Chapter 26
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
annalise
My heart and soul were set ablaze when Maddox’s lips touched mine again. It’s been years, and no one has even come close to making me feel the way he does.
I’ve been in a constant state of denial since he came back into my life. I haven’t wanted to believe that he could still have that much power over me. My head, my heart, my body… They all ache for his touch.
Every inch of me craved Maddox in that elevator, even though my mind was shouting at me to run the other direction. But there was this primal want—primal need—that refused to be silenced.
When his hands drifted down, exploring and grabbing like he used to, I was putty.
There was no way to deny how badly I needed him and his expert touch.
It was clear to me almost immediately that he remembers exactly how to fulfill my every desire.
Every stroke of his fingers inside me, every flick of his tongue over my clit, had me wondering how I’ve gone so long without experiencing the earth-shattering orgasms that only he is capable of giving me.
Because he cheated. He broke your heart.
And he’ll do it again the second you give him the chance.
Shit…
“That shouldn’t have happened,” I say, shaking my head and holding my fingers to my lips.
“What?” His face morphs into sadness, brows dipping together. “Annalise, you can’t mean that.”
He reaches out for me but I pull away from his touch at the last second. Squaring my shoulders, I swallow the boulder in my throat and look him dead in the eye.
“I shouldn’t have kissed you.” My arms wrap around my middle in a desperate attempt to protect myself from the man who already destroyed my heart once.
“And I definitely shouldn’t have let things go as far as they did.
I don’t want you getting the wrong impression.
There’s no chance for us again, Maddox.”
The lie tastes like venom on my tongue, but I need to say it for the sake of my heart.
“No,” he spits, shaking his head and taking a giant step toward me. “Fuck that.”
“Excuse me?”
“Fuck that, Annalise. I refuse to believe that you truly think what happened in there was a mistake. I know you felt exactly what I did.”
“I didn’t,” I deny. “It was a momentary lapse in judgment.”
“You’re saying that if I were to kiss you again”—he steps closer—“right here in front of everyone, you could honestly tell me that you would feel nothing?”
The look on his face tells me that he isn’t bluffing.
I open my mouth to respond but Veronica pops her head out of the office, glaring at me.
“Ms. Monroe, stop distracting Mr. Kamado and get to work!”
“Yes, Ms. Zhang.”
As soon as I leave here tonight, I’m going to look for another job. I can’t keep working at Dauntless and run the risk of being alone with Maddox again. I don’t trust myself. He came too close to destroying the shield around my heart—the one that’s only there because of him.
It was easier to protect myself when he wasn’t a part of my life, but now… it’s damn near impossible. My feelings for Maddox grow the more I’m around him, and I don’t want it to get to the point where I can no longer contain them.
It was bad enough having my heart crumble at the hands of him once. I don’t think I’d survive if I gave him the chance to do it again.
“What’s on your mind, mi rosa?” Abuelo asks. We’re at the infusion center where he gets chemotherapy.
The last few days, I haven’t been getting enough rest. My mind keeps replaying the kiss I shared with Maddox. “Nothing, Abuelo.” I place my hand on top of his weathered one, giving it a light squeeze. “I just had a very long week.”
He gives me a pointed look. “I raised you. You really think you can lie to me without me noticing?”
I don’t answer him. Instead, I face the TV and pretend to be interested in whatever the weatherman is saying.
“We have four hours to kill. Talk to me,” he urges.
I release a sigh. I know that if I don’t tell him, he will keep bugging me about it. “It’s Maddox… He’s back in my life, and things have gotten so complicated.”
Abuelo sits up straighter, brows shooting up in surprise. “He is? Where did you see him?”
“At Dauntless. He partnered with the company for a collab. I feel like I’m being punished. Not only do I have to work for La Diabla, but I have to see my ex again.”
“What ever happened between you two? I know it took more than distance for a couple like you two to break up.”
Wringing my hands together, I stare down at my lap as painful memories flash through my mind. “On our anniversary… I flew to Chicago to surprise him and saw Charlotte Jones come out of his room wearing his clothes. He… he cheated on me, Abuelo.”
Abuelo taps his chin, his face unreadable. “Hmm.”
Hmm? That’s all he’s going to say? I was expecting him to start cursing and shouting in Spanish. Anything other than hmm.
“Charlotte Jones. Isn’t she the mean girl that was jealous of you and Maddox?”
“Yes. The same one. Why?” I ask, furrowing my brows.
“Just wondering.” Abuelo shrugs. “So, what happened after you saw her? Where was Maddox?”
“He was still sleeping. I confronted her and she confessed that she slept with him. Said she only did it because he told her we weren’t together anymore. I kept this from you and Mami because I was so crushed. It’s still hard for me to talk about it now.”
I check to see if Abuelo has fallen asleep because it’s been a good minute since he responded, but he’s wide awake and wearing the same unreadable expression.
Abuelo shakes his head. “Maddox loved you more than anything, Annalise. I don’t think he would throw it all away after everything you two built.”
“But he did, Abuelo. And I made the mistake of kissing him again the other day. I’m so stupid.”
“Oh, mi rosa. You are not stupid.” He reaches over and gives my hand a squeeze. “I know seeing what you did hurt you, but I think there may be more to the story.”
“No, there isn’t. He cheated on me. I don’t care how many times he denies it. I know he did. That’s all men do. They lie.”
He crosses his arms. “So you’re calling your abuelo a liar now, too?”
“No!” I groan. “You don’t count. You’re one of the few good ones in the world.”
Leaning his head back on the recliner, he lets out a long sigh. “A love like the one you had with Maddox is rare to come by. Him being back in your life isn’t a punishment, mi rosa. This is all part of God’s plan—for you to rekindle the love that was lost. Perhaps you need to hear him out.”
I’d convinced myself that Maddox betrayed me. That we were over. Since he came back into my life, he has shown how much he cared for me through his actions, and he’s reminded me of the love we once had. It has me questioning if he was ever truly capable of cheating on me.
Over the last four years, I’ve been so consumed by anger and hatred that I didn’t allow him to tell me his side of the story.
Abuelo is right. I need to hear Maddox out.
With shaking hands, I pull out my phone and begin typing a message.
Hey. Can we talk tonight?
My heart races as I hit send. I anxiously await his response, knee bouncing up and down, each passing second feeling like an eternity.