Chapter 21
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
SELENE
The sky outside the castle had faded into night by the time Bren and I finished our dinner, leaving only the flickering candles to provide light. Some had burned enough to sputter but held yet.
I appreciated his apology more than he knew and was grateful he hadn’t completely discounted my claim that the wraith had moved.
But his statement that the creatures might do things they’d never done in the past left me uneasy.
I wanted him to be the expert in all things magical.
I valued his protection and had wanted him to teach me more.
But the familiar urge to run and hide had crept back in.
Bren turned his wine glass slowly by the stem as the candlelight flickered against it. He lifted his gaze to me, his brows slightly drawn. “Do you know Maeve’s gran well?”
His question had come out of the blue and surprised me. “That was the first time I met her, though Maeve has spoken of her often. Why?”
Bren scrubbed his jaw, seeming uncomfortable. “I realize I have no right to your private conversations, but I’d like to ask what the woman said to you. It seemed she’d come for more than just a friendly chat.”
I shifted in my chair. “Maeve told her about me, about what I am, and she wanted to meet me.”
He held my gaze. “Do you know the why of it?”
I lifted one shoulder in a casual shrug. “She knew some about ward witches. Wanted to warn me not to tell anyone what I was.”
His jaw ticked once and then stopped. “Because?”
I considered not going into detail, but Gran had told me to stay close to the guardian. I guessed that equated to trusting him. “Hundreds of years ago, they were hunted to extinction by those against the forming of the Veil.”
“Extinction?” He remained still for a long moment. “I knew they’d vanished, but I never understood why.”
I shrugged again as if the deaths of women like me were of no consequence. “It was a long time ago.”
Hints of silver flashed in his dark eyes. “Someone should have told me.”
I half-wished no one had told me. “She called me an anomaly.” I turned the word over again, the way I had several times in the past few days. “She said she’d never heard of a ward witch who could do what I’ve done.”
I shook my head, still unable to internalize it. “She made my abilities sound like a gift. Something rare and good.”
Bren shook his head but said nothing.
The reaction heightened my fear. “You disagree?”
He refilled his glass before meeting my gaze. “Rare? It seems you are.” He paused for a healthy swallow. “Good? Not in my eyes.”
His words made no sense. “Explain.”
Bren heaved a deep sigh. “Maeve’s gran heard what you can do and thought one thing. Extraordinary.” He met my eyes. “I heard something else. Danger. A ward witch who can sense the Veil better than a guardian isn’t just rare, Selene. You could be visible to anyone paying attention. A target.”
A candle sputtered and went out. “I don’t want to be visible.”
He snorted softly. “That would be my preference too.”
I shook my head, wondering if I could survive everything being thrown at me. “I don’t want to be part of whatever this is. A war between realms I don’t understand, between people I’ve never met, over an invisible boundary I can feel more than see, one I only learned existed a few weeks ago.”
“I know.” He fell back against his chair. “I wish I could tell you we could change things.”
I slapped my hand against the table, harder than I had meant to. “What does that mean, Bren? I want to know all of it.” My voice shook on my last words, but I kept going. “If my life is in actual danger, I deserve to know.”
Bren held my gaze for a long moment, his dark and worried. But then his eyes changed. Silver reflected there as he hardened his jaw. “You’re right. You deserve to know.”
I held my breath as he paused, then released it as he started to speak. “There’s a reason I’ve kept my distance from you. It was never indifference. It was never because I didn’t want you. I need you to understand that before I explain the rest.”
My heart grasped what he’d said before my mind did. My pulse pounded wildly as I studied his eyes and found only sincerity. “Could you repeat that?” I whispered.
He glanced down for a moment before he met my gaze. “I’m sorry, Selene. I should have told you the truth sooner, but you were already dealing with so much. Forgive me.”
My breath caught as his words broke open feelings I’d pretended weren’t there. “I don’t understand.” My voice came out softer than I intended, and I hoped I wouldn’t regret trusting him.
“You couldn’t. Not all of it.” He turned his glass again, not drinking. “When we touch, when we’re close enough to really feel each other, something happens. My magic responds to yours. Yours responds to mine. It isn’t subtle, not to anyone capable of feeling it.”
His gaze drifted to the nearest candle, the flames casting shadows on his face. “I suspect it’s like the disturbance you feel when the Veil tears. A ripple in the fabric of our world. You describe it as something being out of place.”
“Another ripple?” Events over the past few weeks clicked into place and tightened my stomach. “And someone could feel us? The way I feel a breach?”
“Something similar.”
I swallowed against the lump in my throat as I processed the entirety of what he said. “I thought it was because you didn’t want to get close to me. Not because doing so was dangerous.”
“Never.” He caught my gaze and held it. “I couldn’t endanger your life like that.”
I accepted his confession and let my gaze drift across the darkening great hall while I reframed our interactions. His distance stemmed from a place of protection, not indifference. “Why didn’t you just tell me?”
“This is new to me too, and I didn’t want to worry you.” He held my gaze, his expression filled with regret. “I should have.”
His confession, really everything, seemed surreal, and I struggled for words. The ones that came out surprised me, but I couldn’t seem to stop them. “What if we’re somewhere isolated? Like here, late at night, hidden by all this stone, with no one else around. Would someone still feel us?”
Bren closed his eyes briefly as if he didn’t want to answer. “The grove was isolated. It will still happen.”
I wanted to take him at his word, but his explanation wasn’t enough for me. “How would you know if no one’s around to feel it?”
He reached for his wine and drank before he answered. “Because no one was anywhere near us in the grove. And someone felt it.” He paused long enough to give his next words weight. “Both times. From all the way in Dublin.”
That far? If my energy rippled across that distance, how would I ever stay hidden? The fear that crept through me left me mute, and I could only stare at him.
Bren anchored his arms on the table and leaned closer. “Did you hear me? Both times we’ve kissed, someone felt it from clear across the country.”
I set my wine down to keep from spilling it, and I finally found my voice. “Is that someone who’d hurt us?”
“Not physically. At least, I don’t believe so.” He paused, and the tenderness that filled his expression warned me of his next words. “But it might hurt you, learning who it is.”
Suspicion bore into me, and I prayed it was no one I cared about. “Tell me.”
He dropped his gaze for half a second before he found mine again. “Cillian felt us. He knows. About me. About the Veil. About what you are. He recognized your magic the moment you stepped foot in Ireland.”
Several seconds passed before I could gather myself enough to speak. “He knew?”