Chapter 25 #2
“Red seven.” The dealer called out. It was like music to my ears and my whole body sagged with relief at my first win.
I should have stopped there.
The next couple of hours flew by and right now, I was just about breaking even. We stopped at the blackjack tables, settled myself on a stool and that’s where I stayed. At this very point in time, I should have given in and walked away.
I didn’t.
Instead, Gavin Wright knew best.
And he was the cunt who liked to bring everyone down with him.
“Why don’t we go grab a drink? Have a break.” Karen said, her hand weaved around my elbow.
“I can’t.” My head shook frantically, but I didn’t look at Karen as I answered, instead my focus was trained on the table.
I tapped the table for more chips and the croupier pushed more my way.
I swiped my brow with the back of my hand, I tried to appear unnerved, but inside I was trembling. I just needed this win.
This win and I could walk away. But would I?
“Gav. Please?” I felt her hand on my arm, but I ignored it.
I flipped my cards over, and like tunnel vision, they were all I could see, and I’d broke.
I stared as the croupier dragged all the chips from out of my reach, further and further away until they were on the opposite side.
I’d lost and so it started the spiral. The sweat coated my palms and forehead as my head fell back on my shoulders and I dragged in a deep breath as my eyes closed at my own self-hate.
When I opened them again, my gaze fell upon Alex as he leaned on the railing watching me, just like he said he would be. Fuck!
Karen had disappeared from my side, I didn’t know when she’d left, but right at this minute, I didn’t care.
It was like the other side of me had come out to play.
The devil was chasing his demons, and right now he was winning, because I couldn’t give a toss about anyone else but me and getting my money back.
The rational side of me knew that wasn’t going to happen.
The croupier nodded my way, I did the same back and pushed the rest of my chips into the middle, he hooked his stick around them and dragged them towards him, it was all I had left, I blew out a calming breath as my card followed.
I rested my fingers on it for just a second, they trembled with hope.
My eyes closed again as I turned it slowly over.
As I checked them my fingers shook even more and asked for another card, then another.
As I tallied them up; I felt sick. I broke again.
It felt like the world was bearing heavily on my shoulders, I fell forwards, my forehead hit the table with a thud until my body sagged.
“Come on, dude, that’s enough.” I recognised Alex’s voice straight away. He patted my shoulder. He tried to comfort me, but I didn’t want comfort. I needed to fucking play.
I had to pull myself together. I stood and took my wallet out. “Just one more game.” I opened it up and saw I had no cash left so it was whatever I had available in the bank on my card. “Got a cashpoint?”
“A what?” Alex asked confused. A frown pinched the skin between his eyes.
“Fuck. An ATM.”
“No, dude. You’re done. I’m not going to be responsible for you cleaning yourself out. And Roman wants you anyway.”
My eyes rolled skyward. “Yeah, to act like my fucking dad.” I groaned.
“I don’t care. This is my casino and you’re not playing anymore.
” I turned and faced off with him. He was a decent sized guy but that didn’t matter.
Just then his security towered over him from behind.
I looked to the left and saw Karen looking worried.
Nikki stood next to her, looking more than fucking disgusted with me as her head shook.
“Just one more game. I can win!”
“No.” Alex’s voice was firm. I pushed them back.
I needed a win. A win would make it all good again.
“I warned you, Gav. This is for your own good.” With the words fuck you on the tip of my tongue, I looked past Alex and saw his brother and Rhys.
Fuck, fuck, fuck. Rhys’s face was hard as he glared at me.
He moved through the throng of people and straight up to me, getting in my face.
“Walk the fuck away, Gav. Not here, not tonight.”
“Come on Rhys, man, help me out.” I begged my friend to let me carry on. If Roman could be down here, I knew he would be, but he was with Paisley. I looked up at the VIP room and saw Roman standing just a little way away from the window, “Please.” I begged again. I was fucking desperate.
“Out.” Rhys swung his arm in the direction of the door. “Lucky for you, we’re friends, otherwise I’d be fucking throwing you out of here myself.”
“Alex.” I turned and tried to plead to his better side. “Just one more game. I’ll get on my knees and fucking beg if I have to…please?” My knees buckled and I hit the ground, “Please.” I couldn’t even begin to wonder how much I’d lost tonight, I just needed to get back on there and make up for it.
“Get fucking up, Gav.” Rhys said but I ignored him.
“Go home, Gav.” Alex answered, his face stern.
My hands brushed my face and I rubbed my eyes before Rhys helped me from the ground.
I shrugged his hand from me and nodded at Alex.
As I looked between them, I could see the looks of disgust aimed at me…
the problem was though, they couldn’t be more disgusted than I felt with myself right now.
I whirled away from them and strode out of there.
The warm air hit my face as soon as I stepped out of the main doors and pushed my body up against the wall outside, I needed a minute to calm down. My body bent at the waist, my elbows dug into the tops of my knees and I dropped my face into my hands.
Ten minutes had passed when I decided it was time to get the fuck out of there. What the fuck was I thinking anyway, going up against Alex like that? He owned the place. He’d warned me.
“Hey,” I heard her gentle voice, but I didn’t look her way, I couldn't. “Gav?” I lifted my head and tilted back to the wall and let my eyes close. I heard her heels, a dull click on the tarmac and opened my eyes again.
What the hell must she think of me now?
“Are you okay.” She stood a little away from me, her hands wrung tightly in front of her.
“Not really.”
“Do you want to talk?” She asked, I could hear the tinge of nervousness in her voice.
“Nope.” I replied, popping the P. But I needed to touch her. I needed everything that was good about her to help me. I needed help.
I needed her. I stood back up to my full height and focused on her, prowling towards her and lifting her chin with my fingers.
She backed up until she was against the wall and I placed my hands either side of her head, caging her in.
“No, right now, I want to swap one vice for another, and fuck you.”
“Nice, thanks.” Her hands planted against my chest and shoved me away. I stumbled but not enough to put any real distance between us, though. I sniggered and closed the gap.
“What? It’d make me feel so much better.”
Her eyes narrowed and her jaw tensed as I was concentrating on her face, I didn’t see the hand coming towards me.
The slap echoed in the deserted air outside as she stepped away from me, her arms fell to her sides and her hands balled tightly.
My hand moved to my face and brushed my fingers over it as I smirked.
“Why do you do that? Why the hell are you pushing me away, Gav? I’ve come out here to see if you’re okay and that’s what I get.”
“Oh, come on…” I blew out a tired breath.
“No, Gav. I’m a person. And right now, from what I can see, I’m the only one you’ve got.
” She chewed her lip frantically as her chin wobbled.
What a wanker. Fuck. I gazed down at the ground for a second before I lifted my chin and watched her.
She glared right back at me, until her head shook and she spun around and marched back towards the door.
What the fuck had I done? She didn’t deserve that.
My feet moved swiftly until I had my hand on her and stopped her from going any further. “K. Don’t go.”
“What do you want from me, Gav? I try so hard…”
My hands cradled her face. As soon as she let me touch her, I felt a sense of ease.
I had no idea how to deal with that, and it was something I wouldn’t question tonight, my head was too fucked as it was.
I just wanted to kiss her. I swept my thumbs roughly across her cheekbones…
understated beauty, I thought as my lips crushed to hers, the feel of her, soft against me and the taste of her, set off that need in me.
I kissed her like I’d never had my lips on hers before.
Yeah, I’d had a few drinks, but I was nowhere near intoxicated; that made a change.
There was nothing gentle about me right now.
This was where her fight or flight instinct could come in. “Please, don’t go.”
She pulled her lips from mine and pushed lightly at my chest. She nodded quickly, “Not here.” She added breathlessly.
The door closed again, but I didn’t care who was watching.
I brushed my now solid cock against her leg, showing her just how much I wanted her.
No, needed to be inside her, then smashed my lips back to hers in another explosive kiss.
“Come home with me.” I gasped as I slowed it down.
Her incoherent answer mumbled against my lips that were still on hers, and just as I began to pick the kiss back up, I couldn’t have anticipated the next voice I heard.
“I fucking knew there was something going on with you two.” My head turned towards the lethal tone of Nikki’s voice. She stood, all prim and proper, as I put my gaze on her. A fierce pout tensed her jaw, while her fingers gripped her hips with hard eyes on me.
“Nik. What the fuck do you want me to say?”
She didn’t answer, just glared. Karen spoke as she pushed me away and came around me, “Nikki…” I was tired, tired of fucking everything.
“Don’t.” Her finger shook from side to side between us, “This isn’t your fault. I blame him.”
“Fucking women!” I sneered, she shook her head at me again for probably the third time tonight, then turned and marched back inside.
“What am I going to do now? She’s gonna hate me.” Karen worried her lip between her teeth.
“Nikki hates everyone, don’t take it personally.”
“Gav,” She huffed loudly at my answer, it was her turn to drop her head into her hands this time. “Not everyone thinks like you.” I went to her and took her hands away from her face until her eyes met mine. “I actually care what people think of me.”
“Come home with me.”
She stared for longer than a beat until she finally spoke up, “On one condition.” She breathed deeply and held my hands.
“Go on.” I was desperate to get out of here.
“Only if you tell me everything.” Her finger pointed gently into my chest, “You fucking tell me everything about you, Gavin Wright, including what went on in there.” She swung her arm around to point at the casino.
I nodded. It couldn't wait any longer. It was definitely time.
“The good, the bad, and the downright ugly, and we take it from there.” I agreed again. “No more hiding.”
I brought her against me, her body soft on mine as her forehead fell against my chest. I clutched the back of her head in my palm and held her there.
There had never been any inclination to explain myself to anyone.
If people didn’t like it, fuck them, but her - she reached me on a level I didn’t understand, a part of me didn’t want to let that go, but I was worried that my usual dickhead self would do something to ruin it.
It was what I always did, and why I disappointed people.
“I’m sorry I slapped you.”
She turned her chin up towards me, “Don’t be, it’s not the first one and I doubt it’ll be the last.” My fingers moved into her hair, and I held her against me.
We stayed like that for a few minutes until I saw a cab approaching.
I lifted an arm up in the air and hailed it down, took Karen’s hand then pulled her with me to the curb.
As soon as it stopped, I made her get in first and I followed her in.
I gave the driver my address as we set off down the darkened road.
Within seconds my phone dinged, I knew exactly who that was, but I wasn’t about to answer him right now, he could wait in line.