Twenty-Four.
Duke
“Fuck,” I roar, whipping the wrench across the garage. It hits the wall with an echoing clang. I stalk out the open garage door, and I head to the house— my house that was supposed to be ours. Maci and me.
Why didn’t I tell her?
She had every right to know. And I kept it from her.
I fucked up. And it might have cost me the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with. Because she’s it for me. I’d rather die alone than be with anyone else.
I kick off my boots at the door. Everything is a memory that reminds me of her. From picking out the cabinets, the countertops, to the paint, and flooring. Laughing until we cried over shit-stain brown carpet.
My chest clenches.
We should be on our babymoon getaway getting ready for dinner at a fancy, high-rise restaurant. The place where I was going to propose. Not…this. Where we’re taking—what? A break? Space? I don’t even know anymore.
I already feel like a stalker. I’ve been sleeping in my truck outside the cabin every night. Checking in on her at work, at home—I’ve followed her to the damn gas station, for fuck’s sake.
I’m losing it.
I go upstairs to my room to grab my phone off the charger when the same sight that’s been tearing me up inside catches my eye. Not able to stop myself, I walk across the hall into the pastel purple room—the matching wooden crib, dresser, changing table, the fuzzy purple rug, the decorative flowers and butterflies on the wall, the baskets of baby clothes that still need to be put away…and the glider rocking chair I put together last night.
My entire body hurts being in this room without Maci by my side.
I love her so much it hurts.
My gaze lands on the curtain and rod that needs to be hung. I wonder if I should do it while I’m in here, or if it even matters anymore.
A glance out the window shows a cloud of dust forming as my brother’s truck peels in the driveway. My brow furrows when he throws the truck in park, jumps out, and races over to the garage.
I scowl. What the hell does he want now?
I tug on my boots and step outside. “Where the fuck have you been?” he barks out, jogging toward me. “I’ve been calling you for the last hour.”
“Phone is on the charger,” I grunt.
“Maci’s at the hospital. She’s in labor.”
Time stops.
“Yeah, exactly,” he grumbles. “Get in the truck. We need to go. Now.”
A moment later, we’re on the road driving to the hospital. Butch’s phone rings, and he answers. “Yeah, I got him. We’re on our way,” he says. “We’ll be there as fast as we can.” He hangs up and hits the gas.
“Is she okay? What happened? What’d she say?” I rapid fire. Her due date isn’t for another two weeks. Dr. Sanderson told us she might go late due to Olivia being on the smaller side… Maci must be terrified. My heart pounds at the thought.
“My future wife is what happened,” my brother says with a rough chuckle. “I told her to stay out of it, but she was driving me off the wall worrying about you and Maci. So, I drove her to the coffee shop. Long story short, Maci’s water broke, and they’re saying she’s moving fast.”
“Fast? What does that mean?”
Butch shakes his head. “I don’t know, man. That’s what they said when we got her to the hospital. She was…in a lot of pain. Cassidy was freaking out trying to reach you. I…didn’t know what else to do.”
My leg jumps in time with my racing heart. “You got her to the hospital safe, bro. That’s all you could do.”
Butch whips around the loop at the front entrance, and I jump out before the truck comes to a full stop. I hit the elevator and get to the third-floor maternity ward. I look around, desperately trying to remember where they said to go during the tour we took four months ago.
A nurse buzzes me in, and I dart to the front desk. “Maci Baker. She was brought in an hour ago. She’s thirty-seven weeks, four days. Where is she?”
The nurse nods, typing on the computer, and popping her chewing gum louder than anyone legally should be allowed to.
I don’t have time for this.
A cry down the hall catches my attention, and I run toward it on instinct alone.
“Sir. Sir, you can’t go back there,” the nurse shouts, but I don’t stop.
Barreling into room eight, I lay sight to Maci doubled over on the edge of the hospital bed, clutching her belly in a pale pink gown. She’s hooked up to several machines as Cassidy holds a bucket in front of her.
“Maci,” I pant, rushing to her side.
“Excuse me, sir, you can’t—” a nurse in the room starts.
“He’s the father,” Cassidy states, glaring at the nurse.
Maci peers up at me. “Duke,” she cries, reaching for me.
My chest floods with emotions when I wrap my arms around her—a piece of my heart sliding back into place. “I’m right here, angel,” I say. “Everything’s going to be okay.”
“Here comes another one,” the nurse announces, watching a monitor off to the side.
Maci squeezes me tight with a hiss of pain. “It hurts.”
I rub her back, feeling how tense she is. “I know, doll. Breathe through it. Remember those classes? All that breathing they told you to do.” She nods against me and takes a deep inhale. “In through your nose, out through your mouth.”
She does her breathing, her arms squeezing my neck, and her forehead pressed against my chest. I rock her from side to side—I saw it in a movie once, and it seems to be doing something because she relaxes into me.
“You’re doing great, Maci,” the nurse tells her. “It’s coming down now.”
Maci blows out a long breath before leaning back to look at me. Her plump bottom lip quivers as her gaze darts over my face. I missed those big, green doe eyes. “I’m so sorry.”
“Shhh.” I push the hair out of her face that’s fallen from her messy bun. “You have nothing to be sorry for, beautiful. This is all my fault. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner,” I say. “But believe me when I say this—you mean everything to me, Maci. You could never replace anyone. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, angel. I love you. And I want to spend the rest of my life proving it to you.”
She takes my scruffy, unkept face in her hands, and kisses me softly in response.
I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of her touch, her scent, her kiss—her love. Her.
“I love you, too,” she whispers against my lips, and I feel it…
This is what forever feels like.
“We’ve got another one coming,” the nurse says, and Maci tenses as she works through her breathing.
“How far apart are we, Debbie?” Dr. Sanderson asks as she hurries into the room.
“Contractions are two minutes apart and just shy of a minute long.”
“All right, Maci. I’m going to have you finish this contraction, then I need you to lie back and we’ll check you again,” Dr. Sanderson says.
I help Maci to lie down, holding her hand as Dr. Sanderson checks her. “Eight centimeters dilated. Head is down.” She pushes on her stomach and shakes her head.
“Can I get the epidural now?” Maci pleads, squeezing my hand.
Dr. Sanderson pains a smile. “Oh, we’re long past that, dear.”
Maci whimpers when the nurse announces another contraction. Another nurse arrives to prep the room for delivery. Maci shifts onto her left side, a death grip on both my hands while doing her breathing as best she can. Cassidy’s holding a cool cloth to her forehead, and I’m doing my damnedest to stay strong for her—but I’m freaking out on the inside.
“When did you start having contractions, Maci?” Dr. Sanderson asks, staring at a paper in hand.
Maci hisses. “I-I don’t know. The last few days, I guess? I had a few light ones this morning. I thought they were Braxton Hicks, though.”
Dr. Sanderson walks around to face Maci. “I need you to listen to me as best you can, okay?” she starts, her tone serious in a calming way that only puts me on high alert. “What’s happening now is what we refer to as precipitous or rapid labor. That’s why you’re having such intense contractions. Your body is ready to force this baby out one way or another. Are you feeling the urge to push?”
Maci nods vigorously, her nails digging into my forearm as she blows out a jagged breath.
“You need to work through the contractions. Don’t push until you’re fully dilated. If you try now, you’ll risk tearing or harming the baby. Do you understand?”
“Y-Yes.”
“Now, you’re a little early, and that’s okay. The baby will be fine, but I need you to understand she’s going to be small, Maci.”
Maci nods, and Dr. Sanderson shifts her attention to the nurses, instructing them to get NICU on-call and ready for the baby if needed.
“Duke,” Maci says in a hushed whisper. “I’m scared.”
I kneel beside her. “I know, angel.” Her body starts to tremble as another contraction hits her. I rub her back, rocking her as she holds onto me. “You can do this, beautiful,” I say, kissing her temple. “I’ll be right here with you.”
“But we didn’t install the car seat yet,” she softly cries.
I fight back a chuckle. “I’ll take care of it.”
“I missed you.”
“Angel, I miss you every second of every minute when I’m not with you,” I tell her. “Enough to become a damn stalker according to Butch.”
“Maybe just a little bit.” She laughs lightly. “But I liked it.”
I chuckle. “Well, I hope you didn’t like it too much. I’ve been miserable not being beside you.”
Her glossy eyes shimmer. “I love you.”
“I love you more,” I say, kissing her tenderly.
Maci works through contractions for another painful half-hour before she’s fully dilated and ready to push. But she’s drained, exhausted from the intense, rapid labor. According to Dr. Sanderson, what Maci’s doing now in a mere few hours, takes women nearly twelve hours or more to accomplish.
I asked if there was an Olympic race for giving birth this fast… Unfortunately, the dad joke was not well received.
With Cassidy holding one of Maci’s legs, and me holding the other, Maci gets into position and starts to push.
“Perfect, Maci.” Dr. Sanderson nods in encouragement while a nurse counts down on the contraction. “Just like that. Keep going, keep going.”
She’s panting, sweating, a cool cloth over her forehead as she works to push. After roughly a dozen or so pushes…
“We’ve got a full head of hair.” Dr. Sanderson smiles. “Get ready, sweetie. Next contraction, I want a long, good push, okay?”
Maci has a look of pure determination on her beautiful face. And as the next contraction hits, she bears down, pushing long and hard with a silent scream in pain.
“Here she comes!” Dr. Sanderson catches Olivia. The faintest little wail fills the room, and my heart swells.
Maci sobs, reaching out as they place her baby on her bare chest. She’s tiny and perfect in every way. A nurse wipes Olivia’s eyes and face, draping warm blankets over them.
Maci glances at me with a beaming smile and tears in her eyes. I kiss her, tasting the salt of her tears mixed with mine. “I love you,” I choke out, overcome with emotions.
She peers down at Olivia nestled between her breasts and tucks the blanket softly under her chin. “And we…love you,” she whispers before gazing back at me.
I stand in front of the nursery room window, on strict orders from Maci to keep an eye on our little girl.
“She’s tiny,” Butch says lowly, his voice strained as we watch a nurse get a weight and length on Olivia. Her wails of protest are music to my ears.
Cassidy sniffles. “She’s absolutely beautiful.”
“Yeah. She is.” I rub my face, fighting back the tears, but I can’t.
Butch slaps a firm hand on my shoulder, bringing me in for a hug.
Cassidy fans her eyes. “Stop that.” She laughs. “You guys are going to make me lose it all over again.”
I sniff and wipe my eyes. “Think you can do me a favor, man?”
“You don’t even need to ask, brother. Just tell me where it is.”