Chapter 13 Roman
ROMAN
Amber curled against me, her breasts smashed against my chest. Her legs bracketed over mine. And her pussy grinding against my erection.
Carried away by the heat of her kisses, the desperation of her hold, I grunted at the potent hit of desire that chased away all that I’d felt before. The fear of something happening to her or my children. The anger that those assholes had broken in at all.
All I felt with her on my lap and tangling her tongue with mine was this.
This wickedly delicious thrill of lust. The bone-deep satisfaction of her responding so sensually, so eagerly, like she, too, wouldn’t last without having this connection.
Wet kisses. Possessive touches. And all the heavy, panted breaths we managed.
We broke for air, and she fell back to it.
“What if—”
I growled, kissing her again. Bracing one hand on her back and the other on the base of her skull, I parted her lips and sucked on her sweet tongue.
And again, as our hearts raced and we ran out of air, she looked at me with a trace of that panic.
“Amber.” I shook my head as I stood. Hoisting her into my arms, I spun to place her on the bed. Without letting much space between us as I moved, I followed her down. She lay on her back, frowning up at me as I braced myself over her.
We weren’t jostling around too much. We were still whispering to keep it down.
She was still in her head, still scared and prone to those panicky what-ifs. I knew she had questions, but I also was aware that telling her the truth, that those men weren’t going to bother her because I’d killed them, would be too much for her to process.
“Focus on me,” I urged her. “On this.”
I kissed her again, triumphant when she went lax and gentle, kissing me back and wrapping her arms around me again.
“Focus on how you feel,” I whispered in her ear as I pulled her shirt off.
She lifted her arms, letting the thin camisole go free.
Lying beneath me, bare from her waist up, she treated me to a sight I wanted to feast on every day until I died. Her breasts rose and fell with how fast she breathed. Her dark-pink nipples puckered, beading up under my gaze. Damn, was she something else. Exquisite. And all mine for the taking.
“Focus on this,” I told her as I kissed her and rolled one nipple between my fingers.
She gasped into my mouth, a precious, quiet response.
When she started arching her back and hooking her leg around my hips, I pulled back to stare into her dazed emerald orbs. “Stay with me, Amber. Feel me. And feel us.”
I only took my mouth off hers to suck on her nipples, one bud, then the other, but as she whimpered and clawed at me, I took the hint and gave her more.
After easing her shorts off, I brought my fingers to her pussy. Stroking back and forth, I collected the sticky cream of her arousal. And with a deep kiss as I pinned her to the bed, I slipped one finger, then another, into her tight sheath.
Her mouth hung open as she watched my face. Locked on her stare, I made sure she was doing just as I asked. To be here, present, with me at this moment. Not stuck in the worries filling her head.
“You good?” I asked.
“More,” she begged softly. “Make me come, please. More, Roman.”
I smiled as I leaned down to kiss her deeply, pistoning my fingers into her tight, slick cunt.
When she was bucking against me, her brow furrowed as she struggled to go for what she wanted, I eased back to shove my sweatpants off. “Feel good?” I asked.
She pouted, reaching to pull me all the way over her again as she parted her legs wider, welcoming me between her thighs. “Please.”
“You sure?” I asked. Until she begged, I was fine to pleasure her. Making her come would take the edge off. Once she was asleep, I could fuck my hand in the shower to relax again.
But if she wanted this, if she wanted me to fuck her, it had to be on my terms.
My cousin and brother were tougher. Rougher.
Before they met their wives, they were more about what they could take than what they could give with women.
It was a common mindset in the family, a traditional part of the status quo among organized crime families.
The harder the man, the more they’d take as they pleased.
Not me. I always wanted consent. Not because it was a permission I had to have before a good fuck, but a conquest. Hearing a woman agree to wanting me was the ultimate chase. The final reward. Knowing that I could convince a woman to the brink of desperation was proof that I’d won them over.
But with Amber, with my dick rock hard as I rubbed it against her soft thigh, and with her making my mind twist with too many possessive thoughts, I wanted to know she was ready.
She was so young. So na?ve. So skittish. Gaining her trust was all due to my patience and my ability to tolerate blue balls.
Maybe it was fucked up that I was setting her up to need me like this after the break-in, but I wasn’t going to dwell on it.
She felt too good, so soft and sensual in my arms.
She sounded too naughty, mewling and moaning so quietly as I played with her.
“Are you sure?” I repeated.
It wasn’t a test whether she’d let me. It was the final challenge for me to know that I’d beaten her at this game of resistance.
“Please, Roman.” She cinched her legs around me and lifted up to brush her pussy over my dick.
I grunted at the visceral reaction that hit me. Tensing and growling lightly, I kissed her possessively.
“Just to feel good,” I added, needing her to know the difference.
She nodded before kissing me again.
“Just sex,” I warned, like I had many, many times in my life, always needing to be upfront and clear.
“Please,” she repeated, panting like she would pass out from sheer frustration if I didn’t ram into her now.
“I can’t give you more than that. I want you to feel good, Amber. To stay with me in this moment and forget about everything else.”
Again, she nodded and pierced me with an impatient stare. “Please,” she begged once more.
Closing my eyes as I lowered to kiss her, I gripped my shaft and rubbed it over her slick entrance. Slippery and warm, she urged me to just sink in, to line up and plow into her.
But it couldn’t be over too fast. I’d spent over two months tormenting myself with wanting her.
Two months of being impatient to have her when she’d lower her guard.
It was shitty timing that it would take a break-in to convince her to throw caution to the wind and embrace me like this, but I’d take it.
And I’d take her. All she’d let me have.
She arched against me as I stroked my dick over her entrance, rubbing to give more friction on her clit. Before I’d risk coming too soon, or making her so frustrated that she’d protest loudly and wake the babies sleeping in their portable cribs, I notched the head of my cock at her pussy.
Kissing her again, I almost missed the slight tension in her body. That flinch. That stiffening reaction that worried me.
But as she hugged me tighter and slid her tongue alongside mine with a light moan that I felt more than heard, I dismissed it.
Driving into her slowly, I sucked on her flesh and tasted the salt of her skin. Inch by inch, I stuffed my cock into the tight, wet heat of her pussy.
All the way. To the hilt.
I rammed into her until I couldn’t go any further.
Waiting for a moment, watching the expressions cross over her face, I marveled at how right this was. How perfectly we fit together. A swelling sense of completion tightened my chest, but I ignored it. Admiring the impatience and awe that she showed me, I kissed her tenderly.
“So… good. I’m so full. I feel like you’re ripping me apart,” she whispered. “But so… good.”
I nuzzled her neck, nipping and licking at her delectable flesh as I pulled out slowly.
“So…” Her breath hitched as I rammed in again. “Good.”
It was. This was fucking amazing, feeling her squeeze me and suck me in.
With the cushion of her breasts pillowing my chest, her hard nipples abraded against my pecs, I dropped my hips to fully grind against all of her.
To rub and stroke and caress every inch of her.
Inside and out, I wanted to explore and mark her as mine. As mine to fuck and pleasure tonight.
Because as she started to furrow her brow and stare at me with a plea she couldn’t voice, I knew she was coming soon. And because the victory of making her come on my dick was such a heady reward to welcome, I slowed down my thrusts and tried to pace myself.
All so I could get my head back on straight.
That this was just sex.
Not a commitment.
Not a lifetime promise.
I meant every word when I vowed that I would do all I could to keep her safe. But promising myself to her? My heart, my soul?
I couldn’t. Even with her and how right she felt in my life, wrapped around me and sheathing my dick, I couldn’t take that leap of faith.
She could acquiesce and tell me that she wanted me.
That she was desperate for me to stuff my cock in her and make her come.
But that didn’t have to mean anything past it.
She could still be like Olga, my aunt who never wanted my uncle. Maybe it was because I’d been so young when I realized she’d never wanted to be a wife. Or maybe it was because I’d been raised by Mikhail and surrounded by ruthless men.
I didn’t know. All I could swear on was that I wasn’t ready to commit to Amber. To any woman. Because my heart was one thing that I’d never be able to reclaim and patch if she wanted to destroy it.
“Roman…” she whispered.
That was all it took to make me insane. Rabid. Hearing her sweet passion, her desperation for me…
I whipped my hips faster, fucking her without making too much noise.
It felt wrong, knowing my son and daughter slept in the same room. But they were asleep and obviously not watching—if their eyes could even sharpen to see us over here on the bed.
It felt so fucking right, too, knowing that Amber had given me the reward of her trust.
She jerked against me, stiffening as her pussy tightened around my dick. As she came, fast and with a tremor racing through her, I held her locked to me and pounded into her again. Again. And again.
While she still gasped against my mouth, her sounds muffled by my lips sealed to hers, I gave up on my control to come.
No longer willing or able to hold back, I flooded her with my cum and tightened my arms around her, holding her still as she rode through the waves of her orgasm while a powerful one crashed into me and left me feeling spent, dizzy, but secure that this couldn’t ever be considered a mistake when a rare bliss encompassed me.