Chapter 4 #2
Sam matched my gait as we followed the golden streets into the heart of the compound. While the structures were impressive, the garden that rested at the center of it was absolutely breathtaking.
“No luck on replicating the immortal’s flower,” Azra said with a positive smirk on his lips that didn’t match his words.
“But?” I hedged.
He ran his wing over mine as we walked. Azra took my right side while Sam guarded my left. Nothing could hurt us here, but my angels were still impossibly protective nonetheless.
“But…” Azra said, drawing out the word as he arched a brow, “there have definitely been some strides on the trees.”
Sam scoffed. “You and your damn cherry trees. There’s more to life than the perfect drink, brother.”
“Oh, but it’s not just a drink,” Azra said, brushing his fingers through his dark hair. “It’s about purity, innocence, and the flare of heat of new passion. The perfect cherry-vodka drink is just as good as sex, when done right.”
“Then you’ve been doing sex wrong,” Sam grumbled, walking ahead of us as he flared his wings. Glancing at me, then to his brother, he added something in that strange language they sometimes shared.
I couldn’t understand the meaning, but I could certainly catch the tone.
He wasn’t happy.
His majestic wings fanned out to their full, glorious length in the next instant before he disappeared in the gold-frosted sky a moment later.
“What’d he say?” I asked, more than a little perplexed by his attitude.
“Something rude that I won’t translate.”
“Can you give me a hint?” I asked.
He rubbed his perfect chin before answering. “He’s… frustrated that you haven’t established your bond with us.”
Scoffing, I frowned. “It’s not like I don’t want to. Seriously, what’s his problem?”
I knew that he was frustrated, but he had to know that I was just as frustrated about this whole damn situation.
Sam knew how I felt about him. He was half of a coin when it came to his brother, the only coin I had to complete the pieces of my destiny.
The keys to my heart and all of my desires.
Sam was the serious side of immortality. He carefully considered all angles and held his morality above all else in his decisions.
As far as Sam was concerned, loving me, even worshipping me, was the true north of his moral compass.
Azra was the whimsical side of immortality. He acted on emotion, and on instinct.
Him and his brother made a good pair… and a great balance to the heavenly side of my soul that I wanted to better understand.
The only reason we hadn’t bonded was because it was too dangerous, not because I didn’t want to.
“But why is he upset about that now?” I asked. It had been three months since our fight with Lucifer, so the levels of sexual and emotional frustration had been high all around for quite some time.
“You never know when it comes to Samael,” Azra said with a shrug and a flutter of his perfect wings. “It doesn’t take much to get his feathers in a twist.”
“Do you think it’s because of Cole?” I knew I was being blunt, but it didn’t make much sense to pretend they didn’t know what had happened, or rather what hadn’t happened. “The bonding didn’t work. Shouldn’t he be glad?”
Azra didn’t meet my gaze. He remained silent for a few moments until I wondered if he’d even heard me.
Then he answered when we rounded the bend to the gardens. “You really should talk to him about it, beloved.”
I would have retorted with something witty, however the garden was more beautiful than I’d ever seen it. The emerald trees, magnificent jeweled fruits, and glittering flowers took my breath away.
The twins had definitely made progress since the last time I’d been here.
Azra smiled, then took my hand and drew me into the garden. Words died on my tongue when the intoxicating floral scents enveloped us, leaving me speechless.
And then he took me to the trees that towered over us with regal posture.
His trees. I knew this place belonged to Azra the moment I spotted the gorgeous red orbs.
Cherries.
Or his versions of cherries, anyway, infused with little droplets of heaven.
He grinned, seemingly pleased with my reaction. “I thought you might like it.”
Unable to resist, I reached up and touched one of the red jewels. They most definitely weren’t normal cherries. A glow emanated from within them, illuminating the perfect spheres that looked positively heavenly. “Why are they doing that?” I asked, mesmerized.
“Hmm,” he said, wrapping one wing around me, although he was careful to avoid the sharp prongs on my demon’s wing.
“This is the power of Heaven, Lilith. Through worshipping you, Sam and I have been able to access it again.” He winked.
“I’m sure Sam will show you what he’s done with his power, but it won’t beat these cherries. ”
“Are they safe to eat?” I asked. They looked delicious, but I knew a powerful object when I spotted one.
“That depends. How have you done lately with Holy Water?”
I thought back to when Kaito had offered me a drink. It had rejuvenated me, not harmed me. Perhaps this was exactly the treatment I needed right now.
“It’s gone well,” I told him. “After Cole and I… it helped.”
He folded his fingers over mine and helped me pluck one of the decedent treats. “Then this might help as well. Open your mouth, beloved,” he instructed with a wicked gleam to his amethyst gaze.
I obeyed.
“Now bite,” he said, holding the cherry in place.
Sinking my teeth into the fruit’s ruby flesh, I groaned with pure bliss as sweetness exploded across my tongue.
“Oh my gods,” I murmured as I wrapped both my hands around his and devoured the offering.
A rumbling chuckle sounded in his chest, making my toes curl. “Not gods, beloved. This is your essence that you’re tasting… so I’ll admit, it’s pretty hot seeing you enjoy tasting yourself so much.”
I licked his fingers, not caring if he was teasing me.
When nothing but a rounded cherry pit was left, I took a moment to appreciate its uniqueness. The seed was more like a polished gemstone made of black sapphire rather than the jagged center of cherries back on Earth.
“Is that edible?” I asked him.
He turned the stone over in his fingers. “Yes, but I imagine it would be poisonous.”
Frowning, I took it from him and studied the dark object. “I suppose that makes sense. Cherries on Earth contain amygdalin. It’s a chemical that converts to hydrogen cyanide, toxic to a human body.”
The metaphor also wasn’t lost on me. My essence created the cherries, but a poisonous pit remained inside.
Light and dark all in one package.
Azra stared at me for a moment. “Kaito has been studying up on cherries, has he?”
Laughing, I handed the stone back to him. “How’d you guess?”
He grinned. “That demon is positively obsessed with me.” My angel pocketed the strange treasure in his tight jeans. “I know you’re smart, my beloved, but human biology isn’t your forte.” He brushed a lock of hair from my face, tucking it behind my ear.
“Is that so?”
His touch swept through my feathers on my right side. “There’s nothing human about you, Lilith. And that’s something I love.” When he wrapped his other arm around me and reached for my demon wing, I flinched away.
“Don’t,” I said on a loose breath. My gaze dropped as my chest warmed from his proximity.
I didn’t want him to hurt himself. I couldn’t control my wings very well, especially a wing that my body rejected.
“You think I don’t love all of you, Lilith?” he asked, tilting his head.
I flicked my gaze up to him. “You hate demons just as much as Sam does. Why shouldn’t you hate me?”
He gave me a sad smile. “Don’t misunderstand our duty for hate, beloved. We’ve maintained the truce for eons. We never knew what demons could really be like… not until we met you.”
“You knew me for ten years,” I countered. It had been before my rebirth when my soul had resided in Purgatory, seeking refuge with the angels until I had been able to return. I didn’t remember much of it, but they did.
He nodded. “That was only a part of you, beloved. The angelic part. We didn’t get to really know you until now… and you’re even more perfect than we could have imagined.”
I frowned, but didn’t reply. It wasn’t a good enough reason. He hadn’t told me what about me had changed his view after “eons” of hate.
“Lilith,” Azra said, running his finger under my chin to force me to look into his angelic gaze. “Tell me what’s on your mind.”
He held no reservations, no hesitation. His irises shone with an inner light when we were on holy ground. It made sense to me because this was his natural state, being among beautiful and heavenly things.
I was neither. A monster trapped in sheep’s clothing was all I was, and I still didn’t understand why Azra loved me as much as he did.
No, that wasn’t true. I suspected why he cared for me.
He needed me.
He and Sam had been half-dead when I’d found them in Purgatory’s ruins. It was only because of me that they had regained their source of power and rejuvenated their lives.
Angels sustained their power through worship, and for some reason, worshipping me worked for them. Maybe it was because I was a princess of Hell, or maybe it was because I was a Champion of Calamity.
For whatever reason it worked, I offered them something temporary that they could eventually find somewhere else.
“Well?” he pressed, not giving me a chance to think of a suitable lie. “What are you thinking?”
Glancing around the impressive garden, my heart pinched with the truth. “I’m thinking that once you find someone else more appropriate to worship, you’ll have the life you deserve.”
He froze, his entire body going hard. “Lilith,” he pressed, but I flinched away. “What do I have to do in order to prove my love for you is real?” He drew the cherry pit out of his pocket. “If I ate this, would you believe me?”
My eyes went wide. “What? No… That wouldn’t prove anything.”
He held very still, making my body tremble with fresh fear.
He wouldn’t.
Surely.
“I’d do anything for you, Lilith. I love you. And I’m going to prove it to you.”
He brought the black object to his mouth and I screamed. Diving for him, I released fire that only sputtered. I couldn’t summon Hellfire here, not on holy ground.
His throat worked as he swallowed.
I stared at him, stunned. “Why would you do that?” I screeched, slamming my fists against him. “Why, Azra?”
I didn’t want him to die.
Stupid angel.
Stupid beautiful Virtue.
“Just calm down,” Azra said, but I didn’t want to pretend that this was all going to work out anymore.
Now he was going to die and it was all my fault because I couldn’t convince him of the truth.
Flaring my wings, I allowed my demon’s talon to strike the nearby branches. Gorgeous strings of perfect limbs crashed to the ground, splattering the heavenly cherries everywhere.
The red juices leaked out, making it look like I had made the garden bleed onto the ground.
Dark claws extended from my fingertips when Azra stared at the carnage. He loved his creation, but this was all a lie. The sadness in his features twisted my heart, but I wasn’t going to let him die for me just to prove a point.
I had to stop this before I couldn’t undo it.
“Look at me, Azrael,” I said, flaring my wings again.
They’d only grown in size in the past three months.
My demon wing twitched, unused to my efforts of trying to control it.
It sliced through another set of branches and cherries fell onto me, splattering me with red juice.
“I need you to make that pit come back out before it does something to you, okay? This is all a lie. You’ve built a sanctuary in Hell.
Don’t you realize where you are?” I took a step back and summoned my Hell Crown with a thought.
It sizzled against the onslaught of power from the holy ground all around us and a wave of heat pinched in my chest.
Holding a hand to my stomach, I endured the pain as I held onto my darkness in a holy sanctuary.
I couldn’t lose Azra just because he refused to see the truth. I’d make him see it.
“It’s not a lie,” Azra pressed, his violet eyes flaring with determination. “And I can prove it.”
His wings fluctuated from white to grey, then spotted with black streaks as he spoke.
His jaw worked, betraying that he was in pain.
I dug my nails into my stomach that felt as if a knife was twisting and trying to come out. “Stop this, Azra. Just stop it and let me go, okay? I can’t do this anymore. I can’t let anyone else get hurt.”
Kaito had brought me here because he thought my angels would help balance me after failing to bond with Cole.
He was wrong. This was only making it worse.
“You ate a forbidden fruit and survived,” Azra told me as he knelt to one knee. “Only the divine can do that.”
“I… what?” I asked as my vision blurred with a golden sheen. “You let me eat a forbidden fruit?” I wasn’t sure what that was, but it didn’t sound good.
“Because I knew you were divine, Lilith. I would never doubt you. There was no danger to you because you are a goddess, or something close enough to one that you have all the right traits.” His jaw worked as his body shuddered with pain.
“It tells me what I knew already. You’re not the problem here. I am.”
“So that’s why you’re trying to kill yourself?” He was an angel, but he wasn’t a god. His skin had gone pale and a ruby gleam entered his amethyst eyes. If eating a piece of forbidden fruit was deadly to anyone who wasn’t a god, what did he think he was trying to prove?
What the ever-living-fuck was going on?
He cupped my face in his hand. “This will prove we’re compatible, Lilith, but you have to kiss me.” He leaned in, his lips hovering over mine. “Right. Fucking. Now.”
The ground trembled again, but it felt more like a rumble of Hell’s encouragement rather than damnation from the holy ground beneath us.
Pain twisted through my stomach again, but I couldn’t ignore Azra’s plea.
His gaze held adoration, loyalty, and a desire that I trust him just as he trusted me.
He’d do anything for me. Anything at all, even risk his immortal life trusting that I had the power of the divine to save him.
That I wasn’t evil incarnate.
That I was something even I didn’t believe.
That I was… good.
Pressing my lips to his, I hoped he was right… for his sake.