Chapter 17
Hollywood
The baby monitor crackled with sound. A moment later, a shrill voice jolted me. “Da! I wake!”
Tex groaned quietly and nestled deeper under the blankets.
I hurriedly reached out to turn down the volume.
He’d gotten home after one in the morning, crawled into bed, and whispered into my ear that he needed me.
Every part of me had woken up at those few words, and when he slipped under the blanket to take me into his mouth, I wasn’t entirely sure I wasn’t dreaming.
I dressed in sweats and a T-shirt and headed for the room I shared with Ruby—or at least used to. I hadn’t slept in my bed since last weekend. Ruby was already out of bed.
“Potty!” she said urgently.
I took her into the bathroom and helped her onto the toilet—because she refused to use the potty chair. “I use REAL potty!” she’d insisted while squirming with urgency.
I praised her as she finished. “You’re getting so good at that, Ruby! We might have to get you big girl underwear soon.”
Her eyes went wide. “Big girl?”
“Yep! You barely need diapers, huh? You use the potty like a big girl.”
“Ruby’s a big girl,” she said proudly.
I was secretly proud of myself, too. Just a week ago, helping Ruby with the potty had terrified me. Tex was so confident that I often let him take the lead. But I’d helped Ruby like a pro. Like a real-ass dad.
I got her dressed, settled with a bowl of Cheerios and some cartoons, and hopped into the shower. I kept it quick and skipped my usual styling routine. I didn’t want to leave Ruby too long or risk her waking up Tex.
I glanced at my towel-rumpled hair in the mirror and shook my head. Good thing I’d already gotten my man. There was a time I wouldn’t leave the house without a solid hour spent waxing and shaping my hair. Now, I was barely running a comb through it and rushing to get dressed.
When I got back to the living room—dressed in jeans and a blue polo—Ruby was exactly where I’d left her, though she was gnawing on her bunny rabbit pretty fiercely. I retrieved some cold yogurt from the fridge, grabbed the oral numbing gel, and joined her by the sofa.
She was through the worst of the teething—no more fever, thank goodness—but her gums still bothered her intermittently. Aiden’s advice had gone a long way to soothing us all, though.
“Want some nice cold yogurt?” I asked her.
She reached for it eagerly. It helped that she really liked it and had only had a few Cheerios for breakfast. I gave her the cold treat, tucked the gel in my pocket for later, and when she’d finished eating, I helped her pick out an outfit and get dressed.
We were nearly ready to go when a knock came at the door. When I opened it, Joyride stood on the porch, bags under his eyes, hair a greasy, unwashed mess.
I blinked. “What are you doing here?”
He lifted a drink carrier. “I got coffee at Mug Shots. Even got Ruby a little cocoa.”
“Okay…”
He bit his bottom lip. “I, uh, just needed to get out of the house. Thought I’d stop by and get my Ruby fix. I could take her to the park?”
“Actually, we’re headed out.”
His whole expression sagged. “Oh. Okay.” He nodded, looking forlorn. “I should have called first.”
Tex cleared his throat behind me. “What’s goin’ on?”
Shoot. I really hadn’t wanted to wake him up. I half turned. “Sorry. Go back to bed. Ruby and I were just leaving.”
Ruby ran to Tex, clinging to his legs, and he lifted her up and joined me by the door. He took one look at Joyride and snorted. “You’re a sorry sight. What the hell happened?”
Joyride grimaced. “Fight with my dad. Sorry. I figured you’d all be up early with Ruby or I wouldn’t have come by.”
“Tex is working nights now.” I turned toward him. “Seriously, go crash for a little while. Ruby and I will be at the rehab center for an hour or so.”
“And what about this sorry guy?” he said, gesturing to Joyride.
“He’s leaving.” I stepped onto the porch and nudged Joyride toward the steps. “C’mon. Tex needs to sleep. He’ll have Ruby all day.”
Joyride hesitated. “Want a coffee?”
“He doesn’t need—”
“Yeah,” Tex said. “I’ll take one.”
I shot him a look. He shrugged. “I’m up now. I feel all right. I’ll just enjoy some chill time alone until you’re back.” He hesitated. “Unless you want me to come along? I don’t want to intrude with Carrie, but…”
“No, stay. Relax. We’ll be back soon enough.”
Joyride handed him a coffee, and Tex sipped it. “Mm. Not bad. You’re hired.”
Joyride’s smile was sheepish. “Sorry for waking you up.”
“Don’t worry about it. I’d offer to let you stay, but I know I’m not the one you came to see.”
Joyride shifted. “Yeah, I think I’ve bothered you enough for one morning.”
I nudged Joyride. “You can come with me and Ruby. We’ll talk in the car.”
He looked uncertain. “Yeah? I don’t want to intrude.”
“You won’t. You can hang in the waiting room while we visit with Carrie.”
He nodded, his expression full of relief. “Sure, yeah. Whatever you want.”
I resisted the urge to turn and kiss Tex goodbye. He wasn’t ready for public displays of affection. But Ruby wasn’t so subtle. She leaned toward him, smacking her lips loudly, until he graced her with a forehead kiss.
“Be a good girl, Roo. See you soon.”
I made eye contact with him, saying with my eyes what I couldn’t say with my lips. “We’ll be back soon.”
“Take your time.”
He closed the door and I started down the porch steps, Joyride following on my heels.
“When are you guys going to admit you’re a couple?”
I turned a sharp look toward him. “Who said we were?”
He shrugged. “Kind of obvious, isn’t it? You eye-fucked him right in front of me.”
I let out an annoyed huff and focused on buckling Ruby into her seat because I knew Joyride was right. I was doing a shitty job hiding my feelings for Tex.
Joyride settled into the passenger seat of my Toyota, his cardboard drink carrier still in his lap. I started the car and adjusted my mirrors while he pried the coffees out of the holder and put them into the car’s cupholders.
“Sorry,” he said. “I opened my big mouth and stuck my foot in, like always.”
“No, it’s not that. Just…” I glanced sidelong. “You can’t say things like that to Tex.”
“I wouldn’t,” he said. “He’s kinda scary.”
I gave him a skeptical look as I reversed out of the parking spot. “Scarier than Knight?”
“Most of the time, yeah. Knight likes me.”
I chuckled. “Tex likes you too.”
“He hasn’t been overly friendly. I think he’s worried I’ve got the hots for you or something.”
I choked on my sip of coffee. “You don’t, do you?”
“No!” Joyride turned red. “I don’t see you like that. We’re friends, right?”
“Right. You’re more like a brother to me. An annoying little brother who shouldn’t tell anyone what he thinks about me and Tex.”
“I got it.”
“Do you?”
“Yes.” He pantomimed zipping his lips. “Your secret is safe. I just don’t know why it’s such a big deal.”
“Because it’s up to Tex when he wants to come out.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah. Oh. This is all new for him. He didn’t expect to be with a man, ever. He’s going to need a minute.”
Joyride nodded. “Okay. I hear you. I was pretty weird about it at first, too. I mean, I knew I was gay, but I was a little afraid of anyone else knowing. I’ll keep my trap shut.”
“Thank you.”
He held up the smallest cup from the carrier. “Can I give this to Ruby?”
“How hot is it?”
He took a sip of it. “Lukewarm now. It’s had time to cool off.”
I nodded. “Sure. Go ahead.”
He twisted to offer the drink to Ruby, who abandoned her sippy cup to grab it. She took a gulp without hesitation, despite having no idea what was in the cup. It must be nice to be so trusting.
She smacked her lips, stared at the cup as if it was the holy grail, then started guzzling as fast as she could.
“Slow down, girl!” Joyride said with a laugh. “Damn. I feel like a drug dealer.”
“You are,” I said as I drove down the bumpy trailer park road toward the park exit. “Chocolate is addictive.”
“Oops.”
I turned onto the highway and headed for the north side of town, where the River Rocks Rehab Center was located two blocks from the hospital.
“Okay, spill it. What happened with your dad?”
Joyride sighed heavily. “Nothing that hasn’t happened a bunch of times before.”
“Which is?”
“He wants to control all my decisions.” He grimaced. “I know I’ve made mistakes. Bad ones. But I don’t want to work for him and live with him and let him decide where I go or who I go out with. It’s suffocating.”
I kept my eyes on the road, but I could hear the frustrated tone in his voice.
“You’re an adult, and you can make your own decisions.”
“Exactly,” he said.
“But—”
He groaned. “Nooo. No buts.”
I chuckled. “You know what I’m going to say, don’t you?”
He slumped in his seat. “Something about me showing I can make good decisions by actually holding down a job and not staying out till 3 a.m.?”
“Pretty much.” I shot him a look. “You stay out till 3 a.m.?”
“Well, not every night, but it takes a while to drive back from Omaha after a night at the clubs, so…”
“You’re going clubbing? How often?”
“Most weekends. I don’t know. It’s not like Riverton is overflowing with single gay dudes to fu—”
I slapped a hand over his mouth before the curse word could slip out. He mumbled a sorry behind my fingers and I lowered my hand.
“Okay, I get that you’re young and want to have fun. But if you want your dad to treat you like a responsible adult, you’ve got to show him something.”
“Yeah, I know. I just…I can’t get with these jobs, you know? They all just feel like a road to nowhere.”
“So, go to barber school. You can come work with me.”
He chuckled. “Really? Clint would let me?”
“He’s going to retire, eventually.”
“Nah, I don’t think messing with hair is for me. And I can’t draw for shit, so don’t suggest tattooing with Knight.”
“What did you want to do before?”
I didn’t have to explain before what. Our lives were all divided into before prison and after prison.
“I don’t know. My parents wanted me to go to college, but I wasn’t ready. I was going to take a gap year. Eventually, I figured I’d give in and do whatever my dad wanted.”