Chapter Seven
Reilly
WHY DO I continue to get myself into these situations? I have barely slept all night, trying to wrap my head around just how I’m going to get through a whole date with Bray tonight. Luckily, it’s a double date with Holly and that creepy-ass Simon, the PE teacher from her school.
I’ve met Simon before, a couple of times when I’ve been out with Holly and she’s ran into him.
The guy gives me the creeps. I can’t point my finger on what it is, but I just get those vibes from him.
If Holly’s date was with anyone else, I probably would have fought the whole Bray tagging along thing and found myself someone else to go with.
I’ll never admit this to anyone, but I do feel a weird sense of peace knowing that Bray will be there.
I have no doubt that he would come across as intimidating and protective of Holly while in the company of her creepy date.
Why the hell she’s even agreed to go out with him, I will never know.
But because she’s my sister and I love her, and the fact that she dates only once in a blue moon, I will go along with this shamble of a date tonight.
First, I need to find some inner grounding.
I need to rebuild the walls back up around my damn heart.
Every time I get a glimpse of Bray, another brick comes tumbling down, letting him seep into places he has no business being.
I’ve spent the last five years mortaring and rendering those bricks to ensure they are firmly in place.
I’m not about to let Bray bulldoze them down.
I need a plan, a bloody good one to survive a whole night with his torture.
Yesterday was bad enough. I spent the day shopping with Alyssa, Sarah, Holly and Ella, and guess who Zac made tag along with us?
Yep, you guessed it, Bray fucking Williamson.
I had to endure a whole day of his constant charm and good fucking looks.
I don’t understand how one person can be as blessed in the looks department as that asshole is.
The whole day he was constantly next to me, or close enough that I could smell him.
I thought I was going crazy; I was turned on the whole damn day and by the looks he kept giving me, he knew what his close proximity was doing to me.
Then there was the whole dressing room scene.
Some bastard slipped through all of us unnoticed, managing to slip a picture under the door of the dressing room Alyssa was in.
The soul-piercing scream that came from behind her door is still ringing in my head.
I cannot get that sound out of my thoughts.
I’ve never been so scared for one of my friends in all my life.
Sarah and I both tried to get her to open the door for us. Bray came running in from the front of the store and straight away got her to open the door, only to then push himself into the room with Alyssa and shut the door behind them. I felt a strange mixture of jealousy and a calmness at that.
I was jealous that he was in a dressing room with my friend while she was in her underwear, my bloody hot as sin friend.
At the same time, as I listened to him talk to her, I heard him coaxing her into her clothes on the other side of the door and talking her out of her panic.
I felt a sense of calmness and relief that my friend had some great people in her corner.
She needs this; she needs people like the Williamsons in her life.
We spent the rest of the afternoon in a wine bar.
I may have had a little too much to drink, again.
I had Holly take me home earlier than everyone else with the excuse that we had a family thing to do.
Sarah and Alyssa both knew that we were bullshitting.
They know of our shitty family circumstances.
They know the only family we have now is our mum.
We both still live at home with her, neither of us wanting to leave her alone.
She’s strong, probably one of the strongest women I know, to survive the last five years how well she has.
She picked herself up off of that courtroom floor five years ago and dusted off her dress, straightened her shoulders and told both Holly and me that we would be fine.
That we would get through this together.
And survive we did. We have a great relationship and usually I talk to her about everything.
But I’ve been holding back talking to her about Bray, partly because I know what she’s going to say.
She’ll tell me to open my heart to the possibility.
That the best thing that ever happened to her was meeting my dad.
Even today, she has stayed loyal to him.
He’s facing at least another ten years in jail, but my mum is waiting. She won’t even contemplate moving on.
She won’t visit him in jail. She says that her heart hurts too much to see him locked up like an animal. They write to each other every day and that’s how they have managed to stay connected all these years.
I’ll be seeing my dad today. Maybe he can help talk me out of these stupid feelings I’m catching.
I’m the only one who visits my dad. On the first Sunday of each month, I make my trek down to the Silverwater Correctional Facility.
I make a day of it, first visiting my dad and then my brother to tell him all about what’s been happening.
Deciding this is exactly the day I need in order to re- ground my inner self, I throw the blankets off and get moving.
First coffee, then shower, then car. I mentally give myself a list to get on with.
I will not think of the pierced cucumber or the body and mind that come with that pierced cucumber today.
Which is a shame. I really would like to be better friends with junior—we could be best friends.
Maybe Bray will let me do one of those moulding kits, where you can make a dildo from the mould of your penis.
Huh, I wonder if you can add piercings to those vibrators?
The more I think of it, the more appealing the idea is.
There is just no way in hell I am going to ever ask Bray to do a moulding of junior for me.
Coffee, I need coffee. I need to think of coffee and not that damn pierced cucumber!
The guards at the correctional facility all know me by name.
I’ve even become friends with one of them, Dave.
He’s big, buff and a total meathead, but somehow, we managed to build a little friendship.
We text each other stupid cat videos. He makes me send him pictures of my dates before I go out with guys—he says it’s a safety thing.
I just go along with it, because he doesn’t judge the volume of pictures that I’ve sent him over the years.
He also always checks in the next morning, checking if I’m still alive, his words not mine.
Dave is yet another person I haven’t made mention of Bray to. Not that there is anything to mention.
“Rye Rye, you’re early, babe. It’s good to see you.”
Dave greets me with a hug.
“You too. I have a lot going on today so I needed to come a bit earlier,” I say as I start filling in the visitor information forms.
“Give me a sec. I need to organise a few more guys for the visiting room. I wasn’t expecting you this early.”
“Dave, you don’t need any extra guards in there just because I’m here. I come every month and nothing ever happens. What do you think is going to happen?”
He raises his eyebrows at me in question, waiting me out.
“Oh please, it was one time, and that was like three years ago,” I tell him defiantly.
“One time? Really, Reilly? One time, where there was a literal riot in the visiting room because one inmate made a comment about you, making the rest of them pounce on him. It took twenty guards to separate that fight. Twenty.”
“It wasn’t that bad—you’re exaggerating.”
“Doesn’t matter. Wait here for a minute, and stay out of trouble.
I’ll be back to take you through myself.
” He leaves me waiting at the counter as he swipes himself through the door I know leads to the visiting room.
I hate this place, and I hate that my dad is stuck in this place.
It’s dreary and depressing. My dad needs me though.
He won’t admit it, but I know he looks forward to my monthly visits.
Five minutes later, Dave comes back out, holding the door open and calling my name.
He waits for me to enter and then follows behind me.
Two steps into the room and I freeze. Something is wrong.
I have that weird feeling in the pit of my stomach; one I’ve been getting lately whenever Bray is around.
I thought I was getting sick for a while until I put it down to that pierced cucumber messing my system up.
I look around the room frantically. Dave has his hand on his taser, looking at me with concern written all across his face.
“What’s wrong?” he asks as he scans the room.
I look around the room, trying to shake off the feeling, but then my eyes land on the source.
I’m caught in an eye lock with Bray. I’m in shock—he is the last person I thought I would run into here.
Why the hell is he here? I see he’s about to stand up, but I shake my head no at him and continue walking to my dad’s table.
Just as I’m about to sit, Dave stops me with his hand around my arm, halting me.
“Rye, do you know Bray? And if so, how?” he whispers close to my ear.
“It’s fine, Dave. I know him. I work for his brother’s club. I told you about my new job.”
“You forgot to mention it was at The Merge, Reilly,” he accuses.
“Did I?” I shrug like it’s no big deal. I totally purposefully forgot to mention I was working at The Merge. Dave has told me over and over again not to go there. Why? I don’t know. But I’m guessing it has something to do with Bray being a visitor here.
“We will talk about this later,” he says as he moves to the closest wall to where my dad’s table is.