls, my friends, everyone I see around me is out there chasing something and I’m content not to but that doesn’t mean that I don’t need…”
She couldn’t make it any clearer than that and the sentence hung there between them in the air.
“Right now, you don’t want to go home. We can get a hotel room. Or you can stay with Helena and Oliver?” The love in his voice pulled her apart.
“It’s okay, Zee.”
“Ella.” He brushed a gentle kiss against her lips, and she didn’t pull away.
He stood and brushed off his pants and sat down next to her on the bench, pulling her next to him.
“You surprised me when you said you didn’t want to go home. I reacted instead of listening to you. The amount of times you have put up with me going away? I think I can handle a night.”
“Only a night?” Ella dragged her fingers through his silver-grey hair.
“It’s a start. And I know you might be mad at me, dear heart, and I’m just going to have to accept that. We’re going to work through it though, together.”
“Why are you so sure?” Ella whispered with tears in her voice.
“Because I know you. And I know us. I know what we are capable of together. And without you, there is no us and I refuse to live with that possibility. We’ll do whatever necessary to patch us up.”
“Master, I love you.”
“I love you, dear heart. Now tell me, where do you want to spend the night?”
“Since you asked,” Ella said, a small smirk on her lips. “I want to go visit Nora.”
“Vancouver Island, it is,” Zee took out his phone. “And I know who can get you there right away.”
***
It helps to have billionaire friends and Ella was so grateful for Xander Montague’s generosity. Still reeling from the hospital stay, and the ordeal, she was happy to just go where she was told.
Zee hugged her hard and gave her a long, passionate kiss before he helped her on helicopter.
“I love you, Ella. I’m going to see you soon.”
“Love you, Zee.” Ella pressed her palm against his scraggly beard and her heart lurched but as hard as it was, she turned away from him and got on that helicopter.
After a quick trip, she landed on Vancouver Island and Nora was there to pick her up.
“Ella! You don’t have to say a thing unless you want to. We will talk more in the hot tub with a glass of wine. What a horrible thing you’ve endured. Let me take care of you.” Her friend wrapped her in a hug, her short blonde hair framing her big brown eyes filled with concern.
“Thank you, Nora.”
“Of course,” Nora took her bag and walked her to her car.
Ella exhaled. She could cry. She hadn’t seen her friend in months.
And why?
Because she was caught up in her life.
Because she was trying to make everything good for Zee.
And when the plan to see Nora fell through, she stayed in her rut, didn’t open her mouth and rolled with it.
Nora squeezed Ella’s hand.
It’s okay, Ella. We’re here.”
Inside the little clapboard house by the water, the kitchen walls glowed in soft yellows, making everything feel calm.
‘I’m going to pour the wine and grab the cheese plate. Or if you need a nap?” Nora’s voice lifted at the end, uncertainty flickering in her eyes before she quickly turned away, busying herself with taking down the dishes.
“The hot tub sounds perfect. Just let me get changed.”
“Take the room at the end, I just had the walls repainted.”
“Thanks, Nora.”
In the guest room with the soft blue walls and the double white iron bed with a purple duvet and fluffy pillows, Ella unzipped her bag and quickly put her things away in the dresser.
Her shoulder gave an ache but the pain wasn’t any worst, somehow her injury came through the being snatched from the garden just fine but she still had a while to go until that was healed.
This charming room is exactly the kind of style she’d decorate the bed-and-breakfast in, if they had one.
Her stomach twisted, that had once been a dream she’d told herself but now it seemed foreign to her, as if it didn’t fit in her life any more.
She changed into her swimsuit and strolled outside to meet her friend.
“Thanks for taking me in.”
Nora waved her comment off.
“Like you’re some stray I picked up? Ella, you know you are always welcome here.” Nora climbed in the hot tub, closing her eyes as she submersed herself.
“I know.” Ella climbed in, exhaling as the water immediately soothed her aches.
“We have a hot tub. We rarely use it.”
“I suggest taking advantage of it.” Nora’s lips twitched and she splashed a cup full of water at Ella. “Have you come to your senses? You’re going to leave Zee and run off with the hotel piano player?”
“Nora!” Ella splashed her friend back. “That piano player was awful, horrible. He messed up Prelude in C Major.”
Talking about that weekend when they were barely adults, the weekend she met Zee made her smile at the memories made her swoon with the heat of the sweet memory.
“You corrected him though, Ella.”
“Only because you pushed me to do it.”
The next day, Ella met Zee and her whole life changed.
“Sometimes we need a push,” Nora shrugged, amusement glinting in her eyes.
“I always need a push,” Ella mumbled, looking up at the darkening sky.
“Nothing wrong with that. You are the one to encourage others to take a chance.”
The hollow despondence she’d carried since the start of the year surged back, impossible to shake.
“I’ve never taken a risk.”
“That’s not true. You left the farm and followed me to that swim meet. When Zee asked you to stay with him, you did. When he asked you to move to where he was from, you didn’t hesitate.”
“All of those were decisions not risks. I was following my heart. I knew he would look out for me.”
“That’s what you felt, Ella. From the outside it looked like this guy with a swagger and an ego the size of the moon swept you off your feet. And into his cuffs.”
Ella’s face heated even though there was nothing her friend said that wasn’t true.
“You still hate him.”
“Someone has to look out for you,” Nora said. “Hate is a strong word. It’s more like I have grown fondly tolerant of him over the years.”
“That’s an improvement.” Ella giggled.
“But this time?” Nora sunk down into the hot tub, letting the eater cover her head before bobbing back up.
“Wasn’t his fault. He can’t protect you from everything, especially not the things he didn’t see coming.
Could he have seen it? Maybe if he had taken his eyes off what he was chasing.
But that’s not his style, Ella. He’s all in on whatever he decides to do. ”
“I know.”
And the tears came fast like a speeding comet, and she couldn’t stop them. “Ella.”
Nora glided over to her and hugged her, patting her shoulder awkwardly until her tears finally stopped.
“Let’s go inside. We can dry off and find a good romcom.”
Ella swiped her eyes. “Thank you. I needed this.”
“Yes, you did. Sometimes you need to remember who you are outside of your roles.”
Roles.
Ella had many and she loved all of them but this time they all had demanded too much of her and not enough.
“Did I tell you that Annie sent me a job posting a few months ago?”
“No, you didn’t mention it,” Nora said with a smirk, passing her a towel.”
Ella toweled off, followed her friend in through her patio doors into her kitchen.
“Yes, it’s a piano coach—they have those now—at her university. She thinks I’d be perfect for it. I thought about it and discarded it.”
“Why? Out of all the things you’re good at, the piano is your true love.”
“Because of Zee and everything we had going on. Because my heart leapt when I saw the posting then all the doubts came in. I don’t have a degree, I’m not good enough, I’m out of practice.”
“Ella, if you’re out of practice, Beethoven never existed. What did Zee think?”
“I didn’t tell him.”
“Oh? That’s curious.”
Ella flushed, guilt twisting her stomach.
“The job is still open.”
“I’ll cheer you on and clap louder than anyone when you get it,” Nora picked up the tray from the counter. “Grab the wine.”
“I’m not supposed to drink.”
“Break the rules every now and then, Ella. So what are you going to play for the audiiton?”
“You think I should do it, just like that?” Ella grabbed the wine from the counter, follwoign Nora to the living room.
“Well, it’s not like you need the name of my divorce attorney.”
Ella laughed, shaking her head at her oldest friend. “You’re incorrigible.”
The settled on the couch and flicked on the movie and Ella finally felt like she could breathe. Almost at the end of the movie, they were interrupted by the doorbell chiming.
Nora checked her security camera on her phone, smiling huge. “He has some good qualities. I’ll be right back.”
“Okay,” Ella snuggled into the couch.
The wine and the hot tub, being in Nora’s quiet and calm house was the remedy she needed and her eyelids drooped.
“Ella, these are for you.”
Nora swept into the room, her hands full of a massive bouquet of carnations.
“That’s…” Her cheeks heated as her heart fluttered.
“Yeah, complete overkill. ‘ll find a vase. You read the card.”
Ella laughed, inhaling the flowers and opened the card.
I love you, dear heart. If you need me, I won’t be far away.
“What did he say?” Nora set a vase on the coffee table.
“That he won’t be far away.”
“Obviously, I wonder what B-and-B he’s booked in.” Nora plopped down next to her.
“I don’t know.” Ella shrugged. “I guess you think it’s strange that I don’t mind that he did this.”
“No, Ella, I think what you and Zee have is a rare thing and you’re very lucky,” her friend said, smiling.
Ella blinked away another surge of tears.
“I know I am.”