Chapter 25 Rae
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
RAE
I wake up in a bed, tangled in sheets and coverlets, daylight slanting through the tall window. Squinting, wincing at the pounding in my head, I turn resolutely over and pull the covers over my head.
Then I pause mid-movement.
Jai. He’s asleep, seated on the bed beside me, chin to his chest, muscular arms folded over his chest, his back to the headboard.
Where are we…? Oh wait.
This is my bed. I recognize the room I was given after the first trial. But that was… many days ago, and then there was the second trial and…
The memories filter back and I suppress a flinch as the panic and fear tear me apart again, as I swim and dive and haul Jai out of the water, as we flee from the attack of the draks and take flight in the sky.
Oh Gods… I sit up, letting the coverlets fall to my lap. I’m wearing Jai’s black jacket, my ruined gown pooled around me. As I shift, I ache deep inside and another memory hits me.
The terrace.
Phaethon.
Shit.
Turning my head, I give Jai another look. He’s fallen asleep with his long legs slightly apart, dark hair falling in his eyes like always, and…
His chest bare.
My mind goes sort of blank. A common occurrence around Jai, especially a half-naked Jai, and now I’m not ruled by painful arousal—that is, not yet, though I’m quickly getting there—I can really appreciate his physique.
Those cut muscles, the long neck marked with dark swirls flaring into broad shoulders.
The bulging biceps. The chiseled pecs with more dark marks and those lighter lines that spill down to the hard planes of his stomach, encircling the dip of his navel.
It’s an eye, but it seems to shift as I gaze at it, making my head hurt.
It doesn’t detract me from my ogling, though, and I take in every hard line and plane, every dip and hollow so perfectly outlined even in rest.
With his dark, messy hair and sharp jaw, the marked cheekbones and soft mouth, that incredible body taking up essential space, long legs encased in black leather and tall boots…
I have seen the looks both fae and human women cast him, their sighs as he walks by, their whispers of “Athdara!” and “delicious” they breathe behind their hands.
Like Phaethon said, he’s so handsome, darkly sexy, he sure has his choice of females.
But they also fear him. They fear his magic, his closeness to the king… and Phaethon’s cruelty. I’ll never forget that when I first met him, he told the guards to feed me to the fish. I know now that it was Phaethon speaking and that Phaethon didn’t care for me then.
Does he care now?
“I have respect for you.”
I scoot closer but hesitate to touch him. I want to trail my fingertips over those dark marks, over his lips, over his long lashes, then down his neck to his muscular arms.
I have no recollection of his arms around me during the night. Phaethon isn’t much for cuddling, I suppose. Was he the one asleep beside me during the night?
And now? Is he going to be Jai or Phaethon when he wakes up?
“We’ll fight over you.”
Hells.
That hurt in his eyes when I asked if I was going to find Jai with me come the morning… it bruises my mind.
Is respect enough? Have we reached a truce? Does it matter when he stated clearly, over and over, that his goal and the king’s align? In the greater scheme of things, he’s still my enemy.
Fucking or no fucking.
His head lolls to the side and he lets out a little snort. Wait. Is he… snoring? Was that a snore?
Oh my Gods, why is that so cute?
Athdara, dragon summoner and army general, host of a moody, dangerous Eosphor and wielder of bloodthirsty shadows, cannot be cute.
Oh no. I can’t be feeling like this, the awareness of him meshing with the realization of a deeper truth, the truth of who he really is.
His tousled black hair beckons, the itch to touch it too strong to resist. I reach out and stroke an inky lock, tuck it behind his ear. So soft. His hair is so soft, it—
His eyes fly open. Fingers like nightgold wrap around my wrist, squeezing. His dark eyes stare at me, unblinking and unseeing.
I fight to free my hand but his grip only tightens.
Shit. Ow. I grit my teeth and struggle some more, gritting my teeth. Shadows unfurl around him, wrapping around my arms, around my neck. I choke.
The noise has to register because he blinks, his dark gaze regaining focus. “Makhair? Fuck.” He releases my wrist instantly, then reaches for me again. Stops, hand hovering in mid-air. “Fuck, I hurt you.”
The shadows fade, tendrils sliding against his neck, curling like a cat’s tail.
“I’m fine.” I rub my wrist, giving him a rueful smile. “Never touch a sleeping warrior. I should have known better.”
“No.” He shakes his head, frowning. “You shouldn’t have to worry about touching me. I should stay away—”
“Jai. Stop. I’m fine.”
He watches me, his mouth turned into an unhappy line. “I almost snapped your wrist. Almost choked you.”
“I’m alive.” I wave my hand. “And it’s not broken. See?”
Then it hits me.
It’s him. It’s Jai. I should have guessed from the way he talks, the concern he shows. From the shadows and the leather pants and boots they materialized as he slept.
I grin, relieved—but would it have been so bad if it had been Phaethon I woke up to? For the first time, I think… not. Maybe? Gods, this is hurting my head.
Yet I’m glad to have Jai back. Jai, who now shifts on the bed and grimaces. “Dammit.”
“Are you okay?”
“Fucking Phaethon, he made the wound worse.” Then, before worry gets the better of me and I demand he shed his pants so I can examine the wound, unexpectedly he grins. “I would have done exactly the same.”
The impact of what he’s saying hits me and I have to look away for a moment, to collect myself and contain the huge grin that splits my face.
He touches my arm and I turn my gaze back to him. “Would you have?”
“Oh yes.”
“Did you feel anything? When we were… You know.”
“When you were with Phaethon?” Jai nods. “I felt it. It was as if a barrier fell for a while and I felt everything.”
“I thought I saw the shadows,” I whisper. “Your shadows. Like wings.”
He felt it. I was both with him and Phaethon and the thought makes me both cringe and smile.
I wonder if Phaethon did it on purpose. If he yanked that barrier down or if it was involuntary. He said they merged better during battle—so maybe also during sex?
Could that be why he didn’t hurt me? Did Jai’s presence in his mind gentle him?
“A golden coin for your thoughts,” he whispers.
“They aren’t worth that much.”
“I’d give the world’s riches for your thoughts, makhair.”
A sweetness spills in my chest. “I…” But I don’t know what to say.
“And I’d give everything to hold you in my arms.”
I clear my throat. “You don’t need to pay for that.”
“No?” He opens his arms and I’m not even ashamed for the speed with which I throw myself into them. “Gods, woman…”
“What?” I mutter, burrowing against his warm, hard chest, encircled by his arms. He holds me like one holds a firefly, securely but ready to let go.
“I fantasize every day about holding you like this, don’t you know that?”
“I didn’t know,” I grumble.
“Well, remember it. Remember I’d let go of the world to hold you instead.”