Chapter 15
Chapter Fifteen
Nelly opened the door and set her bag down in its usual spot, feeling light and free.
December was a fabulous month, and she had been having so much fun with her students in the classroom.
Of course, they were still learning, but they were also making decorations and talking about what their families were going to do over the Christmas vacation, which was still weeks away but still exciting to think about.
The anticipation, to Nelly, was some of the best parts of Christmas.
Of course, it probably didn’t hurt that tonight she was going to be meeting with her Secret Saint partner. Of course not.
“Good evening, Gram. What a wonderful day!” she said as her gram shuffled over to the door.
“Who are you?” Gram said, and Nelly’s spirits plummeted immediately.
Her gram didn’t recognize her?
She’d been doing so well for so long that Nelly had almost convinced herself that whatever had been wrong with her gram had been just a temporary thing that her grandma had gotten through.
“Gram, it’s me, Nelly.”
“Is your horse parked outside?”
“What?” Nelly said, blinking. That threw her for a loop.
“You’re not going to keep me in here. I can get out if I want to.
” She shuffled forward faster like she was going to plow through Nelly.
Nelly wasn’t sure what to do, and the door was still open.
She reached forward, but before she could touch her gram, her grandma’s foot must have caught on the coffee table at the end of the couch, and she lost her balance, tripping and crashing into the lamp, which flew to the floor, and she somehow managed to tip over the coffee table, although her gram leaned against the couch, not quite landing on the floor as Nelly rushed forward to grab a hold of her and help her.
“Let go of me! I’ll scream for help!” Gram said.
Nelly had no idea what to do. Did she continue to try to help her gram to keep her from falling and breaking something? Or did she let her go so she wouldn’t upset her?
What would that matter? Nelly wasn’t doing anything wrong.
But her grandma was very agitated when she got near, so she tried to stay close, just in case her grandma lost her balance. She balanced on the arm of the couch, and for now, she was fine.
“Are you okay, Grandma?” she asked, really worried.
Not just for Gram’s mental issue, but had she hurt herself in all the confusion?
She didn’t think that she’d seen anything that would actually hurt her gram, but sometimes accidents could be really weird, and things happened so fast that it was easy to miss something.
“I’m just fine. Who are you again?”
“Is everything okay in here?” a voice asked from the open doorway.
It was a familiar voice, and as Nelly spun around, she understood why it was familiar.
Roland. Of course, he would be in the area. Looking past him, she could see a Christmas tree wrapped and lying on the porch. He must have been delivering it to someone.
Of all the people who could be going by when something was happening at her house, it would have to be him.
“Young man, this woman just walked into my house unannounced, and she was trying to grab me.”
“Are you okay?” Roland asked, his voice calm and reassuring. His eyes flicked to Nelly, and he lifted his brows a little. He knew this was where she lived too. But he shook his head a bit and moved forward slowly. “Can I help you stand up, ma’am?”
“Yes, please. It’s so nice that there are still kind people in the world.” She sighed. “Sometimes I just don’t know how clumsy I can be.”
Roland walked around Nelly and took a hold of her gram’s elbow, carefully straightening her from the arm of the couch while Nelly went around and picked up the lamp, which surprisingly hadn’t shattered everywhere, and straightened up the coffee table.
“Sometimes coffee tables just come out of nowhere,” Roland quipped, making Nelly smile, despite her concern and fear. What was going on with her grandma?
“That’s what happened. It just jumped right out.” Her gram sounded a lot more like her old self.
“You didn’t hurt yourself, did you, Nelly?” she asked, and Nelly just about fell over.
“You know who I am?” Nelly asked, and while she hated the vulnerability in her voice, she couldn’t quite bring herself to be confident.
“Of course. My granddaughter. You’re getting home from school.
I guess I must have been coming out to greet you, although I kind of blacked out on that part,” her gram said.
Then she looked up at Roland. “It was awfully nice of you to help me out. I’m not quite the featherweight that I used to be, and I might be a little bit much for Nelly to handle.
She needs a good strong man in her life,” she said, tapping on Roland’s arm like he was the good strong man that she needed.
As if.
There was no way. Now, her Secret Saint partner, on the other hand…
No, she wasn’t going to think about that right now.
Although, she was still struggling with whether or not it was okay to have feelings and an emotional attachment for someone that she didn’t even know.
He was obviously a Christian, and he was concerned about pleasing the Lord and living a life that followed what the Bible commanded, not just being a Christian in name only.
Like Roland.
Except…Roland was gently helping her gram over to the recliner and convincing her to sit down for a moment, after she admitted to having a dizzy spell.
“Maybe a glass of water would help?” he asked.
“I suppose I wouldn’t mind getting one. Although, why don’t you just stay right here, Nelly, and let Roland go grab a glass of water. It’s good to see a familiar face,” her grandma said.
Nelly hurried over, glad that her gram actually wanted her. She was feeling rather extraneous.
“Is it okay if I get a glass of water from the kitchen?” Roland asked in a low tone that she figured was meant for her ears only as they passed in the living room.
“Of course it is. Thank you,” she said, still not quite able to believe that Roland McBride was actually in her living room, helping her, and not mouthing off with a bunch of sarcastic comments and disagreeing with every word that came out of her mouth.
“Are you okay?” she asked her grandmother.
“It was just a little tumble. I didn’t even hit the floor. Why are you so worried?” Gram asked.
She didn’t know whether to be honest with her gram about her confusion or not. “You didn’t recognize me when I walked in the door.”
“I didn’t? Are you sure? I mean, maybe you had kind of a long day at school, and you’re exhausted. Perhaps you should take a nap.”
“I think I’m okay,” Nelly said slowly. Her grandma didn’t have any recollection of being confused. It was like the whole thing didn’t happen. She’d totally blocked it out.
“Maybe you should go get a glass of water for yourself. I’ll be okay here, and I want to talk to you a bit, but…you’re doing a lot. Maybe you’re just working a little too hard.”
She shook her head, but she did rise to her feet. Maybe she could meet Roland in the kitchen, and…she wasn’t sure. But a glass of water didn’t sound like a bad idea.
She hurried into the kitchen and met Roland as he shut the spigot off with a full glass in his hand.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to kind of make myself at home in your kitchen. I’d opened three cupboard doors before I found the ones with the glasses in them.”
“That’s not a bother at all. I appreciate you being here.
It’s… I suppose you were delivering a Christmas tree?
” she asked. Roland was not one of her contacts, but maybe he was one of her Secret Saint partner’s contacts, since her Secret Saint partner seemed to have no trouble getting Christmas trees when they needed them.
“I was. I heard a crash, and I think you yelped—it wasn’t quite a scream. The door was open… I’m sorry I kind of barged in.”
“No. I appreciate you making sure. If Grandma had fallen on the floor or needed an ambulance, I just—appreciate the help.”
He seemed as amazed as she did that they were actually having a civil conversation for the first time in their lives.
It really was the first time in their lives, and she thought back about it. She couldn’t remember them ever talking in a rational way before.
“I don’t want to tell you what to do or anything, but I have a little bit of experience with this. My mom’s mom lived with us for a while when she had dementia. It was a slowly progressing thing. Has she been checked out by a doctor?”
“No. I need to do that. But…I guess I’ve been in denial. And the episodes haven’t been that many or that long. And it’s Christmas.”
“Yeah. Everybody’s busy at Christmastime. You don’t want to add more to your schedule by shoving in a doctor’s appointment somewhere. I totally get it.”
“Yeah. But I don’t want to put it off.”
“Well, the doctor isn’t going to be able to do anything to help her. They’ll just give you some advice on how to handle things and what to look for and when she’s going to start needing full-time care.”
“When, not if?” she asked, and there was a part of her that was hoping, truly hoping that he would be able to tell her that once his gram moved in with them, she had gotten better and was better for a long time. But no such luck.
“Yeah. It gets progressively worse. They have a lot of good days and a few bad episodes, and it progresses to where she has good days and bad days, and then she has more bad days than good days, and then she pretty much never knows you.”
“Wow. That’s depressing.”
“It is. I’ve often wondered why? I mean, why is that the cycle of life, you know?”
“Wow. I’ve never even thought about it.”
“Yeah, I don’t know. I guess probably because of Grandma. But why does God allow that? Why don’t we just die? Why do we have to suffer and decline for so long?”
“Maybe it gives other people character by taking care of us?”
“Maybe. But we have babies for that, right?”