13 CONFLICT OF INTEREST #2
He pulled out suddenly and tugged on her hair, drawing her to her feet.
She went readily, eager to offer her surrender.
In everything else in her life, she was authoritative, in command of others.
Yet here, when it was just them, she shed that mask and gave in to the urges deep inside that longed to be soft and under another’s control.
But only his control.
He was the only one who would ever see her like this.
“On your back,” he told her, and she obeyed, stretching out on the bed.
She wanted to hold him, to feel his warm, textured skin against her palms as he moved inside her. But she held her tongue. More than that, she wanted to do as she was told.
Maybe it was forbidden, but this was a safe space for her to feel whatever secret feelings she hid normally, and she allowed them free rein.
Without censure. Without shame.
“What do you want, my sunshine?” he asked, crawling over her. Palms planted on either side of her head, he held his body off her, his heavy shaft hanging in the space between them, so close to her dripping center.
She placed a hand on his scaled chest, over his heart. He had given her permission to voice her wants, so she did. “I desire you to enter me like this, so I may hold your body close to mine.”
Those golden eyes burned with passion and love. Love for her, as she had for him. In her life of uncertainty, it was the only constant, the one assurance she had, and it meant everything to her.
“And I want to grant your every desire,” he said, and he lowered his body over hers.
Parting her thighs, Shamsiel drew up her legs to make space for him to enter her. This act was forbidden for an angel, even more so with a demon, but she had burned that bridge long ago. And as he sank inside her, slowly, inch by agonizing inch, she felt no regret and knew she never would.
She threw her head back and cried out as he filled her, feeling his weight settle over her just as she had wanted.
Her palms ran hungrily over his broad back, the silky feathers of his wings teasing the backs of her hands.
His hips started to move, and the same ridges she had stroked with her tongue now stroked inside of her, heightening her pleasure.
“You’re mine,” he said, sliding a hand into her hair and pulling her head back. “My little ray of sunshine.”
He filled her completely, in a way no one but he could do, in a way that went deeper than just their physical bodies. The pressure mounted, and her head spun as she cried out his name, begging for mercy and for more at the same time—
Sunshine jolted awake, finding herself sitting upright before she was even aware of where she was. Her heart pounded, her skin was electrified, and the fabric of her underwear between her legs was soaked through.
The cave. Its now-familiar walls surrounded her, reminding her where she was and how she’d gotten there. The room was dark, the shutters having been closed over the windows, and the fire burned low enough that it cast only a faint glow.
Her hand lifted to her mouth as the recollection of her dream passed through her mind. How on earth had she come up with such a scenario? Even subconsciously, it was … obscene.
Yes, she felt desire for Raum, she couldn’t deny it, but to have such a startlingly vivid dream that caused her to awaken in a state of maddening arousal … Nothing like that had ever happened to her before.
She recalled the feeling of him sinking into her, the stretch and the almost unbearable pressure, and before she knew what she was doing, the hand covering her mouth was sliding down her body and into her pants, dipping into the slick soaking her core.
She hadn’t touched herself like this in …
She couldn’t remember the last time. Had she ever?
Touching her body in the past was clinical, practical.
To clean and dress. It was not a vehicle of pleasure, and that had always been fine with her.
An angel didn’t feel such desires. She was above them. In control.
But then she remembered that feeling of total surrender in the dream, of looking into Raum’s eyes and trusting him to take care of her, and of handing him the reins and obeying his deep voice, and suddenly, her fingers were sliding over the bundle of nerves at the top of her vulva and finding it already swollen and sensitive.
And wet .
Her breaths came in sharp pants as she circled it, eyes fluttering from the pleasure. Sensation erupted, heating her skin and making it pebble with goosebumps at the same time. It felt … incredible.
She recalled the tears stinging her eyes as Raum forced his hard shaft deep into her mouth, his body covered in the scales of his half-demon form …
including his erection. Scandalized by the image her subconscious had conjured, she nevertheless felt a spike in arousal, heat scalding her, blood rushing —
“Sunshine?”
She ripped her hand away, chest heaving from how close she’d been to climax, and sat up in the bed, horrified to find Raum himself lying right next to her. She’d been so lost to her fantasy, she hadn’t even noticed him until then.
“Why am I in bed?” she asked as she finally took note of her surroundings.
“You fell asleep on the way back, so I put you in the bed. Your weapons are on the table, your boots are by the door, and I cleaned the ashes off you.” He was back in human form, though it was difficult to see in the near darkness.
The dying firelight reflected off his golden eyes as he peered up at her.
He’d taken her holsters and shoes off? And … cleaned her? “Why are you in the bed with me?”
Even half asleep, his brow furrowed with his scowl. “Because I was tired too.”
“But …”
“You want me to sleep on the floor?”
“No.”
“Well, then.”
She stared at him. Her fingers were still wet from her arousal. Her clitoris still throbbed, her head still pounded. She felt like he could see straight through her and worried he knew exactly what she’d been doing.
Worse, the arousal hadn’t left despite the inconvenient interruption. It was still there, pulsing like a heartbeat between her thighs. And she couldn’t stop the sound of Raum’s voice, rough from sleep, reminding her of the words he’d spoken in the dream. I want to grant your every desire.
“Go back to sleep, Sunshine.”
Mumbled in his raspy voice, the words seemed intimate. Something one lover might say to another. It was too close to the dream, too close to tempting the mind-fogging desire still hot in her blood.
“This is … I should not sleep in a bed with you.”
Raum rolled over to his side, facing her, but his eyes were closed now. He wasn’t wearing a shirt, she realized. Why wasn’t he wearing a shirt? “I won’t tell if you don’t. Or sleep on the floor if you want.” His words got progressively more slurred as he sank back into sleep.
He was right. She was overthinking this.
He didn’t know she’d just had a frighteningly vivid erotic dream about him, so of course he’d think there was nothing wrong with them sharing a bed.
And maybe, if she was silent and let him fall asleep again, she could finish what she started with her fingers—
No , she could not engage in such an act while lying beside him. She shouldn’t even be entertaining the idea.
Slowly, she lowered herself back to the pillow and lay on her back, eyes wide open as she stared at the ceiling. The dream repeated on a loop through her mind.
“Relax,” Raum mumbled. “You’re so tense, it’s making the bed shake.”
“I’m trying. But it’s a little hard with—”
He leaned in suddenly, far too close. When she dared to glance at him, his eyes were open and inches from her face. He was frowning.
Her heart gave a particularly violent jolt, and the wetness between her thighs made itself even more apparent. She’d never felt so exposed in her life, and she could only pray he didn’t discover her secret.
“You smell like …” He reached over and snatched her hand. The right one, the one that had been between her legs.
Before she grasped his intent, he brought it to his nose. She yanked to free it from his grip, but it was too late. She saw his eyes flare. Mortification suffused her, and she sat up again, eager to escape.
The damned demon grabbed her by the waist and pinned her back down on the bed. Had she enjoyed his domineering ways in the dream? Because she wasn’t now.
“What are you doing?” she demanded, trying to sound furious and not overwhelmed.
He held her down with only one hand, and a part of her knew she could escape if she really wanted. “My sense of smell’s not that good compared to some, but I know what I just scented on your fingers.”
Denial rose in her throat. Lies bounced around her brain, and she searched for one that would be most believable.
In the end, her pride won out. It wasn’t about extricating herself from the situation anymore, it was about regaining the upper hand.
Still, she surprised herself when she said, “It’s not for you.”
His eyes darkened into molten pits. Anger or arousal, she couldn’t tell. “Not for me, huh?”
“No,” she said haughtily, but her chest heaved with breath.
“Who’s it for then? Another demon you met today? Or some pretty angel boy who can’t even get it up?”
She bit her tongue, refusing to rise to the bait. But she couldn’t pull her gaze away from his even when she tried.
“Did you kiss someone else I don’t know about, Sunshine?” His tone was mocking. “Do you make a habit of kissing random men to manipulate them—”
“I haven’t kissed anyone!” she snapped, her temper getting the best of her.
“Except for me.”
She ground her teeth.
“And now you’re wet.”
Her nostrils flared. Why, oh why , did another spike of arousal pulse through her at that moment?
“For me.”
Her next inhalation shook slightly.
“Admit it.” His eyes were narrowed in challenge.
“No.”
“Say it.”
“Never.”
“Tell me you want me.”
“I will never.”
“Denying it doesn’t make it not true, Sunshine. Naiamah didn’t lie about your lust, did she? You want me—”
“Will you stop it!” she cried, jerking out of his grip and sitting up. “What I want is irrelevant, and it would be much easier to forget this entire incident if you stopped pestering me ceaselessly about—”
A hand fisted in her hair and yanked her head back roughly. She had a split second to be aware of burning golden eyes before his lips crashed into hers.