Chapter 22
Rory
My heart hasn’t felt this light in a long time. The picnic that Wes took me on gave me an opportunity to explain my depression to someone in a way I haven’t been able to before. It was freeing, and I find myself wondering, not for the first time, if I seriously need to consider counseling again. I’ve thought about it before, but money’s been too tight. Let’s face it, I really do need it, but finances still won’t allow for it.
Moving my thoughts away from counseling and finances, I turn my attention to today. Kyle and I are spending some time together today and I’m looking forward to it. The guys are making an effort to allow everyone one-on-one time and I appreciate the gesture. It’s wonderful when the three of us are together, but being with one at a time gives us a chance to know each other better. After Wes and I talked yesterday, I gave him permission to share with Kyle what I told him. I’ll be surprised if Kyle doesn’t have his own questions. It feels unexpectedly good to share it, so I don’t mind at all.
Kyle picks me up at my apartment, coming all the way to the door like Wes did instead of texting me to come out. The chivalrous act is not lost on me, and I smile when I open the door to his handsome face. He smiles back and steps in close to my body. I wrap my arms around his neck without hesitation and bring his lips to mine.
He meets me greedily, and we devour each other in the doorway to my apartment. Our lips wrestle for control, but when our tongues start to dance, I melt into him, savoring the hard planes of his body that contrast with the softness of his mouth. Kyle’s hands wrap around me, one resting in the small of my back and the other holding the back of my head as he presses closer. I moan softly at the pleasure of feeling him against me and he breaks the kiss.
He greets me. “Hi.”
“Hey.”
“That was a nice welcome.”
“I was just going for a hug. You got us all hot and bothered,” I say with a joking smile.
“I’m gonna let you win this one just because you’re pretty.”
Laughing, I let go of his neck, and Kyle releases me in turn. I sling my purse over my shoulder and we step out, locking the door behind us. Kyle’s car is well kept, similar to Wes’ truck, but his car is newer and nicer. We settle in and he takes off to our destination.
“Have you ever been to the gardens?”
“A few times, Claire likes them, so sometimes we’ll go and wander around outside to see all the different plants and outdoor displays.”
“Man, I haven’t been in a long time. Maybe we should all come here with Claire sometime. She can show me and Wes her favorites.”
“She would love that,” I tell him, grinning.
After we park, Kyle takes my hand as we walk to the building. It’s comfortable and familiar. I feel more grounded and sure of how things are progressing when little things like that happen. Once we pay our way in, we wander around the inside for a bit.
The gardens have an indoor area with greenhouses set to specific temperatures and climates, and an outdoor space with varying displays of art and seasonal plants that are native to this climate. Sometimes there are special displays, but this time of year there’s nothing going on, so the crowds aren’t as crazy as they could be.
As we’re walking through the arid climate display, I see some movement out of the corner of my eye. I turn to look at the movement, but I can’t see anyone nearby. That’s odd. There are a few blind spots in this area, but it’s pretty open for the most part. I take a step closer to Kyle on instinct.
“You okay?” he asks, keeping my hand tight in his.
“Just thought I saw something, but nobody’s there and it freaked me out.”
“I hate when that shit happens. Makes me feel paranoid, or like there’s a ghost or something.”
“Wait, do you believe in ghosts?”
He shrugs. “I don’t not believe in ghosts, but I’ve never actually experienced that kind of thing. The thought freaks me out more than anything.”
“So, confession time. I friggin’ love ghost shows.” I hold my breath a little after saying that, not sure how he’ll react. People either laugh at me for that, or they’re just as obsessed with them.
He tips his head to the side and looks at me as we walk down the path. “I don’t know that I’ve ever watched one.”
My jaw drops in shock. “Well, I know what we’re doing next movie night. Ghost shows!”
“That’s not a movie night.”
“Semantics.”
He chuckles and this time, I’m sure I see someone walking through the doors on the other side of the room. My adrenaline kicks in when I realize this person looks a lot like Nathan.
Fuck, what is he doing here? He hates shit like this. Maybe it’s not him. Maybe I’m just being paranoid.
“ Let’s go check out another area,” I suggest, pulling Kyle with me toward the exit near us.
He follows along without complaint, and we find ourselves in the exact opposite type of climate. Super humid rainforest type climate. It’s not a hot one, thankfully, but they do have a warm tropical climate room here too. The flowers are gorgeous and in full bloom; we must have come at the right time of the year. All kinds of colors splash amongst the greenery and it’s hard to decide where I want to look.
Kyle is pointing out a bright purple bloom up high when I feel someone bump into me from behind. The momentum forces me to stumble forward a step before I’m able to catch myself. I’m kind of pissed now, but maybe it was an accident. I turn to see who it was and stop cold.
“Nathan.”
He takes a slow perusal of my body, starting at the top of my head, dragging his gaze down to my feet, then back up again. Kyle tenses beside me and his hand lands on the small of my back, a reassuring presence. A sneer appears on Nathan’s face.
“Who’s this, E?”
Kyle, somehow pulling manners from somewhere, holds his hand out. “Kyle, her boyfriend. You are?”
If we weren’t staring at the man who made my life a nightmare for a full year, I’d be swooning at the fact that Kyle essentially claimed me. He’s right, he and Wes have been my boyfriends for a couple weeks now in everything but name.
Let’s be honest, they were mine the first time we had sex.
“ Her actual boyfriend.” Nathan sneers, refusing to take Kyle’s hand.
Kyle glances down at me, looking a bit unsure, so I subtly shake my head ‘no’, hoping he picks up on the fact that Nathan is not my boyfriend. I get a small head nod in return, and I focus back on Nathan. The entire exchange takes less than three seconds, but he notices and I can see some red starting to creep up his neck.
“What are you doing here?” I ask, surprised at how strong my voice comes through.
“Just taking a nice, leisurely stroll through the gardens. Why do you ask?”
“You never go to the gardens.”
He clicks his tongue at me in disappointment. “Now, now, I just never wanted to subject you to the crowds. I’ve always enjoyed coming here. I stayed away for your benefit.”
“No, that’s not—”
He holds up a hand to stop me. “It’s okay. I didn’t mind doing what was best for you. I get it.”
Kyle takes a small step forward, putting himself slightly between me and Nathan. “Did you need something?”
“E here hasn’t texted me back. I was getting worried she forgot about me.” Nathan’s eyes don’t move from my face.
“Don’t call me that!” I snap back at him.
“You put up with this attitude?”
Kyle sneers. “It’s called being a person with preferences and opinions. Clearly you don’t understand how that works.”
“Better watch it, or she’ll start disrespecting the wrong person.”
“You should leave,” Kyle grinds out, his teeth clenched together.
Nathan smirks. “See you around.”
He walks off and I can feel the adrenaline leave my body and the shaking starts. What the hell was that about? My mind starts to whirl with worry on how to explain this to Kyle. He’s not dumb; he’ll be able to tell there’s history between us. I don’t want to think about it, and I don’t want to drag Kyle or Wes into things. Nathan stalking me at my job is one thing, but running into him at a place I know he hates is different.
Kyle turns and puts his hands on my shoulders, peering at me before he pulls me in close and wraps me up in his arms. Mine instinctively move to hold him close and we stand there while my shaking subsides. He places a small, sweet kiss on the top of my head, and after a few minutes, we break apart.
“I’m so sorry,” I blurt out, and a tear starts down my face.
Kyle looks horrified. “Why? You have nothing to be sorry for!”
“I should have done something, something to get him to leave sooner. I messed up. You guys don’t need to deal with this shit and now it’s going to be a problem—”
“Stop. Take a breath,” Kyle interrupts me and helps me breathe in a slow pattern.
I didn’t realize I was breathing so fast, so I focus on him. We stand there, his hand holding mine on his chest as I feel his chest expand and contract with air. Once I’ve calmed, he nods at me, and I return it, before we make our way out of the garden area we’re in and head for the car. Once we’re buckled in, he turns to me and holds his hand out for mine. I take it and we lace our fingers together.
“I would like to talk about this, and I’d like Wes to be there. I understand if you don’t want to right away, but I know we have both seen him at the bar every time we go. Neither of us realized you know him, but I’m concerned about you, and I think Wes will be too.”
I take a deep breath, my cheeks puff up as I breathe out. My hand squeezes his, my heart constricting. I’m terrified to share this with my guys. As much as I believe they won’t respond badly, it’s hard to really say how someone will react until the moment happens.
“Yeah. I know. Can it wait? I don’t think I can right now.”
He nods, leans over and gives me a kiss, then maneuvers the car out of the parking lot. There’s no way I can put this conversation off for long, but I don’t think my heart can take explaining the past to Kyle and Wes right after seeing the man of my nightmares.
Chapter 23
Rory
Today has turned out to be quiet so far. I woke up in a decent mood. It’s a nice day outside, and I’m looking forward to time with both of my guys later. I’ve only been up for a bit, but my body isn’t feeling weighed down, and I’m feeling capable, so it’s a good sign for the day today. As I take the last few sips of coffee, my phone starts to ring on the couch next to me. Looking down at it, I see my mom calling. I answer the call with an internal eyeroll.
“Hi Mom.”
“Rory. I need you to take Claire today.”
“I’m doing fine. How are you?”
“Your sass isn’t appreciated. Come get your niece.”
“You know, I have no problems taking her, Mom, but you could fucking ask once in a while.”
“I’ll see you soon.”
She hangs up, and I toss my head back on the couch. Truly, I have zero problems taking Claire today, even though I have plans with the guys. They love her, I love her, and we have a good time all together. However, I do have a problem with my mom being an absolute asshole to me. I don’t understand what her problem is. However, I never say “no” to a Claire day, so I rinse out my mug, set it in the sink, then dress and head out the door. My car isn’t anything fancy, but it does have Bluetooth, so I feel safe enough making phone calls since I don’t have to hold anything. Dialing Wes, I make my way to the road as the call rings.
“Hey there.” His deep voice floats over the speakers, making me smile.
“Hey yourself, how are you today?”
“Good. Kyle and I are looking forward to having you over. What time are you thinking?”
“Well, I have a slight change in plans, and I hope you don’t mind.” I bite my lip, my nerves getting the better of me.
“Oh, sure, what’s up? I’m gonna put you on speaker.”
He doesn’t wait for my response before I hear Kyle’s voice. “Hey sweetheart, what’s goin’ on?”
“Well, my mom called as I was finishing my coffee a few minutes ago and demanded I come get Claire. I know you guys got along with her just fine at the Farmer’s Market, but I wasn’t sure how you felt about spending the day with both of us? I understand if it’s too much.”
“I have zero problem having that girl around,” Wes says immediately.
“Yeah, bring her with you. We can figure something out if she doesn’t want to be cooped up all day,” Kyle adds.
I smile in relief. Knowing they like her is one thing, but when they prove it, it makes my heart swell. “Thanks guys, I know she’ll be excited to hang out today.”
We end the call and a few minutes later, I find myself at my mom’s house. As excited as I am to see Claire, I’m equally annoyed to potentially deal with my mother. Claire is worth it, though, and I drag my ass out of the car to go get her. My mom is just as short-tempered in person as she was on the phone, so she all but shoves Claire at me before we leave with minimal fuss. Claire slams her car door and settles in with a huff.
“Well, that was some low-key drama. You doin’ okay, peanut?”
Claire levels me with a look. “Still on the nickname hunt?”
“It’s a worthy quest.” I shrug.
“Also, I’m fine. What’s the plan?”
“How do you feel about a day with Wes and Kyle?”
“Really? Awesome! Let’s go!”
“Why are you more excited about them than me?”
She taps her lip in thought. “Probably because they’re shiny and new.”
My head tips back in laughter as we start for the guys’ house. Hopefully we can cheer her up. It sounds like she is well aware of my mom’s desire to get her out of the house and I’m guessing that’s weighing on her mind. No kid wants to feel unwanted. Once we pull into the driveway, Claire all but jumps out of the car and races to the door. I follow her with a smile on my face, and she knocks rapidly on the door. Wes opens the door and pretends to peer around, looking for someone.
“Hey Rory! I heard someone knocking, but I can’t see anyone and you’re clearly too far away!”
“I’m down here!” Claire stomps her foot.
“Who said that?”
“Wes!”
“Wait, I’m Wes. Is there another Wes here?”
“No wonder Aunt Rory likes you,” she says, trying not to smile.
Wes finally looks down at her. “Oh hey there, nugget! How ya doin’?”
“Nugget? Really?”
“Worth a shot. Come in!”
Wes finally steps back from the doorway, and I follow Claire into the house. His hand reaches out and snags my waist. Wes brings his mouth to mine as he holds me in place by the doorway. My body immediately responds and I relax, leaning into him and chasing him for more. His mouth is perfect on me, and I want to feel his tongue dipping into my mouth, massaging mine and promising me of things to come.
“EW! Aunt Rory!”
“Sorry, love, can’t help it. He’s too cute!”
Claire makes a gagging noise and I laugh, walking fully into the room while Wes shuts the door. Claire makes herself at home on the couch, looking around at all the pillows and blankets.
“It looks like your couch, Aunt Rory!”
Kyle saunters into the room at that point. “It’s just proof that your aunt is perfect for us.”
“Hi Kyle!” she chirps.
“Hey there, glad you get to join us today.”
“Really?”
“Of course! You’re awesome. We want to get to know you more.”
He settles next to her on the couch, and I watch as she looks at him in amazement. I’m not sure my brother has showered her with much affection in years. The older she gets, the less he and his wife are around. It doesn’t make sense to me. I’ve tried to figure it out before and never found the answer.
“So what are we doing?” Claire asks.
“Well, I was thinking maybe a board game, but I doubt that’s the kind of thing you like,” Kyle says.
“I like board games!”
“What? Are you sure? You don’t seem like a kid who wants to have fun.”
I nod my head in agreement. “She definitely likes to be bored.”
“I do not! I want to play a game!”
“As long as you don’t start talking in Jigsaw’s voice,” Wes says under his breath.
I struggle not to laugh as Kyle leads Claire to their spare room. There’s some rustling around and discussion as they pick out a game. Wes and I head to the dining room and choose seats. Claire comes skipping into view holding a box in her arms like a treasure.
She holds it high over her head when she reaches the table and shouts, “CLUE!”
“All RIGHT!” Wes exclaims.
“You sound way too excited,” I say before laughing.
“Hey, this game is awesome. It never gets old.”
“Anyone want a drink?” Kyle asks.
We all do so as we get the game out, he runs to the kitchen to grab four glasses of water. Once the board it set up, we shuffle the cards and select the mystery one from each, sliding them into the secret envelope. Then the game begins. We play for a few rounds, Claire winning once, and Wes winning twice. I think they ended up in their own competition at one point, but there was plenty of laughter, so I didn’t worry about it. I just enjoyed watching them.
“Well, now that I’ve let you win, Wes, what’s for lunch?” Claire asks as she helps pack up the game.
“What? You let me win?”
“Obviously.”
Wes cracks up at Claire’s matter-of-fact tone and the rest of us join in, even Claire.
“How about we go find some food trucks? I think there’s some in the park,” Kyle suggests.
“Oh man, I love food trucks,” I chime in.
“Well? How’s it sound to you, little lady?”
Claire rolls her eyes. “I think I prefer peanut.”
“I meant about the food, sassy pants!”
“Sure, let’s see what all the fuss is about.”
Kyle chuckles and we all head for the door. Once we’re piled in Kyle’s car, he drives the five minutes to the nearby park that hosts food trucks regularly. We find a spot and walk over, Claire pestering Kyle and Wes about one thing or another, just to see what reactions she’ll get. My smile hasn’t left my face since we started playing Clue and my heart warms over how doting Kyle and Wes are to Claire. My hand is intertwined with Wes’ and once we reach the food trucks, we make a point to survey our options before choosing where we want our food from.
Wes and I get loaded up with food before finding an open picnic table, which surprises me. They’re usually all taken, but we managed to see one being vacated right as we wandered over to the seating area. None of us would have minded sitting on the grass, but this is definitely more convenient with drinks. Claire and Kyle join us after a minute and settle in on the opposite side of the table. We make a point to swap and share food as we go, laughing and chatting. I move to swipe something off Claire’s disposable food boat and notice she’s got her eyes fixed on something in the distance and her face is a little pale. I pull my hand back, feeling concerned.
“You okay, Claire?”
“He’s here,” she says quietly, flicking her eyes to me.
“Who, honey?”
“ Him .”
That’s all she has to say for me to know exactly who she sees, and I’m thrown back into a memory.
Claire and I are painting nails at my apartment today. Nathan doesn’t like it when I paint nails at his condo, so I brought her here. I don’t want to upset him, so this seemed like the best solution. We have plans later, so I definitely want to stay on his good side. Otherwise, he might cancel and he’ll be grumpy all night. Grumpy Nathan isn’t fun. We’ve finished our nails and while we wait for them to dry, Claire puts on a Disney movie. She’s starting to grow out of a lot of her kid interests since she’ll be ten soon, but nobody outgrows the classics. The door to my apartment slams open when we’re about ten minutes into the movie.
“What the fuck is this?” Nathan asks, aggressively.
“Oh. We’re painting nails and I know you don’t like the smell, so we came here.” I tell him quietly.
“Why is she here?”
I turn to look at Claire, who has made herself into a small ball on the couch next to me. “She couldn’t be home alone, so I brought her here. My mom will get her before our plans tonight, I promise.”
“That wasn’t the plan. She isn’t part of the plan, E. Why did you do this?”
“She’s my niece. I’m not going to leave her alone.”
He takes a couple of steps toward me, and I immediately sit up straighter. I don’t want him to make Claire feel bad; she’s just a kid still. He stops and his eyes wander from me to Claire, then back again. I stand and close the small distance between him and the couch. Nathan places a hand on my shoulder, slowly moving it up my neck until his hand threads into my hair. Then he makes a fist and pulls my head back with force.
He bends lower toward me, and his voice is low and aggressive. “You will not put her before me again, do you understand? This is completely unacceptable.”
“I understand. I’m sorry,” I whisper, hoping he doesn’t turn his temper to Claire.
“You know I don’t like children, and now you’ve put me in this awkward position where I look like the bad guy. Why did you do that?”
“It won’t happen again, I promise.”
“Better not. I’m a nice guy, people like me. Keep her out of sight and wait until I say it’s okay to see her.”
“Okay.”
He storms out and slams the door behind him. I allow myself to fall back into the couch where I was sitting before and look over at Claire. Her eyes are huge, and she has tears running down her face. I hold my arms out and she scrambles into them.
“He’s scary,” she whispers.
“I’m sorry, love. I’ll keep him away from you, okay?”
“Aunt Rory, I don’t like him.”
“I know, love. I know.”
I’m not entirely sure I like him lately, but he’s been so good to me. He gives me so much love and he doesn’t ask much in return. I should have checked in with him before getting Claire. I know that now. Next time I need to make sure I ask first. One thought that nags at my mind as I soothe Claire is: How did he even know where I was?
I nod at her and look over to Wes and Kyle as they observe the interaction between me and Claire.
“We need to go,” I tell them.
“Let’s do it,” Kyle says, standing and grabbing his drink.
“I’ll get the trash,” Wes offers.
My heart swells again, and I’m worried about being able to keep it in my body if they continue to be this wonderful. I hold out my hand for Claire, and she comes in close to me, tucking herself into my body and I wrap my arm around her.
“I promised I’d protect you and I will,” I tell her softly.
Glancing over at Kyle, I see him staring in the direction that Claire had been looking, an odd look on his face. I can’t tell if he’s confused, angry, or worried. Maybe it’s all of the above, but I can’t quite tell. Wes returns, sees Kyle’s face, and turns his own head to look in that direction. His is full of confusion, then anger. He glances between me and the view behind me before herding us all back to Kyle’s car. As we leave, I take a look over my shoulder and see Nathan standing there.
His hands are in his pockets, and he’s standing in the midst of the crowd, not moving, his eyes completely locked on us. His tattoos are on display in the short-sleeved T-shirt, and his face is set in anger. A look I remember well. Before I can turn my head back forward, I see him mouth “you’re mine” and I take a deep breath to try to keep the panic at bay.
The guys take us back to their place, but when I glance at the clock, I realize it’s time to take Claire home. I promise to return later and get Claire into the car so we can head out. As we go, Claire looks uncomfortable, so I take a minute to check in.
“You okay, sweetheart?” I ask.
“Um, I guess,” she mumbles.
“You sure? I’m not sure I believe you.”
She sighs. “He scares me.”
“I know, me too. I’m sorry you had to see him again. I didn’t want you to.”
“It’s okay, Aunt Rory. I know you didn’t invite him. Plus, you don’t love him anymore; you love Kyle and Wes.”
“Well, I mean, I wouldn’t say I love them yet.”
“You do, I can tell. They’re nicer than Nathan. And they’re funny.”
“They like you too. They told me they like having you around.”
“Good, I like them too. Let’s keep them.”
I laugh. “Good plan.”
We pull into the driveway, and I walk her up to the door. Once inside, I call out to let my mom know I’ve dropped Claire off. She comes around the corner a few moments later and raises an eyebrow at the two of us. I look at Claire and nod my head toward her bedroom; she nods in agreement and heads off.
“Don’t worry about feeding her. We went to the food trucks this afternoon with Kyle and Wes, so she’s good.”
“You took her out with two men?” My mom sounds horrified.
“Yeah, they’re the guys I’ve been seeing. I told you about them.”
“Well, I didn’t think you were serious!”
I frown at her. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
“You and Nathan should be together, obviously. I don’t know why you’re still resisting this.”
“Oh here we fucking go again.”
I turn to leave as she yells at me. “Don’t you walk away from me!”
I stop and turn, giving her the bitchiest look I can. “You are my mom, and Claire lives with you. Those are literally the only two reasons I still talk to you. Let me make something very fucking clear. I will never, NEVER go back to Nathan. He’s an abusive asshole that I entertained for way too long. He fooled me and he’s still fooling you.”
“Rory, these outbursts are quite unnecessary. That man was wonderful to you. He doted on you, gave you nice things, and let you stay at his condo, which is much nicer than your apartment. Stop accusing him of things he didn’t do.”
“Yeah, take his side. Again. Fuck your daughter, listen to the abuser.”
“You need to show me some respect.”
“No, I really don’t.”
I leave at that point, completely done with this conversation. She’s still sputtering at me as I leave the house, and my good mood is completely gone. Part of me wants to go home, but I know the guys were really looking forward to me coming back over. Indecision paralyzes me briefly as I sit behind the wheel of my car, still sitting in my mom’s driveway. My phone dings and I pull it out of my purse on reflex.
Whes! : Hey pretty girl, we know you’re probably exhausted, but we’d still love to see you. No pressure. We can just sit and cuddle.
Pool God : Like he said, no pressure, honey.
I smile and realize maybe being with someone is exactly what I need. I respond to let them know I’m on the way, and head to two men who want nothing more than to love me.