Chapter 22 #2
Elana was a really good braider. She could braid her ass off.
She only did 1-2 heads a day, and she averaged $1,000 a week braiding.
She lived in a small two bedroom house when her and Diric met, and she drove a Nissan.
She was doing okay for herself, and he had no doubt she would be a good mother.
Elana smoked weed, she drank liquor, and she liked to do hood rat shit with her friends but when she got pregnant, all that stopped.
Diric hustled her entire pregnancy like a man on a mission.
She was taking a month off from braiding, and he was going to ensure that her nor his son wanted for anything.
Last month, he had given her enough money to pay her rent for six months.
The kind of house that Canyon lived in, it was Diric’s goal to have his son living in a house like that by his first birthday.
He wanted his son raised green and privileged.
Diric had been scrolling through his phone for about fifteen minutes, when he heard his son make a few grunts.
That led to crying, so Diric headed to the kitchen to grab his bottle.
After he placed it in the warmer, he picked his son up and cradled him in his arms. Kash was eating hungrily by the time Elana came from the bathroom.
She was dressed in blue pajamas, and she looked tired.
“So, is it going to be a lot of you giving me money and a little of you being here, or are you really going to help me?”
Diric looked over at her. He wasn’t trying to argue, so he was gon’ speak calmly to keep her from getting defensive.
“Money was coming like crazy. It’s the first of the month.
I’m sorry I missed him coming home, but I’m here now, and I’m not leaving back out until in the morning.
Your rent is covered for six months and that money I just gave you, should last a few months.
I’m gon’ be here for sure, but me being here don’t mean shit if my lil’ man isn’t taken care of.
You already said when you start back braiding hair, you’re going to have to pay your mom at least $400 a month to watch him, so her car payment will be covered.
I’d rather your mom quit her part-time job and watch him than him going to daycare.
So, I’ll pay your mom. My man gon’ be good. ”
That satisfied Elana, and she decided not to beef with him.
She was glad that Diric hadn’t taken her through any drama like her friend’s baby daddy.
Elana and her best friend were pregnant at the same time, and their pregnancies were totally different.
Every other month, Nadine’s dude was denying her baby, cheating, or doing other dumb shit.
She went to take a nap while Diric bonded with his son.
He took a nap too while Kash rested on his chest. Running the streets seventeen hours a day was catching up with him.
Diric was more at peace than he’d ever been with his son cuddled up on him.
For two months, he was there every day. He played a part in feeding his son, changing him, bathing him.
When Elana started back braiding hair, when her mom had something to do, Diric would come through and make sure his son was straight while Elana got to the money.
Life was good until one day around noon, his world changed forever.
He had just stepped out of the barbershop when Elana called him screaming and crying.
She was so hysterical that he couldn’t even make out what she was saying.
It took a neighbor getting on the phone and telling Diric that the ambulance had arrived.
Elana went to get Kash out of his crib and found that he wasn’t breathing.
Diric was lost, and he was confused. How was his lil’ man just not breathing?
He had been fine earlier that morning. For a brief moment, he wondered if it was something that Elana did, but he quickly scratched that.
She was a good mother, and she loved her son.
She wouldn’t even let her friends and family hold Kash if they smelled like weed or cigarettes.
Just like he didn’t play ‘bout Kash, she didn’t either.
Diric choked back tears as he drove towards the hospital.
There had to be some mistake. This wasn’t right. Ain’t no way in hell this was right.
It took the doctor explaining to them that sometimes, babies just stop breathing in their sleep.
There was no real explanation, and it happened way too often.
That was it? His son simply stopped breathing?
His mom was there, and Elana’s mom was there, and they were comforting her.
Diric walked out to his car, slammed the door, and broke down.
He only got to be with his son for two fuckin’ months.
If God was gon’ take him after two months, why even let them have him?
The shit wasn’t fair. Diric cried until he couldn’t cry anymore.
He turned his phone off, and he went straight to the liquor store.
All Elana did was cry. He couldn’t even comfort her because every time he went home, her friends and family were there.
So, he stopped going home. Sometimes, he would sleep at the trap, he would get a hotel room, or he would stay with other women.
Him and Elana’s relationship went to shit.
Diric’s temper was out of control. A nigga bumped into him in the corner store and before he could say excuse me, Diric had beaten him to a bloody pulp.
That’s how it was for months. She walked around sad, and he walked around mad at the world.
Their relationship slowly withered away.
That’s why Diric was confused one night when she made a move on him.
They had sex, but that wasn’t the shocker.
He knew she wasn’t on birth control, but she requested that he didn’t pull out.
It had only been three months since Kash passed.
Diric was caught up in the moment, so he didn’t pull out, but he questioned her about it afterwards. “You went and got on birth control?” he asked with furrowed brows.
“No. But, I want another baby.”
Confused, he continued to ask questions. “What you mean you want another baby, Elana? It’s only been three months. You ready to go through a pregnancy and all that again?”
“Yes. How long do I have to wait?”
“I don’t know how long you have to wait, but I’m still grieving my son. I’m not just gon’ get you pregnant again like another baby will make this shit go away. Another baby won’t replace Kash.”
“I didn’t say another baby would replace him. I know he can’t be replaced. That doesn’t mean I don’t want another baby. I only got to be a mother for two months!”
“I’m not doing this.” Diric stood up and began getting dressed.
He couldn’t tell her how to feel, but he didn’t want another baby at the moment.
He loved Kash with everything in him, and he wasn’t ready to fall in love that deep all over again.
All the nights that his mother and his grandmother fussed.
Worried about him and prayed for him. He finally saw how it felt to be scared for another human.
He was willing to do whatever it took to protect Kash from other people, but he couldn’t protect him from fate, and that shit hurt.
He didn’t have the energy to put into another pregnancy.
Elana’s hormones were over the place, but he dealt with her mood swings because his son was the bigger picture.
He wasn’t in the frame of mind to do that shit again.
Her being pregnant again wouldn’t suddenly make his hurt go away.
Diric left the house and the next time he went back, it was to get his things. He was no longer interested in being in a relationship. All he wanted to do was smoke, drink, and get money.
Diric’s anger issues had gotten a little better over the years but not by much.
He closed his eyes when he pictured how he choked Raven.
He was out of pocket for that shit, but she had pissed him off.
That wasn’t an excuse though. Diric let out a small sigh and picked his phone up from the cupholder.
He’d see if Omnique still wanted the dick. That would distract him.