23. Wolf
Iwoke early to find Emi curled against my side. At some point she’d found her way across her own bed and now her cheek rested against my chest while one arm was thrown across my waist. There was no denying the effect it had on my body, and I didn’t just mean the way my lungs constricted when she gave a soft snort and shifted closer.
The gentlemanly thing to do would be to slide my arm from under her and set her back on her pillow before she awoke to realize she was cuddling the man she hated. Luckily, I was no gentleman.
Instead, I curled my arm around her back and held her, breathing in that delicious Emi scent while I could. I would take this sliver of paradise, this one taste of Emi being mine in a heartbeat of perfect stillness, and I would treasure it when she was gone.
After last night, she might look at me differently, but that didn’t mean she felt the same way I did. I’d hoped seeing the enclave—what they meant to me, and what I meant to them—would be enough to spare my life in her eyes, but that was the most I allowed myself to hope. Only a fool would imagine that she could ever forgive me or that we could have this for real, and I was no fool, either.
When I opened my eyes again, I was alone. I gave myself a breath to relish the lingering smell of warm vanilla on my skin and smiled when I pictured her waking up to find herself twined around me. My poor little kitten must have been horrified. No surprise that she’d snuck away.
I found her not at Fawn’s fire, but sharing a cup of porridge with Bear, Robin, and Hawk. They were deep in conversation and it pleased me more than I expected to see Robin so engaged with Emi. She was like a sister to me, and seeing that Emi had gained her approval somehow made me glow inside. It was good to see Hawk with them too. He was basically my second in command, along with Lynx, so his trust would go a long way with any others who weren’t already won over by Emi’s kindness and good heart.
“Enough for one more?” I asked.
Bear handed over a mug, and I scooped the remaining porridge from his pot. It was thick and hot, with the perfect honeyed sweetness that coated my insides going down. We still had a curse to break, but I could enjoy a good meal and a morning with friends before going back to the cold and the Mist.
Emi wasn’t quite meeting my eyes, and I suppressed a chuckle. She’d dressed, while I’d only added my tunic, knowing we’d be leaving soon anyway.
“What were you all talking about?” I asked.
“You,” said Robin, at the same time that Emi replied, “Nothing.”
Amused, I couldn’t help myself. “Are you saying I’m nothing, witchling? Because I think I make quite a good pillow, for one.”
Finally, she met my gaze and a thrill zipped through my veins at the fire in her eyes. “Nothing but flea-bitten freckled menace, yes.”
I burst out laughing. Robin and Hawk joined in, and even Bear ducked his head and shook.
“Oh, I like her, Wolf. Maybe we’ll trade you for her,” Robin teased.
She wasn’t getting away with that, so I reached over and mussed her hair. “No you won’t, you pesky bird.”
“Hey!” She shoved me off and landed a punch to my shoulder. Any other day, I’d consider challenging her to a sparring match. Robin was a force to be reckoned with despite her small stature. But today, I had other things calling.
“Sorry, birdie, vengeance must wait. We have to get back to Ruby’s cottage to see if Em’s new magic can figure out how to cure us from this curse.” I turned to offer Emi a hand up, mildly surprised when she took it without question. “That okay with you, witchling?”
She nodded, but said she wanted to check on Fox first and say goodbye to Fawn. I went to follow, but Robin held me back.
“You sure you know what you’re doing?”
I sighed. “No. I haven’t known this whole time. The prophecy said—”
Robin punched me again. “Not about the curse, stupid. I mean about her. You have feelings for her.”
I’d never been able to hide things from Robin. “I’ve got it under control. Nothing to worry about.”
“Oh, Wolf.” Before I knew it, she was embracing me hard and tight. My arms lifted to hug her back. Robin was tough and practical, so when she let go and looked up at me with soft eyes, it nearly broke me. “I’ll always worry about you. And we’ll be here for you no matter what, whether you break the curse or not, and whatever happens with your witch. You might think you’re hiding it behind the flirting and jokes, but I saw how you watched her last night. You checked up on her so often I thought your neck would be sore this morning.”
I moaned. “I did not.”
She patted my arm. “You’re cute. The thing you might not have seen is the way she watched you, too. She tracked you the whole time you made your rounds, and don’t think I didn’t notice the way she blushed furiously when you walked in this morning. I don’t know what happened between you two—”
“Nothing happened. We slept, that’s all.”
Robin pumped her eyebrows and gave me a sly grin.
“I mean it. She may not hate me as much anymore, but that doesn’t mean she likes me either.”
Robin’s teal-blue eyes went to Fawn’s fire where Emi stood with her back to us, her hair cascading over the red hooded cape. “I’ll bet you two skinned hares that she likes you plenty. I’m not saying you shouldn’t be cautious, but don’t lock yourself away like you do.”
“I don’t do that.”
“You do. You’ve stuck yourself into a lonely caretaker role here. Most of us have found comfort in each other over the annums, casually or more intimately, but you stick to friendship and to yourself. Like you think a leader needs to stand apart and spend equal time with everyone. I’m saying, if you love her, let her in.”
“It’s not that serious, Robin. Don’t worry.”
She abandoned the topic and nodded over my shoulder, where Emi was approaching. “Be safe out there,” Robin told us both, then she turned back to me, “and we love you no matter what happens, Wolf.”
I hadn’t known I needed to hear that until it felt like a weight fell from my shoulders.
At the magic barrier entrance to the enclave, Emi turned around for a last thoughtful look at all the people gathered to watch us go, and the others going about their mornings. She was quiet as we prepared to step through, but I saw her slip her dagger from its sheath to hold it at her side.
I nodded my readiness and let her follow me through the gap. After everything—after finding her cuddled to my side this morning and getting to hold her, and after seeing the way she ingratiated herself with my family—I knew I wouldn’t hurt her. Not ever. I could walk by her side as a wolf, and she’d be perfectly safe and protected.
And if I had to drop my clothes before shifting, well…that was just a necessity of this life. A bonus. Not my fault.
Who could blame me for using what I had when it garnered that pretty blush? I”d take what scraps I could get, and the memories would have to keep me warm at night once this was over.
I let the summoning fire guide me into the Mist. Pain shattered through me as I shifted, sweet and sharp as muscle and bone melted and solidified into my cursed form. My paws hit the leaves coating the forest floor. Scents and sounds intensified, and my vision sharpened with edges of silver.
While Emi walked beside me, I found it easier than ever to keep my own mind. None of the wolf”s instincts to hunt or protect my pack from her rose to the front this time. She held her dagger at her side, ready in case I lost control, but I wanted to tell her she didn”t need it.
I was at peace.
Something had shifted inside me. She was as much a part of my pack and my heart as any of the enclave, even though I couldn”t have imagined this mere days ago. Robin called it love, but all I knew was Emi had healed me, and that had bonded something between us. At least, it had for me.