16. Ashley #3
I close my eyes, even though I’m sure I look stupid standing outside the restaurant.
I was nervous seeing Laurel at our group run, but it was fine.
She came over to help me get dressed and even made a special playlist. I declined her offer to scope out the place while I’m on the date, not wanting to take up her whole Saturday.
Stevie:
Think positive. He might be a sexy lumberjack. He might have an eight-pack and a smoldering gaze. This could be the best night of your life.
Stevie:
Or if he’s a jerk, kick him in the balls.
I break into laughter, which sends the butterflies fluttering away.
Okay, I’m heading in. I’ll keep you girls posted.
I spot Jared when I enter; he told me he’d be wearing a red sweater so I can find him easily.
He waves, and I try not to look like I’m fully checking him out while I walk up to him.
I don’t know what his deal with pictures is—this man is definitely attractive in person.
He’s tall but not gangly, built but not like someone who never leaves the gym.
His face lights up when he smiles at me.
“Great to finally meet you,” I say, giving him a small hug.
“And to verify I do in fact have a face?” he jokes.
“I wasn’t sure whether you were a Nigerian prince or the man in the iron mask, but you seem normal enough.”
He laughs. “Guess I fooled you then.”
We order drinks and appetizers and fall into casual conversation.
“So, you’re from Waterloo?” he asks as I take some bruschetta.
“Yes, my family is still there. My parents are divorced, but they both stayed in the city along with my sister.”
“Are you all close?”
I’m not sure how to answer. I talk to my mom regularly, but who knows with Sam these days. I wouldn’t say we’re on the same wavelength, but that’s a bit heavy for someone I’ve never met before. “Yeah, for the most part. My sister got married last year. She’s only a few minutes from my mom’s place.”
“That’s nice. Mine are all here except our extended family back in Singapore. Well, I have cousins all over the world, but my parents and brother are in Toronto.”
We talk about our families some more, then move on to pop culture.
Jared is smart and funny but also a great listener.
He even likes Broadway musicals like I do.
The time flies by, and when our meals are done, I’m almost surprised that a few hours have passed.
I’m about to suggest that we grab coffees and walk around, but there’s a cold wind so it’s not ideal for an outdoor activity.
“Can I walk you home?” he asks. “I get it if you don’t want me to know where you live and all that. Internet dating is strange.”
Wow, a man who understands the need for safety and doesn’t make me feel weird about it. Very refreshing. He’s made me feel safe. And anyway, our building’s doorman is diligent with keeping out uninvited visitors if anything did go south. “Sure, no problem. I’m a few blocks from here.”
We stop under the awning out front. I’d invite him up for a nightcap, but he seems a bit shy still, and I don’t want to push it. Clint left me wary anyway. Still, we look at each other for a few seconds until he leans down, then we share a sweet, gentle kiss.
“Thanks for a great night,” Jared says with a smile. “I had a lot of fun.”
“Me too. Let’s do it again.” I squeeze his hand and push through the door into my building.
I try to look normal when my mind is going in million different directions, spinning out over the prospect of a second date with a cute guy, and attempting not to compare our chaste kiss with the press of Sebastian’s mouth on mine.
Miss Midtown Reel (with transcript)
Miss Midtown appears in wig, glasses, and a baseball jersey.
“Hi friends! Spring is officially here in Toronto, baseball season is starting, and I’m here to ask you about dating profiles.
“How much information is too much, and how much do you need to make a decision? Is the lack of a profile photo enough to make you swipe away, or do you like a mysterious match once in a while?
“As someone who’s been on a lot—A LOT—of dates recently, I’ve noticed there tends to be a sweet spot for me of maybe three photos on a profile.
Anyone with a dozen is maybe trying too hard, and expecting me to do a lot of swiping.
No photos, and I start to wonder if they’re secretly a teenager living at home or older than my father.
“Anyway, it made me think about how we expect other people to know the unwritten rules of these platforms: How much is too much to share, how much is too little, what comes across as trying too hard. Maybe it’s more important to take whatever details people are giving me and work with that.
“What do you think?”
Comments:
No photo is suspicious! Definitely will not swipe on that. At least let me know what I’m getting into.
I don’t care how many photos, as long as none are awkwardly cropped. We know that arm is your ex-girlfriend. If you can’t find a good photo without cropping out an ex, I’m immediately put off!
You people spend way too much time thinking about this. If you like the photos and bio, go for it. If it’s not enough info for you, swipe on by. Judging people because they have four pics instead of the optimal three is probably why you’re still single. Just saying.