Chapter Five
Cassie couldn’t settle, and when Isla and Harriet returned, she didn’t need to see her daughter’s face to recognise the fear for her brother when she found out he hadn’t come home yet.
Cassie tried to be calm and positive as she rang Rory again and again.
Each time the calls reverted to voicemail and nausea was turning her breakfast to ashes.
Maud, so sensitive to the altered mood amongst her family, stuck close to Pippa as the four of them waited in the garden for news.
Thirty minutes later, Isla leapt to her feet. ‘Mum, they’re here!’ She shoved her chair aside as she raced towards the yard. Cassie was only a stride behind, almost tearful with relief as a mud-spattered and grinning Rory propped his bike against the wall and Raf dismounted.
‘Rory, where the hell have you been?’ She forgot every attempt at calm and immediately realised her mistake as his face fell. But he was here and safe, and that mattered far more than her own fears. She stuffed her phone into a pocket as she caught Raf’s eye and mouthed a distracted thank you.
‘I went to Dorothy’s with Jacob,’ Rory muttered. He seemed to shrink as his face paled with worry.
‘But why? What were you doing there?’ Cassie simply couldn’t imagine.
‘We went to see Flynn.’
‘Flynn?’ It took her a second to place the name. ‘The wolfhound? But Rory, we barely know him, or if he’s safe around children! Please tell me you didn’t go in the stable on your own and…’
‘No, of course we didn’t. Dorothy let me feed him.’ Rory’s chin rose. ‘She doesn’t think I’m stupid. And I’m not a child.’
‘Rory, I don’t think you’re stupid!’ And now wasn’t the time to take issue over whether her teenage son was still a child or not.
‘But why would you go and see Flynn without telling anyone? I could have gone with you.’ A vision of the dog watching them yesterday, stood in his stable, dropped into her mind.
‘Because he looked sad when we left him. I know what that’s like and I didn’t want him to be sad. I thought he might like some company.’
‘Oh, darling.’ Cassie rushed forward and wrapped Rory in her arms, trying to blink back tears.
He already topped her by a few inches, this tall, gangly boy who still loved a hug.
Sometimes when she was working at home he’d appear at her desk, and she’d pause, hold out her arms. And her boy, her lovely, sensitive and gifted boy hurtling towards adulthood, would step into her embrace.
She’d hold him as she’d never been held by her own parents, and remind him how much she loved him, how proud of him she was and that they travelled this new road together.
‘But as long as you’re okay, then that’s all that matters.
Why didn’t you pick up when I called you? ’
‘I forgot to charge my phone. Sorry, Mum.’ Rory was never quite glued to it as much as the girls were to theirs.
Cassie always felt she wasn’t enough for her children on her own, and much as she knew Rory loved her, he wanted his dad around too.
There were times when he tried to step in and help, to be the man around the house, watching online videos to learn how to take care of some tasks together.
She was careful to encourage and thank him, while trying to not make him feel responsible for more than he should be at his age.
She released him, scuffing her shoe on the ground as she glanced at Raf. Pippa was on her phone, presumably letting Gil know. ‘I’m sorry for panicking and dragging you into this. And everyone else.’
‘Hey, it’s fine. It’s what I’m here for.’ He looked from Cassie to Rory. ‘So how was Flynn? Happy to see you?’
‘Yeah.’ Rory’s face lit up, and her heart lurched at the sight. ‘After we fed him, he put his paws on the bars so I could stroke him, and he was wagging his tail the whole time. Dorothy said he’s really gentle and it’s not his fault he’s clumsy because he doesn’t actually know how big he is.’
‘Right,’ Cassie said faintly. She knew where this was going and needed to get the idea out of Rory’s head before he ran away with it. They couldn’t possibly have Flynn; it would be lunacy, and she hadn’t ever looked after a dog full time. ‘Rory…’
‘Then we took him for a walk in the orchard, but Dorothy said not to let him off in case he tried to chase something. He’s so big, Mum, his head is up to my waist. He was really good, though. We had to pass some sheep and he didn’t do anything.’
She managed to refrain from pointing out that had Flynn wanted to run after the sheep, there wasn’t a single thing either Rory or Dorothy could have done about it.
‘He does seem very sweet, darling, but perhaps it’s because he’s not used to living at Dorothy’s yet.
He might be different in a few weeks when he’s feeling more settled. ’
‘Dorothy thinks he’d be better in a new home. She said he’s too young to stay with her forever, but it would need to be a very understanding one because of his size and that he can’t be left alone for long.’
Cassie hated to extinguish Rory’s hope, but there was simply no other choice. She had a sudden image of being towed around London streets by a dog as big as Posy, and that was enough to strengthen her resolve.
‘Rory, Dorothy wouldn’t let us have Flynn,’ she said gently, steeling herself against his disappointment and resentment. ‘Our house and the garden are way too small, and we couldn’t give him the space or time he needs. Maybe after the summer, we can think again, about a dog.’
‘You mean it?’
‘We can definitely talk about it,’ she promised.
She’d always wanted one and her walks in town felt emptier without the company of her parents-in-law’s two Labradors.
Maybe there was a way they could manage, even with work, and the effort would surely be worth it if having their own dog brought more happiness to their home.
‘You must be hungry after that early start. Let’s get you some breakfast.’
‘I’m okay for a bit, thanks. Dorothy made us some porridge. It was amazing, I’ve never had goat’s milk before.’
‘Dorothy did?’ Cassie heard Raf’s chuckle, and she smiled.
‘Well, you’re very fortunate. I don’t think she makes breakfast for just anyone.
We should get going soon; it’s a long drive to Granny and Grandpa’s and I don’t want to be on the road all day.
Go and pack your things, and please would you let Isla know to do the same? ’
Rory nodded as he pulled his phone out of the back pocket of his cycling top, heading for the tent. Cassie was mentally running over what she had to do before they left, embarrassed by her overreaction.
‘Maybe it is something to consider,’ Raf remarked. He typed something on his phone before locking the screen.
‘What is?’
‘Getting a dog.’
‘I will think about it, but it’s complicated,’ she said helplessly.
‘And it definitely won’t be Flynn.’ She thought of the hope and happiness in Flynn’s gaze when they’d stroked him yesterday and made a gentle fuss.
‘And we all know what will happen. Isla and Rory will lose interest after a bit, and I’ll be doing all the work.
Maybe a kitten would be better.’ Jas would help, and there were plenty of pet-sitting services in London for when they went away.
The new tabby kittens living in the stables were very sweet-looking, if rather ferocious when approached.
‘I wouldn’t get a kitten.’
‘Why not?’ Raf’s back was facing the sun, and she had to squint into the light to look up at him.
‘I don’t think it’s worth saddling yourself with pets they don’t want.’
‘So you’re suggesting that to keep Rory happy, I should take on a massive rescue dog who’d barely fit in our house and we hardly know anything about?’
‘We know he had a lovely home and is used to family life.’
‘That’s not enough, Raf! Don’t you start too; I’ve got enough on my plate without adding another problem to the mix.
I’m sorry, but Flynn is not an option.’ She tried not to picture the wolfhound at home, curled up in bed, the company he’d provide when the children weren’t there.
‘We’d be nuts to take him on, and what am I supposed to do with him when I’m at work?
Get a babysitter? And besides, what would you know about committing to anything? ’
‘More than you probably think,’ he replied with a shrug. ‘And you always wanted a dog.’
‘Yeah, but that was supposed to be when Ewan and I moved to Galloway, and that’s never going to happen now.’ Cassie gulped back a rush of sadness at the loss of her dream.
‘I was just trying to help. Stop you making a mistake.’
‘Well, that’s not actually your job,’ she retorted, still searching for calm after the worry of Rory disappearing and then his silent plea over Flynn. ‘So thanks, but just leave it, yeah?’
Five hours and a hundred and fifty miles later, Cassie was approaching the tiny harbour village in the Scottish Borders that she’d known since she was fourteen.
When the kids were little, she and Ewan had used to play Spot-the-Sea, when the first person to catch a glimpse was declared the winner and would receive a small treat.
Isla and Rory had lost interest in the game with age and now it was only Cassie watching for that first sighting and the sense that she was nearly home, because in Galloway she was so at peace.
She felt a pang for their younger days, when they’d played endless games of I Spy and chattered instead of going online with ear buds in.
It still occasionally took her breath away to realise she was in sole charge of parenting these two wonderful young people into adulthood, and she was very thankful for the love and support of family and friends.
At least her parents-in-law, Fiona and Gordon, would be waiting as usual to greet them.
‘Nearly there, Mum.’