Chapter 18 Sloane #2
“Yeah,” he says, lifting his beer to his lips and taking a sip. His dark hair is chaotic and messy, like he’s been running his hands through it. His broad shoulders are not nearly as tight with tension as they were when he went outside. “When does Uncle B usually get home?” he asks, looking around.
“You actually just missed him. He just went upstairs to shower,” I say, gesturing towards the stairs as he nods.
“How has it been living here and stuff? Is he treating you ok?” he asks. I have to stay facing the oven, because if I look at him, I’m sure that my face will give everything away. I can already feel my cheeks flush.
“Yeah, he works a lot, but it’s been nice to be back near home. The last week with Mocha has been great, so I think that it’ll be a good summer, that’s for sure.”
“That’s good,” He says.
I mix the shells, cheese, hamburger, and taco seasoning into a bowl before pouring it into a glass pan, sprinkling more cheese on top, and putting it into the oven.
A few minutes later, Beckett comes back downstairs, and the two of them immediately begin catching up.
I sit off to the side on my phone, scrolling mindlessly, waiting for the oven to beep.
When it does, I take it out and set it on the stove to cool down. While it’s cooling down, I take out some lettuce and tomato. I cut them up before grabbing the sour cream, salsa, and hot sauce.
When everything is ready, the boys dish up and begin to eat, still chatting about anything and everything, but mostly basketball and how Kaden feels about this up and his very first season in the NBA.
After dinner, Beckett and Kaden go outside to shoot some 1v1 while I clean up.
After the kitchen looks like it hasn’t been used, I throw on a sweater and also go outside.
I sit on one of the lawn chairs and watch the two of them play and talk.
I’m too far away to hear what they are saying, but I can see today’s news and feelings melt off of Kaden’s back as he does what he loves most.
I listen to the almost therapeutic thump of the basketball against the concrete, closing my eyes and letting myself relax.
I feel significantly better than I was earlier.
A weight I hadn’t even noticed was there has lifted.
A feeling of relief after sharing just a little bit of my story, of having one of the closest people to me realize how horrible Briar can be.
I look up at the stars and breathe in, enjoying being outside in the mountains.
I think that everything is going to be ok.
After about an hour, Kaden excuses himself, saying that he’ll be back in a little bit.
“You think he’ll be ok?” I ask as Beckett comes and joins me. He looks around to make sure that Kaden’s gone before picking me up, sitting down, and pulling me into his lap.
“Yeah, he’s tough, but he’s got a lot to think about right now. You mean a lot to him, and he never realized how badly you were hurting. I don’t think that any of us did.” He cups my cheek, and I turn my face into his hand, pressing a kiss into his palm.
I shrug. It makes sense, I suppose. I guess when you’re living in heaven, it’s hard to see someone else’s hell.
“No, don’t do that. Don’t shrug it off; your pain is important.
Your hurt is important, and it’s ok to feel those things.
You don’t have to explain it to anyone or justify it.
It’s your story. It’s ok to not be happy about it,” he says, tilting my chin up so that I have no other option but to look at him.
“You are beautiful, Sloane Monroe. Both inside and out. I know you don’t always believe it, but it’s the truth,” he says, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear.
“Thanks,” I say quietly.
“You’re welcome.”
He holds my face so that I have to look at him.
After a few moments, he leans in and kisses me softly and slow.
I don’t pull away; I let him kiss me since it’ll probably be the only affection I receive for the next few days, considering Kaden will be here tonight, and everyone else will be here tomorrow.
“I guess that means that you’ll have to sleep in your own bed tonight, then, huh?” he pouts, and I smile softly.
“Unless you can be sneaky,” I tease, nipping at his ear softly.
“It’s my house, I shouldn’t have to be sneaky,” he whispers, his hand tangling in my hair softly, tipping my head back so that I’m looking up at him. “If I wanna kiss my girl, then I should be able to.”
The butterflies in my stomach swarm with how easily he claims me. He nibbles on my neck softly, smirking against the skin. His stubble gently scratches my neck in the most delicious way.
I pull away just to look at him. God, he is just so good-looking, his eyes dark with desire, his strong jaw, the stubble on his face a few days old.
How did I get so lucky to have him come home to me?
He smirks down at me and kisses the underside of my jaw, then down the column of my throat. He adjusts the way that I’m sitting so that I’m straddling him as he kisses me soft and slow.
“I missed you today,” he whispers against my neck.
“I missed you, too,” I mutter, tipping my head back for him.
His lips find mine, and the kiss stays slow, soft, gentle. Even when his tongue teases the seam of my lips, he takes his time to taste me. His hands grip my waist as he holds me still.
When we pull apart, we’re both slightly breathless and panting. He rests our foreheads together, his fingers slipping under the hoodie to touch the skin of my hips.
“We should stop…” I whisper.
“You’re probably right, but I would like you to know that I don’t want to,” he whispers, kissing my nose as he pulls away. “So what did you guys talk about?” He asks, holding me firmly in his lap.
“I guess Briar told him that I didn’t have enough money to afford to go to California, and that’s why I didn’t go to the draft with everyone.”
“What the fuck?” he says, looking at me like that’s the stupidest thing he's ever heard.
“Yeah, that’s exactly what I said. Briar also told him that he calls and checks in with me once a week. Which is bullshit, because I haven’t heard from him since before I moved in.”
“I don’t understand why he’d lie about those things.”
I let out a breath and shake my head. “I have no idea. Your guess is probably better than mine.”
“Do you want me to talk to him about it?” he asks, tipping my head back and making me look at him. I let out a slow breath.
“I want to know, but I don’t want to make other people do my dirty work,” I mumble.
“You don’t have to always do everything on your own. You are allowed to ask for help.”
“I know. It’s fine, though. Don’t worry about it.”
“I didn’t ask if it was fine, I asked if you wanted me to talk to him.”
“Can I think about it?”
“Of course you can, baby,” he whispers, cupping my cheeks and pressing another kiss to my lips.
“I really like kissing you,” I say against his lips, gently rocking my hips against his.
“Mmmmm, don’t do that, or I won’t care who comes over tonight,” he whispers against my skin as his lips dance over my neck.
“Beckett…” I gasp as he kisses me harder, holding me down against him so I can feel just how much he’s enjoying this.
“Fuck,” he growls against my lips. I whimper into his mouth, and he nips my lip, softly. “You feel so fucking good, baby,” he praises. My head falls back, and he leaves open-mouth kisses on my skin as my fingers tangle into his hair.
“More…” I whimper, even though I’m not sure what I need more of, just that I need it more than my next breath.
“I wish we could, baby.”
I let out a whine as he rests his forehead to mine, pouting my bottom lip at him like a little kid. His thumb comes up, pressing against my jutted lip. I suck it into my mouth, and he just shakes his head at me in disbelief.
“You’re hard to resist, you know that?”
I smile at him, brushing our noses together. His phone dings in his pocket. I huff as he pulls away so that he can look down at it.
“Kaden said he’ll be here in a few minutes,” he says, sounding a little disappointed. I nod, slowly getting off his lap.
“I guess that I’ll just say goodnight then, so you guys can have your bro-time,” I mumble, and he stands up, a small smile on his face.
“Alright, baby, I’ll see you tomorrow. Goodnight.”
“Goodnight,” I whisper, giving him a final kiss before Mocha and I head inside and up to bed.
I take my time getting ready for bed, doing a full skincare routine and filming a couple of nightly videos before closing my day out with a journal entry.
It’s been a little while since I‘ve done one, since I’ve been spending most of my nights in Beckett’s bed. I miss it; I’ll have to keep a journal in his room so that I can start keeping up on it again.
It’s been something very helpful for me.
After moving to Athens, doing research and starting to actually work on myself, I started going to therapy, and it’s actually helped me a surprising amount.
I don’t like online therapy, so I postponed all my sessions until I get back to Georgia. James’s recommendation was to keep a very detailed journal and to highlight all the things that I think need to be discussed in detail when I get back. Or if I ever needed to, I could call him or text him.
I turn my phone off for the night, put everything away, and let myself fall asleep, or I try to anyway.
I toss and turn for the next few hours. When I can’t take it anymore, I sneak out of bed and go down the hall to Beckett’s room.
I close the door quietly, even though the room Kaden is sleeping in is across the house and downstairs on the main floor.
“What’s wrong?” Beckett whispers, pulling me into him. His half-asleep voice does naughty things to my insides.
“I couldn’t sleep,” I whisper. He just pulls me closer and places a soft kiss on the side of my neck.
“It’s ok, baby, I’m here. Just rest,” he whispers. It’s almost like he has some kind of power over me, because a few minutes later, my eyes get heavy and I actually fall asleep.