Chapter 24
TWENTY-FOUR
Hush
I can’t stop thinking about Danika and us on the cliff.
Had I said too much? Let too much of me into her space.
She does something to me and letting her in isn’t as hard as letting others in.
I can’t fucking explain it. Nothing makes sense to me when I recall how easy being around her felt or how badly I want more of it.
Watching her in the studio was refreshing and my chest ached when she moved. She was at peace, finally at peace.
“Looking good, brother.” Tank claps my shoulder as I rise, throwing a grease covered towel over my shoulder.
I study the engine of the car I told myself I’d fix, and I must admit, it does look good.
It took a few weeks, but I replaced the transmission.
That’s how long it’s been since the cliff with Danika and since she’s been staying in my room at the clubhouse.
If I ever did need to go inside, her scent was everywhere.
Vanilla and coconut. Even in the dead of winter she smells like sunshine and summer.
Staying at the cabin is quiet yet deafening at the same time.
Deafening in the sense, I’m always wondering what she’s doing.
Is she all right? Is she in pain? The voices are more silent than they’ve ever been.
I let the hood close with ease. “Hopefully it runs.”
“Start her up.” Tank crosses his meaty arms over his chest.
With the turn of the key, she hums with fire. Almost as if she’d been dying for this.
Tank nods. “Hell yeah. She got a new life. Nice work, man.”
That tightness in my chest releases and my mouth turns up. “Yeah. Look at that.”
There wasn’t a doubt in my mind what I’d do with the car once she was fixed. I knew when I agreed to work on it, where it’d go.
“You mind if I take her off the shop’s hands?”
Tank raises a brow with a smirk. “She’s all yours. Maybe she’ll get you off your Harley before you kill yourself.”
The words sting under my skin. “She’s not for me.”
His smirk grows bigger. “Ah. I get it.” He rubs his thick beard. “Well, I’ll see ya later, brother. Some of us are headed over to the Fallen Star for drinks. Interested?”
My brothers invite me on a weekly basis, but I always say no. “Okay.”
Tank straightens, surprise written all over him. Yeah, me too. “Well, Shit. Hell yeah.”
I tell Tank I’ll meet him outside so I can wash up and change first.
Heading across the small distance to the clubhouse I pull out my phone. I’ve been wanting to text Danika for a while and maybe now’s the time. I write out the message and then delete it. I do that about five times before finally typing something and hitting fucking send.
ME: Heading to the Fallen Star with the crew. You wanna go?
What the fuck am I doing? This is dumb. But just as I’m about to slip my phone away, it vibrates.
Danika: I was wondering when you’d finally text me. Getting ready now to head over there with the girls.
She was waiting for me to text her.
My fingers start moving but then I erase the words. I’m actually fucking nervous texting her. Like a damn kid in high school. I rub my hand down my face with a grunt. This is more than just nerves—there’s a slight tick of excitement and it’s been so damn long. A feeling I didn’t know I missed.
I shut out the pain, letting myself forget.
Just. This. Once.
Without time to head home, I know I still have clothes upstairs, so I head there and stop as I take in Danika’s lingering vanilla scent outside the hall. Shadows move every now and again with noises under the door.
With a deep inhale, I knock.
When it creeps open, her beauty slams into me like a brick to the face.
My eyes can’t help but trace over every single part of her, from her curled hair that lays perfectly over her shoulders, to her dark eyeshadow that makes her blue eyes pop like the deep ocean.
The tight tank top underneath a loose sweater and jeans hugs her like a dream.
She’s curvier than I remember. Not the trauma made skin and bones from when I first saw her back at the warehouse.
“Do I look okay?” She anxiously looks down at herself worried my staring meant she doesn’t look good.
My eyes shoot to hers. “You’re perfect.”
She stills, the tiniest bob from her swallow moves the delicate skin of her throat. “Oh… thank you,” she whispers and heat flares through my veins. “Sorry I took over your room. It’s all yours now.”
“I told you, it’s yours for as long as you need it to be.”
She smiles. “I’m going back to my apartment, I just—”
I reach out and lay a hand on her waist, an action we both look shocked by. But I don’t let go, instead, I give a little squeeze of reassurance. “Stay. Don’t go back.”
We hold our stares. “You’ve been really kind, but I’ve already talked to my roommate, and I’ll be moving back soon. Her boyfriend won’t be bothering me.”
At least her roommate is taking Danika’s side. All I do is nod because the tight squeeze in the pit of my stomach is enough to silence me.
She glances back inside. “I can wait if you want to ride together.”
I drop my hand from her already missing the way she feels under my palm. “Okay.”
She lets out a shaky breath and steps aside allowing me to pass, brushing the side of her body along the way. I close my eyes because a single touch is sending me into this unexplainable spiral.
But she does that to me.
Every time.
Danika
The sound of the shower takes over the background while I study the books on Hush’s shelves. I’ve been here two weeks, and I have yet to peek at what Liem likes to read.
I run a finger along the leather spines of each classic novel including Romeo and Juliet, Anna Karenina, and The Wings of the Dove. I’m not entirely familiar but looking up each one, they’re about tragic love loss and mental health in some form.
It’s a sorrowful pain I can’t deny. How bad is Liem hurting?
After telling me about Gracie, it was a lot to process because I thought I made it up in my head.
There’d be no way for the same woman who imprinted on my life in such a way I can never forget, belonged to Liem.
It’s the craziest most delusional concept, except it’s true.
She is the same woman. A part of me hates it.
My stomach turns sour knowing they were together.
She got to experience his joy. His sadness.
His everything. And that absolutely destroys me.
But then I remember she’s no longer here and it’s the reason for Hush’s suffering.
I need to put my selfish feelings on hold because it’s not about me.
Yet, how can I feel so connected to both of them?
A tear falls and I quickly swipe it away as the door opens to the bathroom. Hush wears only a towel secured around his waist, his hard muscles, and tattoos on full display.
Holy hell.
It’s a glorious sight.
“Sorry, old habit. Not used to walking out with someone here.”
I shake my head, not sure if the reassurance is for him or me. “No. It’s fine. You’re fine.” I roll my eyes.
His brows furrow as he steps my way, the scent of his soap swirling in the space around us. “Are you all right?” He scans my face in worry.
“I’m fine.”
“So you’ve said.”
My gaze drifts down to each swirl of ink on his chest and arms and then every ripple of muscle. My breath hitches by accident and Liem takes a step back like I’ve frightened him. He turns grabbing a plain T-shirt from the drawer and a pair of jeans.
“I’ll be right out.” He disappears behind the bathroom, and I sink into myself huffing out a breath.
My god.
On the way to the Fallen Star, we grab a ride with one of the guys while Liem hides behind the wall he put up.
Somewhere between the clubhouse and here, things got awkward.
We make it ten steps forward then five back.
I don’t know how to keep up with him. Sometimes he’s so broken and a million miles away.
I hate to see him that way. But in all honesty, I get it.
We hadn’t had much interaction since the cliff, so I get it.
We enter Jules’s bar and Tequila dances to the song in place as the guys disperse to the back where the pool tables are.
Throttle kisses Tequila’s cheek. “You gonna be all right, my rose?”
“We’ll be fine. And take Hush with you,” Tequila sneaks that in, Liem not hearing, or at least I don’t think.
“How’s your pool skills, brother? Want in?” Throttle claps a hand to Liem’s shoulder, and he spares me a glance. It’s a silent question, asking if I’m okay.
But why wouldn’t I be?
Our connecting stares are broken as Tequila pulls me through the crowd over to the bar and our faces light up as Lucy pops up from behind it.
“Luce! You’re our favorite bartender but why are you always working and never on this side of the bar?” Tequila pouts, smacking the countertop in a dramatic show.
“Gotta pay those bills somehow, T.” Lucy smirks, juggling tall beer glasses around.
“Don’t I know it,” Tequila scoffs.
“Oh, please! Your knight in shining armor swept you up off your feet and took you away to his castle.”
“Hey. I still work for my rent.”
Lucy laughs, her deep dimples showing themselves. “Oh, honey, I bet you do.”
Tequila’s mouth falls open and then she bursts into laughter. I can’t help it, I do too.
“Just get me a long island iced tea, pleaseee,” Tequila stresses. “And…” She looks toward me.
“I’ll have the iced tea without the good stuff.”
Tonight is an alcohol-free night.
“You got it. Coming right up.” Lucy taps the bar with her knuckles before preparing our drinks.
My eyes venture to the guys in the back and my pulse leaps when they lock with Liem who’s already watching me, his arms crossed, ankle over top of the other.
His body language screams unapproachable.
But he does something to me every time. It’s like my skin gets set on fire.
And it’s not the bad memory kind, it’s the heated sexual, I want to climb him kind of feeling.