Chapter 22
Chapter twenty-two
“Addy, ladybug. Why are you wearing disposable gloves?”
Addy fumbled with her spoon, eventually picking it up. “I don’t want my hands to get dirty.”
I eyed the soggy cereal she was attempting to shovel into her mouth, made almost impossible by the adult-sized gloves she was wearing. Most of the milk and cornflakes ended up on the table and floor, much to Orange’s delight. At least I wouldn’t have to clean it up.
After everything blew up yesterday, I’d spent the rest of the night panicking. I had now made up about 2,867 scenarios for what could happen. And none of them ended with me keeping the kids.
Thanks to my stress cleaning, the small apartment was now so spotless, we could eat off any surface. Maybe not the floor anymore since Orange had licked about half of it.
Elana was sitting on the couch, humming to herself while dressing her dolls.
Addy finished with her cereal and opened the pantry door.
Calling the cupboard we stored our food in a pantry was generous, the three shelves not providing much room.
But since I was broke, there was never a lot of food that we didn’t use up right away, so it worked for us.
“Are you still hungry?”
Addy nodded, and Elana stopped humming. “Addy didn’t eat while we were on vacation. And Daddy yelled at her.”
I stopped pulling out the bread and turned to face my eldest. It had been odd that she’d asked for seconds at dinner last night, since she didn’t usually eat much. But I’d figured she was just in a growing phase. “Why didn’t you eat, ladybug? Weren’t you hungry?”
Her bottom lip trembled, and then she burst into tears. I dropped the bread on the counter and kneeled down. She threw herself against me, and I closed my arms around her tightly. Once she calmed down, I leaned back so I could look at her. Her face was red, her cheeks wet. “What happened?”
Addy shook her head, but Elana had joined us and answered for her. “Tammy doesn’t like cooked food. Only fruit and vegetables.”
Oh shit. Addy didn’t eat anything crunchy. She couldn’t handle the sound. “But why didn’t she give you something else to eat?”
“She said we’re a family and all need to eat the same thing.”
A terrible thought shot into my head. “Addy, did you eat anything at all while you were away?”
“Jorge gave her muesli bars.”
“Who’s Jorge?”
Elana brushed her doll’s hair, leaning against me. “Our butler. But he said we can’t tell or he’ll get into trouble.”
Great. Now my kids were also encouraged to keep secrets. I guess we had to have the secrets talk. “Okay, girls. Now, I know that this was probably a good secret to keep, but there are some secrets that you shouldn’t keep at all. Do you know what they are?”
Both girls shook their heads, eyes big.
I shifted to a cross-legged position since my knees were killing me in a crouch.
Addy shifted onto my lap so she was sitting on one leg, and Elana moved to the other one.
“A good secret to keep is if you’re getting someone a present for their birthday and don’t want them to know because it’s a surprise.
It makes you feel good inside. Excited.” I paused, making sure they were still listening.
“And a bad secret is something that makes you feel bad inside. It’s the same feeling you get when you’re doing something that’s not allowed.
It could be when you take a chocolate bar after I told you no and then you don’t tell me and keep it a secret. ”
Elana stopped brushing her doll’s hair and looked at me. “I licked Orange. And Winston. I kept it a secret because I know I’m not allowed to do it.”
“Okay. Yup. That’s a secret you should probably share. And can we agree not to lick our pets anymore?”
Elana nodded and went back to brushing.
Addy had stopped crying, leaning the side of her head against my shoulder. “I didn’t flush the toilet last night even though I said I did.”
Well, that I knew about because I did it for her. “That’s not a good secret either. Thanks for telling me.”
I tipped her head up so she was looking at me. “It’s not okay to only eat muesli bars for a week. I’m going to have a chat with your dad about the food.”
Both girls spoke over each other, telling me I didn’t need to, and my alarm bells were ringing again. “And now I think you’re keeping another secret.”
I studied their faces, and my suspicion was confirmed when they couldn’t meet my eyes. “What else happened?”
When nobody spoke, I hugged them again. “You know you can tell me, right? I’ll always make sure to look out for you.”
Elana—as was to be expected—was the first to speak. “Tammy said we have to call her Mommy, and that she’s our mommy now and that we’re going to be living with her from now on.” Tears wet her cheeks. “But I don’t want to live with her. I want to live with you.”
“I want you to live with me as well.”
My voice broke on the last word.
Addy spoke into my sweater, her voice muffled. “Tammy said you don’t want us anymore and that you don’t give us the right food.”
That little troll. If she thought I would let this happen without fighting back, she had another think coming.
“Well, Tammy lied. And it’s not nice to lie. Because I never want you to live anywhere else but with me. I love you. You’re my girls.”
Since it was public knowledge now that I wasn’t Addy’s biological mom, I might as well get my gloves on and fight for my girls with everything I had. I did have the best divorce lawyer on my side, after all.
Once the girls had calmed down and there were no more tears, I couldn’t feel my butt anymore. I was also getting angrier. And I realized I needed Vance. And despite how he’d left yesterday, he had promised to help Malena should I ever need a lawyer again.
“How about some hot chocolate? And then you can watch some cartoons if you want.”
After getting the girls settled, I went into the bathroom and closed the door. Vance’s secretary picked up quickly. “Vance Moore’s office, Keith speaking.”
“Hey, Keith. It’s Mae Porter, calling for Vance.”
“Hi, Ms. Porter. Vance is in a meeting at the moment, but I’ll send him a message to call you as soon as he can.”
“Okay, thank you.”
We hung up, and I closed the toilet seat to sit down. What if he didn’t want to talk to me?
Peeling my still-numb butt off the toilet seat ten minutes later, I joined the girls on the couch.
I should call Malena and Keely. They’d know what to do.
But if Vance was as hurt as I thought he was over not knowing about Addy, I was scared to find out what Keely and Malena might think once they found out.
I was an idiot for never telling anyone.
I’d made it into a big secret when in reality it wasn’t.
The mess I was currently in was on me. I should have pushed Cockalorum harder on the adoption.
There were a lot of what-ifs and regrets to unpack.
Not that it would get me anywhere, since what was done was done.
Cue the panic. Which meant I came up with a hypothetical plan to leave the country and live somewhere on a beach where nobody could find us. I would homeschool the girls. And we’d catch our own food.
I’d gotten to the part where I realized I’d have to look up how to build a hut when my phone rang, interrupting my research.
It was impossible to steady my erratic pulse, and when I saw it was Vance calling, a momentary panic gripped me. Half in anticipation, half in dread, I answered.
“Keith told me you tried to reach me. Why didn’t you call my cell?”
I gripped the phone tighter and went back to the bathroom. The truth was, I hadn’t been sure if such a familiarity would have been welcome. “I didn’t want to disturb you.”
“You are the one person who can disturb me any time. Next time, don’t call the office, call me directly. And if I can answer, I will. If I can’t, I’ll send you a message.”
“Okay.”
He sucked in air, and I braced for what came next. “Malena and I worked out a strategy. I can’t represent you, but I can still make sure she wins. But there is a chance this might not work, ipo.”
A small sob escaped before I pushed it back down. “I don’t know if I can survive without them.”
“I’ll do everything I can. The fact that you have full custody now and can prove he’s an absent father will help us a lot.”
“There’s something else.”
The ominous silence on the phone told me I’d better keep talking before he jumped to conclusions. “It’s not something I forgot to mention. I’ve only just found out.”
“Tell me.”
I recounted my conversation with Cockalorum and then Addy and Elana. Vance didn’t say a word. Not even when I stopped talking. “Vance? Are you still there?”
“I hate that you and the girls have to go through this.” His voice sounded pained, and I fought back the tears again. “But this might be what tips everything in our favor. Let me think about how to use this, and then I’ll have a chat with Malena.”
“Thank you. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
“You’d be fine. But I hope you never realize it, because I have no intention of letting you go.”
“But you left.”
The words tumbled out, and I wanted to take them back. My emotions were too raw and my filter was gone.
“You hurt me when you didn’t tell me about Addy. But I’m sorry I left the way I did. It won’t happen again. I promise.”
A man who apologizes? What is happening?
“When will you be back?”
“Tonight. I’ll bring dinner.”
Could it really be this easy?
I wouldn’t say I counted the minutes until Vance came over. Because that would be a lie since I counted the seconds. I took the girls to the supermarket and then the playground, but time still didn’t seem to move. It didn’t help that I had even more free time since I didn’t need to make dinner.