Chapter 38
Jamie
Ellie Monroe loves me.
She fucking loves me. She loves me despite everything I’ve done to make her hate me. She loves me even though I don’t deserve it.
I was shocked when she said it. At first, I didn’t think I heard her right. Surely, she couldn’t love me. Not me. Not the guy who broke her heart. But I did hear her correctly, and she did tell me she loved me. I wasn’t lying when I’d told her I’d never be without her again.
She’s coming with me back to Rhode Island, back home. She just doesn’t know it yet. But I don’t want to think about all that right now. Not when she’s lying underneath me, kissing me like she’s starving.
We probably shouldn’t be doing this here, but what’s life without living on the edge every once in a while?
I let out a groan as her tongue slides against mine.
I can feel the same desperation I feel in every movement.
My dick throbs in my jeans, begging for release.
Ellie’s hand moves from underneath me, finding my hard cock and rubbing me up and down.
Don’t cum in your pants, Jamie. Please don’t cum in your pants.
A jolt of pleasure rushes through my body, and I bite her lip, causing her to moan.
“Fuck, Ellie.”
“Is this okay? Do you like it?” she asks, her voice shaky.
“I like everything you do, Sweetheart,” I tell her truthfully. Of course I fucking like it.
Ellie moans again when I settle between her thighs, the hard evidence of my arousal pressing against her core. She arches up instinctively.
I kiss and nip down her neck, wishing more than anything that she wasn’t wearing several layers right now.
“I need you,” I mutter against her throat, kissing the rapid pulse point I find there. “Can I have you?”
She nods quickly, like she’s just as desperate to have me inside her as I am to be there. “Yes.”
I pull back to look at her face. Her cheeks are flushed, lips swollen from kissing, and her eyes shine bright with want in the dark arena. She’s the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.
“Are you sure? Cause I mean, we could—”
“Jamie." She grabs my face in her hands, her thumb moving slowly back and forth, and even though her hands are freezing cold, I’ve never felt warmer. “I’m sure.”
I lean down to kiss her as I work at her jeans. The button gives way, then the zipper. I slide my hand inside, groaning when I feel how wet she already is through her panties.
“You’re soaked,” I growl. “All this for me?”
“No, it’s for Freddie,” she teases before breaking out into a small fit of laughter.
My eyes narrow. “You think that’s funny, huh?” I ask before sliding her panties to the side and slipping my fingers into her. Her back arches off the ground and her laughter stops immediately.
“N-no,” she stutters and cries out as I add another finger. I pump in and out slowly, watching her eyes roll to the back of her head.
“That’s what I thought.”
“Oh God, Jamie. More, please,” Ellie begs, and I oblige, adding a third finger and curling them to find that spot inside her. Her walls clench around me, hot and tight.
“Jamie," she whimpers. “I need you inside me.”
I've never heard a sweeter sound in my life.
“Okay, Sweetheart.”
I pull my fingers free and make quick work of my belt and zipper. My cock springs free, hard and aching, the tip already slick with precum. Ellie's eyes drop to it as she licks her lips.
I pull her jeans and panties down her thighs, not bothering to get them fully off. She spreads her legs as wide as the bunched fabric will allow, and I position myself at her entrance.
“Look at me,” I demand. Her green eyes meet mine. “I love you.”
I push inside her and we both groan at the sensation.
She’s so fucking tight and wet. I bury myself to the hilt, then still, letting us both adjust. The feeling is overwhelming, her walls fluttering around me, her fingernails digging into my shoulders.
Fuck, I could cum right now. But I won’t because I want Ellie to feel how much I care about her.
I want her to know how much she means to me.
She squirms a bit before she says, “Move. Please, move.”
Pulling back until just my tip remains inside her, I watch her as I slam forward. She cries out, her back arching off the concrete, and I rush to cover her mouth with my hand.
“Shhh, Sweetheart. You can’t be too loud. We’re not at home, remember?”
She nods. Keeping my hand over her mouth, I do it again. And again. Ellie’s head falls back and her eyes screw shut. I feel her moaning underneath my hand, and it drives me to go faster, harder.
“That's it, baby,” I grunt, driving into her. “Take it, Sweetheart. Take my cock like a good fucking girl.”
I remove my hand and lean down to kiss her, her lips soft and warm and wet. Her nails rake down my back, surely leaving marks through my shirt.
Hooking one of her legs over my shoulder, I change the angle, and she screams. Well fuck. My hand flies back to her mouth.
“Quiet,” I hiss, though I don't slow my thrusts. “Unless you want someone to find us with my cock buried inside you.”
Her eyes widen, and I feel her clench around me. The idea turns her on and I can’t help my smile. My dirty girl.
“Well, well, well. Ellie Monroe, do you like the thought of that?" I whisper, leaning close to her ear. “The thought of someone walking in? Seeing you spread open for me? Seeing how good I fuck you?”
She whimpers against my hand, her hips bucking to meet each of my thrusts. Jesus Christ, she feels so good.
“There you go, baby,” I coax, moving my hand from her mouth to grip her hip. “Cum for me, Ellie. Cum on my cock.”
“I'm…I'm… oh fuck, yes. Jamie,” she cries before her whole body seizes, her back bowing off the ground as her orgasm crashes through her. I fuck her through it, prolonging every wave, and watching her face contort in pleasure. She’s stunning like this. Completely undone and completely mine.
When the waves finally come to a stop, I flip her onto her stomach before pulling her hips up and driving back inside. She moans into the concrete as I take her from behind. I’m not exactly gentle, but she lets me keep going.
I grip her hips hard enough to bruise as I pump into her, chasing my own release. The sounds of our ragged breathing and Ellie’s tiny moans are the only thing that can be heard in the arena.
“Jamie,” she whimpers. “I'm going to cum again.”
“Then do it,” I demand, reaching around and finding her clit.
I rub tight circles over and over again, and then she shatters, her second orgasm seeming even more intense than the first. Her walls clamp down on my cock again, and that’s all it takes to send me over the edge.
Buring myself deep inside her, I cum with a groan, spilling inside her in hot pulses.
My vision goes white at the edges and my whole body shakes with the force of my release.
I collapse next to her, completely boneless. Holy fucking shit. That was intense.
For a long moment, we just lay there, tangled together on the cold concrete of the arena floor. My heart hammers against my ribs, and I can feel Ellie's pulse racing where our bodies remain connected.
“Wow,” she finally breathes “That was...”
“Yeah…” I say, pressing a kiss to her shoulder. “Wow.”
After we fix ourselves and pull our clothes back on, we lie back down, both on our sides so we’re face to face. Ellie smiles, but it doesn’t reach her eyes. The look makes my chest ache.
I reach for her, caressing her cheek. She leans into my touch, her soft skin feeling warm against my palm.
“I guess your knee really is almost healed,” she says with a chuckle. I nod, just now realizing that I did all that and my knee didn’t bother me at all.
“Yeah, I guess so.” Ellie looks away quickly, and I think I understand what she meant by that comment.
“Hey,” I say softly. Her eyes meet mine and I smile. “I love you.”
Her small smile widens just a bit. “I love you.”
“Come with me,” I blurt out. Ellie gives me a questioning look.
“What do you mean? Come with you where?” she asks curiously.
“When I go back, I want you to come with me.”
Her breath catches, and she seems to be at a loss for words. I don’t think she was expecting me to say that. I don’t think I can go back if she doesn’t come with me. I’m in too deep.
“Jamie, I—” she starts, but I interrupt because I have a feeling she was about to tell me all the reasons she can’t.
“Ellie, I told you I wasn’t going to leave you. I need you to come with me. I have a place in the city. We can live there and I’ll commute to the arena. You’ll be able to go back to acting, and you’ll be back with your friends. You’ll be with me, and I’ll be with you. It’s a win-win.”
“Jamie, that’s insane. I can’t just move in with you,” she tells me, standing from our position on the ground. I follow, towering over her.
“Why not? We already live together. We’ve been living together for the past four months. What’s the difference?” I ask.
Her arms cross over her chest. “It’s not the same. Living with you, being with you, it’s… we’re…” she trails off, seeming to have no other argument.
“Please. Just come. After the semester’s over, we’ll pack up and go to New York. You can stay at my place, which would be our place, while I go to training,” I explain, hoping she’ll see how good of an arrangement this could be.
Her weight shifts from one foot to the other.
“What if I wanted to stay here? As the director?” she asks. I hadn’t thought about that.
My brow furrows. “Is that what you want?”
Her hands fall to her sides, and she begins to pace back and forth in the small space.
“I don’t know, Jamie. It could be,” she proclaims. I move in front of her, stopping her pacing. Grabbing her arms and squeezing gently, I take a deep breath.
“Then I’d stay, too,” I tell her, and I really mean it.
Fuck it. Fuck hockey, fuck the pro’s, fuck it all.
It means nothing if Ellie’s not by my side.
I was too stupid to realize it when I was younger, too self-absorbed.
I should have never just left her like that.
I should have asked her to come with me.
“I can’t go back in time, Ellie. I can’t change the past. But I can change the future.
I should have asked you to come with me years ago and I didn’t.
So, I’m asking you now. And if you decide that you want to stay here and direct, then I’ll stay too. ”
She blinks, her shoulders moving up and down quickly with her breathing. She honestly looks like she’s seen a damn ghost.
“You’d just give up everything you’ve worked for?
The life you’ve been talking about getting back to since you got here?
To stay with me?” she asks in disbelief.
I know, it’s crazy, and it doesn’t sound like me at all.
I worked my ass off to get to the NHL, I trained for hours on end, I left my life behind.
I don’t regret any of it. The only thing I do regret, is not having Ellie by my side through it all.
“I think I’d do just about anything for you, Sweetheart,” I tell her.
I lean down and kiss her gently and everything fades away. The arena, the thoughts in my head, the doubt and the fear. And for the first time in months, I finally feel completely free. I finally feel like my life is falling into place, and there isn’t a piece missing.