Chapter 30
McKenzie spent Jax’s naptime completing her initial assessment of Duke’s books and made a list of recommendations for streamlining processes.
The good news was that his records weren’t in terrible shape.
The bad news was he owed estimated quarterly state and federal taxes that were overdue and accumulating penalties.
He needed to take care of that as soon as possible, and she hoped that wouldn’t be a problem for him.
Next, she spent an hour reconciling Sierra’s bank statements and posting journal entries to her general ledger.
She made a list of recommendations for her, which included separating her personal and corporate expenditures by procuring a corporate credit card that offered points or cash rewards.
The commingling of personal and professional made for messy accounting, which she explained to Sierra in an email that included a list of credit cards that would suit her business.
The work made her feel useful and productive.
When she was finished, she made notes about the time she’d spent on both accounts.
She wouldn’t bill Duke for any work she did for him, but she added an hour and a half to Sierra’s tab for month-end billing.
Figuring out her hourly rate was on her to-do list.
She stood to stretch just as the first squeak came from Jax.
Smiling, McKenzie went to retrieve him, freeing him from the car seat and lifting him into her arms. He was sweaty from sleeping and snuggled her as always when he first woke up. “How’s my best buddy?”
“Bud.”
“Yes, you’re my bud!”
“Bud.”
McKenzie put him on the bed to change him and took full advantage of the opportunity to place noisy kisses on his belly that provoked the laughter she loved so much.
When she first realized she was pregnant with him, she’d been terrified.
She and Eric hadn’t spoken about having children and had been careful to prevent pregnancy.
To this day, she had no idea what had gone “wrong,” but once the fear had subsided, she’d been excited.
Until she’d told Eric, and all her excitement died a painful death.
She’d been shocked, devastated and terrified after he left her to deal with the baby on her own.
A few bleak weeks had followed, along with debilitating nausea that had made it nearly impossible to work.
Moving back in with her mother had been a new low.
But a funny thing had happened as her baby had grown inside her. The excitement had come back, and then after he was born, she’d experienced the most profound feelings of pure joy that she’d ever known. Jax might’ve been “an accident,” but he’d become the happiest accident of her entire life.
She gave him a bath and changed him into pajamas. Then she took a quick shower and packed up what they needed to spend the night at Duke’s.
Spend the night at Duke’s.
She had no doubt they’d pick up where they’d left off the night before, and the very thought of it made her scalp and various other parts tingle with anticipation.
Every minute they spent together took them a step down the path toward something significant. Was she ready for that? Was he? Before him, she would’ve said no way, no how. The last thing she needed was another man in her life. But this man… He was different. Her unicorn, her one-in-a-million.
She was so tempted to jump right in with both feet—case in point: packing a bag to spend the night—but they needed to have a conversation about where this was headed, because it wasn’t just about them.
Jax was part of the equation, too, and as such, she needed to make sure they were on the same page.
Carrying Jax and her backpack, she went downstairs and across the yard.
He had music playing, loudly, so he didn’t hear her knock.
In the kitchen, she found him singing along to “Tennessee Whiskey” as he stood watch over something on the stove, his hips keeping time with the song.
For a moment, she was struck dumb by the realization that she was more than halfway in love with him—and that was before he sensed her there, turned and smiled with his whole face. Yeah, she was probably more than halfway in love.
He reached out to take Jax from her and continued to dance around the kitchen, delighting her little boy with his singing and his moves. “You gotta love Chris Stapleton. What a voice.”
“I do love him.” And you. I love you, too. But she couldn’t say that. It was far too soon for such things, and besides, who knew if he even wanted a little insta-family?
The insecurities hit hard, one right after the other. Every man left. Her father had left. Eric had left. Others before him… How did anyone who’d been through that ever take a chance on someone new?
“Something wrong, sweetheart?”
His voice tugged her out of the deep thoughts.
“No, just thinking.”
He turned down the music. “About what?”
“Everything.”
“That’s a lot of thinking.”
“Yeah, it is.”
“Look what I found sitting on the side of the road today.” He gestured to a high chair in the corner that she hadn’t noticed. “Cleaned it up and tightened the screws so it’s safe for Jax.”
McKenzie was so shocked, she could barely think, let alone speak.
“What do you say we give it a whirl, Mr. Jax?” Duke settled her son into the chair and put a couple of animal crackers on the tray that immediately grabbed the baby’s attention.
With Jax occupied, he came over to McKenzie, singing along to Chris singing “Think I’m In Love With You.” He held out his arms, inviting her to dance with him, and her heart was completely and absolutely lost to this dream of a man.
He held her close as he sang and moved her around the kitchen.
“Whatever you’re thinking or stressing about, knock it off.
I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere as long as you and Jax want to be with me.
I hope you want to be with me for a very long time, because I’ve never felt better than I do when you’re in my arms.”
McKenzie melted into him, swept away by his words, the song lyrics, the way they moved together like they’d been dancing forever rather than this being the first time. The high chair had been the kicker, she would decide later. The absolute send-her-over-the-edge kicker.
“How did you bring a high chair home on a motorcycle?”
“Carefully.”
“You’re too much.”
“I saw the one from the cabin in the dumpster, so I thought it might help to grab that one.”
“It’s a huge help. Thank you for doing that and for cleaning it up and making it safe for him.”
“I loved doing it.” He pulled her in even closer to him, letting her feel what her nearness had done to him. “Tell me what you’re worried about.”
“I don’t want to make another bad decision.”
“Does this feel like a bad decision to you?”
She shook her head. “Not even kinda.”
“And that’s a problem?”
“Everything is perfect until it isn’t.”
“I can’t promise it’ll be perfect. Hell, what fun would that be?
All I can tell you is I’m as into you as I’ve ever been with anyone.
And yes, I know you and Jax are a package deal.
If you’d asked me a few weeks ago if I was ready to be a dad, I would’ve laughed.
What the hell do I know about being anyone’s father?
But now… Today, I saw a high chair by the side of the road and grabbed it for Jax because he needs one, and I’m sure they don’t sell ’em on the island anywhere. ”
McKenzie looked up at him with the start of tears in her eyes. “That’s literally the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for us.”
“No way.”
“Other than giving us a place to live, that is.”
“Aw, that was nothing.”
“It was everything to us.”
He kissed away her tears. “I don’t want you to worry about anything where I’m concerned. I’m right here, and I’m not going anywhere as long as you want me around.”
“I want you around.”
“Is it scary to admit that?”
“Not as scary as it would be with anyone other than you.”
Jax started banging on the tray, demanding more crackers.
Duke laughed as he released her to go to him. “I like how he tells us what he wants.”
“I hear we’ll be wishing he’d hush up in no time at all.”
“I can’t wait to hear what he has to say.”
“There you go again. Being sweet.” As she fed Jax cereal and the peas he loved, McKenzie was awash in the strongest feelings she’d ever had for another human being—other than Jax, of course.
But these were different feelings. These were full of giddy hope, sweet anticipation and excitement for a future that looked so much brighter than it had before Duke.
He served her a salad with an array of dressings. “Wasn’t sure what you like.”
“So you bought them all?”
“I bought three.”
“I like them all.”
“Then they won’t go to waste.”
“And you bought animal crackers.”
“My buddy loves them.”
“Yes, he does.”
He went to the stove and returned with plates for each of them. “My own creation—seasoned ground beef, pasta, tomatoes and sauce.”
“It looks and smells delicious.”
“It always does when you don’t have to make it.”
“You’re spoiling me.”
“And loving every second of it. Oh, I forgot. There’s bread, too.”
After things blew up with Eric, she’d had to force herself to eat for her sake and the baby’s. Even after Jax arrived, she’d still struggled to eat with her nerves in a constant uproar.
The second she caught a whiff of the meal Duke had made, she was ravenously hungry for the first time in longer than she could remember. She took a bite, and the flavors exploded on her tongue, making her want more. “This is so good.”
“I’m glad you like it.”
“I have news about your books.”
“Ugh, is it gonna give me heartburn?”
“Not unless you don’t have the money in an account I don’t know about to pay your overdue estimated quarterlies.”
“I’ve got the money.”
“Then no heartburn. You should pay them tomorrow because you’re accruing penalties with every day that goes by.”
“I’ll take care of it in the morning.”
“I’ll send you the info you need by email.”
“Thank you. Can we not mention it again until then?”
She laughed as she nodded. “My lips are sealed.”
“Well, don’t do that.”