Chapter 34
Chapter thirty-four
Helen
Something’s changed since the day Jamie took me surfing. A subtle shift in Teddy. He’s lighter. More confident. Focused in a way he wasn’t before. That charming, cocky little brother of Gwen, the one who flirted with me like it was breathing, is back in full force, and now he’s everywhere.
Walking out of the shower with water sliding down his muscled, tattooed chest.
Lounging on my couch, idly toying with his nipple ring.
Leaning in doorways with his biceps flexed like he’s the goddamn cover model from one of my favorite romance books.
Add in Jamie, who’s become a daily fixture in my living room and likes to show up shirtless, dripping, surfboard in tow, and I’m about to lose my mind.
I am surrounded. Swamped. Testosterone practically swirls in the air. Everywhere I look, it’s naked male body parts. It’s distracting in the most erotic, unfair way. I practically walk around my house with my hands over my eyes just to get anything done.
The worst part? I’m pretty sure Teddy knows exactly what he’s doing.
His eyes track me, slow and heated. He sits closer on the couch now.
Takes up more space in the hallway, so I’m forced to brush against him when I pass.
That tiny contact sends heat rippling across my skin like he’s a blowtorch set on high.
My breath hitches.
He smirks, all smug and satisfied. Like he’s accomplished his goal.
Now we’re with my parents on Jamie’s boat.
Teddy’s wearing a shirt, which is a relief and a tragedy all at once.
We start the boat parade with Teddy at the helm driving, looking infuriatingly good.
One hand on the oversized silver wheel, his cast stretched out in front of him like it belongs there.
The white Christmas lights his housemates strung along the railings glow across his face, catching in his lashes, softening his jaw. It’s too much.
I look away, then back. Away again. Then back, like a broken compass.
It’s fine. I’m fine. Just a completely normal human woman trying not to ogle her fake boyfriend while her real parents are sitting ten feet away. The man is literally glowing like a Christmas miracle, and I’m trying to remember how to blink.
At this point, even his injury is hot. What kind of messed-up holiday rom-com am I living in?
Jamie’s rigged up a massive fake Christmas tree, somehow mounted to spin in a slow, hypnotic circle that sets the shiny ornaments swaying.
He’s also installed huge speakers in the rear corners.
They blast holiday classics like Jingle Bell Rock, Little Drummer Boy, and Deck the Halls into the salty winter air.
Downstairs in the boat’s small cabin are snacks and appetizers, plus a huge pitcher of eggnog.
I carry a cup up for myself and another for Teddy, who accepts it with a smile.
I’m three big sips in when I realize it’s spiked with rum.
“Yum, this is tasty but strong,” I tell Teddy, who puts the drink aside with a slight grimace.
He’s still off alcohol. I take another sip.
The drink is good, sweet with nutmeg and cinnamon, but the rum burns as it slides down my throat.
I cough into my fist. “I’d better be careful.
Don’t want to fall off the boat and end up on Santa’s naughty list.”
Teddy laughs. “If that’s the criteria, then I’m screwed. Last New Year’s Eve Jamie and I got so wasted we couldn’t find our way home. We had to call Anthony to come get us. Turns out we were two houses away.”
I laugh with him, but a little part of me wonders if he was drinking that much because of me. Was Teddy sad when he came back from New York after Christmas? Was it possible he was missing me all those months ago?
Surely not. I’m probably reading too much into it.
I glance over at Jamie, who’s chatting up my parents over by the tree. Mom throws her head back laughing over something he said, and even my dad is grinning.
Teddy follows my gaze. “Your parents love Jamie,” he says, and something bitter slips into his voice. “No surprise there. Everyone does.” His hands tighten on the wheel. “Maybe Jamie should be your fake boyfriend. Your dad clearly likes him more than me.”
I pat his shoulder in mock sympathy. “Don’t worry. You’re the only fake boyfriend for me.”
That makes him chuckle. “Gee. Thanks.”
Teddy’s old housemates Anthony and Gina are also on the boat with us.
Anthony stays close to Gina, with his arm possessively wrapped around her waist. For her part, Gina keeps sneaking glances at Teddy.
Lingering looks. The kind filled with longing.
Once I openly catch her staring at Teddy.
When she sees me, she sends a glare so full of venom my mouth goes dry.
When she said hello to me earlier, she pretended like she barely knew me.
Like we’d never had that sidewalk showdown outside of my dance studio.
Spoiler alert. It’s not you.
“It’s official. Gina hates me,” I tell Teddy.
“No way.” He smiles up at me. “You’re imagining it.”
“I’m not,” I insist, wanting to tell him about that earlier conversation but deciding not to. I don’t want to sound bitter, insecure, or, worse, needy. “We’re trapped in a fake dating love rectangle.”
“Rectangle?” He laughs, and I love the sound. Teddy happy is the most beautiful thing. He lights up when he’s happy. He glows.
“Yes. You, me, Gina, and Anthony. A love rectangle. It makes me feel bad. I almost want to reassure her it isn’t real, that we aren’t together.”
Maybe I should say it again. Maybe she’d believe it this time.
“Yeah. Right.” Teddy looks out at the water, his voice quieter now. “Not real.”
Boats decorated with all manner of lights, trees, and inflatable snowmen bob along the water in a cheerful line ahead and behind us, each one brighter and more over-the-top than the last. Holiday music blares from speakers, and the scent of cocoa and cinnamon seems to float on the breeze.
Crowds gather along the docks, bundled in festive sweaters, waving and cheering.
We smile and wave back at a group of children who wear matching Christmas pajamas, their cheeks flushed with excitement.
After I finish my eggnog, Teddy waves Jamie over to take the wheel.
I’ve been quietly stressing about Teddy and his crutches on the slick deck, but he handles it like a pro, steady and sure-footed as we make our way to the front of the boat where it narrows into a pointed bow.
We lean over the edge, the water gliding beneath us in dark, rippling streaks, the soft splash of waves brushing the hull.
Suddenly, Teddy steps in close, his chest flush against my back, surrounding me with his warmth. Heat rises beneath my skin in a rush. We haven’t touched this much since that time at my parents’ house.
“Teddy?”
“Let’s re-create that scene from Titanic,” he murmurs, his breath warm against my ear. “I’ve always wanted to try.”
“Okay,” I say, giggling at the idea.
“Hold out your arms,” Teddy instructs me.
I do it, spreading my arms out on each side, I lean as far forward as I can go and pretend like I’m flying. Teddy holds me by the waist so I don’t fall.
“There,” he says. “Isn’t this how it was in the movie?”
I laugh again. “It’s been a while, but I think so.” My arms are still out when Teddy’s lips graze the side of my neck. My shiver has nothing to do with the cool night air swirling around us.
“What’re you doing?” I ask, my voice a little too high.
“Being a good fake boyfriend. Your parents are watching.” He’s right.
When I look over, both my parents are staring.
My mom with a grin. My dad with a scowl.
I lean back into Teddy, slightly. Just enough for both of us to feel it.
I tell myself it’s to show my dad that we’re a couple, but that’s a lie.
The truth is that I do it because I like the feeling of his body next to mine.
I close my eyes, spread my arms a little wider, feel his chin settle on my shoulder, and just breathe, savoring this moment. This feeling of closeness.
After a long moment, he shifts until his lips are almost on my neck. Teddy’s breath stirs the tiny hairs on my skin, and I shiver.
“You’re cold,” he murmurs, his voice low and flirty. “Bet I could keep you warm without even trying.”
I swallow hard and open my eyes. “Is that part of your fake boyfriend duties?”
“Of course.” His hands slide slightly at my waist, thumbs moving under the edge of my sweater to graze the exposed sliver of skin there. “I take my role very seriously.”
I should step away. Make a joke. Remind him this is pretend.
I don’t. Because my body is humming, my breath shallow, and when I glance down at the reflection in the window, our bodies silhouetted together against the water and twinkling lights, I like what I see.
Teddy leans in, just enough to ghost his lips over my ear. “I could kiss you?” he whispers. “You know. Really sell it for your dad.”
God, the way my pulse spikes.
He’s messing with me. I know he is, but his voice is velvet and heat and mischief, and it takes every ounce of my dignity to keep from tilting my head in invitation.
“That won’t be necessary,” I manage, aiming for breezy but hitting breathless. “You’ve already terrified him sufficiently.”
Teddy chuckles against my skin. “You sure? I’m a hard worker. I hate to underperform.”
Are we still talking about the fake boyfriend thing?
His fingers tighten at my waist, not possessive but purposeful. Enough to make me feel every inch of him. The muscles in his chest. The strength in his hands. He’s so close I can barely think. Everything feels too loud. The music, the water, the thud of my own heart.
“You’ve made your point,” I say softly, but I don’t pull away.
His nose brushes the curve of my jaw. “Not sure I have.”
Suddenly it’s not so funny anymore. There’s something serious in the way he says it. Something that makes my breath catch. I twist slightly to face him, our bodies still pressed together at the hips. He’s watching me, his gaze dark and intent. Not playful now. Not teasing.
There’s a question in his eyes, but before I can answer it, before I can even figure out what he’s asking, Jamie calls out from the wheel, “Hey, everyone! Let’s take a picture before the parade ends.”
I jerk back. “We’ll be right there!” I answer, my voice overly bright.
Teddy lets me go and grins, all innocent charm again. “Back to work,” he says, like we’re actors on a stage. He tucks a strand of hair behind my ear, and I hate how gentle it feels.
We walk back toward the others. My mom slips an arm around me, her eyes shining. “Isn’t it wonderful?” she whispers. “The very best night.”
“So great,” I say automatically. But my gaze is drifting, finding Teddy across the deck, laughing with Jamie like nothing happened, which is true, nothing did happen, but I almost wanted it to.
For the first time, I’m not sure which version of us is pretend and which is real.