CH 44 - #maybe
Riley
Song: “Rockland” by Gracie Abrams
WHEN I RETURNED from Cheers and Beers, my parents were sacked out in the living room. After walking over to them, I grabbed the remote off the table between their recliners and turned off the TV. Then I woke up my momma and daddy and told them to go get in bed. A couple of minutes later, I was lying in mine, hugging a pillow and crying into it.
I’d made another big mistake by coming to Cypress Hills this weekend. It didn’t matter that I had the best intentions. They’d blown up in my face.
Macie texted me after she and Noah made it to his house in Longview. She told me that she loved me and would check on me tomorrow. I sent back a thumbs-up emoji.
I wasn’t upset at her for how she had handled seeing Rhys and Carrie together. It was all in my defense, and I appreciated it. But the resemblance between Carrie and me had me upset. I knew it was nothing more than a coincidence, but wow. Just fucking wow.
I wondered if Rhys had imagined it was me when talking to Carrie, dancing with her, and whatever else they had done. Seeing them together twice today, I was sure they’d had sex. Body language didn’t lie. Especially Rhys’s.
I fell asleep and woke up a little after midnight. I knew it was a crazy idea, but I wanted to drive around, listen to music, and think. So I quietly left my momma and daddy’s, got into my car, and started cruising through downtown, which didn’t take long. Then, I hit the backroads.
Another crazy idea came to me, but I talked myself out of doing it. I couldn’t drive by Rhys’s house, even as much as I wanted to get a glimpse of it. What if he was awake and outside for some reason and then spotted my car? That wouldn’t be good. I’d be so embarrassed.
I was still driving around when 2:00 a.m. arrived and decided to throw caution to the wind. I headed to Rhys’s, running my thumb over the beautiful sapphire and diamond engagement ring he’d given me the whole way there.
When I reached the dirt road leading to his house, I slowly turned onto it after turning off my car’s lights. Then, I noticed the glow of the string lights on Rhys’s patio in the distance. A moment later, I saw movement. It was Rhys. He was sitting at the table—alone.
I continued watching him, getting more choked up by the second until I couldn’t take it anymore and started backing up. Goosebumps suddenly covered me from head to toe as two ethereal images appeared a few yards in front of my car. I slammed on the brakes, keeping my eyes on Joseph and Rosalie. I’d never seen them before but knew it was them because Rhys had shown me their picture.
They waved at me to follow them, turned around, and began floating toward Rhys’s. Seconds later, my car shifted into drive on its own and moved forward as my heart raced and my hands trembled.
When Joseph, Rosalie, and I had almost reached Rhys’s house, they vanished. I looked back at Rhys, still sitting on the patio, and saw him looking over his shoulder in my direction. He walked up as I was parking next to Black Betty.
I opened my door, got out of my car, and whispered, “Hi.”
“What are you doing here, Riley?”
“I-I was out driving the backroads and wanted to see your house. Then Joseph and Rosalie appeared on your road and brought me here. I wasn’t going to do this.”
“So now what?” Rhys asked, shrugging his shoulders.
“Can we please just talk?”
“About what?”
“You and me.”
He searched my eyes for the longest time and finally said, “Okay.”
“Would you mind if we went inside your house? It’s chilly out here.”
He nodded, and I followed him to his front door. After opening it, he stepped aside and motioned for me to enter.
“Let’s sit in the living room,” he said as I walked past him.
After we took our places at opposite ends of the couch, the lamps on the two end tables flickered. Joseph and Rosalie were still here.
I stared at Rhys before speaking, feeling my emotions steadily rise. This reminded me of when I came to his house the first time, and we talked about when I ended things with him last year, him asking for my momma and daddy’s permission to marry me, my engagement ring, and all.
“I miss you,” I said, my voice cracking.
Rhys didn’t say anything.
“I love you, too, and you know I always have,” I continued. “I wish you believed I’ve been faithful to you. It’s not in me to cheat. I made a mistake by not telling you that Chad and I ran into each other at Starbucks and were civil. I made another mistake when I didn’t tell you I’d asked him to return my things. If I could go back in time, I would tell you everything. I’m so sorry. Please forgive me.”
Rhys’s eyes had already started tearing up. “Have you talked to or seen Chad since I ended our relationship?” he asked.
“No, not once. I have no desire to either.”
“Have you met anyone new?”
“No. I’m not looking. Are you seeing that news reporter?”
“I thought about it. But no, I’m not seeing her. Even though she looks like you, she’s not you, Riley. No one ever would be.”
Rhys’s chin started quivering, and he wiped his eyes. I got up from the couch, stepped over to him, and knelt down on the floor. We stared at each other, feeling a thousand emotions as tears rolled down his cheeks and mine. Then I risked hugging Rhys, and he received me into his arms.
We turned our heads while letting go of each other, and our lips almost touched. Rhys looked down at mine, and I leaned in, resting my forehead against his.
“Let’s work through this. Let’s get back together. Please,” I whispered.
Rhys took a deep breath and slowly shook his head no. Then he scrunched his face, grabbed mine, and started kissing me. Before I knew it, he’d lifted me off the floor, underneath my arms, and pulled my legs around his waist. Our hunger for each other poured out, but Rhys unexpectedly stopped everything, looked at me, and shook his head no again.
“I can’t do this, Riley,” he said, shocking me. “I still don’t believe nothing was going on between you and Chad.”