Epilogue
Paisley
TWO YEARS LATER
“HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT Octavia?” Nash asks, his lips close to my ear as I sit in the sand between his legs, my back to his chest, watching the sun set over the Pacific Ocean.
“Octavia?” I snort out a laugh. “Sounds like some kind of fuel for machinery, not a name for a little girl.”
“It does not.” Nash chuckles, his hands sliding over my very pregnant belly.
I guess it’s safe to say, a lot has happened over the last couple of years.
Nash moved to California.
We got married three months later.
Bought a fixer-upper the next month and spent the next five months fixing it up.
Found out I was pregnant about six months after that.
Even though we had been trying, I still worried about Nash’s reaction when he found out. I shouldn’t have. I’ve never seen that man more excited than he was that day.
Shortly after that, we opened our own rescue center. After hearing me complain for far too long about the overcrowding at the rescue I was working at, Nash did what Nash does best. He found a way to give me what I wanted. He found an abandoned warehouse not far from our house and was able to talk the owner down to an affordable number for the monthly lease.
We were able to convert it into a usable space without too many hiccups and opened our doors shortly after I entered my second trimester. I handle most of the operations, while Nash does all the maintenance and rescue missions, though once the baby is born, I plan to join him as that is one of my favorite parts of the job.
It seems like a lot, I know, but somehow, we’ve been able to make it all work and still keep our sanity.
Nash found a local NA group in town. He still goes every week without fail. Sometimes, I like to go with him too. It helps me to understand him more, and ultimately, it’s only brought us closer. We’ve also met some really great people and made friends along the way.
Somehow, despite all that we’ve been through, everything has fallen into place perfectly, almost as if it were scripted by fate itself.
“What about Grace?” I suggest.
“Not unique enough.”
I feel him shake his head, even though I can’t see him.
Funny enough, our biggest obstacle to date is picking out a freaking baby name, which we can’t seem to agree on for the life of us.
“I bet Iris could help us. Surely she and Jonas went through something similar when they had to name not one but two girls.”
“I’ll admit, Lana isn’t too bad. But are you forgetting what they named their second daughter? No offense, but Iris is the last person I’m going to for baby name advice after that one.”
“Oh, come on, Elowen isn’t that bad.”
“Isn’t it?” He barks out a laugh.
“Okay, it isn’t great,” I admit, smiling to myself when our little one decides to grace us with her presence. “Did you feel that?” I look over my shoulder to see Nash, smiling from ear to ear.
“She’s strong, like her mama.” He kisses my forehead.
“And relentless like her daddy.” I grimace when she gets her foot into a rather uncomfortable spot and pushes. “I will say, as much as I have loved being pregnant, I am ready to have my body back.”
“Mmm, I’m ready to have your body back too.” He nips at my ear.
“Pretty sure you had my body this morning,” I remind him.
“Maybe I should have said, I’m ready to have your body all to myself again,” he corrects.
“Well, she’ll be here before we know it, and if we want her to have a name when her grandparents and Aunt Celine arrive, perhaps we should figure out what we’re going to call this beautiful daughter of ours.” I place my hands on top of Nash’s on my belly.
“Very true. Knowing your parents, they will try to name her for us.”
“Oh God, could you imagine?”
“They did pretty well with your name.”
“If you say so.” I roll my eyes even though he can’t see me.
“I happen to love Paisley. Try growing up with the name Nash. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been asked if I was named after the show Nash Bridges.”
“At least you’re not named after a pattern. A tear-shaped one at that.”
“Okay, so let’s both agree we won’t name any of our children after shapes or television shows.”
“Children, as in plural?” I glance over my shoulder at him a second time.
“Oh, baby, I’m going to knock you up as many times as I can.” He gives me a cheeky grin.
“As long as you’re one of those dads who changes diapers and gets up in the middle of the night, you can have whatever you want.” I press up to kiss his jaw.
“Are you kidding? I’m going to be a super dad. I grew up with the world’s shittiest father, so I know exactly what not to do.”
“He may have been shitty, but he raised the most beautiful man I’ve ever known.”
“He didn’t do that, you did.” His words send my already reeling emotions into overdrive.
“Are you trying to make me cry?”
“Never.” He helps me into an upright position. “We should get going before it’s so dark we can’t see our way home.” He pushes to a stand before moving to my front. Taking my hands, he pulls me upright.
“There are streetlamps the whole way. You realize this, yes?”
After helping to brush the sand from my backside, which he thoroughly enjoys, he takes my hand and kisses the back of my knuckles.
“You can never be too safe.”
“This pregnancy has made you soft,” I tease, bumping my hip into his.
“When you have something worth protecting, you protect it with everything you have.”
“Soft,” I repeat with a laugh.
“I’ve got it!” He throws his free hand up in a eureka type of way.
“What?” I look at him like he’s sprouted a second head.
“Emmalynn.”
“Emmalynn?”
“You and your sister’s middle names mashed together.”
“Emmalynn,” I repeat a second time. “Is it weird that I think I like it?”
“No, because it’s awesome.”
“Did we just decide on a name for our daughter?” I stop just as we reach the sidewalk, turning to face Nash.
“I think we did.” His smile is so genuine it lights up every inch of his face.
If there’s one thing that hasn’t changed over the last two decades, it’s this man’s ability to take my breath away.
“Emmalynn,” I say for a third time. “Celine is going to be thrilled.” I almost groan, though it’s all in good fun.
Celine and I are not as close as I’d like, but she no longer actively hates me, and little by little, we’re finding our way as sisters. Maybe this will be just the thing to suck her in.
“But are you? Are you happy?” He falls serious for a moment.
“Happier than I ever thought possible,” I say with complete honesty. “Are you happy?”
“Are you kidding? I’m married to you, aren’t I?”
“Ha. Ha,” I deadpan.
“I’m serious, P. Even when we were young and I pictured what my perfect slice of forever would look like, it didn’t hold a candle to the life I’m living here, with you.”
“You’re going to make me cry,” I warn, already feeling the waterworks coming on.
“Well, then let’s get you home so I can spend the rest of the night kissing away your tears... And other parts of you too.” He winks, pulling me into his side.
He’s right about one thing. When I thought about what our future would look like all those years ago, it didn’t even compare to what we have today.
The road to get here wasn’t easy. It was full of accidents and missed turns. At one point, I was convinced we weren’t even reading the same map anymore. What we failed to see at the time was we were on the same path all along, just following different directions.
But no matter where I went or how far the distance between us seemed, I always carried fragments of him with me, so really, it’s like he was with me all along.
Our love isn’t perfect, and we aren’t without our flaws, but at the end of the day, we will fight for each other every day, until our last day. Because that’s what it means to love someone with your whole self.
It means you can see past the mistakes. It means that you will enter the trenches and fight alongside them. It means that you are willing to die for them if that’s what it takes.
Sure, it’s terrifying, and yeah, maybe you’ll get hurt along the way. But when you find the person who makes the risk worth it, hold on for dear life and never let go.
I gave Nash Ketter my heart when I was too young to know what I was giving away. But what you may not have realized along the way is that he gave me his too. I still have it today, and I will cherish it forever...
Until my last breath.