Chapter 14 – Khaotic
Chapter
Fourteen
TWO WEEKS LATER
KHAOTIC
It seemed like every week I was attending somebody else that I love funeral, and at this point, a nigga was over it.
This beef was dragging on and on, and the only nigga I’ve been able to catch lacking was Lil Insane, and that was only because them niggas didn’t even fuck with the lil nigga anymore.
On top of that, somehow even his little ass had managed to get the drop on me and had somehow been able to get at my girl, Khaos.
Seemed like niggas didn’t want me getting no pussy out this bitch.
We weren't official, but we were getting to know each other. She was the first chick that I had started fucking with since Ashanti had gotten killed, and now she was gone. I didn’t attend her funeral because I didn’t want to get caught lacking, knowing that I didn’t know anybody she fucked with besides my rival, Insane.
Meech's family had gone all out for his going-home ceremony.
The colors were black, white, and gold. They had pictures blown up of him everywhere throughout the building; he was very loved and honored.
He was a good nigga who was gone too soon, and I was going to miss him deeply.
We had stopped hanging around each other because of some rumors I was hearing about him and my girl Ashanti, but I couldn't really be mad since I had banged his bitch a couple of times until she started to catch too many feelings.
To me, Ashanti was loyal, but different levels and definitions came with that title.
“What are you doing here?” I turned around and saw Meech’s Baby Mother, Kennedy, standing behind me.
I smiled at her. I couldn't front and act like I didn’t miss her little feisty ass just a little bit. She was a cool person, funny as fuck, and her pussy was good, but this wasn’t the time or the place.
“Meech was my nigga. Where else would I be?” I asked, looking at her sideways.
“Well, from what I’m hearing, he was killed over you and your family's beef, yet somehow your ass is still breathing.”
“So you want me to be the one dead?”
“I'd rather it be you than him,” she said, sucking her teeth.
“At least you're honest,” I said with a chuckle.
“It ain’t shit funny, Khaotic. Ever since Meech met you, he’s been caught up in all kinds of bullshit, and now my son doesn't have a father. Meanwhile, you're walking around untouched while every person around you is dying left and right, and dropping like flies.”
I dropped my head, thinking about my loved ones who were no longer here.
“Listen, I know a lot of this shit is my fault, but I want you to know that beef was my brother's beef, and it carried on to me.
I never intentionally got Meech caught up in the middle of this shit.
I know my nigga was trying to do the right thing on the strength of you and his family, and I never meant for him to get caught up in my family drama.
If you and my Nephew ever need anything, you can let me know, and I promise I've got y'all.”
“Yeah, you're going to have to since you're Keyshawn's father,” she said, completely throwing me for a loop.
“Wait, what the fuck did you just say?” I asked her to repeat that shit.
“You heard me,” she whispered. “You’re my son's father.”
I took her by the arm, dragging her out of view so that we could talk in private. I needed to know what the fuck she was talking about and where was all this shit coming from.
“How long have you known this shit?” I asked in disbelief.
“From day one. You think I’m so much of a hoe I don’t know who the fuck my kid's father is?”
“Fuck all that; don’t try to play that victim shit with me. Did Meech know?” I had to ask.
“Yes, he knew. I told him a couple of months ago. Why the fuck do you think that he stopped hanging with your ass? What was the real reason?” She questioned sarcastically, as if I was supposed to know. I wasn’t a Mother fucking mind reader. I didn’t have any real idea why Meech had fallen back.
“Everybody knows that y'all were both fucking each other bitches so let’s be real, we’re grown.”
“Mannnnn, what the fuck!” I stressed, pacing back and forth, not believing the shit that I was hearing.
“And you wait until my homebody’s funeral, the day he’s being buried, to tell me this shit!
” I continued stressing. I couldn’t believe the nerve of this bitch.
Keyshawn was four years old and had known me as his uncle for all of these years, and now this bitch is telling me that he’s my biological son; this shit couldn’t be real.
“Get the fuck out of your feelings; it’s not like you didn’t have a clue there was a possibility he looks just like you, and you were fucking me raw from day one. At least I told you.” She said as if that made the fact that I had a son that I barely knew any better.
“I don’t know why bitches like you do the shit that y'all do. Keep children away from their Fathers and wait until it’s confirmed only for y'all asses to finally speak up and say something.”
“What the fuck do you mean, y'all? Don’t compare what I do to any other bitch or your bitches. I did what I did for the safety of my son. I didn’t want to have a baby by any street nigga, which is why me an my nigga never had a child.
What happened between you and me was unexpected; don’t make it seem like I planned this shit. ”
“Shit, you probably did with your shady ass!” I commented half jokingly.
“Nigga please, having good dick doesn’t make you a good father.” She said before trying to walk off. I stopped her by grabbing her by the arm.
“I wanna see my son.”
“You can and will when I say so.” She dared to say.
“Why is everything always on your time? Don’t you think I missed enough time in his life not knowing he was mine?”
“You’ll live. I’ll let you know when I’m ready for all of that. Until then, just be thankful that I told you.” She said before walking away.
I stood there feeling stupid and looking stupid.
This was a funeral home, but it was taking everything in me not to kill this bitch and send her to be buried next to her nigga.
I was pissed. Even though Meech was my boy, I couldn’t believe that he knew that Key was my son and tried to move on with life as if everything was normal.
He was a fool if he really tried to think that he was just going to raise mine and it wasn’t going to ever get back to me.
The entire funeral was awkward for me, sitting there listening to family and friends refer to my son as Meech’s son.
I couldn’t keep my eyes off Keyshawn the entire home-going ceremony.
I never noticed the resemblance between us until now, and I somehow blamed myself for not seeing the similar features.
By the end of the funeral, my heart was torn, and my emotions were mixed.
I decided not to attend the burial for my own selfish reasons, which I knew was going to get the streets talking, but at this point, I didn’t even give a fuck.
I was tired of attending funerals one after another.
I was tired of seeing the people that I loved buried under the ground.
But most importantly, it was hard seeing my son and not being able to interact with him.
I knew that Kennedy said she wanted her space to decide when she wanted me to be around, and I was only giving her that respect for today due to the sensitivity of the situation, but there was no way that she was going to continue keeping me away from my son, especially since I now knew the truth.
I wanted a relationship with him; I wanted to be present in his life.
I had always vowed that no matter what the situation or circumstances were, I was never going to be a deadbeat to my child.
I was going to let her have it for now, but she was going to see me soon.
After leaving the funeral, I pulled up to Eddie's Liquor store and staggered out of my F150 silver pickup truck to get another bottle. My little homies and I had just finished off a fifth of Hennessy, and now it was time to reup. My homie had gotten buried today, and on top of that, I had found out I was a dad, so it was both a good and a bad day. I was mourning and celebrating all at the same time, so a nigga was fucked up and still going. I walked into the store, showing love to the niggas that I knew and grew up with. I made eye contact with some nigga on his way out. His eyes looked familiar, but with the way he was wearing his hoodie low over his head, I couldn’t tell where I knew him from.
This wasn’t my hood, but I had migrated to this area when my parents moved here.
I quickly began building a name for myself, and being out this way kept me out of trouble, so it became my main hangout spot.
“What’s good, bro? Sorry about your loss!” One of my homies, whom I grew up with, offered me his condolences.
“Good-looking,” I said, keeping it short. I wasn’t in the mood, and on top of that, I was fucked up. I knew that I wasn’t on my pivot and didn’t plan on hanging around too long for that reason. I walked straight to the counter.
“What’s good, papi? Let me get a fifth of Henny and Raw Long. Give me a bottle of Grabba and a bag of those chicken skins, too.” I ordered.
As soon as he handed me my shit, I turned to get up out of there.
As I headed for the exit. As soon as I opened the door, shots began to ring out towards me in every direction.
I backpedaled backwards into the store and took cover behind the counter.
The shots continued for a while. I reached into my waist, grabbed my strap, and pointed it towards the door, ready to give it to any nigga that touched the threshold.
By the time the gunfire stopped, I was sober.
I walked out of the store cautiously, wondering who the fuck just tried to kill my ass in broad daylight.
I noticed the nigga I saw in the store pass by the following block and decided to follow him.
The closer I got, the more my memory began to come back, and I was able to see exactly who he was; it was that nigga Lil Insane.