Chapter thirty-six
Melody
Six Months Later
I’m going to graduate early. I took some advanced track classes that put me ahead by a whole year. I wish you were here to celebrate with me.
Irest my phone down on the library’s table, finally able to step foot in this place without breaking down into tears.
This is the very table that Kaden and I were at a year ago, and it still hurts, but I’m not as broken as I once was.
I’ve focused on my classes, dove headfirst into research, and even joined a sorority.
This has been the hardest battle I’ve ever had to face, but I pulled myself out of my grief and learned to navigate life without Kaden by my side. I’ve reached the final stop on this tour—acceptance.
It’s not freeing or even joyous. There’s still a pit in my stomach any time I think about the night everything changed. There’s still that image of Kaden down on his knees, crying brokenly. Those memories will never fade, and I think he’ll always hold a place in my heart.
But I can’t keep waiting around for someone who doesn’t want me. No matter how much it pains me to let go of him.
“Stop calling and texting,“ Dr. Harris’s pointed words bounce around my head in a reminder. “A step to healing is relinquishing it from your grasp. You can’t control everything, and that’s okay.”
Some habits die hard.
I try to stop, but it’s like the little voice in my head encourages me.
Keep going.
What if this is the one time he answers?
Wait for him.
It’s silly, but there’s a big part of me that only knew Kaden’s comfort and compassion—the warmth he held for me and me alone. It’s hard to separate from that part of yourself when it has defined you for such a long time.
Every day I say I’ll try.
And every day I pull up our messages.
My phone vibrates, and my eyes snap to it. The screen lights up with a name I haven’t seen scroll across it in a year.
Kaden.
My heart leaps as I shoot forward and rip it to my ear. My hands shake as I slide the green button and answer. “Hello?”
“Who is this?” A male voice I don’t recognize asks, laced with sleep as if they’ve just risen for the day.
My heart drops into my stomach, settling heavily as I sit back in my chair. “Is Kaden there?”
“Who?”
“Kaden Wilder,” I say, picking at my lip.
“Never heard of him,” the man groans, and I hear the sounds of sheets rustling. “Listen, lady, I got this number yesterday after changing my cell phone plan.”
“Oh…“ My bottom lip wobbles as tears sting the bridge of my nose. “That’s—” I clear my throat, battling past the emotions gripping me. “That’s my bad. This was my brother’s number before he went missing.”
The man sighs heavily. “I’m a fucking asshole. I’m sorry about your brother.”
I blink past my blurry vision. “It’s okay. I’ll leave you alone. Sorry, again.”
He hangs up, and my arm falls to the table. My phone clatters across the surface as I stare straight ahead at the bookshelves in front of me.
He changed his number.
The same number he had since we were kids.
Wetness tracks down my face, and I weakly swipe at it, smearing my tears across my cheek.
I have no choice but to let go now.
This is it.
There is no closure.
Someone scrapes a chair across the ground near me before shoving their backpack onto the table and plopping down. They catch my attention, and it seems I’ve caught theirs as we both turn to look at each other.
Dylan.
He’s filled out a little more since I last saw him. After The Hunt, he dropped his Botany 101 class, and I’ve caught glimpses of him across campus. We haven’t spoken since then…
His eyes widen. “Oh, shit. Are you okay?”
I sniffle, wiping my cheeks quickly as I give him a watery smile. “Our first time speaking in a year, and I’m blubbering like a baby.”
He turns to fully face me before just snatching up his things and taking the seat next to me. “Do you want to talk about what’s got you blubbering in the library on a Saturday night?”
I swallow, frowning down at my hands. “Have you ever been through a really bad breakup before?”
He blows out a breath. “Plenty. You’re talking to the breakup champion of North campus. Two-time dumpee.”
A laugh escapes me. It’s wet and broken, but still a laugh.
“That’s the sound we like to hear,” he points at me with a wide, charming grin.
I shake my head, wiping under my eyes. “I can’t believe I’m crying in the quiet section.”
He sucks his teeth. “First of all, this place is aggressively quiet. Let’s call it emotional manipulation. You could sneeze, and old Greta at the front desk would glare at you like you committed tax fraud.”
Another laugh bubbles from me, not sounding as wet as it did before. “Her name is Rebecca.”
“That’s what I said,” he waves a hand before resting his elbows on his knees and hanging his head. “Okay, Melody. Give it to me straight. On a scale of ‘he forgot my birthday’ to ‘he started a cult and drank the Kool-Aid’, how bad are we talking?”
My mood dies down a little as I rest back in my chair. I haven’t told anyone a single word about this. Not even Kodi.
“He lied to me about who he was,” I say as I rub the hem of my shirt between my fingers. “I ended things because I thought he was different, but it was all a lie.”
“Okay…” he says carefully. “That feels like it skipped past the birthday thing and landed somewhere along the lines of a professional gaslighter.”
I exhale sharply, staring down at the floor between our shoes. “I just…wanted him to be who I thought he was.”
“Of course you did,” he nudges my tennis shoes with his. “You don’t date someone hoping they’re secretly a villain.”
I snort, feeling the lightest I have in months. “I don’t know. I do like fictional villains.”
Dylan rolls his eyes. “Yeah, because they’re morally grey and broody with lots of money. Real-life villains are guys named Kyle who live with their mom and punch holes in drywall any time they get angry.”
I laugh, my tears slowly drying up.
Dylan smiles softly before continuing with a gentle tone. “Did you find out something specific, or was it like the mask slipped?”
I consider his question before wincing. “Both…”
His eyes widen. “Both? Talk about an emotional body slam.” He swallows, frowning at the table. “You don’t have to give me specifics, you know? If you just want to vent, that’s totally fine. I don’t have anywhere else to be.”
For the first time in a long time, a genuine smile tugs at my lips. Dylan isn’t coming on to me or expecting anything in return. He’s here to listen, and after a year of radio silence, that’s extra points in my book.