Chapter 14 #3
Smacking her lips repeatedly and grimacing at the bad taste in her mouth, she flung back the covers and slid to her feet, but as soon as her head was upright, the room began spinning. She grabbed onto the bedpost to keep from falling over. Catching sight of the near-empty wine bottle, she groaned.
Dragging herself to her feet, she shuffled to the bathroom and stood beneath a cool shower to try to rinse the alcohol from her brain.
Eventually, she got out and brushed her teeth, gagged on the toothbrush, dragged a comb through her hair, pulled it into a ponytail, and finally, put on her most comfortable pair of sweats and a baggy tee with a sports bra, though she’d have preferred no bra at all. Everything that touched her skin hurt.
Stupid man, making her feel so miserable. Well, now that she’d had time to think, she had an earful for him. Just wait until she saw him this morning. She pulled on her thickest, softest socks. As she scuffed out of the room and down the hall, she passed Ethan’s bedroom.
The door was open. The bed was made.
She kept going down the stairs. He’d taken his guitar off the sofa, so he must’ve been up before her. The smell of coffee beckoned so strongly that it overcame the nerves rioting in her stomach at the thought of seeing him at the breakfast table.
Only, she didn’t. Nobody was at the table, and it had been cleared, except for some flowers in the middle—bluebonnets and black-eyed Susans—and a fat brown accordion file. How late had she slept?
Chelsea came in from the kitchen, two big mugs in her hands. “Heard you coming down the stairs,” she said, then saw Lily’s face and blinked. “My goodness.”
“I owe you a bottle of wine,” she said by way of explanation.
“Then you need this more than I realized.” She put a mug in front of Lily, then took a seat.
Lily sank into the chair, not entirely on purpose. “Ethan’s leaving.”
Chelsea reached across the table to cover her hand with one of her own. “He’s already left, hon.”
“What?” Lily looked up fast, blurting the word in a knee-jerk reaction, despite that she’d heard Chelsea perfectly well.
“He said he had to get an early start. He left that for you.” She nodded at the thick folder. “Said to tell you he’d be in touch.”
“Huh.” She couldn’t meet Chelsea’s eyes. This was too much, and she was going to burst into tears in front of her at any moment.
“Listen to me, Lily. I’m gonna talk to you like I would if you were my own daughter.
” Chelsea clasped her hand tighter. “This is not over. He’s scared.
I can see that. I think this has more to do with his own issues about who he is and who his father was, and my sister’s death, and now this brother coming out of the woodwork. ”
“He doesn’t see me,” she said.
“How could anybody not see you, Lily? You beam.”
She didn’t, though. Why did everyone keep saying that?
She took a deep, nasal breath. “He says he’s not good enough for me. Thinks I’m some kind of angel.”
“More that he thinks of himself as some kind of monster,” Chelsea said. “But that’s not fatal. Neither of those things is. You just have to show him the difference.”
She shook her head slowly. “Honestly, Chelsea, I think you were right to begin with. I don’t want a man I have to work this hard for.” She sipped her coffee, sipped it again. Her spine straightened a little. Then she said, “Can I get a to-go cup?”
“Sure. Where you going?”
“The cantina. Apparently I’m the one running things while he’s singing to horny honky-tonk honeys.”
“He only has eyes for you, Lily. You want some breakfast first?” Chelsea asked.
“I’m good.”
“I made blueberry muffins.”
“I could take one to go.”
Chelsea went to get a muffin. Lily opened the folder and looked inside. On the very front was a letter from Ethan. She glanced at the kitchen, where Chelsea was warming her bun in the microwave. Ther was time, so pulled out the single sheet of paper, written in Ethan’s messy scrawl.
Hey, Lil,
You’re probably mad as hell at me right now, and I don’t blame you.
But I want you to set all that aside and consider this offer.
For all you’ll be doing now that I have to go, I ought to double your salary.
But I didn’t take out a big enough loan to do that.
So I’m offering something else instead. Half-ownership.
You’re doin’ all the work anyway. Think about it.
I’ll be home for the grand opening. We can do up the paperwork then, if you agree. Everything you need to run things in the meantime is in this folder.
Do whatever you want with the remodel. I’ve loved every idea you’ve had, so cut loose. I can’t wait to see it.
Ethan
Nothing personal. Nothing about his feelings, or that he’d miss her. Nothing to give her any modicum of hope whatsoever. God, why did she even care?
The dam broke, and her tears spilled.
Chelsea came in from the kitchen with the bun in a plastic container in one hand, and a bottle of ibuprofen in the other, but she set them aside and wrapped Lily in her arms. “Oh hon!”
Lily sniffled and wiped her wet cheeks. “Sorry,” she said, then she nodded. “He left me that.”
Chelsea looked at the note and when Lily nodded, she picked it up and read it quickly. And then, very slowly, a smile spread over her face. “Don’t you see what this is, Lily?”
“I don’t know.” She sniffled harder. “Guilt, maybe?”
“No.” She slid the letter back into the folder. “He can’t let go of you. He tells you he’s leaving, that you can’t be together, and then he immediately finds another way to tie himself to you.”
Lily blinked, lifting her head to meet Chelsea’s eyes, which immediately went soft and sympathetic.
Chelsea handed her a paper napkin. “He probably realized how angry you’d be at him walking away like this and got scared you’d tell him to take this job and…you know. So this is his solution. He can’t let go of you. He probably doesn’t even see it himself. Yet.”
Lily took the napkins and wiped her tears. “You think that’s what it is? He’s trying to hold onto me?”
“I’m a psychologist,” she said. “And I think it’s blindingly obvious.”
Lily considered that, and that he was naming the place after her. Well, her and her mom, but her really. That didn’t seem like the act of a guy who didn’t want to be with her.
She couldn’t help the sigh that escaped her, or the way her eyes fell closed. “I really, r eally don’t want to get my hopes up again,” she said.
“Focus on the cantina, then,” Chelsea said. “I kind of think you’ve found your calling, there. Your father does, too.”
“You guys talk about me, do you?”
“Of course we do. We chat about our kids while cooking together whenever he’s here.
” Chelsea dropped the ibuprofen and the plastic container into the gaping top of Lily’s shoulder bag and leaned in to kiss her cheek.
“Have a great day, Lily.” And then Chelsea’s phone buzzed from where she’d left it lying on the table.
“You, too,” Lily said, and started to turn, but then Chelsea grabbed her forearm.
“Hold on, hold on.” She was staring in alarm at her phone, which she then showed to Lily.
Garrett: Minor fender bender outside the station—all good. I’m fine.
Lily’s brows shot up. “He had an accident?”
Chelsea tapped his face on her screen and put the phone on speaker as it rang on the other end.
Garrett picked up with the words, “Hello, hon. I told you I was fine.”
“I’ll be the judge of that.”
“Well, hold up a second then.”
Ellipse dots did their teasing dance and were then followed by a seconds-long video of Garrett with his arms out at his sides, turning in a full circle, to show himself unscathed while someone else apparently held his phone.
Lily laughed softly.
Chelsea rolled her eyes. “What happened?”
“Ah, I had a brain fart. Backed right into the mailbox outside the station.”
“The mailbox?” Chelsea looked at Lily, frowning.
“Yeah. Before the morning pick-up, too. Mail everywhere. I gathered it up, though. Hope nothin’ got lost. Gotta go. Love you, babe.”
“You hope nothing got lost,” Chelsea repeated.
“Nothin’ to worry about,” Garrett went on. “Back bumper’s scraped up, is all. I’ll be home for lunch, and I’m buyin’, okay?”
“Okay. Love you.” She hung up. Then she smiled and met Lily’s eyes. “Sorry to hold you up, like that. Scared the crap outta me for a minute.”
“I’m glad he’s okay. Are you sure you are? Accidents are scary.”
“Oh, I’m not sure that was an accident,” Chelsea said. “And I’m pretty sure something did get lost in all the spilled mail.”
And the light dawned. “Willow’s paint sample?”
Chelsea shrugged, eyebrows high, but yeah, that was clearly what she thought.
“Go on, now get busy. You have a lot on your plate.”