Chapter Sixteen
Ω Blakely Ω
I shouldn’t have said that. I should’ve waited. This is not going to end well. I just made this entirely awkward.
“I shouldn’t have brought it up. It’s too soon. We just came back into each other's lives. I really shouldn’t have brought it up,” I tell him quickly.
I need to learn to keep my mouth shut. “No. It’s too late, butterfly. I want to hear what you have to say.” Bronx takes my hand and intertwines our fingers.
“I want to have a baby. I turn twenty-five this year, and my life isn’t where I thought I’d be right now,” I tell him.
I wanted to be married by now with a baby or two already. Don’t get me wrong, I’m proud of everything I’ve accomplished in my life so far, but my biggest dream in life is to be a mom.
“You’ve done a lot of good work so far.” Bronx rubs his thumb across my hand. “Just because you’re not married and have no children doesn’t make you behind in life.”
“I know that. I do. But you know I’ve always wanted to be a mom. I know there’s always adoption. But I want to be pregnant. I want to experience it. I want to be happy with my best friend as I watch him grow into being a dad. I want the whole picket fence dream.”
Bronx looks like he’s lost in thought.
I look outside and see that a thunderstorm has rolled in. I didn’t think it was supposed to rain today. My heart starts to race. He’s been silent for too long.
“We can forget that I said anything. I can leave.” I start to get up but he’s faster than me.
Before I know it, I’m pinned to the bed underneath him.
He places one leg in between mine and leans down to look at me.
“I didn’t say no. You didn’t let me process, butterfly…
” he whispers against my lips. “I want that. I want you. I want it all. The big ol’ house with kids running around.
I’ve wanted that with you for as long as I can remember.
I don’t want you moving on to someone else. ”
He really wants that with me? I open my mouth, but he shushes me.
“I’m not done yet, butterfly.” He presses his body against mine. “When we have kids together, I want it to be me and you for the rest of our lives. I don’t want someone else raising my child. I want to be their dad. I want it all with you. I’ve never been more sure about anything else.”
I feel warm. I feel butterflies in my stomach. I’ve always wanted to be with him, but I thought he was out of my league. His weight against my body keeps me in the moment.
“You want to marry me?” I manage to get out.
I never thought he’d ever want me. Bronx flashes his crooked grin.
“Of course I do, butterfly. But first, I want to date you. I want to show you why you’re the best thing to ever happen to me.
I want to prove to your dad that I can take care of you fully and have him not worry.
” He pauses for a second. “I know that he’s always going to worry, but I want to prove to him that he won’t have to worry as much.
I want to prove to you that you’re the woman of my dreams.”
I feel my eyes water. I don’t know how to put it into words that that’s what I’ve always wanted. He leans down and captures my lips in a kiss.
I melt into him, I reach up and wrap my arms around him. I moan into the kiss with every small shift of his body.
The kiss deepens. His tongue pushes through my lips and traces every part of my mouth like he’s wanting to memorize it. All I feel is him.
His scent. Something spicy with a woodsy undertone. I don’t know what it is, but I love it. It’s intoxicating. He’s intoxicating. Everything about him is.
Bronx is the one to pull back first, just enough to give us time to breathe. “I’ve wanted to do that for as long as I can remember…” He practically pants as he rests his forehead against mine.
I smile. “I wish you would’ve…”
“I thought you didn’t want me.”
I stare at him. He thought I didn’t want him? He thought I didn’t want him.
Bronx lets me push him over so I’m straddling him. “You thought I didn’t want you?”
He puts his hands on my hips. “I didn’t think I was good enough for you… I thought your dad put it in your head that you deserve better. Which you do. You deserve better. But I want to be better for you,” he explains.
My jaw drops as I just stare at him. “I thought that you would’ve found some cheerleader to be with instead of me…”
He was on pretty much all the sports teams in school. Everyone wanted him. Bronx knew how popular he was, and he used that to his advantage.
“The only cheerleader I want is my biggest fan.” He winks.
I laugh. “I will always be your biggest fan and your biggest supporter,” I promise him. I feel ridiculous for being so nervous earlier. Because look at us now. “It took you long enough for you to admit your feelings to me,” I tease him.
Bronx flips us back around. “You really like to tease me, don’t you?”
I grin. “Of course I do. It’s so easy.”
Bronx chuckles and lays down beside me. He dips his hand underneath my jeans and grabs a hold of my panties again. “Are you going to do that every time we sleep together?”
“Unless we’re naked, yes.”