51. Chelsi
CHAPTER FIFTY-ONE
chelsi
Reeling from Alex’s confession, I’m shellshocked on the couch as I attempt to weed through everything he shared.
There’s no doubt in my mind that he’s telling the truth.
Putting his own happiness aside for someone else is the most Alex thing to do.
He’d gladly give someone the shirt off his back without thinking.
He might seem hard and harsh to the outside world, but the reality is he’s a goddamn teddy bear. The most kind, caring man I’ve met.
That’s what makes all of this so much more complicated.
Maybe that’s why I feel numb. My brain is unable to compute how I felt immense pain one minute, followed by enduring love, so it decided to give up, causing me to feel nothing. It might be for the best. I don’t trust myself right now. Not where Alex is involved.
I’m torn between never wanting to speak to him again and banning him from my life.
Hell, from the life he has built in Nashville.
Wanting Jake and Anna to enact whatever revenge they can come up with.
And the other part: that’s where my heart comes in, urging me to forgive him.
To understand that, while he might have hidden something from me, it wasn’t malicious.
He’s still the amazing guy I fell in love with. The one I want to spend my life with.
I groan, slouching on the couch as I stare at the ceiling and contemplate how I can afford to go on a long Caribbean vacation to avoid all this drama. Desperate to stick my head in the sand. But my savings and measly internship salary put a huge damper on that idea.
What am I going to do?
My phone vibrates against my leg. I dig around in the blankets to find it and see a text from an unknown number.
Claire
Hi. This is Claire. I made Alex give me your number. I’m sorry for any issues I caused the two of you. All I want is for him to be happy, and you make him happier than he’s ever been. LMK if you want to talk. I’ll answer any questions you have.
I stare at the phone for a few minutes, unsure of what to do in this scenario. Although it would be helpful to hear her side of the story, it’s clear she’s on Team Alex and would likely convince me to give him a second chance. Maybe I should—
“Is it okay if we come back in?” Kate lurks in the hallway at the back of the living room.
“Yeah. He’s gone.”
Kate and Jake come into the room and take a seat on the other couch. There’s a bit of hesitation in their movement, almost like I’m a cornered animal that could strike at any moment.
“So, how are you feeling?” Kate asks, snuggling under Jake’s arm.
What does she expect me to say? My life was blown to smithereens, and I don’t know how to even begin to put the pieces together.
I shrug. “It’s a lot to process.”
“Jake told me everything. I’m still furious at Alex for not being honest with you, but I also can’t blame him for the choices he made to help a friend.”
I blow out a breath, extending my legs until they’re stretched out on the couch. “Same. It would be easier to hate him if he weren’t such a good guy. If I didn’t love him so freaking much.”
My phone vibrates again. I glance down to see another message from Claire.
Claire
I get it if you don’t want to talk to me…like ever. I probably deserve that.
Hate me if you want, but don’t take it out on him.
He really does love you.
“What am I going to do?” I mutter, tossing the phone on my lap.
Kate tucks a stray piece of hair behind her ear. “I’m assuming that’s Alex who keeps texting you?”
I shake my head. “It’s Claire. Sounds like she demanded my number from Alex. She’s offered to talk to me.”
“Huh. That could be interesting.” Kate taps her finger against her lips. “You should give her a call. Find out her side of the story. You might learn something that helps you figure out what to do.”
I sigh, knowing deep down that Kate’s right, but it doesn’t lessen any of the apprehension I have about talking to Claire.
“You should definitely have me in the room for support,” Kate suggests with a small smile.
“And a guy’s perspective is always helpful in these situations,” Jake adds.
“Fine. I’ll call her. You can both stay, as long as you’re quiet.”
Jake and Kate zip their lips and throw away the key as I pick up the phone. Taking a deep breath, I press call and put it on speakerphone.
“I’m really glad you called, Chelsi. I owe you a huge apology for this whole situation. Sometimes, my big mouth causes all kinds of problems,” Claire says quickly without taking a breath.
“I appreciate the offer. None of this is your fault. Alex should’ve told me about you.”
Claire chuckles softly. “That’s the understatement of the year.” She pauses briefly. “Has he told you about why we’re married? How it’s purely for legal reasons and nothing else?”
“He did. Explained it was a way to help you start your life as an adult while he was in the military, then you were diagnosed with MS.”
“I hate MS. It’s the bane of my existence. If it weren’t for this goddamn disease, we would’ve divorced a long time ago. I’ve tried to get him to end our arrangement multiple times over the years, but he refuses.”
“He told me that.”
“When he told me about you, I think it was more than a year ago. He casually mentioned meeting this woman at a concert and how she was the best friend of his boss’s girlfriend.
It was the first time he’s ever been interested in anyone.
I tried to press him for more details, but he wouldn’t say much.
It wasn’t until a few months ago that he brought you up again.
Shared how you’d moved to town. How he couldn’t seem to stay away from you.
I encouraged him to pursue you. To open his heart to you.
He’s been so closed off from love for his entire life. Unwilling to let anyone in. Until you.”
My heart skips a beat as my mind flashes back to my earliest interactions with Alex. The lingering glances. The way my body would flush when he was near. The indescribable pull I felt toward him. One that I couldn’t explain.
“I knew you were someone special and started bringing up the topic of getting divorced. But he’s stubborn and wouldn’t hear of it.
Convinced he has to be a goddamn martyr for another year.
I guess he got tired of having the same conversation over and over again, so he stopped speaking to me.
When you answered his phone earlier, I did the one thing I knew would make him take me seriously—I told you. ”
“I definitely didn’t see that one coming. I thought you were the restaurant calling about our online order. Never thought I’d hear my boyfriend has a wife.”
“He really doesn’t, though, Chelsi. Not in any way that counts. He never has.”
“Can you honestly say that’s true? That you’ve never seen him as more than a friend after you got married? Never wished it was more with him?”
Claire laughs hysterically. “Oh my God. Me and Alex.” She continues to chuckle, struggling to catch her breath. “Can you even imagine? I could never… That would be… Oh my God, that would be so gross.”
“Excuse me?” I cross my arms over my chest as I stare at the phone on my lap.
“I’m not into dicks, Chelsi. Haven’t been for almost twenty years. Big fan of pussy over here. So, you have absolutely nothing to worry about when it comes to Alex and me.”
“Oh…he didn’t mention that.”
“Doesn’t surprise me. He doesn’t believe it’s his place to share anyone else’s truth.
” She sighs loudly. “I don’t want my need for good insurance to come between the love you two have for each other.
I definitely shouldn’t have blurted out on the phone to you that I was his wife.
I’ve never referred to myself in that manner since we got married. ”
“Maybe there was a better way for you to handle it, but it doesn’t change the fact Alex should’ve told me about all of it.”
“Can’t disagree with you there. But for what it’s worth…
I think you should give him another chance.
You may not know me, but I know Alex. That man is madly in love with you.
If he was willing to stay in the military to ensure a high school friend could have lifelong insurance, then imagine what he would do for the woman who stole his heart. The one he tells me is his soulmate.”
Tears fill my eyes, and I blink rapidly to hold them off, not wanting to lose it on the phone with someone I barely know.
“I appreciate everything you’ve said, Claire. You’ve given me a lot to think about.”
“I’m always here if you have any other questions, or if you want to hear any embarrassing stories about Alex from when he was younger.
Most importantly, I hope you and Alex find your way back to each other.
True love doesn’t happen to everyone. You should hold onto it fiercely and fight for it with everything you have. ”
“Goodbye, Claire,” I reply, ending the call.
“Well, that was unexpected,” Kate blurts out. “Is it wrong that I actually like her?”
I chuckle softly as tears stream down my face. “No. She does seem very nice. The exact opposite of what I imagined after I talked to her the first time.”
“Any idea what you’re going to do?” Kate asks, sitting next to Jake.
Shaking my head, I look at the ceiling like I’ll find the answers to one of the most difficult questions written on it.
Jake clears his throat and focuses on me.
“I might be overstepping, but I’m going to say it anyway.
I’ve known Alex for more than a decade, and he’s the best man I’ve ever known.
Hands down.” He glances at Kate briefly before meeting my gaze again.
“Don’t push him away. Give him another chance.
He won’t disappoint you. I know it’s a lot to ask, given everything that’s happened, but I believe you and Alex have the same type of love Kate and I do—one that can stand the test of time.
Don’t let that slip through your fingers. ”
“What do you think, Kate?” I ask tearfully.
Her face softens. “Alex looks at you the way Jake looks at me, and vice versa. He screwed up big time. I’m not saying he should get a pass because he should have to grovel at your feet, but I do think you should give him another chance. Assuming that’s what you want.”
Squeezing my eyes shut, I try to make sense of the thoughts floating through my mind, but it’s like wading through thick mud. Every step requires all my energy and barely moves me forward.
Opening my eyes, I inhale deeply then exhale. “Do you mind if I stay here tonight?”
“Of course not,” Kate replies softly.
“This will always be your home,” Jake adds. “You’re welcome to stay here or live with us whenever you want. Our door is always open to you, Chelsi.”