44~Can you not hate me now that Im dead? #3
"I refuse to sit here and watch you punish yourself."
"He kidnapped you."
"He almost killed you."
"You should be thanking God that you're alive today."
She paused before asking softly,
"If he had succeeded in killing you... would you still be feeling guilty for him in your death?"
Hanan lowered her head.
Unable to answer, she burst into tears once again.
"Cry."
Nanny Ann wrapped her tightly in her embrace.
"It's okay to cry."
Just then, the doorbell rang.
"Samira!" Nanny Ann called toward the hallway. "Please get the door."
"Yes, Ma."
The young house help hurried away.
Moments later, Hanan heard a familiar voice.
"Is Hanan around?"
"Yes, Ma. Please come in."
The next second, Amira rushed inside.
The moment she saw Hanan's tear
stained face, her own tears began to fall.
Without saying a word, she threw her arms around Hanan.
The two friends held each other tightly as another wave of tears washed over them.
An hour later, they finally retired to Hanan's room.
They lay side by side on the bed, wrapped in each other's embrace.
The silence between them was strangely comforting.
"How have you been?" Hanan finally asked.
"As well as I can be." Amira smiled sadly. "And you?"
Hanan sighed. "Good... and bad."
She looked down.
"But the bad became worse after we broke up."
Amira swallowed hard. "I owe you so many apologies."
She looked Hanan in the eye. "I'm so sorry for refusing to listen to you back then... I only discovered the truth after Amina told me everything."
"I wanted to come to you... But I felt too ashamed to face you."
"It wasn't until I heard about Faruk's death that I finally found the courage."
Hanan managed a faint smile. "It's okay. I understand."
"If I were in your shoes..." She let out a weak laugh. "I probably would've reacted the same way... maybe even worse."
Relief washed over Amira's face when she heard Hanan laugh.
"Faruk loved me..."
Hanan whispered.
"But I never loved him."
She looked at Amira.
"Does that make me cruel?"
"No." Amira answered without hesitation. "It's not cruel to be unable to love someone back."
She sighed.
"And honestly... I don't think he truly loved you."
"He was obsessed."
"I noticed it back in university."
Hanan closed her eyes briefly.
"And now... he killed himself because of me."
Amira gently squeezed her hand.
"No. I believe he acted out of shame... pride... and the consequences of his own choices."
"If he truly loved you... He would've never tried to kill you."
She smiled softly.
"Let him become part of your past. Okay?"
Hanan nodded slowly. "I'm just glad you're here."
Amira smiled. "And I'm here to stay."
"I'm never leaving you again."
The two friends smiled at each other before embracing once more.
A gentle knock sounded on the door.
"Come in."
Samira stepped inside carrying a tray with dinner... and a brown envelope.
"Thank you, Samira."
Hanan shook her head.
"But I don't have an appetite."
Before Samira could leave, Amira stopped her.
"Leave it."
She pulled the tray toward herself.
"If she isn't eating... I'll gladly eat both portions."
She grinned, already reaching for the plates of fried rice and chicken.
"And Uncle Abdul asked me to give you this." Samira handed the envelope to Hanan.
"He just got back."
Hanan accepted it. "Who is it from?"
"I'm not sure."
Samira pointed to the handwriting.
"It says it's from... Late Faruk."
Silence.
Hanan slowly lowered her gaze to the envelope.
Then she looked at Amira.
Amira was already staring back at her.
Neither of them spoke.
The envelope had a bloody thumbprint beneath the words
"Late Faruk."
The moment Hanan saw it, a chill ran through her body. Fear filled her chest, and for a split second, she was tempted to throw the letter away without opening it.
"Did... did he write that himself?" Amira asked, staring at the dried bloodstain.
Hanan swallowed hard before nodding.
"He did." Her voice was barely above a whisper. "This is his handwriting."
Amira let out a slow sigh, shaking her head in disbelief.
"That crazy guy..." She muttered. "He even introduced himself as Late Faruk."
Hanan didn't respond.
She stared at the envelope for another moment before tightening her grip around it.
"I'll read it... privately."
She rose from the bed and walked into the bathroom, locking the door behind her.
Leaning against the sink, she closed her eyes and took several deep breaths, trying to steady her trembling hands.
Only after gathering enough courage did she carefully tear the envelope open.
Inside was a neatly folded letter.
With unsteady fingers, she unfolded it and began to read.
Dear Hanan,
I'm sorry.
Can you not hate me now that I'm dead?
I know it's a ridiculous thing to ask, especially after everything I've done to you, but... I'm sorry.
I realized my mistakes far too late, please forgive me.
If there truly is another life after this one...
Can we be friends again?
This time...
I promise not to fall in love with you.
.
.
.
***