Chapter 27
Twenty-Seven
Honor Gravehart
Sunday
Smoke filled the basement, drifting heavily through the air and putting minds at ease.
The tip of my spliff burned bright between my fingers while my brothers and Rize joked about everyday shit I couldn't give a fuck about, but I listened anyway 'cause it meant something to them and they meant the world to me.
"I think it might be a wrap on trying to get a son outta Chosyn," Wolfe vented.
"You cool with that?" Rize asked.
"Hell, no, he's not cool with it," Crown answered for him.
"Nigga, I asked Wolfe," Rize shot back.
"I don't give a fuck. That's my muthafuckin' brother, so I answered." Crown shrugged.
"Wolfe," Rize pressed, adding emphasis, "how do you feel 'bout that shit?"
Wolfe leaned back. "Having a son would be lit. Nix is cool, but her momma not gon' let me put her in football and shit."
"She might. They got a two-hand touch league starting up in Briar Ridge.
"How you know?" Rize asked Crown.
Crown smiled proudly. "'Cause I'm starting it. Four is pregnant with girls, so I gotta make sure they can do all the same shit these nappy-headed rugrats do."
"Nigga, congratulations!" Wolfe grinned, dapping him up.
"Fuck! Don't say shit to Chosyn, Navy, or the twins. I wasn't 'posed to say shit. Four wants to announce it in the bridesmaids and groomsmen proposal bullshit she's putting together."
"How you gon' call her idea bullshit?" I laughed.
"That's what that shit is. Fuck I look like proposing to y'all niggas to be my groomsmen? You niggas don't have a choice but to stand behind me and cheer a nigga on as I watch the love of my life become my wife."
"I can't believe this silly nigga getting married," Rize huffed. "Four's good for you though."
"Yeah," Crown smirked. "I love that girl more than anything in this world. Four is really my heart with glasses."
"This nigga can't ever not mention her glasses," I clowned.
"You damn right. It's my favorite thing about her. While other bitches are wearing contacts and getting Lasik, Four rocks her thick-ass lenses proudly. She embraces being blind, and I love that for her."
"Four's gon' beat your ass if you keep calling her blind." Wolfe chortled.
"Shit, she is. I tried putting her glasses on one day and walked straight into a muthafuckin' wall.
I was lumped up for a few weeks behind that shit.
" Crown laughed before his tone shifted.
"Nah, but forreal, I love her glasses 'cause the last nigga tried to make her feel away 'bout wearing 'em like she wasn't beautiful with 'em on.
Everything that nigga muddled her about, I had to fix that.
Confusion can't live where she resides when I'm her nigga.
So, what if she's blind? She gon' be my blind bat 'til the day the casket drops. "
We all nodded except for Rize. We understood that kind of love.
Most people would say the way we loved our women was obsessive, but they didn't understand.
We loved 'em out loud, so nothing outside of us could shake their confidence.
Chosyn, River, and Navy knew they were top tier 'cause their niggas made sure they heard it daily.
"Y'all three niggas really in love, and that shit's fire to see," Rize nodded. "It gives a young nigga hope that there's still some good ones amongst the hoes."
"You say that like you ain't found yours." Crown smirked.
"Where's she at?" Rize laughed.
The three of us looked at each other.
"Kyree," we said in unison.
"Nahhh," he dragged out, shaking his head, "me and Fav ain't like that. We just on some cool bestie type shit."
"Yeah, ight," Crown snickered.
"You call her Fav for a reason. Don't let that shit go over your head," Wolfe added.
Rize waved us off. "Y'all niggas dragging it."
"Word of advice," I cut in. "Protect her like she's the blood making it possible for your heart to beat."
"That's a bit extreme for besties, nah?"
"Nigga, no," Wolfe and Crown said together.
"You got her moving weight with you in Ember Hills, but you can't make sure she's good on all fronts?" I asked, letting something slip that only Rize and I knew.
Crown shook his head. "Four's gon' beat your ass when she finds out what you got her lil' sister doing."
"She's good enough to risk her life to make money with you but not good enough to protect like you protect yourself?" Wolfe pressed. "If that's how you moving, then we failed you as big brothers."
"Nah, I protect her. I'm just saying y'all adding sauce that's not needed. We cool."
"Yeah, ight," I rasped.
Rize shifted. "Get this shit off me. Weren't we talking about kids? Honor, you want any?"
The room stilled a little. Rize didn't realize he was opening a door that wasn't meant to be opened.
I stared at the smoke curling toward the ceiling.
"I never wanted kids forreal," I admitted. "Lucian said some shit to me back in the day that fucked my head up and made me feel like bringing a kid into this life was selfish. Navy recently told me about the abortions she had in the past."
"Damn," Wolfe muttered.
"Nah," I shook my head, "I get why she did it."
The spliff burned lower between my fingers, catching my eyes.
"But what fucked with me is how she gave up our son without telling me."
"Nigga, what?" Crown blurted.
Rize straightened up.
Wolfe's jaw tightened.
I leaned forward, ashed my spliff into the tray, then buried my face in my hands.
Speaking on the son Navy thought I didn't know about, was never supposed to happen.
I told myself I was gon' take that to the grave, but now that it felt like that six-by-six plot was coming sooner than I expected, and I wanted to free myself of everything I kept buried.
I didn't want anyone's last memory of me to be a nigga who did everything but speak the truth.
"She got pregnant, fourteen years ago."
"How the fuck did we miss that?" Crown muttered more to himself than to the room.
"She carried small and kept saying she was in her nineties era when I asked about the baggy close. She had a small pudge but blamed it on bloating." I shrugged like it was nothing, when really it was everything.
"How did she have the baby without you knowing?" Wolfe asked.
"She had him premature. I was out of town handling something for Lucian when it happened." My jaw tightened. "A part of me felt like he knew and that’s why he sent me on the job instead of Chance. She had the baby and gave him to a nurse that helped deliver him."
"Damn," Crown exhaled. "I hope my nephew's living a good life."
"He straight," I said. "He lives at Gravehart Homes."
"Nigga, what?" Crown snapped upright. "Who is he?"
"Wolfe knows him."
Wolfe's eyes narrowed. "Nah, I don't know who your son is. You know I don't fuck with that place. The only time I stop by is when Navy needs me to speak to a young kid there named—"
"Mekhi," I finished.
Wolfe blinked. "Nahhhh. I caught his little ass tryna make a play at that supermarket over there. He seemed like a good kid running with the wrong crowd, so I started looking out for him. But I didn't know that was your fucking son."
Crown shook his head slowly. "Nigga, you been playing big brother to your nephew, that's crazy."
Wolfe looked at me. "If you knew I was hanging with him, why you ain't speak up?"
"You know this nigga is allergic to the truth," Crown joked, but there was weight behind it.
"Don't start that shit again," Wolfe warned.
"It's jokes," Crown waved off, then looked back to me. "Forreal why you never said shit?"
"I thought saying some would do more damage than good," I answered honestly. "The nurse who had him was a sweetheart. I made sure of it. And when he ended up at Gravehart Homes, Navy did everything she could for him without letting it slip that she was his mom. He didn't need me."
"Nigga, that's your son. He needs you," Wolfe gritted.
"He doesn't," I disagreed, shaking my head. "Navy kept him from me for a reason. I'm not cut out to be nobody's father. I'm just happy I'ma leave something in this world that's better than me."
"You saying that shit like you plan on dying soon." Crown laughed until he saw my grave expression. "Do I gotta call couch lady 'cause I'm not dealing with them suicidal thoughts, my nigga?"
"How is therapy for you?" Wolfe asked.
"It's straight. I'm only two sessions in, but Dr. Lockhart is cool. I'd tell anybody with a past like ours to tap in."
"Crown set that up for me." Wolfe nodded, then turned to Rize. "You wanna get something on the books?"
"Nah, I'm good," He chuckled lightly.
"Aye, I been thinking about doing a group session with you niggas. Y'all down?" I asked.
"I'm with it," Wolfe agreed.
"I gotta see you in action." Crown smirked.
"Nigga, it's therapy, not a movie." Rize laughed.
"Real shit comes out when you're sitting across from couch lady," Crown stated. "She don't let you run."
"Finding joy in that shit is sick," Wolfe muttered.
"It's not joy in his trauma," Crown corrected. "It's joy in finally being able to understand this nigga."
They started arguing, and I leaned back, trying to figure out how to shift the energy toward why they were here.
"Aye," I cut in. "I got some I need to tell y'all."
"Don't tell me you got another kid," Crown scoffed.
"Nah. Lucian wants us to have dinner at his place tonight."
"For what?" Rize asked.
"To celebrate me taking over."
"I thought you wanted out?" Wolfe questioned.
"I did. Taking over is the only way out. He wants to celebrate, and I didn't want y'all walking in blind."
"Fuck that shit," Wolfe gritted. "I'm not sitting at a table with—"
"Yes, you are," Crown spoke, his voice firm. "None of us fuck with that nigga, but if Honor says he needs us there, we're showing up."
"Before you start defending me," I added. "River and Chosyn are coming too."
Crown let out a low chuckle. "Is that why you told us to bring them over? We all supposed to leave here and pull up over there like one big happy family?"
"Yeah." I nodded.