Chapter Nineteen
Josie had been telling stories to Cash for almost two hours as she cooked and baked in the kitchen.
It seemed as though she couldn’t believe this day had finally come.
“It feels like it was just yesterday…” She trailed off thoughtfully.
“Then again, it feels like a lifetime. We’ve been running for a while… ”
Today was Samuel’s first birthday.
Cash watched as the little boy played on the floor next to the kitchen table with a couple of wooden figures Luke had made him. The morning sun shone through the window, stretching long golden rays across the floor. It was a nice day out.
And it was supposed to be a happy day. The cut fences, the threats from Remington, the way Josie had hurt herself trying to run off in the dead of night—it all still weighed on him. But he knew that today had to be about something else.
Today was about something else.
He could see Luke and Hank outside setting up a few tables, and Beau over by the corral struggling to put up paper fans he had made. Decorations. That’s what he had called them.
Cash felt pressure on the toe of his sock and looked down to see Samuel, gripping hold of and pulling himself to stand.
“Hey, little man!” Cash exclaimed, a smile crossing his face. “Look how strong you’re getting!”
Samuel grinned wide and softly giggled. He been doing his best to walk for a few weeks now, and Cash felt something twinge in his chest every single time he saw it.
“Ready to eat?” Josie called out in a sing-song voice. Samuel giggled again.
Cash nodded to her. “I’ll be outside,” he said.
He walked out of the kitchen, went outside onto the porch, and pulled on his boots.
Then he sauntered around to the side of the house, taking a few moments to look around and appreciate the hard work everyone had done.
It wasn’t much. But it was something. And that was what counted.
“Didn’t take you for the party-throwin’ type,” Beau called out, glancing over his shoulder as Cash shuffled toward him.
Shaking his head, Cash rolled his eyes and came over to the corral fence to help. “It ain’t a party. Just a little somethin’ so everyone can breathe for a minute and have a good time.”
Beau smirked. “Uh-huh. And it just so happens to be the kid’s birthday?”
Cash didn’t answer. He just scowled as he grabbed the other end of the decorations and started tying them off. “Figured I’d come out here and help you with this. You look like you can’t tie a knot in anythin’ smaller than a lead rope.”
“You’re gettin’ soft,” Beau teased. “That’s why you’re out here. You want to help.”
“Shut up.”
“Warmin’ up to this husband-and-father idea, huh?”
Cash nearly dropped the rope. Beau merely laughed and clapped him on the back. “I made those decorations for a birthday party,” he said as he turned to walk away. “So just admit that we’re having the boy a party.”
Cash stood there for a second, staring at the half-tied knot in his hands.
Father.
The word stuck in his chest like a burr.
He hadn’t planned on being anything more than some help to Josie and the baby.
Not really. This was just the right thing to do, wasn’t it?
This was a way to keep her safe, and to keep the town from talking about the Montgomery boys shacking up with some woman.
So why was it that every time Josie looked at him with those big green grateful eyes, he forgot anything else existed? Why was it that every time Samuel reached for him, he felt like he had some kind of purpose in life?
***
By mid-morning, the tables were set, the food was out, and for the first time in days, the ranch felt alive again.
Everyone had been pulling their weight and making things happen.
People had even come in from town. Mr. and Mrs. Green, the general store owners.
A couple of nearby ranchers. Clara Whitmore.
Sheriff Carter, too. It was a small get-together, but a get-together nonetheless.
Luke had gotten his hands on a few fresh pies from the baker in town, and Clara had arrived early with a small cake just for Samuel, one she had decorated herself.
Cash watched from a few steps away as Josie twirled Samuel in her arms, making him giggle. She was laughing, too. Not a forced or burdened laugh. It wasn’t half-hearted or weighed down with worry. It was real. Loud and free.
And if it didn’t knock the breath right out of him…
“Good work, big brother,” Luke whispered, nudging Cash’s side as he walked past. “That woman looks happier than I’ve seen her since she got here.”
Cash didn’t say anything back. He just kept looking—watching her. The way her auburn hair caught in the sunlight, how her freckles were perfectly scattered across her cheeks, how her nose twitched a bit when she smiled—how she looked like Samuel.
Have I… ever seen her before? Like this?
He didn’t think he ever had. She was an attractive woman, of course… but had he realized that she was this beautiful all this time?
***
“Watch him!” Luke laughed, nudging Cash in the ribs. Samuel was eating his cake from Clara.
They’d been dancing and playing horseshoes, and Samuel had been beaming the entire time, but it was nothing compared to the way he’d lit up when that cake came out.
His hands and arms were covered now as he smeared it all over his face and chest. He giggled as everyone laughed and looked on. He was a very happy boy.
“You probably shouldn’t have spent so long making that,” Cash chuckled to Clara, who stood next to the baby, her mouth fully agape as she looked down at him.
Then she giggled. “I guess not.”
“Let’s get you cleaned up,” Josie laughed, grabbing Samuel up from his seat as he licked icing off his sticky hands.
Cash shook his head, completely amused, and turned to reply to Luke, but Luke wasn’t there.
Confused, Cash glanced around, frowning. Then he caught sight of Luke… over by the barn, muttering to himself and kicking a rock.
That was nothing like Luke. Cash’s brows twisted, and he walked quietly over. As he got closer, he noticed that Luke seemed to be glancing over at the gathering, as though he was looking for something—or someone.
Cash looked over his shoulder, trying to pinpoint who it was.
“Luke, come get some cake!” Clara called with a laugh—and Luke seemed to jump out of his boots.
That was when Cash saw it.
Clara. Luke had been staring at Clara. With a whole lot more interest than he’d shown anyone else.
“Somethin’ you wanna say?” Cash murmured as he reached Luke’s side.
Luke seemed to snap out of it, glancing sideways at him. “What?”
“You’ve been watchin’ Clara,” Cash replied, crossing his arms. “Somethin’ on your mind?”
“Ain’t nothin’,” Luke scoffed. But he wouldn’t meet Cash’s eye, and his face was distinctly redder now.
Cash raised an eyebrow. “Sure about that?”
Luke shifted, glancing back at Clara, then clearing his throat. “She’s just… easy to talk to, that’s all. And I enjoy spending time with her.”
Cash smirked. “Right. Easy to talk to.”
“Shut up.”
“You sweet on her?”
Luke grumbled and shifted his feet awkwardly as he ran a hand through his hair. “I don’t know, alright? Maybe. She’s different from the other girls I’ve met. She’s nice. She’s not conceited at all.”
Cash watched, stifling a grin, as his little brother spoke with all the stiffness of a gangly young boy. It was nice, being able to tease Luke back for once.
But didn’t push. He just nodded and patted Luke on the shoulder. “Well, I guess we’ll see what happens, won’t we?”
Luke muttered something under his breath and turned to walk off, and Cash looked back to Josie. She was standing by the corral now, Samuel resting against her shoulder. He seemed content. Drowsy, but content.
She smiled at him across the yard and called out, “What’s with the grin?”
“What?” Cash faltered where he stood. He hadn’t even realized he was grinning. His cheeks were sore. “Uh… nothin’,” he managed.
But that wasn’t true. There was something about the sight of her standing there, both of them looking happy, that got to him.
What am I supposed to do with that? Better yet, how could he possibly explain that to her… or anyone else?
“You got feelings for her?” Luke jabbed over his shoulder, a little louder than what Cash liked.
He felt a lot of eyes turn to him. Embarrassed, he spun on his heel, fists balling, and growled at his brother. “Can it!”
Luke smirked and walked back to the happy group.
Cash grimaced and glanced away, hoping his face wasn’t as red as it felt. He glanced up at the sky, trying to regain control of his reaction. The sun was starting to dip below the horizon on the plains.
He took a deep breath, suddenly tired, and trekked back across the yard to sit down at one of the tables. His back ached as he plopped down, rubbing a hand over his face with an exasperated sigh. It had been a long day. A good day, but a long one.
Beau’s words from earlier really tugged at him. Warmin’ up to the idea of bein’ a husband and father, huh?
Maybe he was. Maybe he had been for a while now and hadn’t even known it…
And that scared him more than anything else in the world.