Chapter 5 #2
While for most people that likely wouldn't even leave behind a bruise, because her daughter’s skin was so fragile, even a slight bump could split it open.
Given this was only her second night in the mansion, Kate wasn't surprised she bumped into something since she didn't know the layout of the room yet. That was why she’d wanted them to share a room—that, and she loved having her daughter close since she might not have her around much longer—but Ariella wanted to be a big girl and have her own room.
“Okay, sweetie, hop up here on the bed. I’ll go grab the first aid kit.” Standing, she helped Ariella climb up onto the bed so her daughter could keep pressure on her wound. With her condition, Ariella could bleed for hours from just a simple bump like this.
Since it was her daughter’s normal, Ariella didn't complain or whine or even cry. She’d only been six when she was first diagnosed, so a third of her life had been battling aplastic anemia.
Ariella just sat there while Kate tucked her in, then walked over to the bedroom door to switch on the light before heading to her own bathroom to collect the first aid kit she’d left there.
After Ariella’s diagnosis, she never went anywhere without a first aid kit, but yesterday an even more impressively stocked one had appeared in her bathroom, and she assumed that was Leo’s doing.
He’d told her that he’d read up on their child’s condition, and he seemed knowledgeable about it.
More than that, he seemed to be taking her sudden appearance in his life in stride, handling everything better than she ever could have hoped.
Better than she had in the early days of Ariella’s illness.
“All right, sweetie, let’s—” Kate broke off as she stepped back into the bedroom to find Leo striding into the room.
“Everything okay?” he asked, his gaze moving from the first aid kit in her hands to Ariella sitting in the bed.
Seeing her daughter’s eyes light up at the sight of her father stoked the fires of Kate’s anger, but she kept her expression neutral.
She wasn't jealous that her daughter was bonding with Leo, Ariella had been practically buzzing with excitement when she returned from her time in the forest with her dad the day before, but it devastated her that Ariella had missed out on this for nine years.
Leo should have been there.
If he was this happy to find out she’d kept the baby, why had he told her to abort it in the first place?
“Just a cut that won't stop bleeding, we have it under control,” she said, probably a little too dismissively if the flash of hurt on Leo’s face was anything to go by.
Despite everything, she didn't take any pleasure from causing him pain, she just wasn't that kind of person. She was angry, yes, furious in fact, but she’d rather avoid her feelings than confront them.
“Can Daddy stay, Mom?” Ariella asked as Kate crossed to the bed and perched on the edge of it, already rifling through the kit for bandages.
It was on the tip of her tongue to remind Leo that she’d been doing this on her own a long time now, that it had always just been her and Ariella, that she didn't need his help, and that if he’d wanted to help, he should have stuck around.
But she didn't.
Instead, she just kept her expression neutral and nodded. “Of course, sweetie-pie, whatever you want.”
Sacrificing for her daughter was completely normal for her. She’d been doing it for a decade. If her sick and dying child wanted her dad around as much as possible, then she would suck it up and deal with it.
If the worst happened and Ariella didn't survive, she would never have to see Leo again. And if he was able to save her daughter for her, she wouldn't stop them spending time together, she’d just continue to suck it up, because nothing was more important than Ariella’s happiness.
“I can do that,” Leo said, sitting beside her and reaching for the clotting cream she’d pulled out of the first aid kit. Their fingers brushed as he took the ointment from her, and she hated the way her body could still respond to his.
It might not get that this man had hurt her, but her brain couldn’t forget.
Whore.
Baby-trap.
Useless.
Pathetic.
Child.
Terrible mother.
Every insult Leo had flung at her that fateful day was permanently etched inside her head.
Forgetting them just wasn't possible. Leo hadn't just dumped her, he’d been purposefully cruel about it. Telling her she’d tricked him into sleeping with her because she was a whore, then baby-trapping him.
He’d screamed that she was useless and pathetic, nothing more than a child herself, and would be a terrible mother, so she should just terminate the pregnancy because he wanted nothing to do with either of them.
Those words hadn't just stuck with her, they’d permeated her every waking moment those first months.
Her confidence had been almost at zero when Ariella was born, and then when the diagnosis came in, she’d blamed herself.
Maybe Leo was right, maybe she had been a terrible person and a terrible mother, and her child was being punished because of it.
As though he sensed her spiraling thoughts, Leo pressed his front against her back for a second, seemingly trying to offer silent comfort even though he was the source of her pain.
Then he was moving again, talking softly to Ariella as he applied the clotting ointment to the small cut, then wrapped it with a bandage, tight enough to hopefully stop the wound from bleeding for too much longer.
By the time he was done, Ariella’s eyes were already drooping closed. Not only was she always tired and needed to nap during the day, but she’d been riding a high these last two days, getting to meet the dad she’d dreamed about for so long, so it was no wonder all the excitement had wiped her out.
“You don’t have to move her, she can sleep in here the rest of the night. I don’t mind. She often sleeps with me when she’s not feeling well,” Kate said, already tucking the covers up around her daughter before leaning in to brush a kiss to her forehead.
Leo also pressed a kiss to a sleeping Ariella’s forehead, before heading to the door, where he paused. When he turned around to face her, the mess of emotions on his face seemed to hit her like a physical blow.
“Can we talk, Kate, please?” he asked.
No. Not asked.
Begged.
Big, strong, tough, confident Leo was begging her.
She had no idea how to feel about that.
“Voodoo will sit with Ariella. Indigo, too,” Leo pushed as though sensing that would be her response.
There was no way in hell she was comfortable with one of those men sitting beside her sleeping daughter. She didn't trust them as far as she could throw them, which was exactly zero inches.
“They’d never hurt her. Ever. I know it’s hard for you to believe that, given how you met them, but I want to explain.
All of it. I swear I never wanted to hurt you.
I’ll tell you everything. I know it won't make it all better, I can't undo what I did, or erase the pain I caused, but at least you’ll understand the whys. You’ll know that I never stopped loving you, and that I've regretted what I did every day since.”
It was on the tip of her tongue to tell him it didn't matter, that he was right, and the whys wouldn't undo the pain, but Kate had to believe that Leo would be a match, that the bone marrow transplant would save her daughter’s life, which meant that Leo would be part of both their lives going forward. If she was going to have to deal with this man for the rest of her life, then for her daughter’s sake, it would be nice to move past some of the hostility.
But the reality was, nothing Leo could tell her would make her stop hating him.
Nothing.