Chapter 6
Six
ISABEL
Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry.
I manage to ask a uniformed maid for my room and barely make it inside before my eyes water. The minute Rocío picks up, they pour out of me.
“Oh no, Sabs, what happened?”
I blubber through my tears and tell her everything.
“That fucking bitch,” she says.
“I want to go home,” I tell her. Fuck what Natalia will say. I need to get out of here. “I don’t—I can’t—”
“Don’t let her get to you. You’re there for a bigger reason. Think of your book! And—and this buys you time to do your research, right? Make a dent to that Tbr. You deserve a good break, Sabs, and it’s a great opp—”
“It’s not worth it. It’s not, Rocío. I—” I hiccup. “This isn’t a break. And I can find something else to write about. It just—it just feels like I’m back there. In high school. I—”
Chiara pokes her head into the door. I drop my phone to my lap and swipe away at my tears.
“Sorry,” Chiara says to me. She points at the other bed in the room. “I was just going to get my charger. Sorry. Are you okay?”
I sniffle. “Yeah. I’m fine.” I flip my phone and glance down. I press my lips together at a nodding Rocío and end the call.
“I’m sorry about—” Chiara starts.
I shake my head. “It’s okay. I’m used to it.”
Chiara sits on the rug next to me. “They gave me a lot of shit when I first started dating Cisco, too,” she says. “But they’ve warmed up to me. They mean well. Their humor’s just…”
Cruel? Vindictive? Mean? All words that are going straight into my notebook the minute I calm myself down. “I know,” I tell her.
She manages a thin smile. “You should get changed. Seriously. The pool is to die for. And you can ignore the others and stick with me and Erin.”
I swipe at my nose this time. Don’t let her get to you, I hear Rocío saying in my head. I can’t let Natalia win. I need her to know I’m not the same girl she used to push around in high school. I’m better now, stronger. I can take her bullying in stride. I will make art out of all this pain.
I nod at Chiara and manage a smile.
“Good girl,” she says to me. “Do you need to borrow a swimsuit?” I glance at her chest, covered in a tiny string bikini, then mine. That top probably wouldn’t even cover my nipples.
“I’m good,” I say. “I packed my own.”
“Okay,” she says. “I’ll be outside. There’s sunscreen in the bathroom, and if you need me to put some on your back, just let me know, okay? I’ll wait.”
I thank her and unzip my suitcase. She’s nice, at least. If I can make it through this summer having made one friend, with usable notes or otherwise, then it won’t have been for naught.
Silver linings, I tell myself. Even without the net, God is still with me. I might be falling, but there’s no way He won’t catch me.
* * *
I plop down on the lounge chair on Natalia’s left, dressed in my pink bikini under a sheer white blouse Mama hand-stitched for me when we went to the beach in Bataan several summers ago.
It’s embroidered with tiny flowers around the collar, and a patch sits directly over the center of my chest. Natalia is engaged in conversation with Luz and Ravina, while Chiara steps back into the pool and into Cisco’s arms.
“What’re you guys talking about?” I ask Natalia.
Ravina lifts her shades and answers, “We’re planning a shopping trip for tomorrow. And then deciding whether we want to go to the spa that night, or the day after.”
“That sounds fun,” I say. “Is everyone invited?”
“Just the girls,” Luz answers. “The boys are going to play footy in BGC.”
“Cool,” I say. “What time are we leaving?”
I can feel the indignation radiating from Natalia. How dare I invite myself to their plans? I stifle my laughter. I wish Rocío was here to see this.
Luz glances warily at Natalia, then says, “Natalia booked us some appointments with some stores starting at eleven.”
“Oh, yeah?” I feign interest. “Which stores?”
“The usual,” Natalia snaps. “Nothing you can afford.”
I clench my fists. Bitch. “Well, the invitation says it’s all expenses paid, right?” I grin at her. “Just kidding.”
Our conversation is cut short by Jaime dropping down next to me and shaking his hair like a wet dog.
“You’re back,” he says. His thigh presses into mine.
I can’t lie; the contact feels nice. He’s always had an easygoing charm about him that made him incredibly dangerous.
I toy with the idea of inserting a character based on him in my book.
Where would I even place him? I guess I’d have to finalize my plot to get there.
Any minute now, God. Would love a nice, sturdy net to catch me.
Jaime curls a finger under the hem of my blouse and smirks. “I like your outfit.”
“Do you?” There’s an undertone to his voice that has me shifting uncomfortably in my seat.
I don’t know whether Natalia still has any feelings for him, and I’m not exactly interested in dating her ex.
I’ve heard Luz make allusions to pagpag when Inigo briefly dated another girl from our class during one of their months-long breakups. It’s abhorrent on so many levels. But—
But what? I grapple with my ethics and my own selfish desire to see whether Natalia would get jealous over Jaime flirting with me. Water seeks its own level, rise above it, yadda yadda yadda.
“Mm.” Jaime lifts my blouse to reveal my bikini. “Very nice.”
A beach ball bonks Jaime in the head.
“Shit,” Kieran says. “Sorry!”