Chapter Twenty-Four
Keaton
T UCKER FUCKING KNOWS . Somehow he found out about Ruby being me and I can see the pain filling his eyes as he stares at me.
He’s right in the fact that I should have said or done something to let him know Ruby and I are the same person.
I flirted with him at that festival and if I hadn’t been dealing with the loss of Nora and taking care of Bridger, I would have messaged him back as Ruby.
Instead, I met him as Keaton and fell for him in a matter of seconds as I watched him gently rock Bridger on the side of the road before helping me and ensuring we were taken care of.
He didn’t hesitate for a second when I needed him the most and we were strangers.
That’s always been the kind of man I wanted in my life because it’s what I see in my dad as he takes care of my mom, me, and anyone else who needs a helping hand in life when they’re at their lowest.
“Tucker, I can explain,” I begin, letting the tears fall as he remains leaning back in his seat and releases my hand from his.
“I didn’t keep this from you to hurt or play you.
When I first started my career I was fifteen years old.
I got discovered by an artist I was writing songs for.
They had no clue I was so young because I didn’t put myself out there like that.
Other than a few home videos, there isn’t anything of me singing online.
This artist showed up and I had lost track of time as I was working on their next song.
They heard me singing and immediately called someone from their label.
I was offered a contract and that’s how it all started.
“My aunt was my manager to begin with. She’d been in the business for a long time and I knew she wouldn’t let anyone screw me over.
Plus, she would be on every tour, media appearance, and everythin’ else with me.
My parents trusted her so we made it work.
The one stipulation I had was to hide my true identity because if I became famous, I didn’t want my parents, friends, or anyone else harassed because of me.
It was my choice to sign the contract and become a singer, not theirs.
Plus, I wanted a safe space when I wasn’t on tour or working in some other way.
So, my aunt and Nora helped me come up with Ruby.
My mom is the one who gave me my stage name of Ruby.
I’ve been her since I was fifteen and I don’t really think about the differences between her and me at this point.
I’ve been working for nine years now and it’s worked out for me.
You’re the first person I ever wanted to tell the truth to.
“That night you took me to your family farm, I really debated telling you that I was Ruby. The only reason I didn’t is because thoughts of Camden filled my head.
He was the first boyfriend I had. Or thought I had.
See, what only Memphis, my parents, and Jagger know is that Camden was essentially hired to play my boyfriend while he was also acting as my bodyguard.
Every single appearance we made and outing he took me on was planned.
He was playing a part while I was falling in love.
Thought I was falling in love. The only reason I found out is because I overheard him talking to Jagger about things and that’s when I ended our relationship.
Don’t think I’m not over him, because I am.
It’s really easy to get over someone who spent two years lying to me and playing a part.
I gave that man everything, Tucker. Including my virginity.
So, I told myself there was still time to talk to you about the Ruby part of my life.
Then, it just didn’t happen,” I say as Tucker listens to every single word I’m saying to him.
“This isn’t about me trusting you, I promise. ”
“In a way, it is Keaton. Did you think it would change how I feel about you?” he asks me honestly and I can see the hurt in his eyes.
“Part of me did believe that. I’ve seen it happen so often over the years.
While I haven’t really experienced anyone using me because of the spotlight I’m under or the money I’ve earned over the years, I have witnessed it happen to Memphis and the other guys from Wicked Angels.
They’re the main ones I’ve toured with and we’ve all become close.
We’re like a family when we’re on tour. I’m just closer to Memphis than the other guys in the band.
When money comes into play, people act differently.
No, I don’t honestly believe you would only be with me because of Ruby, but again, part of me kept saying I needed more time.
I didn’t tell Wren who I was, she figured it out on her own,” I say, needing him to know that because it would hurt him even more if he thought I told her of my own free will but didn’t give him the same courtesy.
“I know you didn’t tell Wren, Keaton. I heard the conversation. I’m hurt and angry right now because of this. I guess I thought we were on the same page with things between the two of us and it doesn’t seem as if we are,” Tucker says, leaning forward in his seat.
“We are, Tucker. I’m not explaining this correctly.
Let me see if I can put it another way,” I begin, trying to think of the words I want to say to this amazing man sitting next to me.
“I know you’re not Camden. He was doing a job and getting paid to date me.
You’ve been at my side from that day on the road for no other reason than it’s because you wanted to be there.
When I’m in Briar Glen, I’m just Keaton.
I have a home on a large piece of land and I hide away from the world.
There’s a recording studio in my home and I can work regardless of if I’m recording or on tour.
I love writing songs for myself and others.
When I’m Ruby, I have screaming fans surrounding me all the time.
They find out where I’m staying if we stop at a hotel on tour and try to get to the floor and in my room.
I’ve had my tour bus broken into by fans and people have tried to get on stage with me when I’m performing just to get close.
“Camden never once paid for anything when we would go out. I’d cover the expense of everything.
Some days it wasn’t that expensive as we would grab a snack or some light meal while other days my bill was high as hell.
More than I’d ever spend on someone. At least that’s what I thought.
Looking back now, I can see all of the signs that Camden and I weren't right for one another. In the moment, I thought I was showing him I loved him. When you and I first started talking, I didn’t want to repeat the same pattern.
That’s why I suggested having dinner at my place instead of going out and used Bridger as the reason.
I needed to know I wouldn’t repeat the same pattern with you as I did with him.
Does any of that make any sense? I have no clue if I’m even explaining this right to you,” I say as frustration builds in me because I don’t honestly know if I’m saying the right thing in this situation.
“It makes sense, Keaton. I just wish you could have believed in me more than what you do now. I mean, I understand that Camden truly did a number on you and made you feel like you can’t believe in anythin’ or anyone after the stunt he pulled.
We knew somethin’ had happened between the two of you and were told not to let him near your bus or you at that festival.
It’s gonna take me a little while to wrap my head around this new information, but we’ll be okay.
Just no more hidin’ shit from me movin’ forward, Songbird.
We have to be open and honest if this is gonna work between the two of us,” he says, finally taking my hand in his again as he presses a soft kiss against it.
He then uses his free hand to wipe the tears that have steadily been falling.
“Does it bother you that I’m Ruby and will have to go on tour at times or make appearances for various media events?” I ask because I genuinely need to know how Tucker feels about that part of my life.
“It doesn’t bother me at all, Keaton. It’s part of who you are and I want to be included in it.
That doesn’t mean I’ll be able to go on tour with you all the time, but I’m sure I can make certain dates and spend time with you when you’re on the road.
We’ll figure it out as things come up. Don’t ever change who you are to fit in some mold you think you have to fit.
That’s not how life works. You are who you are and the Ruby part of your life is your job.
I don’t really know who you are as her because we didn’t really talk.
I’ll be completely honest here and say when I first met you, I was so damn torn thinkin’ I wanted two different girls.
Now, it all kind of makes sense as to why I was so attracted to both versions of you.
You’re the same person, Keaton. One side is who you are when the spotlight isn’t shinin’ on you while the other part is where all the fame comes from,” he says in a better way than I explained to him.
“Okay,” I tell him before a knock sounds on the door and it opens. I look over to see a doctor and nurse walk in the room.
“Miss Jones, how are you feeling today?” the doctor asks as the nurse starts to check my vitals
“I’ve been better. My wrists kind of sting and I’ve got a headache,” I answer him honestly.