Chapter Eighteen
The road noise was the only soundtrack to the drive that felt like it had lasted eons.
They had only been in Callum’s truck for five minutes.
Something was off. Grace had expected Callum to interrogate her after the meeting with Scarlett and Dean had turned into a working lunch, but he hadn’t said much.
“Scarlett dug up things that I bet Dominic thought were buried.”
“Yeah,” he mumbled. “Like what?”
“Questionable crypto promos. More like gambling for his investors than anything close to legit. She’s going to send that information to their contact at the FBI, maybe to butter up the feds and find out what the Attorney General’s office wants—Earth to Callum?”
“Hmm?”
“What’s the matter?” She studied his profile and had never seen him concentrate more on driving. The twenty-five-mile-per-hour speed limit and the stop signs every block didn’t warrant his level of attention. “You learned something while I was with Scarlett?”
“Not really.”
“Well, something’s wrong. You’ve been quiet and broody since we left.”
He lifted a shoulder, checked his mirrors. “Just thinking through our next moves. Do you care if we swing by my apartment? I could use clean clothes.”
Her curiosity piqued. “Sure. Of course.”
“Great,” he said in that same monotonous tone.
Had time in the office reminded him she was just his job?
“Could I use your laundry?” She’d been meaning to wash clothes before they had to leave Alicia’s.
He glanced over. “I didn’t plan to stay there that long, but there will be a washer and dryer where we’re going.”
His five o’clock shadow had thickened. She wanted to touch the scruff on his face. That was clearly not in the cards anytime soon. “Okay.”
“It’ll have everything you need.” At the stop sign, he turned off the main street. “We could literally bunk there for weeks without having to leave.”
Playing house with Callum sounded like fun, so long as the moody, broody man driving the truck transformed back into the man who made her stomach flip.
After a series of turns, they found themselves in front of a small two-story brick apartment building that couldn’t have held more than a dozen units. Air conditioners hung in the windows of the bland building. The flower planters were the only sign of personality.
“Home sweet home.” He shifted into park. “It’s nothing fancy and is barely furnished.”
“I can wait in the truck if you prefer.”
His eyebrow arched. “Why?”
“You don’t seem happy I’m around, to be honest.”
“I’m happy.” He opened the door. “Come on. Let’s go.”
“I don’t believe you,” she muttered under her breath, but joined him.
They crossed the parking lot together, and Callum took her hand. Alrighty then. Grumpy. Moody. But willing to hold hands. She could work with that and glanced up. He didn’t look down, but he squeezed her hand.
Butterflies stormed her stomach. The handhold made her float. She pinched her lips together to hide how over the moon his touch made her. She didn’t know what was bothering him, but his taking her hand said more in the last two seconds than he had since they’d left his office.
They reached the front of the boring brick building, and Callum released her hand after another squeeze. He unlocked the glass door and led her to the second-floor hallway that was broom-swept and spot-cleaned. Clean but bare, this place wasn’t where she imagined he would live.
His unit was at the back of the apartment building. A corner unit. The apartment door opened to… not much. Grace stifled her reaction as they walked into a space devoid of anything.
“Like I said, home sweet home.” Callum tossed his keys onto the counter. “Furniture came with the place, and I’ve never spent more than a couple of nights in a row here. I travel a lot, and whenever I’m off the clock…” His shoulders lifted. “…I ask for more work.”
She tapped her teeth. “It’s good to stay busy.”
He followed her gaze to the closed blinds on all the windows.
“If you open the blinds,” she suggested, “you’d get a little light in here. Maybe liven the place up.”
“I’ve never thought twice about the lighting. This is where I sleep and shower and store my clothes.”
“That’s a little sad, Cal.”
He dropped his duffel bag onto a pathetic couch. “When my housing becomes a priority, I’ll find a place I care about.”
Was that his time in the Army rubbing off on him? No, she didn’t think so. Callum and Hayden had always lived together and never given the impression that they lived in bare-bones apartments. Their housing assignments and rentals leaned more toward bachelor pads.
“Give me ten minutes to pack a bag, and we’ll hit the road again.”
She wanted to ask more about his empty apartment and his quiet mood in the truck, but thought of the way he held her hand in the parking lot instead. Grace stepped between him and his bedroom. “Wait.” Before she lost her courage, she pushed onto her tiptoes and pressed her lips to his.
He didn’t kiss her back.
Her heart sank. Callum didn’t move away. He searched her face as if he needed answers. She didn’t know the questions. After wanting him for so long, she refused to let whatever had happened break the connection heating up between them. She steeled herself for rejection and kissed him again.
Callum Hale didn’t kiss her back, and she thought she might die.
Until he did.
Whatever had fouled his mood and kept him at bay disappeared, and growling into the kiss, wrapped one hand around her waist and threaded his hand into her hair with the other, holding her to him as if he planned to devour her in the hall.
She knotted her arms around his neck, needing to be closer. His tongue delved past her lips, hot and needy and driving her wild—Callum pulled back, leaving her too exposed. Too raw. Too much in need of this man. “What?”
His chest heaved. An awful expression darkened his face. She saw regret and wanted to be sick.
Grace spun. She didn’t know where she’d run to, but she had to get out of his apartment.
“Wait.” His hands clamped on her shoulders.
“I’d rather not.” Pain cracked in her throat. “Let me go.”
His fingers squeezed into her flesh, and he held her at arm’s length, turning her to face him. “Give me a second.”
“For what?” Was this the same man from the morning? She heard the pleading in her voice. Embarrassment burned up her neck, but she had to know how he could hold her hand in the parking lot but now pry her off of him when they kissed. Tears welled in her eyes. “What did I do wrong?”
“Nothing.” He held her still when she tried to pull back. “This is complicated, Grace.”
“Since when?”
“Since I thought more about it and realized that maybe we needed to talk—”
“I have talked and talked and talked. So have you, I thought. What more is there to say? You either want me or you don’t. I don’t have it in me to play games.”
“I would never play games with you.” His jaw ticked. “It’s not that simple.”
“It is—” Screw it. She pulled her shirt over her head—and forgot she had those ugly bandages all over her arms and neck. Not exactly the sexy move she’d been aiming for. But her point was the same. “Do you want me? Yes or no?”
“You are proving my damn point.”
“That’s impossible. You haven’t explained a single thing.”
“Put your shirt on, Grace.”
She shimmied her shorts down her legs. “No.”
“What the fuck are you doing?”
“Trying to find the man who almost took me to my bedroom this morning. You were just holding my hand. You’re in there somewhere. You just kissed me like you wanted to. So I’m not grossing you out or something.”
“You,” he stepped back, “are in a position—”
“I’m halfway naked. I can see my position. You can too. I’m being as completely upfront as I can be. What’s going on?”
“You’re vulnerable.”
“Yeah, I am. I’ve stripped nearly naked in front of the guy I’ve wanted my entire life, and he’s rejecting me.”
His lips parted, but nothing came out.
Angry tears burned the back of her throat.
“I don’t know why you left the Army. I don’t know why you won’t kiss me.
I don’t know anything, and I’m in my bra and underwear, begging.
God.” She turned around, snatched her clothes off the floor.
“If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to redress in the bathroom and maybe search for my dignity before I drop dead of embarrassment. ”
His warm hands covered her stomach and folded her close to the solid muscles of his torso and thighs. She gave a half-hearted elbow to his gut. He held her still and close enough that she could feel his thickening erection. She wanted to scream and didn’t know what to do.
“Listen.” He dropped his lips against the back of her head. “I am going to fuck this up, and I can’t. It would kill me.”
“You’re doing that right now. I’m throwing myself at you, and you’re saying no.”
He turned her in his arms. “I don’t want to exploit whatever—”
“Exploit me, Callum. Take advantage of me. Take my mind off everything that has happened. For God’s sake, make me forget the world.”
“I want to.” Frustration ticked in his jaw. “But we shouldn’t. I can’t.”
“I don’t believe you. You said we were honest, and I don’t believe a word coming out of your mouth right now. You never should have kissed me, you liar—”
He hooked his arms under hers and lifted Grace to his chest. In one swift move, he strode into the bedroom and lay over her on his bed. His hand covered her hand, and he pressed her palm against his cock. “Call me a liar again, babe. Tell me I don’t want you again.”
“Then why won’t you kiss me?” she whispered hoarsely.
“Because you’re a damsel in fuckin’ distress, and I’m the goddamn big bad wolf. I’m what you will regret.”
She froze, unable to believe what he had just said.
Callum released her hand and cupped her cheek. “I have wanted you too long to blow it because I’m an impatient asshole.”
The heavy air in her lungs wisped away, and she couldn’t take a deep enough breath. “I promise you’re not.”
His thumb smoothed over her skin. “You are going to regret me.”
Her eyelids sank shut. “I could never regret what I’ve always wanted.”
He brushed his lips over hers.
She opened her eyes, and those stormy eyes she never knew how to read were now an open book. Worry mixed with hunger. Arousal warred with apprehension. “I need you, Callum. More than anything you’re worried about.”
He kissed her again. Sweet and soft yet shimmery bursts of electricity sparked from the touch. Her tongue tested his resolve, running over his full bottom lip. His breath shook. She made Callum Hale quake. Absolutely impossible, but it was true.
His forehead dropped to hers, and his chest expanded as if he were sucking in all the oxygen in the room. Callum eased his body against her, his hips pressed to Grace, weight settling between her bare legs.
“I’m not fucking you right now.” His fingertips skimmed from her cheek down her neck. He traced the line of her collarbone and followed the thin strap of her bra, following the fabric until he teased along the cup. “Not because I don’t want to.”
She trembled under the pads of his fingers. “Because you’re cruel and awful.”
His lips quirked. “Because I want to take my time.” He dragged his knuckles gently over the spilling mound of her breast, then over her bra again.
She whimpered. Touch me. Tease me. Take me. God, please, be inside me.
“Because it’s not the right time.” Callum eased to her side.
He trailed his fingers down the valley of her breasts and over her soft stomach.
A trail of goosebumps followed. He teased over the waist of her underwear and slowly slid his palm lower and lower until he cupped her pussy. Dark hunger flared in his eyes.
His eyes locked on hers as he slipped his fingers under the fabric and caressed her slick skin. There was no hiding her need.
Callum dragged in a strangled breath. “Are you okay?”
“I swear,” her voice shook, “I will hate you if you stop.”
His smile crooked with a silent rumble of laughter, but he whispered, “The things I will do to you with just my hand.”
“Callum…”
He dragged the fabric down her legs and pressed his cinnamon kiss to her mouth. Sweet and slow, his tongue slid against hers as his fingers dipped and danced, coating the digits in her arousal.
“Spread your legs for me.” His deft fingers teased her seam, easing her open to his touch. “All mine.”
She nodded into his kiss.
He pressed into her, testing her body and giving her more until his thick fingers filled her.
Her hips writhed. In and out, bending his fingers just enough, letting her ride his hand as she drowned in the onslaught of kisses.
Like he knew how badly she needed this orgasm, his hand never stopped moving, teasing, bringing her closer and closer to the edge. “Callum…”
She reached for him and palmed the erection straining against his pants.
“Not yet.” He smoothed his thumb over her clit, circling until she could cry. Her ragged breath quickened. His fingers thrust into her again and matched the way her body moved. The hungry lift of her hips begged for more.
“I need…” She couldn’t think. The buildup of this orgasm was too much. “Callum.”
“Give me your hand,” he said against her lips. “Touch yourself.”
Her fingers dropped to her clit.
His tongue speared her mouth. She rubbed herself as his fingers fucked her, driving her to the edge of a detonation she would never recover from.
“Fuck, baby. Come for me.”
Bright white lightning rolled over her. Heated bliss tore through her, and she bucked on his hand, crying out his name, riding the explosion until it became too much.
Her back arched, panting and boneless, he didn’t stop. Heaven started building again before she caught her breath.
“One more,” he whispered against her ear.
Another orgasm rolled through before the first one finished. Every part of her flew high.
This was better than she could fathom, and he let her bask in that pleasure.
Carefully Callum wrapped her trembling, gasping body to his chest and held her until she was limp and loose and thoroughly melted in his arms.