Chapter 49 Chelsea
Chelsea
When Stave drives me across the barrier, it hurts. My chest caves as we push through, and I feel, for a brief flicker, the tug of Eryx—the pull of love, the pull of hope.
And for a split second I think I feel it—the bond. That connection we had. But it's just an echo. A ghost of what we were.
The barrier doesn't even recognize me as his anymore.
Sorrow crashes down.
Everything I stuffed deep into myself comes out like lava shooting from a volcano. How much I loved Eryx, how he accepted every part of me, how I accepted him, and how he made me his monster.
And then snatched it away.
Tears fall and I know Stave hears from the front seat, but I wipe them away and sniffle as little as possible.
When he sweeps past Helena’s house, I spot a For Sale sign pushed into the grass.
My stomach turns. Where is she? Can she hurt Eryx from wherever she is? Will she rip Nightmare away?
Oh God. What if she kills Eryx?
My breath catches and I force myself to exhale slowly. I can’t be betrayed by Eryx and run to help him.
He's alone. Vulnerable. And I must leave him that way.
Because he chose this.
Yet guilt still sits heavy in my chest.
I push Eryx from my mind and stare out the window, but Helena creeps back in. Where did she go?
I may not have my shadow claws anymore, but I still have fingernails.
Stave pulls the car up in front of my parents’ house. He takes my bag from the trunk and moves to carry it up the steps, but I stop him.
“I can take it from here.”
“You don’t have to.”
“It’s okay. Thank you, for everything.”
His eyes soften as he takes me in. “If you need anything, don’t hesitate to call. You will always be my mistress.”
My heart wobbles at that and a sob threatens to spill out of me, but I wrestle it back down. “Thank you.”
Before the tears can come, I take the suitcase and head up the steps. I throw open the door and run all the way to my bedroom, where I fall on my bed and cry.
When I walk into the kitchen as my family’s getting ready for dinner, everyone goes still.
My parents look at each other, and my sisters stop talking. I force myself to smile. “What? Do I have something on my face?”
My dad stops tinkering with the model dragon he’s working on. I have no idea what it’s made of, but the small creature sits back on its hind legs, opens its mouth and releases a line of fire.
That’s how I feel too, buddy. Join the club.
“Everything okay, Chelsea?” Dad asks.
“Of course. Never better.” I tromp into the kitchen and open the fridge. Pull out the jug of sweet tea inside and start to pour myself a glass. “Just thought I’d hang out here for a while. ’Cause, you know, I missed y’all.”
Dallas grabs a stack of plates to set the table, but when she hears what I’ve said, she asks, “Okay, what’d he do?”
I stand there for a moment, telling myself I can be strong, but my lower lips begins trembling. “Nothing. It’s fin—”
I’m trying to say the word fine, but it comes out broken, and then I start crying again, except this time it’s huge, wracking sobs.
Next thing I know, my entire family has surrounded me, except my dad of course. It’s too many women for him, I think.
My sisters tug me onto the bench. One of them hands me tissues, another curses Eryx, even Emory asks if I want them to go over there and kick his ass.
That makes me laugh, and the tears start to dry up. Not completely, but enough that I’m able to tell them everything and end with, “So I left and came here. I didn’t know where else to go, but if one of you has already claimed my room—”
“That would be me,” Dallas says, “but as you can see, I haven’t moved in yet.”
“That’s because you don’t really want to move out,” Emory says. “You just want everyone to think you do.”
Dallas’s only reply is to shoot my sister a dirty look.
My mom takes my hand. “Helena Buttercup is dangerous? Honey, why didn’t you tell us about the casserole?”
I cringe. “I’m sorry. I guess I thought…I knew y’all were safe. She didn’t want to hurt any of you. She just wanted Eryx and me, I guess.”
“And she attacked you?” Dallas stretches her cowboy-booted feet out in front of her. “She better be glad she moved, because if I see her again, I’m gonna drop-kick her into next week.”
I laugh. Really laugh like I haven’t in days. “And the magic? Is it okay?”
Mama nods. “We’ve been doing fine. Honestly.” She hesitates. "And your magic? How is it since the…unbinding?"
I flex my fingers. Gold sparks flicker. "It's there. Just empty. It's mine again. But less.”
"Less powerful?" Emory asks.
"Less me,” I correct quietly. "When it was bonded with his, I felt fierce. Strong. Now it just feels ordinary."
Dallas squeezes my shoulder. "There's nothing ordinary about you, Chelsea."
But I don't believe her.
Mama’s eyes drop to the wedding band on my finger. “What are you going to do about Eryx?”
I follow her gaze to the black and gold band on my finger. “I honestly don’t know. But I thought spending some time here, with y’all, would help me figure it out.”
“That’s perfect,” Dallas says, “because I would love to have you cover some of my shifts at the store next week.”
I playfully shove her in the shoulder. “I just showed up and you’re already putting me to work?”
She shrugs. “What else are sisters for?”
I hook my arm around her neck and give her a noogie. She shrieks and yanks out of it. “That’s it! You’re getting it now!”
Before she can grab me, I tear out of the kitchen and up the stairs. House responds to all the ruckus—the bricks clink together and the wooden floorboards rumble as I race up the stairs to my room and slam the door.
A second later Dallas is pounding on it. “Wait until you come out! I’m gonna get you.”
And for once my spirit is lighter.
But as soon as the lightness creeps in, the darkness follows.
I left a place where I didn’t have a choice and came back to another. Maybe control was never meant for me.
The only thing it’s ever brought me is pain anyway.