Chapter 74
CHASON HARLOW
The magic in Hex & Hearth gives me the courage to ask the most pressing question. I’ve made assumptions, but I need the full story, and it doesn’t hurt that lying in here is difficult and Elara, the owner and bartender on duty, senses lies before they’re spoken.
“Both options suck. But I guess it’s worse thinking I could harm my mate. I’ve had loss and can live through it. Imagining my mate dealing with my disappearance or death—” he shivers “—makes my skin crawl. I can’t choose that for my mate.”
Our connection surges with his fears. The bond with Rafe will change from my source of comfort to pain.
Rafe has to accept me as an equal partner before I can fight for us. His past trauma drives his decision and it’s not unfounded. I won’t ask him for anything he’s not willing to give.
Who knew I’d be the selfless witch.
I squeeze his hand in understanding. “You should stay with me tonight. It’s late and you’ve had an emotional day. I work tomorrow, so you can get an early start.” I’m too afraid to admit I’m not ready to let him go.
“You better be careful, or I’ll sneak into your bed again,” he teases.
“I’d very much welcome… your wolf.” I lock my feelings down, hiding that I’m on the verge of crying happy tears because we have another night.
The house is too still when we enter, and Nyx’s absence is strange. Rafe crowds me until I sit on the couch, and he climbs into my lap, rubbing on me as if he’s embedding his scent in me.
Maybe fate knows something about mates when she chooses. I’ve chosen so much worse in my past. Figures, even someone specifically picked for me isn’t willing to stay. Fate’s a fickle bitch.
I vacillate between anger and disappointment that he’s leaving before giving us a chance. Fate can kiss my assets and take a broom straight to the center of the earth if her ideal mate for me is a drive-by experience.
Fate’s leaving a hole Rafe created. It’s so unfair.
We hold each other in silence for hours. I must fall asleep because I’m under my covers when Rafe whispers, “I’m sorry.”
He’s curled around me in his naked human form, and as delicious as his body is, I keep my back to him. Sex will only complicate things, and he’s leaving when the sun comes up.
No long, lingering goodbye, which is probably why I’m listening to him breathe. It’s the last chance I’ll have to be close to him.
Sorrow creeps in and robs my sleep as the bleak night crawls by, and I’m almost relieved when Rafe’s phone rings.
He lets me go, taking my coziness with him. I shiver and tuck the blanket tighter around me.
“Wayne, slow down,” Rafe pauses to listen. “Okay, I’ll be there.” He rounds the bed and kneels in front of me. “My cousin went missing from patrol. I’ve got to go. Wayne’s booking the flight while I drive to the airport.” His fingers gently sift through my hair.
I nod. The lonely part of me wants to cling to him and beg him not to go. To give us a chance to know each other and choose each other instead of being forced together. But I promised myself not to lose it until he leaves.
When I open my mouth, I say, “You’re leaving your car at the airport?” As if that matters.
He kisses me and is gone.